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  #51  
Old 12-30-2006, 07:42 AM
Princhester Princhester is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chowder
Oh really?

Well just ask who won the world conker championship and also the world marbles championship.

Go on, ask!
No. Shan't. Hah.
  #52  
Old 12-30-2006, 08:16 AM
rayh rayh is offline
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How about "All your oil wells belong to us"?
  #53  
Old 12-30-2006, 08:29 AM
matt_mcl matt_mcl is offline
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I think my favourite state motto is the Isle of Man's, Quocunque jeceris stabit: "Whithersoever thou throwest it, there shall it stand." It gives the image of a game of Isle of Man-tossing.
  #54  
Old 12-30-2006, 08:57 AM
Beware of Doug Beware of Doug is offline
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We are a stupider America than the America of 1956. Therefore we absolutely do need a stupider motto. I propose:
In Us We Trust, or
You Can't Spell Jesus Without U.S.
  #55  
Old 12-30-2006, 09:41 AM
Fear Itself Fear Itself is offline
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"You fucked up-- You trusted us!"
  #56  
Old 12-30-2006, 10:27 AM
xenophon41 xenophon41 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayh
How about "All your oil wells belong to us"?
"US burning your dog!"
  #57  
Old 12-30-2006, 10:27 AM
Revtim Revtim is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayh
How about "All your oil wells belong to us"?
Or maybe "I'm in ur country killing ur doodz"
  #58  
Old 12-30-2006, 10:30 AM
chowder chowder is offline
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Almost forgot......and The World Tiddlywinks Championship.


So go Merkins, beat that iffn ya can
  #59  
Old 12-30-2006, 11:32 AM
LouisB LouisB is offline
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Our God is Stronger than Your God: Everyone of whatever religious persuasion can delude themselves into believing their particular God is the referenced stronger God while all the other jerk-off Gods don't count for shit.
  #60  
Old 12-30-2006, 11:35 AM
Ponder Stibbons Ponder Stibbons is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrifel
Is it once again time to safeguard ourselves with a new, even stupider motto?
Yes.

And since, as noted above, we have a tradition of "testing out" new mottoes on coinage before making them official, I'd like to propose the following New Motto Coin.
  #61  
Old 12-30-2006, 11:39 AM
tomndebb tomndebb is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beware of Doug
You Can't Spell Jesus Without U.S.
If some loon picks this up and I begin seeing this on bumper stickers, I'm stealing a packet of them and coming to your house to plaster your windows with them.

yeeesh! Do you have to give the zealots and bigots ideas? (Or SHUDDER have you actually seen this already?)
  #62  
Old 12-30-2006, 12:01 PM
Boyo Jim Boyo Jim is offline
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I gotta throw in with the "America -- Fuck Yeah!" folks. It's just too perfect.
  #63  
Old 12-30-2006, 01:09 PM
Captain Amazing Captain Amazing is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tomndebb
In the middle of the nineteenth century, there was a mad drive by a few loons to make (Protestant) Christianity the "true" religion of the U.S. (Constitution be damned) to make sure that those horrible Catholic immigrants did not get any wild ideas that they might be welcome. The only result of their failed effort was that, in the midst of the Civil War, someone talked the Treasury Secretary into having "In God We Trust" placed on U.S. coins.
Technically, the Treasury Secretary that put "In God We Trust" on coins was one of those horrible Catholics, himself...Salmon P. Chase. It doesn't look like the spirit behind slogan was really anti-Catholic sentiment. The originator of the idea seems to be a Baptist minister from Pennsylvania, the Rev. Mark Watkinson. Watkinson wrote Chase a letter, excerpts are as follows:

Quote:
One fact touching our currency has hitherto been seriously overlooked. I mean the recognition of the Almighty God in some form on our coins.

You are probably a Christian. What if our Republic were not shattered beyond reconstruction? Would not the antiquaries of succeeding centuries rightly reason from our past that we were a heathen nation? What I propose is that instead of the goddess of liberty [which was on US coins at the time] we shall have next inside the 13 stars a ring inscribed with the words PERPETUAL UNION; within the ring the allseeing eye, crowned with a halo; beneath this eye the American flag, bearing in its field stars equal to the number of the States united; in the folds of the bars the words GOD, LIBERTY, LAW.

