OK, maybe not a joke (setup/punchline) but an Easter one-liner, or witticism, or bad pun, or bon mot of some type. One simple criteria is that it has to be safe for general public consumption (not dirty or sacriligious), though if it’s funny or irreverent, that’s a plus. Help!
What do you get if you pour boiling water down a rabbit hole?
Hot, cross bunnies.
I saw a cartoon once that had two chocolate bunnies, each with a bite missing. The first bunny (with a bite taken out of his rear) says, “My butt hurts!” The second bunny (with ears bitten off) says, “What?”
That’s all I got.
This may be way too long, but it’s my favorite Easter joke.
Three Unitarians just died and are at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter tells them that they can enter heaven if they can answer one simple question.
St. Peter asks the first Unitarian, “WHAT IS EASTER?”
The first Unitarian replies, “Oh, that’s easy, it’s the holiday in November when everybody gets together, eats turkey, and is thankful…”
“WRONG,” replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second Unitarian the same question, “WHAT IS EASTER?”
The second Unitarian replies, “No, Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Santa Claus.”
St. Peter looks at the second Unitarian, shakes his head in disgust, goes to the third Unitarian and asks, “WHAT IS EASTER?”
The third Unitarian smiles and looks St. Pete in the eye.
“I know what Easter is. Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and the disciples were eating at the Last Supper, and He was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by Judas, one of the disciples. The Romans took Him to Pontius Pilate, made Him wear a crown of thorns, and He was hung on a cross. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder. Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out, and if He sees his shadow there will be six more weeks of winter.”
There’s nothing funny about Easter.
How many Easter eggs can you put in an empty basket?
Only one – after that it’s not empty any more!
Well, maybe not. I’m pretty devout and consider Easter the most important, holiest day of the year.
But that doesn’t mean that jokes like the ones here aren’t funny. I especially liked twickster’s joke!
I saw a card once with a cartoon rabbit on the front, looking very stern. He was wearing armor and carrying a sword. The front of the card said "HAND OVER THE CHOCOLATE! And when you opened the card it said “Easter greetings from Atilla the Bun” I wouldn’t send it, but I still got a chuckle out of it.
Q - How does the Easter bunny stay in shape?
A - Hareobics!
Q - Why did the Easter bunny cross the road?
A - To prove she wasn’t chicken!
Q - Why did the Easter bunny cross the road?
A - It was the chicken’s day off.
Q - Why does the Easter bunny have a shiny nose?
A - His powder puff is on the wrong end.
Q - How can you find the Easter bunny?
A - Eggs (x) marks the spot.
Q - Why did the Easter egg hide behind the bush?
A - He was a little chicken.
Q - What did the Easter bunny say to the carrot?
A - It’s been nice gnawing you.
Knock-Knock
Who’s there?
Some bunny.
Some bunny who?
Some bunny is eating my Easter candy!
Q - What did the man say when he saw 10 Easter bunnies hopping down a hill?
A - There go 10 Easter bunnies hopping down the hill…
Q - And, then what did the man say when he saw 10 Easter bunnies hopping down a hill wearing sunglasses?
A - Nothing…He didn’t recognize them.
Q - How does the Easter bunny paint all the Easter eggs?
A - She hires santa’s elves during off-season.
What did Jesus say when he was up on the cross?
“This was one Hell of a way to spend my Easter vacation.”
If a Muslim and a Buddhist were to pass over Easter Island, where would they bury the irony?
Q: What do the Easter bunny and eggs have to do with the Resurrection of Jesus?
A: We’ll start with a discussion of middle eastern fertility cults circa 4000 BCE…
And the old man said to the youngest boy present “Why is this night different from all others?” And the little boy answered, “Because the Easter Bunny comes tomorrow.” And the old man said “Oy. Call my daughter, I think I got off at the wrong bus stop again.”
[del]A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette, with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit pissed off, grabs the sheet, rolls over, and says “Well, I guess we finally answered that question.”[/del]
Nevermind! 
[QUOTE=Hampshire]
What did Jesus say when he was up on the cross?
[QUOTE]
Hey Judas, I can see your house from up here!
Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter.
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Xmas.
Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter.
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs at Christmas.
How does the Easter Bunny keep his coat looking good?
Harespray!
What I don’t get is why Jesus didn’t close the stone door of the tomb - was he born in a barn or something?
Baker, it’s an outtake on a line in Cabaret, in the song Wilkommen.
You know what’s funny about Herrrman? There’s nothing funny about Herrrman!
Easter has been cancelled this year:
They found the body.
The Pope calls together all the cardinals for an important meeting at the Vatican.
“I have some good news and some bad news,” said his holiness. “The good news is … Jesus Christ has returned to earth. In fact, I spoke to him on the phone this morning.”
(The crowd goes wild.)
“Wait,” said the pope. “The bad news is … he was calling from Salt Lake City.”
Hey! There’s no eggs on me! 