It's called "staffing levels," assholes. Look it up.

[Otto]

Goddammit, today is supposed to be the slow day at work. Instead we've been 30 and 40 calls in queue for over an hour. Almost all of it is overflow from another call center that handles a specific client's rebate cards. That center is chronically understaffed and right now, two months after Christmas is the start of the busy season. My center built ten extra call stations specifically to absorb this overflow with reps that take nothing but this client's calls. How many of those positions are staffed today? Exactly zero.

So of course the long hold times are a license for the callers to be rude little bitches, because yes it is me personally who's making them sit on hold because they're too fucking stupid to figure out that hey, if their cell phone number doesn't activate the card, maybe they should try the other cell number.

[The Flying Dutchman]

Originally Posted by Otto

So of course the long hold times are a license for the callers to be rude little bitches, because yes it is me personally who's making them sit on hold because they're too fucking stupid to figure out that hey, if their cell phone number doesn't activate the card, maybe they should try the other cell number.

But, your the one who begged them to hold and that their call is important to you.

[Mr Bus Guy]

So there's long queues and you're posting here? Shame shame shame.....



Sympathizing and agreeing, but not able to contain the snark

[Otto]

Originally Posted by Mr Bus Guy

So there's long queues and you're posting here? Shame shame shame.....



Sympathizing and agreeing, but not able to contain the snark

It was my lunch period.

[The Flying Dutchman]

Originally Posted by Otto

It was my lunch period.

That would explain my 45 minute wait on hold the last time.

[Uvula Donor]

Why don't you just get another job? All you ever fucking do is bitch.

[Otto]

Originally Posted by Uvula Donor

Why don't you just get another job? All you ever fucking do is bitch.

Oh yeah, I've started a grand total of thirteen Pit threads in the last year, nine of them being work-related. Such constant bitching, one thread every six or seven weeks on average, how does the server stand up to such abuse?

It's pretty obvious from the thread title that it probably has something to do with work. If you don't want to read my bitching about work, don't open the fucking thread. Not really that complicated a concept.

[hopesperson]

Originally Posted by Otto

So of course the long hold times are a license for the callers to be rude little bitches, because yes it is me personally who's making them sit on hold because they're too fucking stupid to figure out that hey, if their cell phone number doesn't activate the card, maybe they should try the other cell number.

Are you sure your bitter hatred for your customers isn't coming through in your conversations with them? Not that I don't agree with you... I mean, how dare they complain for having to sit on hold for lord-knows-how-long only to ultimately be served by someone who thinks they're "so fucking stupid"?

[threemae]

Originally Posted by Otto

Such constant bitching, one thread every six or seven weeks on average, how does the server stand up to such abuse?
.

Nine pit threads in a year relating to your work? It's not exactly trolling, but it's not exactly the middle of the bell-curve either.

At some point the topic of your job is bound to be less enchantingly fresh and entertaining for others.

[zuma]

I'm not even sure exactly what a "call center" is, but I'm guessing it's customer service or some sort.

So they're being put on hold for long periods of time, and you're being a dick to them. Nice.

Also, 13 pit threads a year sounds like constant bitching to me, yo.

[Q.E.D.]

Originally Posted by zuma

So they're being put on hold for long periods of time, and you're being a dick to them. Nice.

Want to point out for me where he's being a dick to them?

[zweisamkeit]

Originally Posted by zuma

I'm not even sure exactly what a "call center" is, but I'm guessing it's customer service or some sort.

So they're being put on hold for long periods of time, and you're being a dick to them. Nice.

Also, 13 pit threads a year sounds like constant bitching to me, yo.

Like Q.E.D. said, where is he being rude TO them? And Otto ain't the one putting them on hold.

[Otto]

Originally Posted by threemae

At some point the topic of your job is bound to be less enchantingly fresh and entertaining for others.

I do try to make them entertaining. People seemed to enjoy No Halloween costumes at work and It's popcorn! How fucking dumb are you? seemed to be a crowd-pleaser.

Originally Posted by zuma

Also, 13 pit threads a year sounds like constant bitching to me, yo.

It's thirteen Pit threads total, only nine of which were work-related.

[Mr Bus Guy]

I'm not going to do the research (because it's Sunday, resting on the seventh day and all that.... no really), but I'd bet that enough of a percentage of Pit threads in total are work related.

