To all SDMB literatis - I freely admit that this thread has been inspired by the various Eragon threads: if there was a book I’d feel happy throwing onto a bonfire, it’s that one. Help me cleanse the world of literary garbage and join me throwing some books onto the pile, I’ll go and get some petrol and some matches.
Oprah Magazine
I know this is gonna sound very PC, but I don’t think bad books should be burned. One reason is that coming generations might see them in a new light though in many cases it’s doubtful), but we also need the dreck to have something to contrast with the good.
Good point Charlie Tan - to clarify I’m not suggesting that ALL copies of a book should be burned, rather than a single copy of each terrible book should be burned “in effigy” to make clear the displeasure of the literate against it.
Sure, all of Michael Crichtons books would be a good start. Many trees senselessly killed to feed the stands in airports (there’s some faulty logic there, but I’d find enjooyment out of burning books written by Crichton)
The Works of Anne Rand.
Nuff said.
World Fantasy Award winner Thraxis: it was the doom of our nascent bookclub and my humiliation as its selector, and eminently burnable.
Daniel
The Illuminatus! Trilogy.
(Sorry.)
Also, every romance book ever written should be thrown into a bonfire, along with the readers of those books.
I’d be careful if I were you BlackKnight, that ice you’re standing on doesn’t look too thick… :dubious:
Reader’s Digest condensed books.
I actually did this once. I inherited my parent’s collection of these things, and had no room to spare on my shelves. Local nursing homes and libraries didn’t want them, the recycler wouldn’t take them, so we had a fire.
It takes a lot of accelerant to get those things to burn properly. I won’t do it again, but just because it was too messy.
May be I the first to suggest the entire collected opus of Dan Brown ?
I should admit I’ve never actually read anything of his, but once,someone sitting opposite me on a train was reading the Da Vinci Code.
I read possibly 50 words from it, and was physically nauseated at the turgidity of the prose.
I was convinced then, and remain so convinced for all time, that the effort at universal literacy was a serious mistake. Had it not occured, Dan Brown might have remained in his natural aliterate state and the world would have been spared his prose.
The Left Behind books. Not only are they vaguely anti-semitic, poorly written, and insulting to the intelligence of the readers which have any, they’re not even sound eschatology. If they were going to write about the Apocalypse, they could have at least used good Bible scholarship.
Anything by Danielle Steele.
The collected works of Kevin Trudeau, the “Red wine cures cancer!” guy.
Could we throw John Banville on? His Man Booker prize comments pissed me off. He said that it was 'There are plenty of other rewards for middle-brow fiction. There should be one decent prize for real books. It is nice to see a work of art win the Booker prize. ’
Maybe Piers Anthony’s collected works, too.
Add to that: Ayn Rand. 
Dan Brown isn’t the worst author in the world, and whilst the idea in his books aren’t terribly original they are at least entertaining. I would agree that his narrative style is terrible though, and when I started reading Angels and Demons for the first 50 pages I swore I was reading the Da Vinci code again. I don’t know if he’ll write any more Robert Langdon books but I’m willing to bet that they’ll start with him being woken up and told by a stranger to come urgently to the scene of a murder.
I’ll share with you that my brother, who has been a fan of Stephen King since the publication of “Carrie,” threw the latest King novel in the trash after he finished it. Hardcover book, brand new. I don’t know that I’d be able to toss a hardcover book into the trash, but for me, it would be the paperback of “Dreamcatcher,” which I thought was the worst King book I’d ever read. I haven’t read many of his more recent works, trying to save myself the grief I guess. 
I was also not happy with the ending of the Gunslinger series, although my brother said upon re-reading that, he liked it better.
Anne Coulter goes in the fire.
Okay, I’ll settle for her books going in the fire.
I opened this thread with him in mind.
Since I’m here, I’ll pitch in O.J.'s book, when it eventually gets released.
I’d also toss A Million Little Pieces and My [Fake] Friend Leonard on the flames, but the whole controversy was just too entertaining for me to bear them any real ill will.
Anything and everything ever written, produced, directed, said, sold, or done by Rod McKuen.
Mein Kampf
I was going to just post the name and see if anyone got the irony, but I decided to make it clear: you don’t burn books. Bad books will be forgotten, so there’s no need to get rid of them, and once you start burning, then inevitably, good books end up on the top of the pile.