This would make a beautiful coin, to which no possible citizen could object. This would relieve us from the ignominy of heathenism. This would place us openly under the Divine protection we have personally claimed. From my hearth I have felt our national shame in disowning God as not the least of our present national disasters.
So, in response, Chase, who was pretty religious himself, wrote a letter to the director of the mint, saying:

Quote:
Dear Sir: No nation can be strong except in the strength of God, or safe except in His defense. The trust of our people in God should be declared on our national coins.

You will cause a device to be prepared without unnecessary delay with a motto expressing in the fewest and tersest words possible this national recognition.
The director of the mint suggested two possible slogans, either "Our Country; Our God", or God; Our Trust"
  #64  
Old 12-30-2006, 01:15 PM
Captain Amazing Captain Amazing is offline
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I need to correct my previous post. In it, I said that Secretary of the Treasury Chase was a Catholic. He was not. He was an Episcopalian. He was also the only cabinet secretary to be named after a fish.
  #65  
Old 12-30-2006, 01:48 PM
tomndebb tomndebb is offline
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I suspect that the fact that a nation of fairly religious people found themselves in a horrendous war made the idea of placing a religious motto on coins a acceptable idea and I do not think that Chase was ever connected to the "Protestant Christian" country movement.

I have read, somewhere, that Watkinson was an active member of the National Reform Association, (then known (until 1875) as The National Association to Secure the Religious Amendment to the Constitution), but I cannot find that connection documented, now, so I am willing to withdraw that claim until I can find a citation for it. In its place I would leave the much weaker claim that a number of Protestant Christians were embracing the idea of changing the Constitution to make it a Protestant document and that such a spirit might have influenced Watkinson, (leaving Chase out of that discussion, completely).
  #66  
Old 12-30-2006, 01:51 PM
rayh rayh is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Boyo Jim
I gotta throw in with the "America -- Fuck Yeah!" folks. It's just too perfect.
Shouldn't that be "America -- Fuck You"?
  #67  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:02 PM
tomndebb tomndebb is offline
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Ah! I have found the connection, (and I am willing to ackowledge that the source may contain just a touch of bias).

While Watkinson wrote the letter inspiring Chase, the National Reform Association connection was not (necessarily) Watkinson, but the director of the mint, James Pollock, whom Infidels claims was an NRA member.

Interestingly, this source muddies the water, a bit. According to the NRA, they were organized in 1861 (which would have coincided both with the appointment of Pollock and the letter of Watkinson). However, the Jon G. Murray article on Infidels claims that the NRA was founded in 1863, meaning that while there may have been a general movement to "Christianize" the U.S. at the time of the letter and coin decisions*, it would not actually have been possible for the organized group to have participated in that action.

* (Regardless whether the founding was 1861 or 1863, it seems unlikely that an organization could have been created had there not been a general movement and exchange of ideas that preceeded it.)
  #68  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:08 PM
Freddy the Pig Freddy the Pig is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayh
Shouldn't that be "America -- Fuck You"?
No, and Fuck Anyone who says it should be.

America -- Fuck Yeah. Just try having malaise when that's your motto.

Concerning "In God We Trust", that dweeb Francis Scott Key thought it was our motto as long ago as 1812:
Quote:
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust."
His phrasing is even worse, combining the backward construction with the passive voice.
  #69  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:13 PM
Boyo Jim Boyo Jim is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rayh
Shouldn't that be "America -- Fuck You"?
No. We are talking about the lyrics of the theme music to "Team AmericaL World Police".

Though your version wouldn't be a bad alternate, at internayional sporting events like the Olympics, for instance. The American spectators could use it against any and all opposition teams.
  #70  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:23 PM
Charlie Tan Charlie Tan is offline
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Snafu?
  #71  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:36 PM
Zakalwe Zakalwe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Amazing
I need to correct my previous post. In it, I said that Secretary of the Treasury Chase was a Catholic. He was not. He was an Episcopalian. He was also the only cabinet secretary to be named after a fish.
Is there no end to the ignorance?
  #72  
Old 12-30-2006, 02:46 PM
Fish Fish is offline
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Some more suggested mottos for a stupider America:

"American Enjenuity"

"Vive l'America"

"This Coin Is Probably Not Counterfeit"

"Any Resemblance Between America And A Democracy Is Purely Coincidental"

"America, Where All Our Dollar Bills Have Trace Amounts of Cocaine"

"If You're Not With Us You're With Somebody Else Who May Or May Not Be With Us"

"John 3:16"

"You Want Fries With That?"

