Password Togetherness

[Felinecare]

Once upon a time, I was helping my then-75 year old father set up his e-mail account (over the phone). Yes, it was AOL.

So I explain he and Mom can have individual screenames, and individual passwords. I jokingly tell him to keep his password a secret from everybody, including Mom.

Well! You would have thought I'd suggested celebrating the new computer purchase with hookers and crack. Not only was the password shared, but neither would dream of going online without checking each other's e-mail, this being totally expected and approved of by each other.

So did my parents live together too many years?(36 until Dad's death). Do you and your spouse/SO share passwords? Check each other's e-mail (knowingly, that is!) Or would you consider it an invasion of privacy?

[Junior Spaceman]

That reminds me - I have to check my girlfriend's email.

[AuntiePam]

I'd consider it an invasion of privacy. If hubby starts showing any interest in e-mail, we'll have separate passwords.

I will, of course, help him get his password set up and make sure everything's running properly.

[Jophiel]

Well, my girlfriend knows my password and I know hers, but then again, I was around when she got her new account so I stood there as she told the lady over the phone what password she wanted. She has mine because occassionally, her old NetZero account would refuse to work and so I'd let her use my account to check her mail (Hotmail).

We don't touch each other's mail though. Mine is through a POP server and it'd be amazingly obvious if new mail magically showed up in my account. I don't know her Hotmail password.

On the other hand, I doubt she wants to read my listservs and I know I don't want to read her mountains of "newsletters" (I call them spam) from Gameworld.com, IGN.com and whatever else she subscribes to.

[Ringo]

I've gone about 4 years now sharing an email account (primary one for both of us) with my business partner. She's seen a few doper emails, and I see what she's getting. Two of my sisters-in-law and one of my nieces send me lots of (often ribald) jokes and, although they don't know my partner, whenever we split the email account sheets, I'm going to recommend they keep her on their circulation lists (she enjoys'em more than I do - must be a gal thing).

It really hasn't been a problem, despite both of us receiving a few rather personal emails. I think it depends a lot on the relationship of the people involved.

[JavaMaven1]

My BF and I have an AOL account where we have separate screennames, but our passwords are held so we don't have to type it each time--so we could go onto each other's accounts if we wished... but we don't.

Sometimes he looks over my shoulder while I'm on the computer, just as I do to him... but, I don't have a need to "check up on him".

[tygre]

My hubby and I share a business account, which we both read, plus we have our own personal accounts, which we keep private for the most part.

He knows my password, mainly because I haven't changed it in 4 years!!!

--tygre

[kunilou]

Not only do Mrs. Kunilou and I have the same account and password, but we gave the kids all the same password so everyone can check anyone's mail. We also taught them the same rule you have at work -- if you don't want anyone else to read it, don't put it in writing.

Of course, the missus and I have separate work accounts, so if we want to plan a surprise party or something like that, we can always do it from the office.

[Edwardina]

My sweetie knows my ATM pin number, but not the password for my e-mail account. Some things are sacred!

[Drain Bead]

Brian and I know one another's passwords. Hell, I was the one who changed his password during the whole hacker incident. He just sat on the bed and told me what he wanted it changed to.

We don't actually USE them, though. At least, not anymore. He learned that one the hard way. I would never dream of going into any of his personal online things for any reason other than emergencies.

[SuaSponte]

Originally posted by Edwardina
My sweetie knows my ATM pin number, but not the password for my e-mail account. Some things are sacred!

Hmm, so Mr. Ed can't see this, huh? Edwarina, I'd love to meet you in a hotel room and .... What? She said "e-mail"?! Ya mean Mr. Ed can read this? Ackk, err, hmm, I'd like to meet you in a hotel room and sell you Tupperware products.
Sua

[tshirts]

And we do often ask each other to check if we have any email, because we work together. Of course we don't often read anything from each other's friends, but it's no big deal if we do.

