I was taken to task last night for not removing my cowboy hat in the bar–actually a private club, but we were in the bar room at the time.
At first, I laughed it off, but he was quite serious. When I asked him why, he said, “clearly, you didn’t grow up around here (Montana). It’s a matter of respect.”
Now, I understand that there are traditions in this country. Men are supposed to doff their hats for the national anthem, or when entering a church, and so on. But WHY?
Why should I remove my cowboy hat when three guys in the bar were wearing baseball caps? Why do men have to take off their hats, but not women? What about guys with do-rags, or toques, or turbans? Would a visor count? Why is my hat-hair more respectful than my expensive custom 50x beaver hat?
To me, this is no different from not wearing white shoes after Labor Day, or not wearing brown shoes with a blue suit, but this guy wasn’t some fashionista–he’s a rancher who wears cowboy hats every day, and by golly takes them off indoors.
Is there some historical rationale behind this, and can it possibly apply to life today?
Historically, women in many cultures, especially married women, have been expected to cover their heads as a sign of modesty. Thus, a woman wouldn’t be asked to remove her headcovering. More recently, a woman’s hat has been considered part of her outfit, not mere outerwear, so she isn’t expected to remove it (although she may be asked to remove it as a courtesy to others, e.g. in an theater where her hat may obstruct the view of the stage).
Turbans stay on because they’re religious headwear, and the devotee is supposed to keep it on. Similar rules apply to yarmulkes and kufis - basically, religion trumps tradition.
By “toque” I assume you mean a knitted hat of the sort that one wears for winter outdoor sports. That comes off because it’s intended to keep your head warm, not to satisfy a religious obligation or to accessorize your indoor clothing.
Do-rags, to me, are the male equivalent of curlers. I personally think it looks tacky to wear one outside unless one is just running errands or doing chores. However, if you need to wear one, it stays on, because taking it off will screw up your hairdo.
Why remove your hat when three other guys were wearing caps? I don’t know - perhaps he’d already hassled them before you came in. I have noticed that here in the Midwest, many people seem to exempt ball caps from the “no hats” rule except during the pledge of allegiance or other flag-oriented activity. This may apply in Montana as well. I’m a bit mystified as to why you were hassled about a high-quality cowboy hat. It was my understanding that a hat of that sort also stays on indoors.
I remember when Ken Salazar was appointed by Obama. He typically wears both a hat and a Bolo, trying I assume to cultivate that western roots appeal. Found an article on him that is replete with a few ‘accepted rules.’ For your reading pleasure…
There was a time when taking off one’s hat when indoors was always done. I’m 48 and I can still remember, when I was young, being told to take my hat off when I came inside.
Let me try to explain, although I probably won’t be able to put it into words as accurately as I want to. Hats were originally invented to protect the head outdoors, from the sunshine, the rain, and other elements. Even if you are just wearing your hat for looks, it’s still ultimately an “outdoor” garment, the same way that a heavy overcoat or a pair of gloves are. If you’re a guest at someone’s house, or in an indoor setting in general, you would remove “outdoor” clothes if you were going to stay there for a prolonged period of time. To leave your overcoat, gloves or hat on would be implying that you had just stopped in and you were going to run out the door a few seconds later. Since you’re supposed to feel and act “welcome” to be somewhere, like a club or restaurant, it’s considered rude to leave your hat on because it’s as if at any moment you might get up and leave. It’s not something that anyone talks about or anything, but it’s silently understood. Taking the hat off is symbolic of your respect for the host, whether it’s an individual’s home or a restaurant.
Maybe in time this tradition will fade. But it definitely galls me to see so many people wearing hats inside. I was definitely raised to never wear one indoors. (I’m 23 years old.)
There are specific Army and Navy regulations (which are different from each other) regarding when and under what circumstances a sderviceman uncovers “indoors”.
And the reason that this applies traditionally to men and not women is that at certain times in the past, many women’s hats were elaborately attached to their hairdos, and not as easily removed and replaced.
h.sapiens is quite correct. Ladies once used hatpins, so their hats wouldn’t fall off and ruin their look. Imagine having to unpin your hat and then try to refix it when going back outside.
I too, was raised with the “men take their hats off inside” and still frown (inside) when they do not, baseball cap or not. Traditions are hard to forget! But then, I remember wearing white gloves, white shoes and a little white hat (with a pretty pink dress) to a cousin’s summer wedding. We didn’t wear black shoes after Memorial Day, or white shoes after Labor Day. It “just wasn’t done!”
I must say this is something I never knew before (not being a hat-wearer).
I would think this could occasionally be a nuisance – if you were somewhere with no hat rack. Especially if the hat were large and expensive. (Although if it were expensive, I don’t know that I’d let it out of my sight. Life is so complicated!)
I guess you get an exception if you’re a performer on stage… don’t a lot of country (and other) musicians wear hats while performing?
