Piece of Shit AOL!!!
I had just finished writing a very lenghty repsonse to the “Pledge of Allegiance” thread in GD when AOL and the piece of shit that it is went to hell and my screen was gone. More than 30 minutes worth of work, thought and proofreading down the fucking toilet!! This was to be my bets thread to fucking Date.
So AOL, eat my shit for fucking me over with your high prices and your shitty service.
You have monkey shit? Do you buy it canned in the grocery store or fresh at the zoo? Or do you simply have your very own monkey, giving you an endless supply for giving out to special people?
Dude. I don’t know who this “bets” is, but I don’t want to hear what you’re doing with her on your fucking Date.
Paging Dr. Remulak. The lobotomy didn’t take, paging Dr. Remulak.
And I know, AOL = Assholes on line… what can I tell ya, hon? Compose your response in a word processing program first then cut and paste… that way you don’t lose your “great thoughts”; that’s assuming you have one greater than the fact that AOL sucks.
Which, frankly, isn’t such a great thought; you are telling most of us something we already know. But it’s nice to have it reconfirmed! 
Get a real ISP, dude.
It could involve monkey shit.
You know, every time I see someone posting a bunch of new, yet valueless threads each day, I immediately think Magical Silver Key.
Move along, nothing more to see here.
Nothing to see but you just HAD to post… you are such a TWIT!
And I just have to ask: Does your face hurt?
I guess I shouldn’t tell you this, but use AOL Write to compose. Then paste. If AOL goes psssst!, like mine does, the letter window remains. Then you can sign on and continue insulting me without loosing a syllable. My AOL craps out a lot, but the other providers I was looking at went belly up.
Then perhaps you should be looking at different providers. Last time I checked, there were something like 3,900 ISPs in the U.S. If all of them have gone out of business, then I stand corrected and can only plead ignorance. 
I’m always flabbergasted by the number of otherwise seemingly intelligent people on this board who use AOL. If it sucks, DUMP IT! Jesus! It’s not like anyone is still using Windows for Workgroups 3.11! Dial-up networking in Win9x/Me is a fucking breeze to set up!
To sum it up:
My 71 year old grandmother is on Earthlink!
And the angels in Heaven floated down from on high, with Buhdda riding shot-gun and Mohammed in the sidecar.
And, lo, they spoke unto me… “Get thine ass off of AOL. Ye shall signeth up with EarthLink, and those who have looked down upon you shalt scoff no more.”
And I averted my eyes, and replied, “Really?”
The singing angels and assorted deities again said unto me, “What are you deaf? Yes, ditch fucking AOL. Besides, they’ll give you a free digital camera.”
And I in my devine awakening did just that. Now life is worth living again.
Amen.
OOOH!! What a great rant! [leaps to feet and applauds wildly]
Hot, passionate, and to the point–I give it a big 9.8. Solid.
*P.S. I always use WordPad for composing my magnum opuses. Then just Copy and Paste into the Reply window.
–magnum opi?*
I think it’s magni opera. Or possibly magna. Damn, my Latin’s rusty.
Here here! You and I are on the same page.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize AOL is fucked.
If you’re as bright as you seem, why the hell did you sign up with AOL? What part of their shitty service impressed you enough to go “Hey, I gotta get me some of that action?”. Finally, and most importantly, why the FUCK are you continuing to pay for this shit?
Dump 'em. Get a real ISP.
Or on the otherhand you can follow my example and skip the whole thought and proofreading part of your posts. That way you’ll only lose 5 minutes of effort.
Given GD sometimes, I’d say Soap Opera is more accurate, if not latin. 