How dishonest does this make me?

[Dinsdale]

After running yesterday, I found a watch on the floor of the locker room.

I picked it up and put it in my bag - at that time I hadn't made up my mind to keep it, but it certainly was a possibility as I didn't immediately turn it in to the health club office, or find pen and paper to post a sign.

(If it matters, both the health club and the locker room are in the basement of a large office building. The locker room is used by people health club members, as well as others who are not members. I used to be a member, but no longer am, using the locker room to change and shower before and after running outside.)

On the way home, I came to the conclusion that I didn't want to keep the watch - for various reasons - and today I turned it in at the health club.

I'm not rushing out to buy sackcloth and ashes, but I'm just wondering how out-of-line my actions/reactions were. What possible factors do you consider significant with respect to the reasonableness/outrageousness of my behavior?

[Qadgop the Mercotan]

Well, it sort of demonstrates that rigorous honesty is not your default setting.

[Dinsdale]

Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan

Well, it sort of demonstrates that rigorous honesty is not your default setting.

LOL!
Can't argue with that, my friend.
And I love the phrasing!

[Indygrrl]

Yeah, it would have been really shitty of you not to turn it in. I'm glad you decided to do so. If you had kept it without at least trying to return it to its owner that is equivalent to stealing.

[Skammer]

Well, you eventually did the right thing. So your initial instinct was less than virtuous, but at least you came around. I guess the ultimate measure of your righteousness would depend on your motives for turning in the watch; i.e. was it closer to "Gee, I probably should have turned this watch in, since it's not mine and the owner is probably looking for it," or "Holy crap, this watch is a total piece of junk, and I have a much nicer watch already." Even if it were the latter, you could have tossed it out the car window, but you didn't.

[Dinsdale]

It's a considerably nicer watch than I wear, but no Rolex.
Maybe $100 or so.

[Kalhoun]

You did the right thing. In slo-mo, maybe...but the right thing nonetheless. Temptation's a bitch, ain't it?

When I get in those situations, I ask myself (out loud, actually), "Do I wanna be THAT guy?" If I have to ask myself that, I invariably "don't" wanna be that guy.

[Shagnasty]

I would say that is worse than some other similar situations. If you found it on the street, I would say it is no big deal because it would be difficult to track the owner down and the owner probably wouldn't know where to look anyway. The fact that it was in a specific indoor location with a central point to turn it in makes this much worse in my opinion. It is quite likely the owner realized it was missing and knew exactly where to go to look for it. The fact that you kept it overnight means that the owner may have looked and given up hope and may never be reunited with it again.

[Indygrrl]

One time I found a brand new dress in the stairwell at work. Someone had evidently dropped it. I had no intention of keeping it, but I did try it on, which may not be entirely ethical.

Right after that I found whose it was and gave it back to her. She had bought the dress to wear to her son's wedding that weekend. Needless to say, she was happy to have it back.

[Dinsdale]

Originally Posted by Shagnasty

The fact that you kept it overnight means that the owner may have looked and given up hope and may never be reunited with it again.

That's a good point. I'll put a sign in the locker room (there is a bulletin board between the sets of doors) saying "xyz watch found on (date) and turned in to health club office."

It is an "athletic" style watch, and there's a good chance anyone using the lockers will use them again in the future. Unless someone was in from out of town (extremely unlikely). Or perhaps the loss of his watch drove him to commit suicide?!

Thanks for the suggestion.

One possibility I had considered, but rejected, was hanging onto the watch and posting a sign with my contact info, so I could have the watch if no one called. Or asking the health club staffer to let me know if no one picked it up. But I guess my guilty conscience just wanted to rid myself of the thing.

[MannyL]

I think it's good that you are returning the watch in the hopes thte owner finds it. I am in somewhat of the same situation

Through a web site that pays you back for shopping from it I was entitled to get a check for what I believe was X at the end of the year. My account showed that it had Y which was a considerable greater amount then X.

I have taken Y and put it in a savings account. If they contact me saying they made an error I will gladly send them the amount in error. If they do not contact me after three years then I will keep the full amount. I will keep the intrest either way

[Omegaman]

I think the fact that you did the right thing is the key . My hat off to you sir ~

[The Flying Dutchman]

Originally Posted by Dinsdale

I'm not rushing out to buy sackcloth and ashes, but I'm just wondering how out-of-line my actions/reactions were. What possible factors do you consider significant with respect to the reasonableness/outrageousness of my behavior?

