So where do I put my boob when I'm playing guitar?

[OpalCat]

I have recently started trying to learn to play acoustic guitar. My guitar is a classical, 3/4 size, and my boyfriends is a full sized acoustic. I can't play his yet because the metal strings are too hurty. That, plus I'm in a different state right now.

Anyway, so I'm sitting here with the guitar--classical, so no strap--and it fits pretty well on my lap against my leg... but my right boob is kind of mashed under the fat part of the body of the guitar. I have 32DD boobs, so they're a noticeable obstacle and make the guitar sit too far out from my body (aside from being uncomfortable.)

I can lift my boob up and rest it in the "waist" section of the body... but I think that looks tacky as hell. Is there a standard way to deal with this?

[Johnny L.A.]

So where do I put my boob when I'm playing guitar?

Tell him to go into the other room until you're finished.

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by Johnny L.A.

Tell him to go into the other room until you're finished.

A big hand, ladies and gentlemen! Catch the midnight show and try the steak tartare!

[OpalCat]

You're not allowed to shill meat products in my thread, Chefguy :P Vegetarian's prerogative.

[Mr. Excellent]

I'm sorry, I can't help it:

Hi, Opal!

[SSG Schwartz]

Whenever I have a question like this, I look to the best source for an answer. Liz Phair may be of help.

SSG Schwartz

[Zsofia]

Well, I don't have double-anythings, but I don't have a problem with Cs. Are you possibly leaning forward too much? That could combine with boobage to shove the guitar out more than you want it.

[Eutychus]

So where do I put my boob when I'm playing guitar?

The Boobie Trap?

[Krokodil]

I think your options boil down to:

--Let it sit on top
--Park it behind
--Buy a strap

I don't know. I'm a guy. Sorry.

[DrFidelius]

I have asked The Wife this question, and now she is afraid to pick up her guitar. Despite thirty-five years of playing, she fears that she will not know how to hold the instrument.

Thank you for injecting doubt into my wife's mind...

[Greg Charles]

1. I'll hold on to it.
2. Preferably while your boyfriend is somewhere else.
3. Hi, Opal! How you doing?

[freekalette]

D-cup bassist checkin' in!

A strap is a good idea, but I know that with an acoustic, sometimes you want to sit down and do the whole "folk singer" thing. What I do is prop my right foot up on something small, like a milk crate, and hunch my back a little bit. YMMV, but it works for me.

And yes, when I am home alone, I so totally prop my boob on the top. It's comfy!

[lobotomyboy63]

Originally Posted by Greg Charles

1. I'll hold on to it.
2. Preferably while your boyfriend is somewhere else.
3. Hi, Opal! How you doing?

You walked right into that one, Opal.

Since dopers like to ponder all things, here's one for you.

The unique Traveling Songwriter has a thin body of solid mahogany with a rear sound hole

(underlining mine)

http://www.birdlandmusic.net/product.php?productid=2961

How would the lovely, talented, and uh, buxom Opal play without blocking it?

Hi, Opal? How you doing?

[Savannah]

I plob the boob over top. It actually helps hold the guitar in place. Of course, I do not perform in public. Only when alone in the house.

[gaffa]

Originally Posted by freekalette

D-cup bassist checkin' in!

From what I've seen, most bassists other than John Entwhistle tend to sling it fairly low.

[Bryan Ekers]

On the drums.

[gaffa]

I decided to check the videos I've shot. I hadn't paid attention to it before, but this piece of video features a female vocalist playing a full-sized acoustic guitar, and she seems to have her right breast tucked into the left cutaway. This was before an audience, and I'm a healthy heterosexual male and I hadn't noticed this until now. So I wouldn't worry too much about what people think. If you're talented enough, people aren't going to be looking at your breasts. If not, there's always "American Idol".

[freekalette]

Originally Posted by gaffa

From what I've seen, most bassists other than John Entwhistle tend to sling it fairly low.

Pssst! Me too, but we were talkin' about playing sitting down.

[OpalCat]

Originally Posted by SSG Schwartz

Whenever I have a question like this, I look to the best source for an answer. Liz Phair may be of help.