Besides, like Otto says, at least they're pretty entertaining.

[Bambi Hassenpfeffer]

Originally Posted by zuma

Also, 13 pit threads a year sounds like constant bitching to me, yo.

As a 10-year veteran of retail, I could easily post 13 work threads a year (not that Otto does -- those of us who pay attention know that he has only posted 9 work threads) in the Pit. That's only one every four weeks. People on the front lines of customer service have encounters at least weekly and often daily that are just absolutely infuriating and/or ridiculous.

And I might post them, but every time one of us service workers does, we get something like

Originally Posted by Uvula Donor

Why don't you just get another job?

so we don't do it often. We're not allowed to complain about work, because serving you is supposed to bring us ecstatic satisfaction every minute of every day. I've worked in a call center. It can be fun, but it can also be incredibly draining. If the man needs to blow off some steam here once every six weeks, so the hell what?

[spooje]

Bitching about our jobs is our right as Americans.

Brain surgeons and pro Atheletes sometimes bitch about their jobs.

[descamisado]

Originally Posted by spooje

Bitching about our jobs is our right as Americans.

Brain surgeons and pro Atheletes sometimes bitch about their jobs.

Right? I thought it was required by law!

[Ike Witt]

[Drew Carey] You hate your job? You know there is a support group for that? It's called 'everybody'. They meet down at the bar. [/DC]

[PunditLisa]

If the other call center is perpetually understaffed and the overflow call center has zero additional stations staffed...well, it sounds like your managers are setting you up to be abused.

[Quartz]

Originally Posted by Uvula Donor

Why don't you just get another job? All you ever fucking do is bitch.

Hey chill. He's got to eat.

Besides, do you think you could stand the love-fest if we all posted ll the time about how we enjoyed our jobs?

[Harmonious Discord]

In China they don't bitch about their jobs, because they'll send the death van. Those organs have to come from somebody.

[BubbaDog]

I was put on hold for a long time the last time I called a "call center".

But the recording told me every 48 seconds that my call was important to them.

So, 23 min later I was in a good mood and ready for pleasant conversation.

[zweisamkeit]

Originally Posted by BubbaDog

I was put on hold for a long time the last time I called a "call center".

But the recording told me every 48 seconds that my call was important to them.

So, 23 min later I was in a good mood and ready for pleasant conversation.

The problem is that yes, by that time you're pissed. But the person responsible for you being on hold is not the person who picks up the phone.

When the servers go down where I work and there are 40 calls in waiting constantly*, we're not having a good time, either. We have to document tickets as quickly as we can and pick up the ringing line 5 seconds after it rings. When you're on hold, we're still hard at work, not sitting around surfing the net.

When you get on the line, you're not talking to the person who caused the problem or who decided to not have enough people staffing the phones. You're talking to the front line person whose job is to help you. I understand being really irritated at the wait (since I still do have to call other places, such as medical billing, etc. where I wait, too), but it's not the CSR/Help Desk Tech/whatever's fault.


* Even though there's a recorded message that tells them there's a problem with (whatever the problem is) and they don't hang up at that.

[Amblydoper]

Originally Posted by BubbaDog

I was put on hold for a long time the last time I called a "call center".
But the recording told me every 48 seconds that my call was important to them.
So, 23 min later I was in a good mood and ready for pleasant conversation.

I am sure that your snarky attitude came through in your conversation. How do you think the customer service rep feels, when call after call, people like you bitch and moan about being on hold? Maybe you could cut these guys some slack? What the fuck do you think they are doing while you are on hold? They are helping other people. Have you ever waited 23 minutes for a table at a busy restaurant? Or in line at the post office in December? Or in line for a roller coaster at a theme park?

Maybe those call centers need to bring in more customer service reps and those theme parks need to build more roller coasters.

[Cat Whisperer]

Nine pit threads about work in the last year? Yeah, that seems like a lot, but if I pitted everything that pissed me off at work, it'd be about one a day, so I'm going to go with that isn't all that much. And I don't even work in customer service - a customer called me last week to bitch me out about something that had nothing to do with me, so I took my phone number off the returned cheque letters I have to send out (see, people send in cheques that aren't cashable because some people are too freaking stupid to breathe, and you have to send the cheques back to them).

