Huh? ::repeat:: Huh? ::repeat again:: Huh? Fuck you!

The BBQ Pit
1

What the fuck is it with you people? You have to answer everything with a “huh?” Why must you force me to repeat everything I say? Is this some kind of game?

I start to say something and you automatically interject a “huh?” I’m half way through saying something and you interject a “huh?” I’ve completed a statement and you automatically say “huh?”

Why do I have to fucking repeat myself three times because you are too fucking lazy to listen the first time???

You don’t have a fucking hearing problem and I don’t have any fucking problem speaking clear English. If I said, “I heard Sue fucked Joe the boss in the janitor’s closet” you’d have no problem hearing that at a whisper from 20 feet away. I know. I’ve tested it on you, you Mother-Fucker.

I’ve even started using a warning, “so, um, ok, so anyway, I’m about to say something, um…” Yet even when I’ve gotten your attention you still reflexively come back with “huh?”

Why do you have to answer everything with, “huh?” I’m sick of it. When you say “huh” I remain silent. Engage your brain asshole. Replay in your mind what I just said, I know it’s there. But still I get, “huh? What did you say? No really, I didn’t hear you?” Bullshit. You heard me just fine, fuckwad.

I have a clear speaking voice. Foreigners whose English is their second, third or fifteenthybillyuth language understand me just fine. My significant other has a hearing problem due to a stroke and she hears me just fine (except when she doesn’t want to).

So fuck you and your “huhs?” I’m not repeating myself. You didn’t “hear” it, too fucking bad for you. Start listening, asshole. The world’s not all about you, you stupid fuck.

2

Huh?

3

Surely you’re embarrassed to be shooting fish from a baby’s mouth?

4

I had a friend who did that a lot. Often, she would just reflexively say “huh?” right after I said something. Then a half second later, she would realize that she did hear me, say “Oh…” and respond. I felt like saying, “Why don’t you take a deep breath, clear your mind, and try to actually concentrate on what I just said?” It’s like those people who ask for your phone number, then don’t listen when you give it to them. I’ve had clients at work where I’ve had to repeat a number 3 or 4 times because they are unable to get through the self-chatter in their own minds.

5

what?

6

It’s a power play. You decide to say something. You say it. I say “Huh?” forcing you to repeat what you just said, even though I heard it the first time. It says “I can make you do my bidding just by grunting in your direction. I own you.” Also, it gives me time to think of something to say back to you, ensuring that my response is appropriately witty, interesting and informative. This shows that I’m thoughtful and intelligent while you, by comparison, are a moron who goes around repeating himself for no reason.

7

As long as we’re on the subject, I work with a total of three people, all of whom have been here for years. Whenever one of them (we’ll call him L.) calls me over the intercom, it goes like this:

(Phone speaker, clearly L’s voice) “Uh, Kabong?”

(I pick up phone) “Yes?”

“Kabong?”

(Blood pressure skyrockets) “Yes, it’s me.”

“Kabong, this is L…”

I FUCKING KNOW IT’S YOU!!! YOU’RE THE ONLY FUCKING IDIOT WHO EVER DOES THIS!!!

That last bit only occurs in a thought balloon, unfortunately.

8

My immediate thought upon reading the title was “Oh, you have a kid too?”
LilMiss does this ALL the time. Drives me nuts.

My peeve are the people who just stare blankly at you after you ask them a question. Uh, did you not understand me? Would you like me to repeat the question in a different language? One coworker does this so much I’ve taken to e-mailing her my questions as standing face to face with her and seeing that glazed nobody’s home look makes me want to throttle her.

9

My dad broke us of saying “huh?” at an early age. He would tell us we sounded like a pig that got kicked in the ass. As a result, I can’t stand it when someone says “huh?” within ear shot anymore.

Just sharing, that’s all.

10

I have a coworker who makes me go “huh?” or “pardon?” or “what?” all the damn time. This is because he mumbles.

“You blblblbblb the brrnrnrnrndle?”