I have a standard argument that puts this to bed quite easily: Very few restaurants, bars, and so forth have hat racks anymore, and I’m not going to take a nice hat and set it on a sticky bar where it will get drinks spilled on it, or on the floor where someone will step on it.
Unfortunately, this place still has hat racks.
Argent Towers, I understand what you’re saying, but then why are there restaurants in big cities that require wearing a coat and tie? The deeper I ponder this, the more arbitrary it seems.
You hear these clothing-related rants all the time: gasp she wore flip-flops in the White House – he wore shorts to church – she wore a purple blouse with a blue dress – he wore a brown belt with black shoes – he wore a hat in the bar. They’re all just random fashionista rules to me.
A coat and tie aren’t outerwear. It would be like wearing your parka or your raincoat indoors.
I agree with the sentiment of removing your hat any time you’re in a building that is functionally similar to a home (such as a restaurant or hotel room), but bars and saloons are commonly accepted as a-ok venues for remaining lidded. In this instance, the cowboy was wrong.
ETA: and for the record, I’m female but do remove my (utility-type)hat indoors.
I was raised that you do not wear your hat indoors. Exceptions were only religious head wear and some types of head wear on women.
Otherwise you other examples are all about proper decorum not arbitrary fashion. I would not wear flip-flops in the White House, in a court house, in church, or anywhere I would be expected to appear courteous and respectful, such as to a job interview. Flip-flops will get you sent home from our office.
I have known Ken Salazar for a number of years, and I assure you he doesn’t just wear the hat (or tie) to “cultivate that western roots appeal.” He and his family are working ranchers and the hat has been working attire for him long before he got into politics. He is far from what we out here call a “drug-store cowboy”.
As to whether he takes his hat off when he is inside, he does.
Understood and acknowledged. And I was raised to address all adults as Mr/Mrs/Miss <lastname>, always wear a suit to church, and never end a sentence with a preposition. All of these have declined massively over the years, because there’s no reason behind any of them.
What, exactly, is the difference between “proper decorum” and “arbitrary fashion”? Who decided that this pair of sandals is formal but that pair of flip-flops gets you sent home? Who decided that women can wear sleeveless tops in an office and men can’t? Who decided that it’s copacetic for the biker to wear a do-rag, the “city” teenager to wear a stocking cap, and the “country” teenager to wear a baseball cap, and the woman to wear any hat she chooses, but I need to take mine off when I walk through the door?
I’ve always thought that fashion should be a personal choice. I know a lot of people laugh at others because of fashion (“I can’t believe she wore that skirt with that top!”), but actually forcing someone to wear a tie in that restaurant or take a hat off in that bar seems over-the-top to me.
(And, before it comes up, I always remove my hat in theaters and similar venues unless I’ve asked the person behind me and verified that they can see over me. THAT is common courtesy.)
We have a culture. Fashion is part of a culture, and humans find it fun to think up rules.
If you are a fashion disaster who wears white shoes after Labor Day or before Memorial Day, then you are seen by others as the sort of person who flouts that particular fashion rule, nothing more. I had an argument with a friend, for years, about whether it was Easter or Memorial Day.
It’s Memorial Day.
But the way I’ve seen it with cowboy hats is, at a bar men wear them and women wear them. Women don’t ever have to remove them (because to do so might expose a flat, unattractive hairstyle). In somebody’s house, the man would take the hat off.
OK, I’m probably going to screw this up, but let me take a shot at this…You see, out here, the “cowboy” hat is more than just a hat to us. Now, I know I am sounding silly already, and I apologize for that, but bear with me. It is a symbol of who we are and what it took to get here. It is a dying symbol, to be sure, but for those of us who grew up in the West it is a tool, a style, a piece of survival gear, a piece of us, as it were. My father used to joke that for a true cowboy, it was the first piece of clothing on in the morning and the last off each night, but with that in mind, it came off when you went “inside.” You might not let go of it, or let it far from you, but it came off because we know that by being off it still was a part of us showing respect and making a statement. Watch when the fellow who asked you to take off your hat gestures with his hat, how he holds it when he stands with it in his hand, how he sets it under his chair when he sits at the table. I’ll bet my father did it exactly the same way.
The hat is something special out here. And just because you paid $400 dollars for it or as little as $40 it doesn’t mean much. Also out here, the hat wasn’t just something we buy. Often it came from someone else, probably someone special in some way and how we used the hat and showed respect with that hat reflects not only on us but on whom we got the hat from. Often, if you want to start a fight out here, do something to a man’s hat. I told you this would sound silly. And I guess it is, but when it’s been part of a culture for generations - well, we understand it. And you not being from around there, you didn’t. And I’m betting the fellow who confronted you resented you having a such a hat and not understanding that.
No, it depends where you live. In most of the Southern U.S., it’s Easter. In the colder northern states, Memorial Day. In Cuba, you can wear white most anytime.
