Inspired by this thread, what is the funniest one-time-only SNL sketch (that didn’t involve recurring characters)?
The all-time funniest SNL skit, hands-down, has to be “More Cowbell,” which is apparently on neither Youtube nor Nbc.com.
Bonus: the all-time funniest thing ever said on “Weekend Update”: “Peter Sarsgaard and Maggie Gyllenhaal announced their engagement. They’re registerd at Craate and Baarrell.”
Chris Farley and Patrick Swayze as auditioning Chippendale dancers. Makes me laugh every time.
The “Buckwheat Has Been Shot/Buckwheat Is Dead” sketch (it was in multiple parts, but it had to be) was brilliant.
Funniest has to be the William Shatner “Get a Life” sketch. Second best, IMHO, was the 1992 presidential debate between Bush I, Clinton and Perot. There’s a shot at the end of that one where Bush is looking at Clinton and seeing a pot-smoking hippie, Clinton is looking at Bush and seeing a Church Lady, and both of them looking at Perot and see a munchkin from the Wizard of Oz - brilliant, insightful AND funny.
Funniest Weekend Update line - The setup - Joe Biden pulled out of the race for the 1988 Democratic nomination due to accusations of plagerism. A few months later, Gary Hart, who had pulled out due to an adultery scandal, returned to the race. Dennis Miller’s line: Gary Hart re-entered the presidential race, saying, “Let’s let the people decide.” A few hours later, Joe Biden re-entered the race, saying “Let’s let the people decide.”
My favorite Weekend Update line, though not what anyone would consider the funniest, was also by Dennis Miller (can you tell what age range I’m in? Sorry…): “This week, the People’s Republic of China announced that its population has reached one billion people. Do you realize how big a billion people is? That means that even if you’re a one-in-a-million kind of guy, there’s still a thousand of you walking around out there.”
Larry’s Corner from back on 10/8/83.
Brad Hall was the host of a talk show and decided rather than having a celebrity guest he would have some of his old high school friends on the show.
Eddie (Tim Kurzinsky) - The guy who would drink anything.
Dale- The guy who when drinking milk and laughing the milk would come out of his nose.
Jimmy- The guy who could make fart noises under his arm.
Larry (Brad) introduces them and welcomes them to the show. Dale starts drinking a glass of milk, Jimmy starts making fart noise, milk starts coming out of Dale’s nose, Eddie uses the glass to catch the falling milk and drink it, hilarity ensues, Eddie bypasses the glass and gets down on his knees to catch the milk coming out of Dale’s nose directly into his mouth.
I also remember this skit ending by being immediately interupted for the “Buckwheat has been shot” story but it appears my memory is wrong.
Sarsgaard was a host one week. There was a great skit where he was the guest speaker at a pirate convention (“What’s your favorite restuarant - is it Aaaaarby’s?” “What kind of socks do you like - aaaaargyle?”). Then he did a fake commercial for his own brand of surgical mask - the Peter Saarsgard SARS Guard.
There was an episode with Jim Carrey and another famous impersonator (Rich Little, maybe?) on a talk show. Except that Jim Carrey was played by a regular cast member, and Rich Little was played by Jim Carrey. At some point the fake Jim started mocking the fake Rich, so Jim-as-Rich started impersonating Jim Carrey, at which point the fake Jim Carrey started impersonating Rich Little as impersonated by Jim Carrey. It was wonderfully strange. (I may have misremembered many of the details of it–I just remember being astonished by its cleverness).
Sly Stallone as a retarded computer salesman. Tim Meadows and Will Farrell are the straight men.
It makes me lose my shit just thinking about it.
I think it was Jimmy Stewart, not Rich Little. It was on “The Jow Pesci Show.”
Bernadette Peters as Betty Boop. 
For some reason I can’t explain, Mark Wahlberg Talks to Animals makes me cry with laughter every time.
“Now I’na talk to a dawnkey!”
I loved the one with Christian Slater (I think) and some other dude where they were selling all sorts of exotic art stash boxes. “You put your weeeed in it…”
Three come to mind:
Men’s Synchronized Swimming - Harry Shearer and Martin Short star in a documentary about trying to get onto the MSS Olympic team even though no such team exists yet. Chris Guest plays a very Guffman dance instructor. Unfortunately finding the full version is proving elusive: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4122944961711350389
Jackie Rogers Jr.'s $100,000 Jackpot Wad - Martin Short again with Jim Belushi as Captain Kangaroo and Billy Crystal as Sammy Davis Jr. Right up there with Celebrity Jeopardy as my favorite game show. It looks like any video remnants are gone of this.
Massive Head Wound Harry - Dana Carvey is at a party with a nasty huge open head wound. The hijinks ensue when a dog finds a tasty snack of his brain. This is at least on Hulu: http://www.hulu.com/watch/4155/saturday-night-live-massive-head-wound-harry
Morning talk show with Will Ferrell and David Allan Grier. They lose their TelePromTer feed and quickly descend into Lord of the Flies-style savagery.
Sharon Stone getting strip-searched at an airport. This was, like, 15 years ago when Sharon Stone was really someone people wanted to see naked. I am a bad person for enjoying this scene. I don’t care.
I’m kinda partial to the SNL fake commercials. I always liked this one, *Turlington Tattoo Remover.
http://www.guzer.com/videos/snl_tattoo_removal.php
“That tingling lets you know it’s working!”
Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball!
Offhand, I’d say one of the funniest one-time bits that stays with me would be Phil Hartman’s “Sassy Boys!” talk show.
I absolutely do not get the love for the More Cowbell sketch. I’ve seen it multiple times, and just stare blankly.
So I’ll vote for the gay beer commercial.
“That parrot is a liar!”