Have there been any rock stars who were monogamous during their entire career?

[Argent Towers]

I am a pretty firm believer in the idea that human males are not naturally monogamous, and that almost any man who is in a position to have easy sex with many different women without working very hard at it will do so. The best example of this is rock stars: it's considered basically a given that a man who becomes a successful rock musician will have unprecedented access to sex with however many women he wants. We live in a society where many women offer themselves sexually to men who are rich, famous or both, and rock stars as well as satisfying both of those criteria also often (though not always) have sex appeal to women outside of merely their success.

The result is that pretty much any red-blooded heterosexual male rock star who has women throwing themselves at him will take advantage of this situation and sleep with a lot of them. Let's face it, having sex with a new person is exciting. Possibly the most exciting kind of sex there is. What man wouldn't want to be able to experience this over and over and over with as many different women as he could? The sexual exploits of rock musicians, whether they're from the '60s, '70s, '80s, '90s or today, are famous and much-celebrated.

So have there been any rock stars who, despite the groupies offering themselves after every show, have actually managed to be completely monogamous and faithful to one steady girlfriend or wife over the course of an entire career? Even if someone was married several different times or went through various girlfriends, if he was sexually exclusive with only that one woman during the time they were together, he would qualify. Does anyone know if any rock star has resisted the temptations of the lifestyle and stuck with one partner at a time?

ETA: The definition of "rock star" is obviously up for debate. I'll say in this case it's someone who is well known enough that the average music fan has heard of him, and well known enough or part of a famous enough band that he wouldn't have to work very hard at seducing women.

[wedgehed]

Buddy Holly?

uh..........

Pat Boone?

[rhubarbarin]

Donny Osmund.

[Maggie the Ocelot]

I've heard that Paul & Linda McCartney never spent a night apart the entire time they were married. Not sure if it's true, or if he just snuck some in on the side when she wasn't around, but it's a possibility at least.

[pravnik]

Frank Zappa was married to Gail Zappa from 1967 until his death in 1993, and had four children with her, and there's no indication he was anything but faithful to her. He more or less eschewed the sex and drugs aspect of the rock and roll lifestyle.

[Chronos]

Everything you say about rock stars would also apply to professional athletes, and I'm pretty sure I've heard of several of them who were monogamous.

And sticking to musicians, wasn't John Lennon more-or-less faithful to Yoko Ono? At least, I've never heard otherwise.

[Dewey Finn]

Obviously, we can't know for sure, but Charlie Watts is reputed to have never slept with the groupies.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Originally Posted by Chronos

And sticking to musicians, wasn't John Lennon more-or-less faithful to Yoko Ono? At least, I've never heard otherwise.

Have you ever heard of John Lennon's "Lost Weekend" period?

He was most certainly NOT monogamous with Yoko Ono. (feel free to insert any "Well, who WOULD be faithful to Yoko Ono?" jokes here.......

[Argent Towers]

As an aside, isn't it krazy that we live in a world where the only way for a man to fulfill his biologically hard-wired destiny is to become either a rock star, a pro athlete, or a multi-millionaire?

[alphaboi867]

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

...We live in a society where many women offer themselves sexually to men who are rich, famous or both,...

Has there ever been a society where that wasn't the case?

[thelurkinghorror]

Originally Posted by MPB in Salt Lake

Have you ever heard of John Lennon's "Lost Weekend" period?

He was most certainly NOT monogamous with Yoko Ono. (feel free to insert any "Well, who WOULD be faithful to Yoko Ono?" jokes here.......

He certainly wasn't when with Cynthia. See "Norwegian Wood."

As far as the OPs premise, many people are willingly monogamous, and I don't think it can be discarded on a hunch. Proponents of this theory often point to the animal kingdom, but there are many examples (although much rarer than polygamy) of monogamous species. A lot of the research on this relies on evolutionary psychology BS, so it's hard to find clear results.

[RealityChuck]

Originally Posted by Maggie the Ocelot

I've heard that Paul & Linda McCartney never spent a night apart the entire time they were married. Not sure if it's true, or if he just snuck some in on the side when she wasn't around, but it's a possibility at least.

But in the early career (after the Beatles hit it big), Paul was with Jane Asher, and also entertained groupies. John also was pretty much sleeping around, even though he was married. They both settled down later, though.

