I was having a let’s-listen-to-old-LPs-I-haven’t-heard-in-a-while kind of day this weekend, so, naturally, I was doing a lot of flippin’ through stacks of wax. This got me thinking about something that I’ve never known anyone else to notice: the secret messages that are occasionally scratched into the vinyl, just inside the inner groove.
If you look at the face of a random record, between the inner groove and the label, you’ll typically see the LP number scratched into the vinyl, as well as possibly the record company name and maybe the recording studio. Sometimes, however, there’s some more stuff. Some records have what might be initials scratched in the vinyl. A few records have names scratched in: The Beatles’ Let It Be says “Wally”, David Bowie’s Changes says “JANE”, and Echo and the Bunnyman’s first album says “RyanK”. I’ve got a couple albums with little pictures scratched in: Joy Division’s Closer has a little alien head, and Parliament’s Mother Ship Connection has a flower.
What’s weirder, though, are records that have actual messages scratched inside the grooves. The things I’ve found scratched into records:
Adrian Belew, Lone RhinoSide B: a real byte!
Camper Van Beethoven, Telephone Free Landslide VictorySide A: “Propaganda, Not Lying” Side B:“The Duck Stops Here”
Firehose, if’nSide A: YANK MANANA Side B: …FROM THE NADA
Minutemen, Ballot ResultSide A: “You choose: a hero’s kingdom… Side B: …or a mean democracy” Side C: “You want to focus” Side D: “Bofus?”
Minor Threat, (untitled) Side A: Down and out, up and over Side B: Over and over, over and out
Red Lorry Yellow Lorry, Smashed HitsSide B: No probs as soon
Sonic Youth, Confusion is SexSide A: Birth of John Spencer, or what? Side B: Neutral, zensor, lgw -rip us off you need to-
Sonic Youth, EVOLSide A: Destroy all record labels Side B: Everything turns black to blue
Yeah Yeah Noh, Fun on the Lawn Lawn LawnSide B: I can sing like a frog I can sing like a girl
Yeah Yeah Noh, When I’m a Big GirlSide A: She Loves You Side B: She’s Not There
Hoo! what fun! Has anyone else ever noticed this? Got any to add? Speculation as to origins?
Robert Fripp’s The League of Gentlemen, 1979.
One side had the message scratched:
Music is the cup that holds the wine of silence
I forgot what the other side said, but it was something equally philosophical about music.
Led Zeppelin’s 12-inch single of “Stairway to Heaven,” I’m told, had
Side 1: Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.
Side 2: Love is the Law, Love under Will.
I’ve also heard this (Aleister Crowley’s famous motto of Thelema) was on an early pressing of Led Zeppelin III.
The Clash, London Calling:
Side 1: “In space . . .”
Side 2: “. . . no one . . .”
Side 3: " . . . can hear you . . ."
Side 4: “. . . CLASH”
(from memory, so I may have the breaks/punctuation wrong)
Seems like Sandinista! also had something, but I’ve no idea what at this remove.
Here’s a list of the inscriptions on the first releases of the vinyl editions:
Wuthering Heights / Kite:
Side A: Remember the whales [Moving intro sound]
**The Man With The Child In His Eyes / Moving: **
Side A: The child hides in the light
**Hammer Horror / Coffee Homeground **
Side A: Were all playing a hunch
**Wow / Fullhouse: **
Side A: Thank You Emily [Emily Bronte, author of the novel Wuthering Heights]
**Breathing / The Empty Bullring: **
Side A: We all share the same air
Side B: Happy anniversary to the p’s
**Army Dreamers / Delius / Passing Through Air: **
Side A: Life is to love
**December Will Be Magic Again / Warm And Soothing: **
Side A: Happy Christmas
**Sat In Your Lap / Lord Of The Reedy River: **
Side A: Well done JB 1st dan [JB is John Barrett (assistant engineer, see SIYL sleeve), not John Carder Bush]
Side B: Thank you Donovan [Donovan wrote Lord Of The Reedy River]
**The Dreaming / Dreamtime: **
Side A: For Rolf [Rolf Harris]
**There Goes A Tenner / Ne T’Enfuis Pas: **
Side A: Rays
**Cloudbusting / Burning Bridge: **
Side A: For Peeps
**Hounds of Love / The Handsome Cabin Boy: **
Side A: Woof!
**This Woman’s Work / Be Kind To My Mistakes: **
Side A: “Up yours Ugly!”
**The Red Shoes / You Want Alchemy: **
Side A: One for the Archers [= M. Powell + E. Pressburger]
Side B: Buzzzz
I just went to look at my copy of Sandinista to see what it said, and it says, “In space… no one… can… hear… you… Clash!” (Spread out over six sides.)
Spot used to always write little messages on the records he produced for SST. Black Flag’sDamaged says, “Comin at ya… the whole gelatinous thing.”
Zen Arcade (Husker Du) says, “Falling Shirley – Everytime I square off against someone’s God I spend the rest of the night (or day) hallucinating. And now it is the visions of a joyous hell within the circuits that make Pac-Men die and vessels disintegrate.” (Spread out over four sides.)
I don’t think it was Joe Walsh who put these here, but his producer Bill Szymczyk, who was notorious for doing this on many of the albums he produced, including the Eagles.
When I was in a band in my college days, we cut an EP (waste of money, that was). We put the message If you can read this your head is spinning on side B. I don’t recall what we put on side A.
Slight hijack, but does anyone remember the holograms they put on one or the other side of the album to prevent piracy? The one that comes to mind is Styx’s “Paradise Theater,” that, if you hold it right, has the columns and “Paradise” in a hologram on the vinyl.