Um, what was my point again? Oh yeah, customers suck, and I sympathize with anyone whose livelihood depends on putting up with them on the front lines. Especially when management is obviously not on the ball.

[BubbaDog]

Originally Posted by CoG888

I am sure that your snarky attitude came through in your conversation.

Actually I was sweet as can be. Just because I wasn't in the mood to be nice, doesn't mean that I was ugly.

How do you think the customer service rep feels, when call after call, people like you bitch and moan about being on hold?

If they were like me the rep would probably be amazed.

Maybe you could cut these guys some slack? What the fuck do you think they are doing while you are on hold? They are helping other people.

Actually, that's just a guess. They could be sleeping, out to lunch (waiting in line for 23 minutes) or at a theme park. As a customer, the only feedback got was "your call is important to us" If I had heard "15 representatives are currently busy with customers, your estimated wait time is 23 min", I could decide to stay or hang up.

Have you ever waited 23 minutes for a table at a busy restaurant? Or in line at the post office in December? Or in line for a roller coaster at a theme park?

Yep In every one of those situations I was aware of the progress made towards serving me. Also, nobody ran up to me every 45 seconds to tell me that I was important. I consider that good.

Maybe those call centers need to bring in more customer service reps and those theme parks need to build more roller coasters.

Wow, CoG888, Ya think so? Maybe Otto should have thought of that in his rant. Oh wait, he did!

Just my luck, one of the slow kids decides to take a swipe at me.

[Thudlow Boink]

Originally Posted by Harmonious Discord

In China they don't bitch about their jobs, because they'll send the death van. Those organs have to come from somebody.

In Soviet Russia, jobs bitch about you!

[Ludovic]

Originally Posted by Harmonious Discord

In China they don't bitch about their jobs, because they'll send the death van. Those organs have to come from somebody.

In China, jobs bitch about YOU!

[Antinor01]

Reminds me of my days working in an insurance claims call center. After a major event, like a hurricane, we would have 100+ calls in the queue for hours on end. Good times.

[Duckster]

I ran a call center/helpdesk for three years. There was never enough cheese to go around with the amount of whine we would get from our callers. Then again, the more whiners that called, the more secure my job at the time.

[atomicbadgerrace]

Originally Posted by BubbaDog

If I had heard "15 representatives are currently busy with customers, your estimated wait time is 23 min", I could decide to stay or hang up.
Yep In every one of those situations I was aware of the progress made towards serving me.

Some companies already use this type of hold service. Last time I called my cell phone company, I was told that I was number 14 in line and had an expected wait time of 4 to 5 minutes. I know that my bank does it, too.

When I worked a call center, we briefly toyed with the idea of implementing this kind of system because our abandon rates were growing during busy periods. In the end, corporate came in and said no no, because if the customers heard that they were 119th in line with a hold time of 30 minutes, the negative imagery associated with it would be huge. They'd feel like "we screwed up" with at least 119 other people today.

[Arnold Winkelried]

Is the title of the OP referring to the people waiting on hold, or to the managers of your company who don't staff the call center properly? I would hope the latter.

I'm sorry, but if I call a company and wait for an hour on hold, that means that the company is doing a very poor job of staffing the call center.

After waiting for an hour, those customers will be irritated. When people are irritated they often become rude. You should let your managers now that the situation is unacceptable. I don't fault the customers. What are they supposed to do, congratulate the call center person for finally picking up the telephone? Or ask to speak to a manager to complain, and then get put on hold for another hour while waiting for the manager? When I call the company and get bad service, I don't know who's at fault, either you, the call center employee (maybe you're goofing off), or the management that doesn't hire enough people. And most people won't care who is at fault. They want to make their displeasure felt.

I hope that this level of rudeness inspires management to do somethign to keep call waiting times to a less offensive level.

[Vinyl Turnip]

staffing levels

The word you've entered isn't in the dictionary. Click on a spelling suggestion below or try again using the search bar above.
Suggestions for staffing levels:
1. stevengraphs 2. stevensgraphs
3. stevensgraph 4. stepping motor
5. cytopathologist 6. shoestring catch
7. shepherd's plaid 8. shepherd's purse
9. pseudoparenchymas 10. southern blotting
11. set up housekeeping 12. cytoplasmically
13. stepping-stone 14. statue of liberty
15. southern english 16. step function
17. shepherd's check 18. stepping-stones
19. south kingstown

Okay, I did what you people told me to do and it didn't work. I want to speak to a manager now!

