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  #1  
Old 07-06-2004, 02:50 PM
Kel Varnsen - Latex Division Kel Varnsen - Latex Division is offline
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Name for people sexually attracted to mentally retarded people

Is there a name for people who are sexualy attracted to metally retarded people?


No jokes please.
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  #2  
Old 07-06-2004, 03:07 PM
Askia Askia is offline
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Do you mean to suggest there are people out there who have a sexual preference for the mentally challenged? I don't believe I've ever heard of that.

Those with delayed mental development are at significant risk of sexual abuse. I don't believe there is legal terminology that apply to people who only target the mentally challenged, but IANAL.
  #3  
Old 07-06-2004, 03:12 PM
Jake4 Jake4 is offline
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Sick.

Seriously, I've never heard of one. If you want to roll your own word, I'd assume it would end in "-phile". Possible prefixes could include brady- (slow), hypo- (under, deficient), or proto- (primitive).
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Old 07-06-2004, 03:14 PM
GorillaMan GorillaMan is offline
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Who said it had to be a legal term?

I've definitely heard a "-philia" word used in this context, but I'll be damned if I can remember it (or Google it)
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Old 07-06-2004, 03:23 PM
Askia Askia is offline
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Nobody said it had to be a legal term, GorillaMan, but I can't imagine that a word like this existing and no one's used it a criminal proceeding against, say, a caregiver with a pattern/history of sexual misconduct with his/her charges.

We are all assuming the person attracted to the individual who is mentally retarded is themselves not -- correct?
  #6  
Old 07-06-2004, 03:24 PM
Kel Varnsen - Latex Division Kel Varnsen - Latex Division is offline
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Retarduphilia was my best guess, but it doesn't seem to be a word.
  #7  
Old 07-06-2004, 04:50 PM
Trigonal Planar Trigonal Planar is offline
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EVERY fetish that one could conceive of likely exists. No doubt the OP's fetish exists and no doubt there are sites devoted to it on the internet. Its just a matter of determining the correct word. As suggested, it likely ends in -philia. There was a link posted a while back with an extensive list of odd fetishes...maybe someone could check that?

Perhaps when I'm home and safe from work I'll stick a few terms into google and see what comes up...
  #8  
Old 07-06-2004, 04:56 PM
Revtim Revtim is offline
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I've heard of a person like this; I think she prefers to simply be called "Laura Bush."



I know you said no jokes; I'm very sorry.
  #9  
Old 07-06-2004, 05:01 PM
Askia Askia is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Revtim
I've heard of a person like this; I think she prefers to simply be called "Laura Bush."
LOL!! Best. Cheap. Shot. EVER.
  #10  
Old 07-06-2004, 05:13 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
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They're called predators, and they're despicable.

My niece was being approached by a (married) man at her office. Everyone in that office knows of her disability, so he wasn't flying blind. She was flattered that someone was paying attention to her and probably had no idea what was on his mind. He started taking her to lunch and then arranged for a dinner date.

At that point, she mentioned to my sister (her guardian) about her new friend who buys her lunch. A few questions later, my sister was out the door and in the guy's office to inform him of exactly what legal repercussions he could expect if he pursued this activity.

And it isn't "sexual attraction to retarded people", it's "sexual predation", pure and simple.
  #11  
Old 07-06-2004, 05:28 PM
GorillaMan GorillaMan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chefguy
And it isn't "sexual attraction to retarded people", it's "sexual predation", pure and simple.
They're two different things. One is simply targeting a vulnerable group because of their vulnerability, the other is a particular paraphilia. Yes, the two can go alongside one another. It doesn't mean that the particular obsession doesn't exist.
  #12  
Old 07-06-2004, 06:56 PM
Green Bean Green Bean is offline
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There was a Law & Order: Special Victims Unit episode about a store owner who repeatedly molested his developmentally disabled employees. In that case, it seemed that he was targeting these young women because of their vulnerability, and in some cases, ignorance. I don't recall that he was supposed to have a particular fetish for the mentally retarded, however.

Quote:
Sick.
And why is it "sick" to feel attraction to the developmentally disabled? There are significant reasons why it may be wrong to follow through on the attraction, but I don't see anything inherently wrong with the attraction itself.