Reminds me of the old primary school dictum, finder's keepers. I don't believe in guilt or moralizing for others, but you have to admit that it is a good feeling when you are able to help out the other fella. If you really want that watch make sure that you specify a back up claim with the health club valid after three months or so.

I wouldn't be surprised to hear that in many other cultures, keeping a lost personal artifact is perfectly appropriate.

[stuyguy]

Hey, you ultimately did the right thing, so don't sweat it.

But there are side issues here that are worth discussing. If I ultimately wanted to keep the watch if no one eventually claimed it, I would not have turned it in. I would have told the deskperson or manager that I had found a watch, and I will happily return to the rightful owner if he/she can properly identify it. I would have then given them my full contact information. Maybe I would have even posted sign(s), too.*

The point here is that the owner gets first crack at his/her watch. I get second -- not some dubiously honest deskclerk, or manager, or janitor browsing through the lost & found drawer, or even the Goodwill store that may (improbably) wind up with it when they clear out the drawer every couple of years.


* Should anyone doubt my veracity on this point, I recently found on the street a lady's watch probably worth about $200. I immediately put a posting on Craigslist, and taped up about half a dozen signs in the vicinity -- more trouble than most people in my neighborhood would go to. Got a couple of inquiries (including one from a guy who was convinced I was running some kind of scam) but none of them matched the watch I found. Now, could I have turned it into the local police precinct? Sure. Did I? No way! If the owner doesn't claim it, I want my next girlfriend to get it, not the precinct captain's.

[danceswithcats]

Honesty is not unrelated to pregnancy-either you is or you ain't. A positive nod for doing the right thing, albeit delayed.

[Anaamika]

If it had been $10 or $20 I would have less problem with you keeping it. Why? Take for example my watch.

My watch was a brand and type I wanted all my life but my parents refused to let me have it because it was somewhat expensive and they were convinced I would destroy it within 3 minutes of owning it.

Well, it was a luxury purchase for me a few years back, and it was almost discontinued...I bought one of the last ones! So it kind of means a lot to me.

you never know. One person's trash is another another person's treasure, and something that means little to you may mean a lot to another.

of course, I probably wouldn't wear my nice watch to the gym. But you get my drift.

[Cicero]

I think you did the right thing. There is no imperitive for you to hand it in straight away.

I would have been inclined to hang on to it and post a notice rather than hand it in anyway- I'll bet if it isn't claimed it will not be you who ends up with it.

[Runs With Scissors]

I didn't know dishonesty came in degrees.

[Rhiannon8404]

The phrase "better late than never" comes to mind.

[Dinsdale]

Originally Posted by brian_ax

I didn't know dishonesty came in degrees.

Isn't this a mite simplistic?
No distinction between telling your wife you like her new hairstyle, as opposed to having an affair? Never an appropriate application of "situational ethics?"
I freely accept the good doctor's diagnosis that "rigorous honesty may not be my default setting." But hey - at least I'm upfront about my dishonesty! Gotta count for something, no?

[hawthorne]

When you think of others' honesty, you always think of what they would do when there really was no chance of being caught, right?

A number of people have said you did the right thing "eventually". I think you did better than that. You coughed it up before anyone saw. And that counts for a fair bit. Now you've been chewing your own leg off about it you'll do a bit better next time. Soon you'll be saying "but that's less than what you quoted me over the phone, is that a mistake?" and then you'll be fine.

[AskNott]

I've probably encountered this situation a couple of dozen times at work and in real life. If it was something that was identifiable, I turned it in every time, sometimes going so far as to call the owner. Loose cash, though, went right into my pocket. When I swept up empty cigarette packs, I always felt for forgotten joints. I kept those, too.

[TheLoadedDog]

Originally Posted by Dinsdale

Isn't this a mite simplistic?
No distinction between telling your wife you like her new hairstyle, as opposed to having an affair? Never an appropriate application of "situational ethics?"
I freely accept the good doctor's diagnosis that "rigorous honesty may not be my default setting." But hey - at least I'm upfront about my dishonesty! Gotta count for something, no?

