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  #1  
Old 07-01-2004, 11:25 AM
Fox Paws Fox Paws is offline
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Perfect pooping position

Here's a question to add to your list of "Things I Could've Sworn I Wouldn't Be Asked Today."

What is the ideal position for humans to do number two? That is, anatomically speaking, if I wanted to make the process of pooping as perfect and painless as possible, how would I stand/sit/lay/whatever?

As you might have guessed, I was pondering this question while sitting upon the toilet earlier this morning. I wondered to myself, "Is this really the best way to poop?" It didn't feel ideal, but I didn't engage in any experimentation since the dude in the next stall might have had, umm, "issues" with that.

So what say you? If my innards had their druthers, how would they want me to position myself for the act of pooping? Standing? Sitting? Reclined? Laying on my stomach (eww)?
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  #2  
Old 07-01-2004, 12:04 PM
calm kiwi calm kiwi is offline
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You should squat.

http://chetday.com/squattingtoilet.htm

Makes reading on the loo trickier though.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:17 PM
BobT BobT is offline
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I'm skeptical of the claim that the way I sit on the toilet affects how much I evacuate in one trip to the toilet.

I eat a lot of fiber and I drink my share of coffee so my trips are pretty quick and I doubt highly that I am carrying anything extra around in me after my trips.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:22 PM
lieu lieu is offline
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Facing outward on a Merry Go Round.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:39 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is online now
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Quote:
You should squat.

http://chetday.com/squattingtoilet.htm

Makes reading on the loo trickier though.
Various works I've read support this. The Bathroom, an architectural and (somewhat) biomechanic look at bathroom fixtures advocates it. So does End Product: The Last Taboo, the overall best book I've seen on Number 2. Squatting spreads the buttocks and allows your stomach muscles to bear down. The only time I've tried it is when camping.

Quote:
Facing outward on a Merry Go Round.
Lieu, I think you mean facing inward.


Unless it's not your face that's doing the facing.
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:43 PM
spingears spingears is offline
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The Universal Position of course.

Squatting is the original prehistoric man, modern aboriginal, and most of the animal kingdom position.

On a visit to France in 1958 I found a public accommodtion consisting of a round building with a round depression in the floor, sloping to a 4" or so hole in the middle.
Water entered tangentially to flush the basin. In addition to the hole there were two raised "footprints," one on either side of the hole. Obviously intended for squatters.

Guess you will have to learn to perch on the rim of the commode and let the chips fall where they may!
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Old 07-01-2004, 12:48 PM
flight flight is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spingears
Guess you will have to learn to perch on the rim of the commode and let the chips fall where they may!
Don't you mean the peanuts?
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:17 PM
Jpeg Jones Jpeg Jones is offline
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Or the corn?
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Old 07-01-2004, 01:27 PM
bughunter bughunter is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by spingears
On a visit to France in 1958 I found a public accommodtion consisting of a round building with a round depression in the floor, sloping to a 4" or so hole in the middle.
Such arrangements are apparently common throughout the world, FWIH.

But I've always wondered: How is a trouser-wearing person supposed to to use one of these? I mean, if you squat and lean far enough backwards so that you don't fill your pants with poo, aren't you going to topple over backwards?

Are you supposed to remove your trousers completely?

Makes one consider that there are many circumstances in which a Kilt would be superior.
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  #10  
Old 07-01-2004, 01:28 PM
Cluricaun Cluricaun is offline
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I've always suspected that going whilst performing the "Helicopter" break-dance maneuver was best, but I've never tried it.
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  #11  
Old 07-01-2004, 04:08 PM
Green Bean Green Bean is online now
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The perfect pooping position? On the Nature Splat Form, of course.
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  #12  
Old 07-01-2004, 04:38 PM
Doctor Jackson Doctor Jackson is online now
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This thread brought back a long repressed memory. Several years ago a local chiropractor used to run a "health tip" type ad in the newspaper. On of the tips was the best position to poop when using a toilet - with a diagram, even. If memory serves, the ad suggested a straight back and feet shoulder width apart with the right foot slightly in front of the left.

The straight back makes sense, but even after much experimenting I never figured out what one foot forward position had to do with anything.
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  #13  
Old 07-01-2004, 04:43 PM
scr4 scr4 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bughunter
But I've always wondered: How is a trouser-wearing person supposed to to use one of these? I mean, if you squat and lean far enough backwards so that you don't fill your pants with poo, aren't you going to topple over backwards?
Haven't you ever done it in the woods? Lower your pants to just above your knees, then spread your feet about 1 ft and squat down. Try it. There will be no obstacles between your butt and the ground.
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