[Slacker]

Having worked in a call center for a few years, I feel your pain. However, not to side with the customer, but what the heck does this mean?

Originally Posted by Otto

So of course the long hold times are a license for the callers to be rude little bitches, because yes it is me personally who's making them sit on hold because they're too fucking stupid to figure out that hey, if their cell phone number doesn't activate the card, maybe they should try the other cell number.

People have other cell numbers?

[fluiddruid]

Originally Posted by atomicbadgerrace

When I worked a call center, we briefly toyed with the idea of implementing this kind of system because our abandon rates were growing during busy periods. In the end, corporate came in and said no no, because if the customers heard that they were 119th in line with a hold time of 30 minutes, the negative imagery associated with it would be huge. They'd feel like "we screwed up" with at least 119 other people today.

It's shit like this that drove me out of the call center industry as soon as I can manage. We worry about our "abandon rate" (people who hang up before reaching somebody). So, to fix this, we won't actually add the staff to properly handle the calls, because that would be too expensive. Instead, we'll propose simply letting people know exactly how awful our service is so they can plan accordingly... and we'll be told no, because informing our customers is a bad idea. Clearly, customers are too dumb to realize that we have problems when we have a consistent half hour hold time.

Seriously, Otto, you need to get out.

[msmith537]

I'm sorry you are having trouble. Please stay in this thread and someone will be with you shortly to assist you with your problem.

[Bambi Hassenpfeffer]

Originally Posted by Slacker

People have other cell numbers?

I read it to mean that the rebate card is tied to a multi-line phone plan (a family plan or other sort of arrangement). If one of the numbers doesn't work, try the other one on the plan.

[Vinyl Turnip]

Originally Posted by fluiddruid

It's shit like this that drove me out of the call center industry as soon as I can manage. We worry about our "abandon rate" (people who hang up before reaching somebody). So, to fix this, we won't actually add the staff to properly handle the calls, because that would be too expensive. Instead, we'll propose simply letting people know exactly how awful our service is so they can plan accordingly... and we'll be told no, because informing our customers is a bad idea. Clearly, customers are too dumb to realize that we have problems when we have a consistent half hour hold time.

I ran into some similarly infuriating counterlogic when I worked for a private help desk and had to plead on my knees to be allowed to change the introductory recording message to announce when we were experiencing server issues. They didn't want the client to know when the server was down, so they preferred to let us waste time (both ours and the callers') answering hundreds of calls just to tell them the reason they couldn't connect was because the server was down.

The whole call center paradigm was just fucked. It was all about volume: how many calls you took per hour and how short you could get your call time, with no real focus on whether problems were actually solved on those dozens of impressively brief calls. If a customer had a complex problem that defied one of the boilerplate fixes, it ended up taking them multiple calls until they got someone like me (who tried to actually research the problem and come up with a logical solution, and who would end up suffering for his efforts) or got so furious that they demanded to speak to a manager, who would then try to defuse the situation by doing what should've been done in the first place. Meanwhile, my co-worker Jimmy Dipshit who told every customer to "reboot your computer and if that doesn't fix it, just call back!" would get managerial accolades for his record-setting call stats.

Originally Posted by fluiddruid

Seriously, Otto, you need to get out.

I thought so too, several rants ago. Now I think our friend (and anyone else who chooses to stay miserable and whine about it) is exactly where he deserves to be.

[LurkMeister]

I had to call MetLife today to ask about an insurance policy that my recently deceased father had taken out on me. I did not have the policy number (I didn't even know it existed until I got an e-mail about it from my brother over the weekend). Their recorded "help" line insisted on knowing the policy number before it would route me to a CSR. After I heard several repeats of "I'm sorry, I didn't understand that, could you repeat your policy number" I finally muttered, "I don't know the number, that's why I'm calling." Apparently, in addition to understanding spoken numbers it was also programmed to recognize something in that phrase because suddenly the message changed to "Did you say that you don't know your policy number? If that is the case, please say Yes."

Why the fuck can't you list "I don't know the policy number" as one of the options instead of repeatedly asking for it and refusing to even transfer me to a real person until I gave you one? And then, of course, when I finally got a real person the first thing she asked me for was the policy number. I decided to let her live, and before anybody jumps on me, I was very polite to her as she got the information she needed to send me the paperwork I needed.