  • “Huh?”

“Blblblblbl rlrrnb brrnrenblblb?”

  • “Huh?”

“Blblbllbbll nnkmbbnb … ?”

He actually gets quieter when I ask him to repeat stuff. So now I ask him to repeat once, and if he mumbles, I just ignore him.

11

My mom does this. Her hearing isn’t what it used to be so it is always:

Mom, did you…
HUH?
Mom, did you take…
HUH?

Mom, wait until I finish the sentence. Maybe you can get it from context. Such as, if you hear the words ‘take’ and ‘trash’ you might be able to figure out that I said “did you take the trash out”.

Or, you could go get your hearing checked.

12

I clipped the above just to illustrate how it sounds from my side of a conversation. Some of us just can’t hear very well, if there is enough background noise. In a quiet setting, I hear fine. But, if there is noise, it all runs together and sounds garbled. I can’t filter it all out. If it annoys all of you, try to imagine how frustrating it can be for someone like me.

13

It’s worse when I try to introduce myself.

My name is-
HUH?
My name is-
WHAT?
My name is Slim Shady, dammit!

14

Every so often when I read one of your posts, Steve, I begin to wonder if we were twins separated at birth.

This is one of those times. I have exactly the same problem – I can hear a very faint noise at a substantial distance when it’s quiet, but without lipreading I cannot understand something someone is saying to me from just beyond the “personal space” rule if there’s any significant degree of ambient noise. Some day I want to get gobear alone in a place of great solitude – and that’s not the erotic remark it sounds like; every time he and I have been in a place where we could have a serious real-time conversation, the background noise has been such that I’ve missed half of what he’s had to say, and had to have him repeat it. And I happen to think that gobear has a great deal intelligent and interesting to say that I do want to listen to, and that that must have been immensely frustrating for him as it was for me.

As for the “huh” before complete sentence phenomenon – it may be that your hearer can’t tell that you haven’t put together a complete sentence yet, because he/she can’t freakin’ hear what it is you are saying – that’s the usual reason for requesting a repeat of a statement, after all.

Or, in all cases, it might be that what “Huh?” means is, “I just got word that my mother is dying of terminal cancer, and my wife is suggesting that we go for a trial separation, and I’m not overly confident that I won’t be included in the next round of layoffs, and while I have far more respect for you than to suggest that your discussion of young Jeremy’s soccer game is flat-out boring, I am finding it hard to focus on it for some reason.”

15

I understand that it is frustrating to not be able to tell what people are saying. English is not my husband’s first language, and sometimes when he gets tired he mumbles and I miss words.

That said, may I point out that “huh?” is a particularly unuseful comment? If you can make out anything that I’ve said, please indicate that. Or if it’s too noisy, or you need me to be louder, specify that. For example, “My neighbor’s mowing his lawn; would you mind speaking a bit more loudly?” or “Sorry, I missed the end of that” or “Can you repeat just the last two digits of that phone number” or “What exactly did you want me to shove up my ass?”, and so on. I know it sounds like more work than “huh?”, but it saves time and anguish in the long run of the back and forth huh-repeat cycle.

16

In Germany we are taught as kids that “huh?” is just plain bad manners. We’re told it sounds like a pig grunting. If you didn’t hear or understand something you always wait for the other person to finish, and the you say “Wie bitte?”. Isn’t it considered better manners to say “Excuse me?” in English also?

If someone says “Excuse me?” I will gladly repeat everything I said, but if someone keeps grunting “huh?” at me, I will be peeved.

17

Good point. And sometimes politeness has unexpected benefits. Like at the end of Watergate, when Nixon couldn’t hear clearly what Ford was saying, and politely apologized for not hearing him clearly, saying “Pardon me?”… :wink:

18

I have a very similar problem, and in my case it’s probably neurological and heritable since my little brother has it too. I have a hard time understanding any speech at all when the environment is noisy or I’m tired. I find myself “predicting” what people are going to say and realized some time ago that I probably only hear about a quarter of what is said to me in most contexts, piecing the rest together from context (and occasionally making mistakes, sometimes quite humorously). If you approach me and do not get my attention before talking, I will generally fail to hear the first five words you say to me.