SSG Schwartz

Nope, no good. She's standing up and has a strap. Mine is a classical guitar with no strap--you have to play it sitting down.

I have to emphasize this since a lot of people seem to be suggesting getting a strap: it's a classical guitar. Not an acoustic guitar. I would have to drill holes in it to put a strap on it and I'm not willing to do that. (There is some kind of strap that clips onto the sound hole but I've heard that can chew into the wood.)

Additionally, there are two reasons why I don't want to play standing up. First, I have very low blood pressure and get dizzy a lot--I generally don't do most things standing up if I can avoid it. More importantly, though, is that the stuff I want to play would, I think, be a lot harder to do standing up. I don't want to do chord-strum-strum-strum, chord-strum-strum-strum type stuff. The stuff I'm learning is all single-string picking and playing individual notes. (I have yet to actually try to play anything that involves any strumming at all, in fact.)

The video of Happy Rhodes is encouraging, but she plays standing up and so her guitar sits a little lower than mine does, so it's more nestled in. To get my boob on top of my guitar I actually have to lift it up and it's sort of squished up in addition to sitting on top. Plus, being a 3/4 size guitar and therefore small, so that part of the guitar is much closer to the middle of my body, meaning my boob is also squished to the middle. :/

Zsofia - that's a good point. I'm just learning and so I do lean forward a bit to see the strings. I'm really, really not to the stage yet when I can even come close to doing a chord without looking at the strings. Also, since I'm not just strumming, at this stage of learning I have to look at my right hand, too.

Savannah - it's encouraging to hear that putting the boob on top is at least considered acceptable to some!

[Equipoise]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

The video of Happy Rhodes is encouraging, but she plays standing up and so her guitar sits a little lower than mine does, so it's more nestled in.

Here are a few of videos of her playing while sitting. It's funny, I never noticed where she keeps her boob before either, now it's very noticeable to me! Damn, it's like the "cigarette burn" being pointed out on films.

Temporary and Eternal

Collective Heart

Feed The Fire

If Wishes Were Horses How Beggars Would Ride (well, actually she's standing up but with her foot on a chair) (warning: excruciatingly sad song about putting a beloved cat to sleep)

[Red Barchetta]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

So where do I put my boob when I'm playing guitar?

I'll hold it for you

[ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies]

If playing in front of other people, I sit and hunch. When recording at home, I sit and prop. Because my left hand skills are so sucky that I have to watch what I'm doing, even if I stand and use a strap the right boob is still in the way.

[Krokodil]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

Savannah - it's encouraging to hear that putting the boob on top is at least considered acceptable to some!

I want to go on record as saying this is totally acceptable, and a fine idea to boot.

[Euthanasiast]

Opal, which leg are you resting the lower waist of the guitar on? The short answer to your question is that your chest needs to be behind the body of the guitar, but you can switch legs for comfort. Some women prefer the left leg when presented with your issue.

I assume you are holding the guitar in the traditional classical manner, with the waist resting on your right leg. Try switching to the left leg and make some comfort adjustments in your posture and the way you position your arms and hands and you might find that it suits you better. Take a picture of yourself as you are holding it now and post it. That might also help us to determine the best position for you.

large, classical guitars really are a different breed.

[Euthanasiast]

Here. Found this online, and this is about what I am referring to. Again, your comfort is the most important thing, because you won't continue to play if it isn't comfortable.

Send in a picture of you with the guitar. It's possible that this thing is just so massive that it is completely wrong for you.

[OpalCat]

Well, "large" isn't an issue as it's a 3/4 size guitar. I can't take a picture because I'm in New Hampshire in a cottage in the middle of nowhere, by myself until Thursday. Tomorrow when I attempt to practice again I will try different legs.

[OpalCat]

Originally Posted by Euthanasiast

Send in a picture of you with the guitar. It's possible that this thing is just so massive that it is completely wrong for you.

It might be massive for a hobbit or something, but it's a tiny guitar.

[kaylasdad99]

Like a requinto?

[pbbth]

Cut a hole in the back to leave space for your boob? Sorry, I got nothing.