Zappa also had an affair with Alice Stuart in the early days. Stuart says they were quite compatible emotionally, but were completely incompatible musically (she was more into traditional blues and has had a modest success as a solo artist). Zappa claims he fired her because she couldn't play "Louie, Louie," but that appears to be a joke.

Loudon Wainwright III doesn't appear to have any affairs, though his first marriage did break up.

[Blank Slate]

Bono started dating Alison Stewart in 1975 and they have been married since 1982. No idea if either have been completely faithful but I never heard otherwise. Unless The Sweetest Thing was about an affair.

[Robot Arm]

Originally Posted by thelurkinghorror

Proponents of this theory often point to the animal kingdom, but there are many examples (although much rarer than polygamy) of monogamous species.

Geese mate with a single partner for life, but when they have sex they still fantasize about other geese.

[Koxinga]

Originally Posted by thelurkinghorror

He certainly wasn't when with Cynthia. See "Norwegian Wood."

Heck, see "Yoko Ono."

[Fried Dough Ho]

Ringo has been married to Barbara for over 30 years...

[Guinastasia]

Originally Posted by Blank Slate

Bono started dating Alison Stewart in 1975 and they have been married since 1982. No idea if either have been completely faithful but I never heard otherwise. Unless The Sweetest Thing was about an affair.

No, it was about him forgetting her birthday:

The song was reportedly written by Bono as an apology to his wife Ali Hewson for having to work in the studio on her birthday during The Joshua Tree sessions. At Alison's request, profits from the single went to her favoured charity, Chernobyl Children's Project International.

And John Lennon had an affair during his marriage to Yoko that was arranged by Yoko herself, believe it or not.

[Snowboarder Bo]

Originally Posted by RealityChuck

Zappa also had an affair with Alice Stuart in the early days. Stuart says they were quite compatible emotionally, but were completely incompatible musically (she was more into traditional blues and has had a modest success as a solo artist). Zappa claims he fired her because she couldn't play "Louie, Louie," but that appears to be a joke.

Zappa wasn't married when he met Alice Stuart, tho. He and Kay Sherman divorced in 1964. He met Alice in 1965. And Frank and Gail were married in 1967.

[fuzzypickles]

The three members of Rush were pretty square. Even while on tour with KISS in the mid-70s, they would join the backstage groupie parties and "watch, but not participate" (according to Gene Simmons.)

[Drain Bead]

Jon Bon Jovi married his high school sweetheart and claims he's never cheated on her.

[thirdname]

I knew a guy who knew a guy who worked on Capitol Hill, who said that Al Gore was the only politician in DC who was faithful to his wife.

[lawoot]

Originally Posted by pravnik

Frank Zappa was married to Gail Zappa from 1967 until his death in 1993, and had four children with her, and there's no indication he was anything but faithful to her. He more or less eschewed the sex and drugs aspect of the rock and roll lifestyle.

Besides Alice Stuart, there was also Nigey Lennon, who claims to have had an affair with Frank, to the point of rooming with him on the 200 Motels tour. She even wrote a book about it.

Not to mention Moon's description of her dad as 'a monk... a monk with a taste for Groupies.'

[Edward The Head]

Dee Snider of Twisted Sister fame has been married to the same woman since 1981. I've never heard anything bad about his personal life.

[Hal Briston]

Originally Posted by Koxinga

Heck, see "Yoko Ono."

Really, I'd rather not.

[WhyNot]

It's an interesting question (which, of course, can never be definitively answered) but I'd beware of making a broader generalization re: monogamy and men based on the lives of rock stars. Rock stars, by definition, are people who thrive on attention, and therefore might be assumed to have a higher rate of infidelity than mere mortals who have no desire to be screamed at by crowds or admired by beautiful people.

In other words, saying, "Every man would have sex with many women if he could get them, look at rock stars," assumes that every man would be a rock star and live that sort of lifestyle if he could. Rock stars want to live like rock stars; many men would hate it and feel much happier with one woman, one car and one office to go to work to everyday.

(Yes, I still identify as poly by my nature, although I'm in and intend to stay in a monogamous relationship. I don't believe there's only one "natural" state for sexuality, though, and see no reason there should be. I don't like "nature" arguments for polyamory any more than I do for homosexuality.)

[Leaffan]

Originally Posted by Drain Bead

Jon Bon Jovi married his high school sweetheart and claims he's never cheated on her.

I thought we were talking about rock stars?