[niblet_head]

Originally Posted by Arnold Winkelried

Is the title of the OP referring to the people waiting on hold, or to the managers of your company who don't staff the call center properly? I would hope the latter.

I'm sorry, but if I call a company and wait for an hour on hold, that means that the company is doing a very poor job of staffing the call center.

After waiting for an hour, those customers will be irritated. When people are irritated they often become rude. You should let your managers now that the situation is unacceptable. I don't fault the customers. What are they supposed to do, congratulate the call center person for finally picking up the telephone? Or ask to speak to a manager to complain, and then get put on hold for another hour while waiting for the manager? When I call the company and get bad service, I don't know who's at fault, either you, the call center employee (maybe you're goofing off), or the management that doesn't hire enough people. And most people won't care who is at fault. They want to make their displeasure felt.

I hope that this level of rudeness inspires management to do somethign to keep call waiting times to a less offensive level.

They will do something to lower hold times. They'll push even harder for the reps to shorten their calls (resulting in even worse service like Vinyl Turnip describes because the reps who care have longer call times) or they'll program even more shit to be handled via the Automatic Voice Response Unit (IOW - press 1 to change your address, press 2 to let us know you've become dead, press 3 to provide us with proof you are dead, press 4 to blah blah blah... )

[Otto]

Originally Posted by Bambi Hassenpfeffer

I read it to mean that the rebate card is tied to a multi-line phone plan (a family plan or other sort of arrangement). If one of the numbers doesn't work, try the other one on the plan.

This.

Originally Posted by Vinyl Turnip

I thought so too, several rants ago. Now I think our friend (and anyone else who chooses to stay miserable and whine about it) is exactly where he deserves to be.

Because you're an expert not only on the Madison job market but also on my personal state of being and preparedness to look for another job. Fuck you.

[jjimm]

Originally Posted by zuma

I'm not even sure exactly what a "call center" is...

I want to know how the fuck you've managed to exist in the western world and yet avoid this piece of information.

[stpauler]

Originally Posted by jjimm

I want to know how the fuck you've managed to exist in the western world and yet avoid this piece of information.

Because most of the call centers are in the eastern world now?

[jjimm]

Originally Posted by stpauler

Because most of the call centers are in the eastern world now?

God forbid those wily orientals hook these fiendish things up to our phonelines, then!

[Vinyl Turnip]

Originally Posted by Otto

Because you're an expert not only on the Madison job market but also on my personal state of being and preparedness to look for another job. Fuck you.

No, no expert. No doubt some astrological confluence of external factors has fixed you where you sit lo these many months, going on years: a bright beacon afloat in a sea of mediocrity; paralyzed but not insensate; impotent, yet unwilling to suffer in silence. I'll light a candle in my window for you.

[Otto]

Originally Posted by Vinyl Turnip

No, no expert. No doubt some astrological confluence of external factors has fixed you where you sit lo these many months, going on years: a bright beacon afloat in a sea of mediocrity; paralyzed but not insensate; impotent, yet unwilling to suffer in silence. I'll light a candle in my window for you.

Well, you know, I've had a lot of shit going on in my life over the last several years on both a personal and a professional level. Much of this shit has left me at a point where, owing to a variety of factors, the cost/benefit analyisis of looking for a new job at this point compared to the cost/benefit analysis of staying where I am leads me to the conclusion that staying where I am is the better choice for me for now. But hey, thanks for the candle. Please feel free to cram it right up your ass, fucker.

[Muffin]

Originally Posted by Harmonious Discord

In China they don't bitch about their jobs, because they'll send the death van. Those organs have to come from somebody.

Actually, that's India, with all its call centres and Dr. Kidney doing a pissing-good business.

[Klaatu]

Originally Posted by Otto

Well, you know, I've had a lot of shit going on in my life over the last several years on both a personal and a professional level. Much of this shit has left me at a point where, owing to a variety of factors, the cost/benefit analyisis of looking for a new job at this point compared to the cost/benefit analysis of staying where I am leads me to the conclusion that staying where I am is the better choice for me for now. But hey, thanks for the candle. Please feel free to cram it right up your ass, fucker.

It's all because of the twenty bucks. Dude, you are getting a royal bad karmic payback.