Being the mental boyfriend, I am there for emotional support and having a rich relationship. The back story is this: we met two years ago and she was my first hug, hand hold, kiss, etc. I bought her tons of gifts to lead up to telling her I loved her, and then I told her I loved her after a month and wanted to try having sex. She told me she ruined too many relationships because having sex with someone takes away from the mental aspect of the relationship. She wanted me to stay a pure virgin and love her as much as I always did.
Anyways, today I was walking through the hallway at school and I took out my Droid, which has a picture of me and her on the lock screen. This guy was looking down at me from above on the second floor and started laughing at me for some reason. I turned around and he winked at me, and I realized he had perfect view of my phone.
So I went home and explained how he looked to my girlfriend and asked her if it was him, and she was giggling and wouldn’t tell me yes or no. She told me I shouldn’t know who it is because it will mess up the dynamics of our relationship for when we get married.
What do you guys think? Do I have the right to know now that I have most likely seen who the physical boyfriend is?
Why in the world would you have the “right” to know who your friend is dating?
ETA, you do realize that you’re not her boyfriend, right? You are ‘the friend’ which means, in all likelihood, you will never date her. She’ll keep you thinking it might happen someday, but in actuality, you’ll always be the person she just uses to complain about her boyfriends to.
Do you have the right to no longer be her boyfriend if you’re not okay with that (or anything else in your relationship)? Absolutely yes. And she has the same right.
Look…just about anything is okay in a relationship as long as everyone in the relationship is okay with it. I’m sensing you’re not okay with the way she’s treating you (and I can’t say that I blame you. I’m polyamorous, but I would not tolerate a partner laughing at me when I asked for some simple information about their other lover(s).)
This OP is so bizarre. I’ll tell you what’s going to mess up your marriage dynamic. It’s the fact that your future wife is screwing other guys while expecting you to be “pure” and faithful towards her.
You are mental. You are a doormat not a boyfriend. Everytime she screws up she’ll make herself feel better by wiping her feet on you. If this is real. I doubt it, but you should seek professional help if it is.
So, you’re into the whole cuckold fantasy thing eh?
If that’s what you’re into I get it, but don’t delude yourself into thinking this girl is actually going to marry you (unless you somehow get rich; then she may decide to siphon off you while continuing to bang other dudes).
Dude, you’re making things harder on yourself with this girl. I mean, not only is it nearly impossible to get past the “friend” stage, you’re also giving her a reason never to want to.
You’re probably thinking, “if I’m there for her through anything she’ll see how much she needs me and leave her uncaring boyfriend.”
No. Why would she do that? She’s getting her physical needs met by not-you while you’re meeting her emotional needs. You are her friend whore. Her emotional booty call. The status quo is working perfectly for her.