"Here, Have Some More Pollution!"

"Debt Before Dishonor"

"Doing The Right Thing When All Other Options Have Been Exhausted"
  #73  
Old 12-30-2006, 03:12 PM
Evil Captor Evil Captor is offline
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Oooh, how about this:

There's the right way, the wrong way -- and the American way!

(Which is much like the wrong way, only with more sparklies on it.)
  #74  
Old 12-30-2006, 04:15 PM
Freddy the Pig Freddy the Pig is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Terrifel
Legislators also remarked favorably on its weirdly bass-ackwards phrasing, "which calls to mind the speech of a comical Chinaman, or of some type of puppet from a science fiction serial of some kind."
Nowadays, of course, we wouldn't use such a culturally insensitive simile. Instead, we would say that it sounds like Yoda.
  #75  
Old 12-30-2006, 05:25 PM
Charlie Tan Charlie Tan is offline
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"May contain nuts"
  #76  
Old 12-30-2006, 05:35 PM
betenoir betenoir is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MEBuckner
Canada's motto is A Mari Usque Ad Mare, "From Sea to Sea" (which they obviously stole from us). The motto of Quebec is Je me souviens, French for "I remember" (or as I always like to say, it's Canadian French for "Fergit, hell!")
Thank you. Obviously I'm not from Quebec .

Charlie Tan, I like that last one.
  #77  
Old 12-30-2006, 05:45 PM
Larry Borgia Larry Borgia is offline
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How about "We apologize for the inconvenience."
  #78  
Old 12-30-2006, 05:47 PM
Plynck Plynck is offline
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We need an advertising slogan to remind us that America's business is business.

"We are Professional Grage."

"Think Different. Not too much, though..."

"This isn't your Grandfather's America!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Amazing
He was also the only cabinet secretary to be named after a fish.
Before or after he was appointed?
  #79  
Old 12-30-2006, 06:01 PM
Kimstu Kimstu is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. Amazing
I need to correct my previous post. In it, I said that Secretary of the Treasury Chase was a Catholic. He was not. He was an Episcopalian. He was also the only cabinet secretary to be named after a fish.
You forgot Ulysses S. Grant's Secretary of State.
  #80  
Old 12-30-2006, 06:04 PM
The The The The is offline
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Oh dear, too many good ones!

America - Fuck YEAH! is great, however I would like to submit a more 'hip' alternate. "America-Hells Yeah!" Could resonate with the youth, but runs the risk of being embarassingly unhip in a few years.

Or Drewbert's "Trust us; we know what we're doing." could be Jack Bauer'd up as, "We don't have to me to explain, you're going to have to trust us!". . .a bit wordy, but will perhaps save a great deal of time at the U.N.
  #81  
Old 12-30-2006, 06:06 PM
The The The The is offline
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Originally Posted by The The
Oh dear, too many good ones!

America - Fuck YEAH! is great, however I would like to submit a more 'hip' alternate. "America-Hells Yeah!" Could resonate with the youth, but runs the risk of being embarassingly unhip in a few years.

Or Drewbert's "Trust us; we know what we're doing." could be Jack Bauer'd up as, "We don't have to me to explain, you're going to have to trust us!". . .a bit wordy, but will perhaps save a great deal of time at the U.N.

"We don't have TIME to explain, you're going to have to trust us!".
  #82  
Old 12-30-2006, 08:05 PM
saoirse saoirse is offline
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I thought "He who smelt it dealt it" would be a better motto. I've actually thought about this before.

I was under the impression that "Advance Australia" had been changed to "Australia to King's Bishop Four" in the early 70s.
  #83  
Old 12-30-2006, 08:34 PM
RickJay RickJay is offline
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Consider the possibilities that would be opened up by having Mr. T on all the currency.