[Annie-Xmas]

George Harrison was supposedly faithful to Patti until he decided to sleep with Ringo's wife Maureen. When asked why, he said "Incest."

He apparently was faithful to second wife Olivia until his death.

[PunditLisa]

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

I am a pretty firm believer in the idea that human males are not naturally monogamous, and that almost any man who is in a position to have easy sex with many different women without working very hard at it will do so.

Wait a minute. You're trying to prove your theory that human males are not naturally monogamous by asking whether men in the most unnatural circumstances have ever remained monogamous?

If that's your method of proving your point, then I'd like to open up a poll of my own so that I can refute your conclusions. It'll target morbidly obese unemployed ex-cons who still live in their parent's basements.

Sound fair?

Note: 99% of males are not (Presidents of powerful nations, rock stars, pro athletes, famous actors, etc), and are therefore not candidates for "easy sex."
If you really want data to back your notion that "human males are not naturally monogamous," I think you'd have far more credibility if you didn't focus on the 1% who are statistical anomolies.

[kunilou]

Originally Posted by thirdname

I knew a guy who knew a guy who worked on Capitol Hill, who said that Al Gore was the only politician in DC who was faithful to his wife.

Yet Al and Tipper still broke up, which proves -- well, I guess it doesn't really prove anything.

[kenobi 65]

Originally Posted by Maggie the Ocelot

I've heard that Paul & Linda McCartney never spent a night apart the entire time they were married. Not sure if it's true, or if he just snuck some in on the side when she wasn't around, but it's a possibility at least.

McCartney spent 10 days in a Japanese jail in 1980 after being caught with marijuana in his luggage. So, I'd imagine that those would count as "nights apart", even if his only chance at groupies in that case would have been Japanese men.

[filling_pages]

Originally Posted by wedgehed

Buddy Holly?

You were probably going for a joke here, but Buddy Holly was only married for the last 6 months or so of his life. Maria, his wife, went on tour with him, so he didn't exactly have much of a chance to show if he'd be monogamous or not in the long run.

That being said, before he married he seemed to have taken up the offers of many a groupie. I've even heard that he once had a threesome with a girl and Little Richard (they were on tour together), but that could be an urban legend.

[pravnik]

Originally Posted by lawoot

Besides Alice Stuart, there was also Nigey Lennon, who claims to have had an affair with Frank, to the point of rooming with him on the 200 Motels tour. She even wrote a book about it.

Not to mention Moon's description of her dad as 'a monk... a monk with a taste for Groupies.'

In that case, I got nothin'.

[Shodan]

Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas

George Harrison was supposedly faithful to Patti until he decided to sleep with Ringo's wife Maureen. When asked why, he said "Incest."

I don't understand what this means. Hint?

Regards,
Shodan

[Maastricht]

Originally Posted by Blank Slate

Bono started dating Alison Stewart in 1975 and they have been married since 1982. No idea if either have been completely faithful but I never heard otherwise. ..

IIRC, most of the band members of U2 usually had their wives and families with them on tour. Bono said it saved their marriages, and thus the stability of the band.

[astorian]

Obviously, we can't possibly know who's been perfectly faithful and who hasn't. All we can know is who's stayed married a long time.

We've already heard about Charlie Watts, Bono and Jon Bon Jovi.

One other name is Dennis De Young, lead singer of Styx, who's been married to Suzanne, his high school girlfriend, since 1970. Was he 100% faithful? Who knows- but some years back, I read an interview with Styx bassist Chuck Panozzo, who's openly gay. He was asked if it was weird to be around so many horny female groupies, and he said that was never really an issue with Styx, because most of the other guys in the band had gotten married young and usually brought their wives on tour with them. Chuck didn't seem to think anyone in the band except (single) Tommy Shaw was picking up groupies.

I've already told this story on other threads, but in the Sixties, Bill Wyman kept a log book showing how many girls each of the Rolling Stones had scored with. By the time he stopped keeping count, Brian Jones was the clear “winner,” with Wyman in second, and Mick/Keith neck and neck for third. But Wyman had a zero next to Watts’ name, because Watts didn’t play around.

Watts wasn’t a saint- he certainly had serious issues with booze and drugs. But his bandmates vouch that he was a faithful husband.

[astorian]

Originally Posted by Edward The Head

Dee Snider of Twisted Sister fame has been married to the same woman since 1981. I've never heard anything bad about his personal life.

