Vampires Vs. Atheists.....

Here’s a silly question…

lets assume that Vampires are not actually repelled by Holy Symbols (Crucifix, Star of David, Ankh, etc…) but actually by the wielder’s Belief in the Power of that object…

logically an Atheist holding a Holy Symbol would not be able to repel a vampire, as the Atheist does not believe in the “power” of that symbol, therefore, no effect

however, what if said Atheist held up a copy of “On the Origin of Species” by Charles Darwin, or any of Richard Dawkins’ or Carl Sagan’s works, books the Atheist believes in, or even, lets say, a “Darwin Fish” symbol, would the Vampire be repelled?..

Well, it depends.

In Bram Stoker’s original Dracula, I think it was the symbol itself, and not the faith of the person wielding it, that repelled vampires. In Stephen King’s excellent 'Salem’s Lot, a crucifix was tragically ineffective without faith backing it up (just ask poor Father Callaghan). In George R.R. Martin’s very different but equally excellent Fevre Dream, religious symbols had no effect on vampires at all, regardless of the faith of those trying to use them.

What, you mean you don’t know the old joke whose punchlike is, “Oy, have you got the wrong vampire!”

Since there are no vampires, writers get to make up their own rules. And do, all the time.

That line itself was used in Roman Polanski’s The Fearless Vampire Killers: Or, Pardon Me, But Your Teeth Are In My Neck. I don’t know if it existed as a stand-alone joke before the movie.

In any event, various folks have tackled the question of hpw you’d keep off a Jewish vampire (or a vampire, if you;‘re Jewish). Marvel Comics’ Tomb of Dracula had a Star of David working. Richard Matheson’s I Am Legend had a Torah working. Sometimes it’s the faith of the person wielding ot, sometimes the faith of the vampire (pre-conversion).
So, what could an atheist/agnostic vampire hunter use?

– A Unitarian/Universalist “Light of Faith” symbol

– A copy of the philosophy of Bertrand Russell (or whoever)

–A Copy of the works of Robert Ingersoll (or whoever)

– Any random religious symbol from any religion, past or present (Use a Mithraic lion-headed god! Or an Om!)

–A stake made out of Plastic Wood (Thanks to Larry Niven)

–A light that duplicates solar spectrum.

Worth a try , anyway.

There was an episode of Doctor Who that addressed this point. ( It was one of the crap 7th Doctor stories.) To protect against vampires one needs a strong belief in something, anything at all. A Russian soldier was protected through his unwavering belief in the revolution, while a doubting priest got his throat ripped out.

Of course all writers have their own spin, but in MY vision of vampires, it’s not just “belief” in the symbol, but belief in the protective ability of the symbol. A cross is a powerful magical weapon to a Christian, warding off evil. A Star of David isn’t the same thing to a Jewish person at all - it’s a symbol of their religion, but it’s not a protective symbol. Maybe the Hamesh hand or the Chai would work (The Chai not so much because it’s protective but because it means “life”, something anathema to the vampire.)

Pentacles should work for Wiccans and many neopagans, being protective symbols.

But an atheist - see, here we have a problem. Those books hold truths that (some) atheists believe in, but they are not protective. What’s a protective symbol for an atheist? My best wild guess would be the “No” sign - the circle with the line through it. It’s a powerful talisman that makes people stop doing things. Will it work for a vampire? I’m not sure. You try it, I’ll be over here blessing water and clutching my pentacle.

This will always repel a teenage vampire, who will mistakenly think that you are trying to assign him a book report.

A gun?

Vampire: “Ha ha, you point a gun at me? Do you have silver bullets?”

Atheist: “No, it’s just a gun.”

Vampire: “And how do you imagine this will have an effect on me?”

Atheist: “I do not believe in vampires, I believe you are an ordinary person who’s funny in the head, and as such you will die when I shoot you in the head.”

Vampire: “Ha ha!” <blam> “—Oog.” <thud>

(Richard Benjamin, as the young Van Helsing, stands up and shoots George Hamilton as Dracula with a gun.)

Dracula: What was that?

Van Helsing: A silver bullet. It’s supposed to kill vampires.

Dracula: No! No ! No! That’s werewolves!

Van Helsing: (grasping at straws) Are you sure?
Love at First Bite

Although my 1960s-vintage issues of Famous Monsters of Filmland claimed that a silver bullet fired into a vampire’s coffin would prevent him/her from resting there.

If the protective power of the cross is based on belief, then there’s no reason why an atheist couldn’t use one just as well as a devout Catholic. In fact, one could argue that under this system, the atheist’s belief would actually be better founded. The Catholic believes that he is protected through the grace of the Holy Spirit, but this could be entirely mistaken; as stated above, the power of the cross is a consequence of his own belief, regardless of whether that belief is true or false.

However, the atheist’s belief in the protective power of the cross is based on simple, pragmatic observation. For whatever reason, crosses tend to repel vampires. The atheist will believe this because it works, and it will continue to work for as long as the atheist believes it.

MIKE: “So…Catholicism is a placebo?”

–MST3K Episode 805, “The Thing That Wouldn’t Die”

Hmmm… the closest thing I can think of offhand to an item that embodies a nexus of sincere belief and protection from evil would be a pocket copy of the Constitution…

So if I want to be safe from vampires, I can’t cross my fingers- I need to wander around with a golden apple? That seems unfair.

I’ve had a couple of glasses of wine tonight, so maybe I’m mot following the internal logic of this thread, but…
If it’s an atheist turned to vampire, would the cross be effective?

My thoughts were the same as **Cervaise’**s. I have a firm belief in the protective power of this here .45, and even an atheist vampire would have to respect it. :smiley:

You need the Vampire to believe in it.

You’d better start preparing that speech now if you’d gonna get it up to vampire standard.

Or one of my favorite vampire lines; ’ The vampire said “Comrade, Comrade ! And I thought you would be a good Communist to the end !”, and plucked the cross from his hand. ’

Even better, set up a Nativity display on public property. The atheist vampires will fly directly to the nearest courthouse, in order to demand that the display be removed. But since court is only in session during daylight hours, they’ll be fried to a crisp while they wait for the judge to arrive :smiley:

There was also a 4th Doctor Vampire Episode - State of Decay

I remember something about belief or intense thought or something, but not the details.

Brian
also, other DR. Who Vampireish episodes:

And in the most famous (nowadays) vampire novels of all, by Anne Rice, vampires have no fear of sacred objects. They can see their reflections in the mirror, too. But sunlight fries 'em crispy. At night, your surest bet would be a scythe or sword to cut off the head, which would (in most cases) work – but don’t try it; the vamps are a lot quicker than you. Deer do not fight wolves.