Then, of course, the motto would be "PITYING FOOLS SINCE 1776"
  #84  
Old 12-30-2006, 10:35 PM
Zakalwe Zakalwe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kimstu
You forgot Ulysses S. Grant's Secretary of State.
He may have, but I didn't. Check Post #71.
  #85  
Old 12-31-2006, 12:35 AM
betenoir betenoir is offline
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We Have Always Been at War with Eastasia
  #86  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:11 AM
wonky wonky is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The The
Or Drewbert's "Trust us; we know what we're doing." could be Jack Bauer'd up as, "We don't have to me to explain, you're going to have to trust us!". . .
Or millions of people will die!
  #87  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:23 AM
MEBuckner MEBuckner is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zakalwe
Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain Amazing
I need to correct my previous post. In it, I said that Secretary of the Treasury Chase was a Catholic. He was not. He was an Episcopalian. He was also the only cabinet secretary to be named after a fish.
Is there no end to the ignorance?
Yeah, but he wasn't named after a fish, he was named after fish in general. It's completely different.
  #88  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:39 AM
saoirse saoirse is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by betenoir
We Have Always Been at War with Eastasia
Oh great, so we have to replace all the currency every time we go from being at war with Eastasia to being at war with Eu
  #89  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:47 AM
The Hamster King The Hamster King is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MEBuckner
Yeah, but he wasn't named after a fish, he was named after fish in general. It's completely different.
But what about Edmund Muskie?
  #90  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:58 AM
Diogenes the Cynic Diogenes the Cynic is offline
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I'll pile on for "America, fuck yeah!" I think it kind of sums up the zeitgeist.
  #91  
Old 12-31-2006, 02:27 AM
Talon Karrde Talon Karrde is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drewbert
"Trust us; we know what we're doing."
We ARE the police force.
We don't watch the news, we make it.
Guns don't kill people, we do.
  #92  
Old 12-31-2006, 09:55 AM
Boyo Jim Boyo Jim is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jsgoddess
Or millions of people will die!
That should be "...AND millions of people will die!"
  #93  
Old 12-31-2006, 11:54 AM
Mayo Speaks! Mayo Speaks! is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponder Stibbons
Yes.

And since, as noted above, we have a tradition of "testing out" new mottoes on coinage before making them official, I'd like to propose the following New Motto Coin.
I think the coin should be one of these:

"America: We do not sleep. We wait."
"America's chief export: pain."
"There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures we have allowed to live."

Chuck Norris facts are still funny, dammit!
  #94  
Old 12-31-2006, 12:36 PM
Terrifel Terrifel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponder Stibbons
Yes.

And since, as noted above, we have a tradition of "testing out" new mottoes on coinage before making them official, I'd like to propose the following New Motto Coin.
Ponder Stibbons, did you make that up especially for this thread, or what? That's just awesome.
  #95  
Old 12-31-2006, 12:56 PM
flight flight is offline
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Some of the ones out there are already pretty good.

Austria's old one: "It is Austria's destiny to rule the world" So how did that work out for you?

Botswana: "Rain" I think someone has a problem with the weather there.

Quebec: "I Remember" That sounds seriously stalkerish.

Kenya: "Let's work together" It's like one big hippy commune.

Luxembourg: "We want to stay what we are" Sort of the whiny little kid of mottos.

Scotland: "No one provokes me with impunity" Nice words to say, "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."
  #96  
Old 12-31-2006, 01:01 PM
saoirse saoirse is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flight
Some of the ones out there are already pretty good.
That's handy. It sounds to me like the Isle of Man is the place to go for lawn jarts.
  #97  
Old 12-31-2006, 03:24 PM
Steve MB Steve MB is offline
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Yeah, but how else can we guarantee that the tongue of a Kohm will burn with fire if he dares attempt to say the holy words?
  #98  
Old 12-31-2006, 03:38 PM
Qadgop the Mercotan Qadgop the Mercotan is offline
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Let's just cut to the chase and get our current admin's motto out there:

Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc
(We gladly feast on those who would subdue us)

And the current admin seems to feel that if you're not sucking up to us, you're trying to subdue us. IMHO.
  #99  
Old 12-31-2006, 03:57 PM
Fear Itself Fear Itself is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan
Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc
(We gladly feast on those who would subdue us)
Reminescent of Caligula:

"Oderint dum metuant"
(Let them hate so long as they fear. )
  #100  
Old 12-31-2006, 04:26 PM
Plynck Plynck is offline
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"Badges? We don't need no stinkin' badges..."
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