Lectures, especially when good amplification is used, are not nearly as bad (very clear speech, much easier to process), and generally television isn’t bad either (for the same reason, I suspect).

I do better when only one person is speaking in a quiet environment, but even then when I’m tired I’m often very slow to process speech. Processing speech is also very tiring for me and after a long day of a lot of listening I often need two or three hours of peace and quiet to recover. It’s also very hard for me to concentrate on anything else when people are talking around me, probably because speech processing requires more of my attention than it does for most people. I’ve long since learned that I cannot really do much of anything requiring concentration when talking on the phone (other than largely reflexive activities that don’t involve language – so, for example, I can generally drive safely while talking on my cell phone). It’s just too hard to focus on both the conversation on the phone and whatever else I’m trying to do.

19

Sometimes it’s a concentration issue, sometimes not.

I suspect I went through that “Huh?” and “Oh…” routine for years, frustrating countless people, before my partner finally called me on it. “Why do you do that?” she asked me. After thinking about it, I realized that it is due to a slight hearing loss that causes me to lip read more than normal. When you lip read, it is often difficult to tell what specific word the speaker has said. Sometimes there are several possible options that have to be narrowed down depending on the context. Consequently, I would often say “Huh?” because I literally did not hear the speaker but then a split second later, after I figured out the word from the context, I would continue my part of the conversation as if I understood what the person said – which I did, just not from “hearing” it. Having figured it out, though, I would forget why I had said “Huh?” in the first place. I never noticed that I wasn’t hearing as much as I thought I was because my lip reading had gotten quite good without me realizing it.

Anyhow, since my partner pointed out how annoying it was, I make an effort to stop saying “Huh?” or even “pardon?” and give myself a moment to see if the meaning will come clear in a second. Mind you, the slight pause in the pace of conversation and the slightly puzzled look on my face while I quickly try to deduce what someone just said might be equally annoying. If I catch that I’m doing this more than once or twice in a conversation, I just mention my hearing and people are OK with that.

20

I think there’s some truth to this in some cases. I learned this, oddly enough, from watching “Cops” and “court” TV shows like Judge Judy. I’ve noticed that people who aren’t particularly bright, and have done something wrong, when asked a direct question, will either pretend not to hear, or repeat the question, in order to give themselves time to make up a lie.

“Do you have a driver’s license?”
“Do I have a driver’s license?”

Well I’m guilty on that one. Or at least I’ve been accused of it. The thing is, when someone asks me a question, especially a complex one, it might take me a second to think of the answer. Apparently my face goes “blank” (whatever that means) while I’m thinking. This has always puzzled me, as I have encountered a couple people in my life who find this an intense source of irritation. At my worst, I might be thinking for a couple of seconds, which to some people must seem an eternity, judging from their reaction. I’ve always thought it far preferable to actually formulate an answer rather than instantly begin jabbering before I’ve even thought about what I’m saying. But apparently a lot of people actually prefer the latter.

Yeah, I guess there are 2 camps: Those who are annoyed when you say “huh” without taking time to process whether you did in fact understand (and if you’re lip reading or getting it from context, you still can take time to figure it out, as you learned to do), and those who are annoyed when you don’t INSTANTLY respond. I’m definitely in the first camp. I’d rather wait a couple seconds for a cogent response than get a “huh?” right away every time.

I suppose it’s possible that my friend has a hearing problem, but I suspect it’s more the result of just general nervousness. She also has a really annoying habit of saying “uh huh” constantly. I know it’s good to acknowledge the other speaker occasionally with a “yes” or “uh huh” or “right”, but she does it every few words, to the point where it’s so distracting that I begin to lose concentration on what I’m saying.

And I’m just curious, those of you who say you have hearing loss: why wouldn’t a hearing aid help?