Quote:
And it isn't "sexual attraction to retarded people", it's "sexual predation", pure and simple.
Again, this guy was probably a sexual predator. But he may well have felt a genuine attraction to your niece. Should he have pursued her? Of course not. That was clearly unacceptable, and if he had managed to get her to engage in sexual activities with him, it would be rape.

But just feeling an attraction to an inappropriate sexual partner doesn't make you a sexual predator.
  #13  
Old 07-06-2004, 07:07 PM
Qadgop the Mercotan Qadgop the Mercotan is offline
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There are sexual predators who target those with diminished capacity, but there are also those who truly are attracted emotionally and sexually to people with diminished capacity. I suspect common traits for these individuals would be a lack of confidence for dealing with more emotionally and intellectually mature members of the gender they're attracted to, along with a certain desire to care-take.

While certainly an undesirable character trait, it wouldn't brand someone a predator automatically.

One could invent a name for them, such as cretinophile or morophile, but those words derive from some rather misused terms and wouldn't fly very well. I've googled a dozen likely coined terms such as those above, without luck.

Maybe just call it "mental subnormophilia"?
  #14  
Old 07-06-2004, 07:19 PM
clairobscur clairobscur is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chefguy
And it isn't "sexual attraction to retarded people", it's "sexual predation", pure and simple.

Would you mean that you would forbid any relationship between a mentally retarded person and another who isn't?????
  #15  
Old 07-06-2004, 07:30 PM
clairobscur clairobscur is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Bean
. Should he have pursued her? Of course not. That was clearly unacceptable, and if he had managed to get her to engage in sexual activities with him, it would be rape.
.

Why would it be necessarily rape???? Can't these people have satisfying sexual or sentimental relationship with a normal person??? Should they be deprived of any choice in their sex-life????


You're admiting yourself that he could have been genuinely attracted to her and not trying to take advantage of her. Why on earth would have it been wrong to sleep with her, in this case??? What if she was genuinely attracted to him too? Should they be denied the right of living on their attraction??? What the fuck is that??? What if they wanted to live together??? To marry???
  #16  
Old 07-06-2004, 07:59 PM
Vlad/Igor Vlad/Igor is offline
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The question as to whether or not a mentally challenged person (forgive the PC term) can enjoy a relationship depends on their ability to function independently of the other person, and be able to make decisions about the relationship. Granted, there are normal people who are completely dependant on the other, and can be coerced. But they also have the potential to think and act independently of the other person. Mentally challenged people are not always able to do so.

Sexual consent also would follow the same line: can a mentally challenged person adequately understand what they are being asked to do, and thus provide an informed consent. Again, there are a number of normal people who, having lived a naive life, may not be able to give a truly informed consent, either, and that could be considered rape. But again, they have the potential to give or refuse to give an informed consent.

It's important to separate sexual predation from a paraphilia from an honest human sexual or emotional attraction, and realize that they are not always related, if at all. A person has who is emotionally or sexually attracted to such a person must be evaluated as a function of their intent or motivation, not solely on the fact of diminished mental capacity of the person they are pursuing.

Vlad/Igor
  #17  
Old 07-06-2004, 08:06 PM
samclem samclem is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Revtim
I've heard of a person like this; I think she prefers to simply be called "Laura Bush."



I know you said no jokes; I'm very sorry.
Revtim. You're a longtime poster, so no need to beat you senseless here.

Let's try to keep politics and bad taste jokes out of GQ.

samclem GQ moderator
  #18  
Old 07-06-2004, 08:15 PM
Askia Askia is offline
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Time for a neologism, I think. I'm going to include these suggested new words in my neologism thread.

For the sake if this definition, we'll assume an emotional/physical attraction that has nothing to do with sexually predatory behavior -- admmittedly hard as that may be for many to grasp.

Let's see.. how about...

hypocognitophilia
(roughly translated, hypo is "below" + cognit is "think" + philia is "love")

Or possibly:

paraparphilia
(.. para is "almost" and "par" means "equal")

Try prefix variations using "sub", "hemi", or possibly "ex" instead.
  #19  
Old 07-06-2004, 08:40 PM
Revtim Revtim is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by samclem
Revtim. You're a longtime poster, so no need to beat you senseless here.