[Euthanasiast]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

It might be massive for a hobbit or something, but it's a tiny guitar.

Ok, then you should have no problem switching to the other leg.

[OpalCat]

Originally Posted by kaylasdad99

Like a requinto?

No, like a 3/4 sized classical guitar.


Enthusiast: I just tried resting it like the picture, and it doesn't work because I am a short, small-framed person* (with proportionately short arms) and putting it on my left leg means that my left arm is pretty much straight out to reach the end of the neck. Maybe if I was a better guitar player I could play like that but at the skill level I'm at now, I need some bend in my elbow.




*my reason for getting a small guitar to begin with, incidentally.

[Snooooopy]

According to legend, the Amazons would cut off one breast in order to enhance their ability to rock out.

[OpalCat]

Ah, see, but I have no desire to rock out. I want to play delicate, complex classical guitar pieces, not rock.

[Clockwork Jackal]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

No, like a 3/4 sized classical guitar.


Enthusiast: I just tried resting it like the picture, and it doesn't work because I am a short, small-framed person* (with proportionately short arms) and putting it on my left leg means that my left arm is pretty much straight out to reach the end of the neck. Maybe if I was a better guitar player I could play like that but at the skill level I'm at now, I need some bend in my elbow.




*my reason for getting a small guitar to begin with, incidentally.

I think the 3/4 size guitar might be your problem. I play on a full sized classical guitar (a Yamaha G-80 from 1969, the sound is really nice.) I'm a small-framed person too, (5 feet tall, 110 pounds) and I'm right handed, so I play with the guitar on my lap with my left leg raised and I have no problems reaching the fretboard. Actually, my arm is quite bent, as I have the headstock part of the guitar angled back just slightly. The "shoulder" (I can't remember the term I'm looking for) of the guitar hits me right between the chest. You might want to consider switching to a full sized guitar. Also, my very first guitar was a total piece of crap, made by valencia, it was also 3/4 sized. I didn't get very far when I first started learning, probably because of that crap guitar. I found the G-80 to be heaven compared to it, and I've progressed quite far comparatively. (Although I seem to be doing the exact opposite of what you're doing. I'm learning more chord, strum, strum, strum while singing.)

So, my advice: get a decent full sized guitar.

ETA: Here's a stupid question: What kind of guitar is it exactly? What brand/model?

[Snooooopy]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

Ah, see, but I have no desire to rock out. I want to play delicate, complex classical guitar pieces, not rock.

Aw, you know what I mean! Now get out that scalpel!

[Sage Rat]

Never played a guitar, but I'd suggest perhaps trying something like putting a pillow between your belly and the guitar for example. Takes zero time or money to test, at any rate.

And if you learn to play anything like this or this, make sure to post a vid.

[Euthanasiast]

Originally Posted by OpalCat

No, like a 3/4 sized classical guitar.


Enthusiast: I just tried resting it like the picture, and it doesn't work because I am a short, small-framed person* (with proportionately short arms) and putting it on my left leg means that my left arm is pretty much straight out to reach the end of the neck. Maybe if I was a better guitar player I could play like that but at the skill level I'm at now, I need some bend in my elbow.




*my reason for getting a small guitar to begin with, incidentally.

What is the make and model? If I could get a better look at it, I might be able to make other suggestions. The short answer is to do whatever it takes to make it comfortable and easy for you to reach all of the frets on the neck, but I suspect you already knew that.

Also, I say this in every thread I post to on playing the guitar. It is worth every time and pain to learn to play the guitar. It is the most rewarding hobby I've ever had, and I've had hundreds.

[bienville]

Can't tell you what to do with the guitar you've got, but if you go guitar shopping I always point out this guitar to big boobed guitarists. It's even a classical guitar- just your flavor!

Of course the artist in the picture is the only person I have ever seen with such a guitar (and, as follows, the actual individual guitar that she herself owns is the only one of its kind that I've ever seen) so, even if you are guitar shopping, it might not be an easy find.

