Farewell, my old friend

[Chefguy]

I noticed that you were slowing down. You just weren't putting out the energy that made you such a loyal companion for all of these years. Your strength was waning, and I knew that the time was approaching when I would have to say goodbye. It was sad, and frustrating as well, to see that once-robust and responsive performance become lackluster.



But now it's time, my dear Makita. Your batteries no longer hold a charge and your torque is not up to the task. It's time to trade up to an 18v model and toss you on the trash-heap of history. We've driven a lot of screws over the years, and drilled a lot of virgin lumber, but it's over. Farewell, my old friend.

[Finagle]

Followed by a bunch of comforting comments about the rainbow bridge. We know the drill.

[Man With a Cat]

There's a hole in all our hearts thinking of your loss.

[lieu]

Remember before you and Makita hooked up when you had to do all your screwing by hand? Jeez, my forearms were huge from all that exertion.

I've had my own Makita for coming up on 15 years now. She's never failed me despite having been taken to task innumerable times and for every conceivable project. It'll be a sad day indeed when I have to trade her in on a newer model. Well, sad until that... you know... first screw.

Galvanized screws. I'd tap that.

[freckafree]

Originally Posted by Finagle

....We know the drill.

Bravo!

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by lieu

Galvanized screws. I'd tap that.

Not without a washer, surely.

[VunderBob]

This thread is boring.

[jayjay]

I was bracing myself for a bit of a tearjerker thread. This doesn't auger well...

[Sailboat]

Originally Posted by jayjay

I was bracing myself for a bit of a tearjerker thread.

Me too. It turned out to be only a drill, but I bit.

[Chefguy]

My drill's name was "Chuck". ::sob::

[Surly Chick]

Well, crap. I came in to chastise you for ditching your drill because she wasn't as young as she used to be and had lost some of her moves. Only to discover she's a he. Nevermind.

[Chronos]

And people thought I was odd for getting sentimental when my first scientific calculator died.

[Projammer]

Originally Posted by Chronos

And people thought I was odd for getting sentimental when my first scientific calculator died.

Well, when your number's up, it's up.

[Yllaria]

I'm going to send a thread link to my son. He had a more sudden loss recently when someone broke into the garage. No warning, just suddenly . . . the drill is gone.

[Cat Whisperer]

I wish I could get this worked up over my drill. I'm sort of eying new ones - I want to trade up to a more powerful one with a better recharging system.

[Finagle]

Originally Posted by Chronos

And people thought I was odd for getting sentimental when my first scientific calculator died.

I'm sure it reciprocated your feelings.

[jayjay]

Originally Posted by Chronos

And people thought I was odd for getting sentimental when my first scientific calculator died.

Oh, darn it to Hex! That's the square root of sad.

[Chefguy]

Oh Makita, tell me what's wrong;
You're constrained by your own charger.
We both know the problem is larger.
How I hate to see you like this;
There is no way you can deny it;
I can see that you're oh so sad, so quiet.*


*with apologies to Abba

[VunderBob]

Originally Posted by Projammer

Well, when your number's up, it's up.

Yeah. ChefGuy was screwed.

[Sunspace]

Back in the eighties, there was a particularly annoying song called Nakita. One of the great 1970s rockers had gone all mushy. We called it Makita: The Power Tool Song.

Edit: it was Nikita by Elton John. A far cry from classics like Funeral for a Friend.

[blondebear]

This thread is a bit much, but I'm not getting all torqued over it.

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by Surly Chick

Well, crap. I came in to chastise you for ditching your drill because she wasn't as young as she used to be and had lost some of her moves. Only to discover she's a he. Nevermind.

That's my other drill: La femme Makita

[Novelty Bobble]

I'd suggest a quiet burial, perhaps accompanied by "the Last (fence) post"

[ajdebosco]

The drill is gone
The drill is gone away
The drill is gone baby
The drill is gone away
You know you done me wrong baby
And you'll be sorry someday

The drill is gone
It's gone away from me
The drill is gone baby
The drill is gone away from me
Although I'll still live on
But so lonely I'll be

~with apologies to Rick Darnell & Roy Hawkins

[Meow Max]

I have a really nice Milwaukee Drill, serves me well to this day.
Best of all, it didn't cost me anything - I found it...
on Blueberry Hill...

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by Meow Max

I have a really nice Milwaukee Drill, serves me well to this day.
Best of all, it didn't cost me anything - I found it...
on Blueberry Hill...

I had one of those when I worked in the Philippines. It was the drillah in Manilla.

[outlierrn]

Originally Posted by VunderBob

This thread is boring.

What, you were expecting to find Jacking?

[Malacandra]

OP comes across as a tool.

[EvilTOJ]

Ahhh finally I can read a loss thread without getting all misty eyed. That's because of all the antihistamines in my system!

Originally Posted by Chronos

And people thought I was odd for getting sentimental when my first scientific calculator died.

Although this wasn't the root of the thread going downhill fast, it was certainly a sine that it was.

[picunurse]

Years ago, when we moved into this 70 year old house, we bought tools, new tools that thrilled us with their vivid colors, their interchangable batteries. The sander was my favorite, with all its different shapes for those tricky corners.

His was the drill, hardworking, reversible, pretty.

We shared batteries. Life was good. But, then it came time to work on the basement, with its 70 year old and counting concrete walls. The pretty tools couldn't cope.

I went to Hardwick's hardware store. The museum of hardware stores. There, behind the glass, I found the HAMMER DRILL from another age. It was heavy, it was black, and ugly. It came in a dull, black, metal case. It needed a cord transplant. I bought it for his birthday.

All the pretty tools have left us. The batteries died and new ones were no longer made.
The hammer drill is still here. It still crashes through walls whenever we ask it to.

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by picunurse

Years ago, when we moved into this 70 year old house, we bought tools, new tools that thrilled us with their vivid colors, their interchangable batteries. The sander was my favorite, with all its different shapes for those tricky corners.

His was the drill, hardworking, reversible, pretty.

We shared batteries. Life was good. But, then it came time to work on the basement, with its 70 year old and counting concrete walls. The pretty tools couldn't cope.

I went to Hardwick's hardware store. The museum of hardware stores. There, behind the glass, I found the HAMMER DRILL from another age. It was heavy, it was black, and ugly. It came in a dull, black, metal case. It needed a cord transplant. I bought it for his birthday.

All the pretty tools have left us. The batteries died and new ones were no longer made.
The hammer drill is still here. It still crashes through walls whenever we ask it to.

This sounds like the opening chapter of a new Cormac McCarthy novel: All The Pretty Tools.

[Chefguy]

I went out to the old haunt today: the garage where we had such good times together. I stood there as the sawdust motes glittered in the sunlight streaming through the window, and reflected upon my slovenly cleanup habits all the warm memories of projects gone by. The feel of her smooth shank in my hand, her warm body arching to my touch on her trigger, her ability to reverse out of any difficult situation.

I began to turn away - the memories being too painful and fresh - when my eye was caught by a small gleam in the recesses of our happy hallow. A small green light was winking feebly, yet persistently, trying to catch my attention. It was the light on her charger, calling to me from the grave. "Come closer, she whispered, for I would speak to you in dulcet tones of the love we once had." I approached with faint heart, reached out with trembling fingers, and yanked the fucking cord one last time.

[outlierrn]

Now you're just pulling our chain

[may_be_ignorant]

Originally Posted by Chefguy

and drilled a lot of virgin lumber

Ohhh the immature laugh I just experienced.