So I stopped by the pub toninght. It wasn’t very crowded so me and the bartender spent a lot of time just talking to each other.
The bartender herself is very well endowed upstairs. Not only that, but she was wearing a low cut top with that body glitter stuff sprinked generously accross her breast region…
So I’m talking to this girl, making a geniune conscious effort to look her in the eye as I’m talking to her. The only problem was, as I’m talking to her, I kept getting this shimmer out of the corner of my eye commanding me to look down towards her “girly” region from which the body glitter was emminating.
Now let me tell you something: It’s hard enough even WITH OUT the body glitter to maintian eye contact when you ladies are wearing the low cut tops. But FCOL when you put the glitter on; all bets are off!!
Jeez!! I’m just a man fer christ sake!
So anyway, I guess I took one stare too many or I took one stare too long because this girl actually had the nerve to tell me: “Um, SHAKES. My eyes are up here.” (points to her face)
Pbbbts!! This is CLEARLY her fault!!
*disclaimer: In case it isn’t obvious, this thread was meant to be taken in good humor.
i think it’s damned serious, brother.
i’m not sure what it is, but people want to put on airs. people want to look one way and then be treated differently. for example, you have your stereotypical white-guy-dressing-like-a-black-guy, but he wants to be taken seriously in a place of business (where he works, mind you) and gets upset when he can’t dress the way he wants to.
very shitty example, i know.
i suppose the woman analogy would be better, although this particular time and place is dicey (i almost said it was sticky). this bartender makes good tips, and i’m sure she wears the cleavage shirt and the glitter to get that attention to make more money. nothing wrong with that. you were just talking to her as a civilian or as a friend, not as a patron. that cleavage wasn’t meant for you.
for the girl on the street, though. if you don’t want a guy looking at it, then cover it up/don’t put loads of attention towards it.
she did this because of her occupation, not even because of the attention.
I’m a woman, and I agree with it totally. If you want people looking at your boobs, wear your low cut tops and shake those puppies. Bring a little joy to the world. But if you’re going to get offended every time someone’s eyes stray south of your face as you’re jiggling past (or every time someone pipes up with “Hey, I can see nipples!”. Yes I’m talking to you, girl in the city who jiggled past with aureolas a-showin’ over her ahem “neckline” and all and then got offended when I pointed it out), then you need to put 'em away.
I’d say it’s a given that Chesty Larue wants some attention. There’s sport in that situation: when a woman does everything but hold your head to her chest and then gets pissed when you complement the librarian across the bar, in the darkly lit corner, wearing 3 layers of clothing and no makeup.
Yeah, I’ve never had patience for the ladies who go to great lengths to show off what they’ve got…and then act like Gorgons when they catch you looking.
Actual exchange between me and one Hideous Gorgon at a bar:
I’m at a table with two buddies. There is a table of attractive ladies nearby, at which we are directing quite a bit of attention. One of these ladies is wearing a low-cut blouse. She is amply gifted. I suppose she caught us looking a few times and took umbrage with us. She walks up to our table and:
Hideous Gorgon: Do you see something you like?
(I should add that this was not coy, nor was it sarcastic. It was openly, drunkenly hostile. It was nasty. Fuck her.)
Me: No, and if you don’t like us looking you can stuff those puppies under a sweatshirt. Beat it.
(Then I made sure smoke got in her face. Ah, college.)
I never got my invitation to the Girls Club™. It must have got lost in the mail. But I was wondering, those girls who do put the sweater puppies on display, then get all “Don’t you stare at my boobs!” when people’s eyes wander where they are wont to do, are they playing some kind of power game? It’s always seemed kind of head-trippish to me. Like waving a piece of string in front of a cat’s nose, then smacking it on the head when it gives an experimental bat at the wiggly thing you’re wiggling at it.
Reminds me of the Simpsons episode where Carmen Electra asked Homer to look in her eyes instead of at her chest and he quickly responded, “I’ve made my choice.”
I get all the BoyScout credits for not ogling the boobage. Actually, I do ogle quite a bit, but it’s all the region more or less between your two front jeans pockets. Do you notice? (No one seems to. I’m not sure why).
I saw a special on boob surgery and the bar tender said her tips were directly proportional to the amount of tits showing.
My guess is that you had gotten reclassified from a “tip provider” to a “fun conversation” and she wanted you to react as such.
However, the reason guys give better tips to women with something flashing is the same reason that it is impossible to ignore them when they get out, especially after a beer or 12.
So, what you are all saying is that women must wear approved clothing if they don’t want to be objectified?
I’m well past the age of oogling, but I was once quite ooglable. No matter how I dressed, I expected to be treated with respect.
Is there a difference between this and blaming a rape victim because she was dressed provocatively?
Grow up, boys, and look the girl in the eye!
Well, I endeavor to not be caught at it. (Relatively easy, given my chosen ogle-target-area, see above post). To ogle and not be caught at it is a private thing unto one’s self. To ogle and be discernable in doing it is to interact with the female person and, pardon me, but the mere fact that you’re cut as all get-out doesn’t normally translate over into you being good company or anything. Or vice versa. If I’m going to actually break the ice and interact with you flirtatiously, there’s got to be a good reason. Looks ain’t ever gonna be it.
No. In so far as any conversation about cleavage with a bunch of guys can have subtleties, the point here is more subtle. Common sense says to me that you can’t expose a lot of cleavage, dump glitter on it, and then get on a guy’s case for looking. Doing those things draws attention to them. There’s the legal concept of an attractive nuisance…
I’m not offering that as a blank check for ogling or gross behavior. I don’t look too much and I don’t get caught. But I do think a little common sense needs to be applied to this question of etiquette.
OH, come on now. This is hardly the same thing. If you put a big red flashing light along with a big pinty sing towards your breast; I think it’s a little harder to ccritisize a man for taking a peak.
Sure, the girls doing the “lookie here - don’t look, you perv!” are hypocrits. But isn’t hypocrisy the spice of the American sex-life? From my Dutch perspective, there is a LOT of scarcity, danger and damnation surrounding American sex. And who can resist a juicy taboo? Over here it’s just a nice thing you do, or you don’t. Shrug. ….Sometimes I envy you guys across the Pond.
Come on, SHAKES, admit it: her boobs wouldn’t be half as attractive if there was no danger of being caught, right? She’s doing you a favour!