Every now and then, Dee likes to take a poke at Al and Tipper Gore, pointing out that, unike the Gores, the Sniders are still married, and none of their kids has ever been in trouble with the law.

[lindsaybluth]

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

As an aside, isn't it krazy that we live in a world where the only way for a man to fulfill his biologically hard-wired destiny is to become either a rock star, a pro athlete, or a multi-millionaire?

Methinks you are single and with a tenuous knowledge of history.

[Argent Towers]

Just celebrated my 5th anniversary...and have a bachelor's in history. Very wrong on both counts.

[Little Nemo]

Vince Furnier (aka Alice Cooper) has said that he has never cheated on his wife Sheryl (they married in 1976).

[Koxinga]

Originally Posted by astorian

Every now and then, Dee likes to take a poke at Al and Tipper Gore, pointing out that, unike the Gores, the Sniders are still married, and none of their kids has ever been in trouble with the law.

Alice Cooper also seems to be a pretty square guy, married 30+ years, three kids, born again Christian. "In a 2002 television interview, Cooper claimed that he had "never cheated" on his wife in all the time they had been together. In the same interview, he also claimed that the secret to a lasting and successful relationship is to continue going out on dates with your partner."

[Koxinga]

Jinx! Buy me a Coke! (punches Little Nemo in the arm)

[Argent Towers]

And...in my study of history, the phenomenon of the parades of mistresses and concubines of so many of the most powerful men throughout the ages has swayed me towards thinking that in the majority of the time, a man who is sufficiently powerful will feed his urge for sexual promiscuity, regardless of the religious or social strictures around him. Rock stars to me fall into the same category of kings and emperors in history in terms of their influence and appeal. But the basic concept remains the same: man of power, status and wealth = easy availability of women.

I do believe that the majority of human males would have sex with many different women if they could. By "if they could" I mean both if they were able to attract these women to them sexually, and also if they could do so hypothetically without the objection of their wives or significant others. Many men would not want to cheat on their wives (although some obviously have no problem with it) but if this first category of men could, somehow, by some magical genie's command, have sex with a lot of different attractive women and have their wives not mind it, they would.

I do believe it is more or less hard wired into a male human's DNA to want to do this.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Originally Posted by Koxinga

Alice Cooper also seems to be a pretty square guy, married 30+ years, three kids, born again Christian.

Quick hijack

I know virtually nothing about Alice Cooper's life, music or religion, but isn't his whole schtick a faux-Satanic-possessed persona, with whole albums that are themed with such subjects as serial killers, various occult practices, human sacrifice, necrophillia, etc.?

How can that possibly jibe with being a practicing Christian?

I assume that the answer I will hear is that it's all an act, and he is merely playing a role, just like an actor who portrays an evil character, but to me it seems that it's almost impossible to square the two diametrically opposed parts of his life.

[Ogre]

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

And...in my study of history, the phenomenon of the parades of mistresses and concubines of so many of the most powerful men throughout the ages has swayed me towards thinking that in the majority of the time, a man who is sufficiently powerful will feed his urge for sexual promiscuity, regardless of the religious or social strictures around him. Rock stars to me fall into the same category of kings and emperors in history in terms of their influence and appeal. But the basic concept remains the same: man of power, status and wealth = easy availability of women.

I do believe that the majority of human males would have sex with many different women if they could. By "if they could" I mean both if they were able to attract these women to them sexually, and also if they could do so hypothetically without the objection of their wives or significant others. Many men would not want to cheat on their wives (although some obviously have no problem with it) but if this first category of men could, somehow, by some magical genie's command, have sex with a lot of different attractive women and have their wives not mind it, they would.

I do believe it is more or less hard wired into a male human's DNA to want to do this.

Can you please take this somewhere else? Your argument has diverged rather widely from the topic of the thread.

[Ogre]

Originally Posted by MPB in Salt Lake

Quick hijack

I know virtually nothing about Alice Cooper's life, music or religion, but isn't his whole schtick a faux-Satanic-possessed persona, with whole albums that are themed with such subjects as serial killers, various occult practices, human sacrifice, necrophillia, etc.?

How can that possibly jibe with being a practicing Christian?

I assume that the answer I will hear is that it's all an act, and he is merely playing a role, just like an actor who portrays an evil character, but to me it seems that it's almost impossible to square the two diametrically opposed parts of his life.