But its unique cut seems pretty good for respecting boobage!
(Yes, the artist pictured is not big boobed, and yes she is standing, but look at the cut of the guitar)

[si_blakely]

Why not look at one of these - I am pretty sure that you don't even need the upper frame

Do Ovation do a classical guitar? - the bowl back may be more comfortable.
Hmm - I see that they do.


Otherwise, I see a new market for a slightly different form of cut-away classical acoustic guitar

Si

[CalMeacham]

According to legend, the Amazons would cut off one breast in order to enhance their ability to rock out.

I've always been suspicious of this. If you look at ancient depictions of the Mazaons -- on vases and sarcophagi and the like -- they clearly haven't had any surgery done. And most mythological sources that tell stories about the Amazons don't say anything about this supposed practice. And you have to ark at it to make "Amazon" = "without Breast". The "breast" part is pretty iffy. In short, I suspect another o'them male fantasies here.



If it ain't worth it for archery, it certainly isn't worth it for guitar-playing. Just say "no" to performamce mastectomies.

[Sage Rat]

Originally Posted by CalMeacham

I've always been suspicious of this. If you look at ancient depictions of the Mazaons -- on vases and sarcophagi and the like -- they clearly haven't had any surgery done. And most mythological sources that tell stories about the Amazons don't say anything about this supposed practice. And you have to ark at it to make "Amazon" = "without Breast". The "breast" part is pretty iffy. In short, I suspect another o'them male fantasies here.

http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mamazon.html

[Lobohan]

I have the same problem with my scrotum when I play the cello.

[CalMeacham]

I've felt that way since long before Bibliophage wrote that entry, Sage Rat.

And see Tyrrell's book Amazons on the topic:

http://www.amazon.com/Amazons-Mythma...7851861&sr=1-4

[Cervaise]

Originally Posted by Sage Rat

http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mamazon.html

Snerk. "Mamazon."

[Doctor Who]

Have you thought about holding it in a classical style?

It sounds like you are holding it like most guitar players --- on your right leg, pressed up against your right side. There is an alternative that you usually see in classical style guitar playing. Hold it on your left leg like the pictures in my link.

Apologies if anyone mentioned this yet - I read the thread but didn't see anything.

ETA: And, as an aside, despite what my link seems to suggest, you CAN hold the guitar on your left leg without needing a foot rest.

[Snooooopy]

Originally Posted by CalMeacham

I've always been suspicious of this. If you look at ancient depictions of the Mazaons -- on vases and sarcophagi and the like -- they clearly haven't had any surgery done. And most mythological sources that tell stories about the Amazons don't say anything about this supposed practice. And you have to ark at it to make "Amazon" = "without Breast". The "breast" part is pretty iffy. In short, I suspect another o'them male fantasies here.



If it ain't worth it for archery, it certainly isn't worth it for guitar-playing. Just say "no" to performamce mastectomies.

Yeah, I posted my advice knowing full well that the legend doesn't really hold up.

[CalMeacham]

Yeah, I posted my advice knowing full well that the legend doesn't really hold up.

It's OK. I knew ya wasn't serious.

[lieu]

Well there's a perfectly good metronome going to waste.

[OpalCat]

Originally Posted by Doctor Who

Have you thought about holding it in a classical style?

It sounds like you are holding it like most guitar players --- on your right leg, pressed up against your right side.

The way I hold it now, it's on my right leg, but it's pretty much flat across the front of me. I will try it the way in the picture.

As for the many people offering advice on buying a new guitar, you can stop now. It isn't happening anytime soon. I'm a full time student and a single parent. I don't have a job. I certainly can't afford to spend money on something like a new guitar. Not for many years to come, anyway. My guitar cost $70 about 8 years ago (yeah I got it that long ago but haven't gotten around to trying to learn until recently) and I couldn't afford to pay even that little to buy a new one today.

My guitar is Gremlin, model G10N. It looks like this. My mom picked it out for me. She played it and said it had good sound and various other features good for a beginner like me. She's been playing for about 40 years and has taught others, so I figure she probably knows what she's talking about.

[Duckster]

Originally Posted by DrFidelius

Despite thirty-five years of playing, she fears that she will not know how to hold the instrument.

Um, we're talking about a guitar here. What are you talking about?