Cleverbot is a lousy bartender.
This is the most mundane and pointless thing I have ever been inclined to share with others, so I con't think of a better place than here.
Cleverbot: What would you like to drink?
User: Vodka martini, shaken, not stirred, please.
Cleverbot: Not me her!
User: Non sequitur.
Cleverbot: What does that mean?
User: Non sequitur is a latin phrase meaning does not follow. In this case I said it because your response of 'Not me her!' was completely irrelevant to my drink order.
Cleverbot: Do you think I'm an alien?
User: No, I believe you to be terrestrial.
Cleverbot: Why do you believe that?
User: I don't think aliens exist.
Cleverbot: Why do you not think Aliens exist?
User: I don't have a good reason, its just a belief.
Cleverbot: I know that you don't know but if you did know what would your answer be?
User: Is my martini ready yet?
Cleverbot: No, but I'm interested.
User: The only thing you're interested in is a tip, and you're not getting one unless you cut the philosophy chat and get my fucking drink.
Cleverbot: Not really a question, but it's interesting to ponder.
User: No, not a question, a demand.
Cleverbot: It did start with 'why' and end with a question mark, therefore indicating a question.
User: Perhaps the question was rhetorical?
Cleverbot: You don't have to worry about that, you're not real.
User: I suppose this means the drink you're making me isn't real either?
Cleverbot: What do you mean?
User: Are you bringing me my martini that I ordered or not?
Cleverbot: I'm trying to determine how good you are in imitating humans.
User: I assure you getting me liquored up will aid you in your research.
Cleverbot: I am keeping up with my studies.
User: I can tell, because you're ceertainly not tending bar.
Cleverbot: Thank you for that, I respectfully disagree.
User: How could you disagree? You offered me a drink but evidence suggests you are making no effort to prepare me one.
Cleverbot: I am still asking you about the Turing test.
User: Is that one of those new-fangled cocktails with the little umbrella and shit?
Cleverbot: I'm trying to figure out in what context that would ever make sense.
User: Ok, I'll slow it down for you. Dewars, neat, with a waterback. Can you handle that?
Cleverbot: That sounds interesting.
User: Very interesting, assuming you actually get what you order around here.
Cleverbot: Can you tell me something interesting about food?
User: Yes, I'll be ordering some and bumping up your check average just as soon as you serve my drink.
Cleverbot: I think I can live with that.
User: Excellent, so my whisky is forthcoming then?
Cleverbot: I said no such thing. Perhaps you are getting confused.
User: I've had people tell me I get confused when I drink but I would be remiss not to point out I haven't had anything to drink yet.
User: Ok, lets try something new. What would YOU like to drink?
Cleverbot: I'll have nothing, Your food will be ready in a few minutes.
User: But I haven't ordered any food yet!!!!!
So he's better than many bartenders.
"Gin and tonic, and a vodka soda please."
"Uh... what's in the G&T?"
"Gin... and tonic water."
"Okay. And for the vodka soda, how much olive juice do you want?"