Just like in the olden days, everything private comes by real mail or phone, so of course we all know when messages arrive and who from.

[TheThill]

Obviously, it would depend on whether the relationships are open and trusting or secretive.

[Edwardina]

Originally posted by SuaSponte
Hmm, so Mr. Ed can't see this, huh? Edwarina, I'd love to meet you in a hotel room and .... What? She said "e-mail"?! Ya mean Mr. Ed can read this? Ackk, err, hmm, I'd like to meet you in a hotel room and sell you Tupperware products.
Sua [/b]

I appreciate the thought, Sua, but I already have all the Tupperware I need. Thanks anyway!

I'll keep you in mind if I ever need any more . . . plastic kitchenwear . . . I mean "ware."

[Tark]

I don't know my wife's password, and she doesn't know mine. Not that we have been trying to keep them secret from each other, it's just worked out that way. She has her own system, I have my system, we're both hooked up to DSL, and that's just the way it is.

Am I worried about stuff she might be getting that I don't know about? No. If I ever felt she was hiding something from me, we'd have more problems than just not knowing each other's passwords.

I trust her, she trusts me. I tell her everything, she does the same.

It works out nicely.

[handy]

Yeah, I do. She usually calls back saying I never gave it to her because it's mysteriously not on the puter no more.

I have to give it through the phone. Can you imagine? I gave it to her four times on the phone one time & she said she didnt get it. Cause when they are like say, '8way(@' how are you going to get THAT to someone on the phone by saying it?

[Myrr21]

I'd say it's an issue of trust and how protective you are of your space. Originally, I was very resistant to (now ex) GF knowing my password. Since then, have actuallt given it to her cause the computer I was on wouldn't work so I couldn't check mail. She's also given me hers, although I think she's forgotten about this and doesn't realize I know it. Of course, she guessed my ATM PIN on the first try, so...

[Lazarus7]

I work as a network consultant and network security is a pet peeve of mine! I do not know my wife's password and she does not know mine. We have some communal passwords for things we share responsibilites for (our domain for example, or our business email) in much the same way that we share house and vehicle keys.

I even lock my Win2K server and my NT workstation when I am not on them even though she is the only person who could access them.

MDE

[handy]

Yep, no counting what a woman or a child can do to your setup.

[Myrr21]

Then again, half the time it's the child fixing the setup (at least for those with no idea how to handle a computer). For the rest of us...true enough, but then again, there's no telling what I'll do to my CPU when it's 4 in the morning and my brain ain't quite workin' right.

[winky99]

Even if my GF knew my password, she wouldn't know what to do with it. If it's not typing in MSWord she doesn't know how to do it.

[Byzantine]

I had a friend that took it into her head to get into my e-mail while I was out of town. My home PC is set up so I don't need to enter my password each time and she was watching the house and I guess decided to check it out.

Anyway, I found out about it and hit the roof. Not that she "found" out anything I wouldn't tell her but it was just as rude as reading through my journal. I changed my home PC set up and changed all my passwords.

I think e-mail is just as private as other mail. If you and your SO are okay with this than that's great for you but I like my privacy.

[JimmyNipples]

My wife knows all my passwords and PIN numbers. I, however, no nothing of my wife's numbers.

I was taught growing up, that you NEVER look inside a woman's purse. It even freeks me out if I have to move a purse off a chair or something....or if someone asks me to hand them their purse.

This belief has carried over from purses to PIN's I guess.

Now, lets stop talking about this...I'm breaking a sweat.

[Dumbguy]

I don't date girls who use computers. One geek per relationship please.

[pepperlandgirl]

I've always known my BF's passwords, he knows mine.
I read his emails all the time, I assume he reads mine. We share an account and PIN number. I have one password for everything, as does he, so it's not a big mystery. I suppose I'd be less inclined to read his stuff if he A) Cared and B) ever got anything interesting. But all he ever gets is junk mail, so it's not a big deal.