I agree with this. I once got handed change of a fifty instead of a five at a McDonalds drive-thru. I couldn't believe my luck, and had started speeding off when I remembered that as far as I knew, the underpaid McDonald's workers are required to pay back any discrepancy in the cash register at the end of the shift, so I went back there and handed it over. That means I'm not purely heartless, but I'm not strictly honest either. If I could have gotten away with $45 from McDonald's general revenue, I'd have done so.

[wnorthr]

Originally Posted by TheLoadedDog

I agree with this. I once got handed change of a fifty instead of a five at a McDonalds drive-thru. I couldn't believe my luck, and had started speeding off when I remembered that as far as I knew, the underpaid McDonald's workers are required to pay back any discrepancy in the cash register at the end of the shift, so I went back there and handed it over. That means I'm not purely heartless, but I'm not strictly honest either. If I could have gotten away with $45 from McDonald's general revenue, I'd have done so.

You also have to admit that if the watch were a Rolex a lot fewer people would be turning it than if it were something worth $100. Honesty definitely comes in degrees.

[Moirai]

Which is kind of sad.

[Nic2004]

You did the right thing in spite of the fact that many would not in the same situation.
High marks.

[Bippy the Beardless]

Watches are often very personal things, even if not particularly expensive. As such it would be really bad not to turn one in that you found.
Wrong change from a casheer is far less a problem, after all errors like that go both ways, and the cash is annonymous values in a buisness money account, not someones 21st birthday preasent from a favorite Uncle.

[bup]

Depends why you turned it in.

You decided not to keep it...for various reasons.

Weird phrasing. Why'd you decide not to keep it?

[Dinsdale]

Originally Posted by bup

Depends why you turned it in.

You decided not to keep it...for various reasons.

Weird phrasing. Why'd you decide not to keep it?

Weird phrasing was intentional, to reflect the fact that my decision-making process was not a simple black/white thing. As was suggested, perhaps the best thing would have been if I picked it up and immediately turned it in or posted a notice. But I admit I did not.

The main reason I eventually turned it in was essentially that returning it was "the right thing to do."
If I had lost it, I would wish it were returned.
And I'd like to think of myself - and have others think of me - as the kind of guy who "does the right thing."
I don't know if it was more that I'd feel good about turning it in, or that I'd feel bad about keeping it.
But I readily admit that it took me more than an instant to reach that conclusion.

OTOH - it was a really nice watch. A much better version of the cheap watch I wear. With a whole bunch of functions I would use regularly while running.
I tried it on - it felt REALLY good.
But I think it was also part of a heart rate monitor set-up, so the guy who lost it presumably had the strap part that would be useless without the watch,
And since it was in the locker room I frequent, there's a chance I might know the guy, at least recognize him.
Wouldn't have been a consideration had I found it on the street.
It crossed my mind whether I would be able to wear/enjoy it with the possibility that someone in the locker room might see it and suspect that it was his.
But I considered if it was sufficiently anonymous, or if waiting a while would lessen the chances of that happening.
And even tho my current watch is a cheap old thing, it does what I need, so I didn't really NEED the other watch.

All of those thoughts and probably some others crossed my mind in the 2-3 hours between my lunchtime run and the train trip home.

[bup]

Originally Posted by Dinsdale

The main reason I eventually turned it in was essentially that returning it was "the right thing to do."

Then I'd say you're mainly honest. If turning it in was about morals, or his feelings, rather than you deciding you didn't want it afterall, then yeah, that's honest.

You never really decided to keep it, either - only decided to delay the decision.

[Auntbeast]

My husband lost a rolex watch while playing paintball. That was about 18 years ago. It is still one of his biggest regrets.

My mother lost a watch when she was on vacation. Every watch she had since, did not measure up to her "perfect watch." Every so often, I would check ebay to see if anything even similar came up. Years I have been doing this. One day, I log in, do a search, and with 7 minutes left to go, there is THE watch. I ended up buying what was originally about a $1500 watch for less than $20 with shipping.

The first jewelry gift my husband gave me was a Seiko kinetic watch. I will repair it until I die.

It may have just been a neato watch to you. But watches are very often, sentimental items. Thank you for returning it, for whatever reasons.

I hope karma brings you a new shiny watch in a GOOD way.

[wnorthr]

Originally Posted by Auntbeast

I hope karma brings you a new shiny watch in a GOOD way.

But Karma doesn't have hands!

[Madd Maxx]

Originally Posted by wnorthr

But Karma doesn't have hands!

Duh, it could be a digital watch.