I’m on a Film Noir kick and I’d heard that THE THIRD MAN was (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk) a great film…one of the all-time greats both in noir circles and just all-around greats–it’s on (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk) IMDB’s top 250 movies at number 38! which is astonishing when you consider how heavily weighted the IMDB is towards current blockbusters.
Well, I got it from Netflix and watched it and it’s astounding. The cinematography is stunning, the camerawork excellent, the pacing a trifle odd, but good (it went in (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk) fits and starts rather than a smooth progression…but somehow it worked.) And Orson Welles sparkles. From the minute he appears he quite literally has a grin on his face that says "Um, you thought this movie was about the other guy. You’re wrong. It’s mine. :p) I’ve never seen him in a movie before (Yes, I’ve yet to see CITIZEN KANE, although it’s just moved waaaay up on my list) and if he’s this good in a secondary part, wow: I can’t wait to see him as a star. And the ending: holy crud. The chase through the sewers along with the last bit showing that betrayal, however justified, has consequences is astounding…one of the best 20 minutes of film, ever.
However.
However, there’s one (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk) flaw in this taut masterpiece. The utterly dreadful, horribly intrusive, wildly inappropriate and just plain jarring soundtrack. They got some guy who knows how to play one song (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk) on the zither and play it he does. OVER and OVER and OVER. The tune is a sprightly little number involving about 4 notes and it…well…it sucks. When things get dramatic, they play it LOUDER. When things get suspensful, they play it s.l.o.w.e.r. It’s like trying to watch SUNSET BOULEVARD while listening to “Alvin and the Chipmunks”.
The hero and (maybe) villian are in a ferris wheel and the director is building up this incredible tension with all these shots downward…will the hero be pushed? Or is the villian not a villian? The moment lingers and (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk).
The hero is trying to decide whether to betray his friend to the police. If he does, he might lose the girl. If he doesn’t he might lose his soul. And what about his friend’s victims? Don’t they deserve justice? Or are they victims at all? The cop might be lying, after all. Our hero wanders down the dark, foggy streets of post-war Vienna, flickering light casting shadows on the cobblestones and (aplinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk, plinka-plinka-plunk, aplinkaplunk. Plink-plunk)
I have never heard such a horribly inappropriate soundtrack attached to such great movie. For people who haven’t seen it, imagine the following: Picture Hitchcock’s REAR WINDOW. And then, every time there’s tension, or romance, OR comedy OR drama, imagine playing “Dueling Banjos” (which sounds vaguely like the crappy zither song). It ruins the mood, it ruins the tone and it served only to keep pulling me out of the movie.
Sigh. It’s still a wonderful movie that’s well worth watching, but if someone ever puts out a “zither-free” version, I’m gonna rush right out and get it.
Fenris