Let's try to keep politics and bad taste jokes out of GQ.

samclem GQ moderator
I am indeed sorry, I should have tried harder to resist.....
  #20  
Old 07-06-2004, 08:52 PM
rkts rkts is offline
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"Hypocognitophilia" is pretty good. I don't like "paraparphilia". Too ambiguous, and too many p's.

How about...

dysencephalophilia?

retromentophilia?
  #21  
Old 07-06-2004, 09:50 PM
PaulFitzroy PaulFitzroy is offline
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So is there any way that a mentally normal person could have a meaningful relationship with a retarded person? Or would only a relationship between two mentally handicapped people be considered "kosher?"
  #22  
Old 07-06-2004, 09:53 PM
Paul in Qatar Paul in Qatar is offline
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Everyone knows the US Marine's charity is the annual Toys for Tots campaign. The American Army does a poor job of letting the world know it supports the Special Olympics.

I was a young captain at Fort Leonard Wood when the SO rolled into town. All of us soldiers did all we could to make it happen. I happened to be at some sort of field day.

I have lived a sheltered life and have rarely encountered mentally retarded (is that offensive? Challenged, whatever) people. So I hung out with some parents to learn more about it.

One of these parent's daughter was stunning. Supermodel beautiful. Of course a lot of seventeen year olds are.

In any case the young lady was quite subnormal. Shockingly so. Outgoing, friendly and without emotional defenses.

I have wondered and worried about her since. He folks had done a good job of protecting her. But on the other hand, surely a loving family of her own would be the best protection for her in the long-term.

If biology prevents her from enjoying a job, most hobbies and much of what gives me so much joy, must we also prevent her from having other pleasures in her life?

I don't know. I will follow this thread to see what you folks think.
  #23  
Old 07-06-2004, 10:56 PM
Askia Askia is offline
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If a person has demonstrable diminished mental capacity but does not otherwise appear "mentally challenged" or have any other physical disability, I would suspect traumatic brain injury as opposed to birth defect. I don't think Special Olympics disqualifies this type of retardation.

Paul in Saudi. You make a couple of interesting points. May I share?

I have two cousins -- both male -- with different types of diminished mental capacity. My younger cousin Shawn (27) was born with cerebal palsy and also has some physical challenges walking and holding things. My older cousin Junior (early 60s) was born of normal intelligence, but was savagely beaten by unknown assailants when he was a teenager (late 1960s). He was hospitalized for a number of weeks and came home with some motor skill loss, severe language loss & speech impairment (stuttering).

Now Junior grew up in a poor black southern urban neighborhood in Charleston, SC. He was an athlete in high school, never a star but reasonably good, with a good strong body and middling looks. Now, I've never asked my grand-aunts specifically, but my understanding from listening to family gossip is that Junior has fathered at least two children by women who've taken advantage of him when he walks around the neighborhood. (Ex-girlfriends and admirers in the neighborhood who still flirt with Junior who mysteriously ended up pregnant with kids, now my age, who looked just like him.) Junior lost his right eye in the attack and used to wear an eyepatch. I understand that the reason he never wore one when I was growing up is because his sisters made him take it off so the neighborhood women would leave him alone. (Now he refuses to wear one.)

I think my own natural sense of caution and cynicism would prevent me from supporting someone of so-called normal intelligence who professed to 'love' a person of impaired mental capacity. I'm not sure it occurs for reasons other than lust and or control.

In Shawn's case, he lives in an assisted care development and brags that he has about three or four girlfriends. Now in his case, I'd feel a lot better if he did end up married or something.
  #24  
Old 07-06-2004, 10:57 PM
Kel Varnsen - Latex Division Kel Varnsen - Latex Division is offline
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Why are people having debates about mentally retarded people and relationships? Isn't there another forum for discussions of this kind? This forum being for factual answers.
  #25  
Old 07-06-2004, 11:25 PM
samclem samclem is offline
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Kel. For once(don't let it go to your head--it's just this once), I'm gonna agree with you.

The OP has been asked and answered about as well as we can expect.

If anyone has further issues about morality, etc. , please start a thread in the appropriate forum.

Closed.

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