Why? Can't a Christian actor play a heinous monster in a movie or a TV show?

[Koxinga]

Originally Posted by MPB in Salt Lake

Quick hijack

I know virtually nothing about Alice Cooper's life, music or religion, but isn't his whole schtick a faux-Satanic-possessed persona, with whole albums that are themed with such subjects as serial killers, various occult practices, human sacrifice, necrophillia, etc.?

How can that possibly jibe with being a practicing Christian?

I assume that the answer I will hear is that it's all an act, and he is merely playing a role, just like an actor who portrays an evil character, but to me it seems that it's almost impossible to square the two diametrically opposed parts of his life.

I dunno; but maybe the defintion of a "practicing Christian" can encompass more than you suppose. If he's faithful to his family, treats other people the way he'd want to be treated and doesn't lie, cheat or steal, looks to me like he's already way ahead of a lot of ostentatious Bible thumpers out there.

[Leaffan]

Originally Posted by MPB in Salt Lake

Quick hijack

I know virtually nothing about Alice Cooper's life, music or religion, but isn't his whole schtick a faux-Satanic-possessed persona, with whole albums that are themed with such subjects as serial killers, various occult practices, human sacrifice, necrophillia, etc.?

How can that possibly jibe with being a practicing Christian?

I assume that the answer I will hear is that it's all an act, and he is merely playing a role, just like an actor who portrays an evil character, but to me it seems that it's almost impossible to square the two diametrically opposed parts of his life.

Alice Cooper is a stage act.

Vincent Furnier is a husband, father, golfer, and pretty decent guy.

[lindsaybluth]

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

Just celebrated my 5th anniversary...

Then you must be very unhappy.

Originally Posted by Argent Towers

Many men would not want to cheat on their wives (although some obviously have no problem with it) but if this first category of men could, somehow, by some magical genie's command, have sex with a lot of different attractive women and have their wives not mind it, they would.

Bolding mine. That's not what you said (or implied) to begin with, and it's 100% different. Hell, I'd have sex with multiple other dudes if my SO wouldn't mind it. But what stops me is if I did decide to have sex with other dudes I would suffer in my relationship with him and no longer be allowed to sleep with him. Worse, I'd lose his companionship. I think you underestimate how much this is a two-sided coin here.

Also hijack:

I was on a flight with Bono once and he was in the waiting area with the rest of us schlubs for an hour ahead of boarding. Now, he and I were off in a less-populated seating area virtually alone. I didn't even recognize him till I heard him start talking on his cell phone (I mean, who in Atlanta has an Irish accent?) The phone conversation was with his wife and was too cute for words. It's certainly not proof he's faithful but it certainly seemed he was inclined towards it.

[MPB in Salt Lake]

Originally Posted by Koxinga

I dunno; but maybe the defintion of a "practicing Christian" can encompass more than you suppose. If he's faithful to his family, treats other people the way he'd want to be treated and doesn't lie, cheat or steal, looks to me like he's already way ahead of a lot of ostentatious Bible thumpers out there.

I actually agree with you, but his whole career seems to celebrate and glorify murder, Satanism, chaos and evil---I don't think that he is ACTUALLY a murderer, or an evil man, etc. but for his music to fixate on only those type subjects (which I will gladly acknowledge will sell a lot more albums than Born-Again Christian themed music would) seems impossible to reconcile.

If an actor refused to take on ANY roles except for evil, depraved monsters, for their entire acting career, I would have trouble believing that he was serious about being a Born Again Christian (or a observant Orthodox Jew or a practicing Muslim).


ETA---I am not looking for a serious debate, or trying to bash Alice Cooper, this is just something I have a bit of trouble wrapping my head around, and I assumed that Dopers would respond as you have so far.

Thanks for your input!!!!

[Argent Towers]

Originally Posted by lindsaybluth

Bolding mine. That's not what you said (or implied) to begin with, and it's 100% different. Hell, I'd have sex with multiple other dudes if my SO wouldn't mind it. But what stops me is if I did decide to have sex with other dudes I would suffer in my relationship with him and no longer be allowed to sleep with him. Worse, I'd lose his companionship. I think you underestimate how much this is a two-sided coin here.

Could you please explain what exactly you think I said or implied to begin with? I'm having trouble understanding where you're coming from here. By "not monogamous" I did not necessarily mean "unfaithful." I also meant "not in a committed relationship with one person."