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  #1  
Old 02-21-2012, 10:29 PM
Biggirl Biggirl is offline
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I can't stand your face, celeb.

There are some celebrities whose faces bother me. Not because they are particularly ugly but because, well, I just do not like them. The faces, that is. I have my reasons. Here, I'll list them for you.

Robin Tunney. Her face is not symmetrical. I know, I know. . . nobody's face is symmetrical but her's is so out of wack that it makes me uncomfortable. If there was only a way I could watch The Mentalist and not get twitchy whenever I look at Robin's lopsided face.


Chris O'Donnell. Mr. Smirky McPunchyerface has no idea how to smile. None at all. Gah! He takes away all the joy of watching LL Cool J be all hunky without the lip smacking. LL is mighty fine when he's not licking his lips all the time. O'Donell, however, I wanna kick in the nuts. His every emotion is conveyed with that stupid smirk.


Damian Lewis What the hell is that thing under his nose? There should be a mouth there but instead there is a lipless maw of unrelenting horror. It's as if he sucked all the lemons that existed in the world at once. I find his lack of mouth so disturbing that I can't watching Homeland.

Surely I'm not the only person this superficial. Who else is bothered by a celebrities face?
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  #2  
Old 02-21-2012, 10:51 PM
dropzone dropzone is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Biggirl View Post
Damian Lewis What the hell is that thing under his nose? There should be a mouth there but instead there is a lipless maw of unrelenting horror. It's as if he sucked all the lemons that existed in the world at once. I find his lack of mouth so disturbing that I can't watching Homeland.
(shrug) He's a Ginger. I've had to put up with the many ways they are misshapen all my life.
Quote:
Surely I'm not the only person this superficial.
This is The Dope and we are ALL that superficial. It's why we need this outlet, because family, friends, and the general population would give us shit for it.
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  #3  
Old 02-21-2012, 10:56 PM
WOOKINPANUB WOOKINPANUB is offline
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I have lots of these but I'll start with the first one that always comes to mind when I think "she's gorgeous but I hate her face" . Keira Knightly is undeniably gorgeous in still photos, which is why I couldn't find a better example, but she has exactly one facial expression when acting; the angry, set jaw scowl. No matter what she's trying to convey she seems like she's talking through gritted teeth.

Something about Jennifer Hudson has always irritated the hell out of me.

I hate, hate, hated Connie Britton in "American Horror Story" and looked forward to her painful death.

And who didn't want to toss Francis Fisher overboard in "Titanic". Granted, her role was not supposed to be sympathetic so it may be to her credit that I felt revulsion for her.

And the girly fan favorite Taylor Lautner is an absolute mystery to me.

Okay, that's enough superficial hate for me tonight. I'll be back tomorrow with more petty venom.
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  #4  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:04 PM
Biggirl Biggirl is offline
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Francis Fisher always looks like she's getting over a cold and Taylor Lautner looks like a pig smelling shit.

Which reminds me of Renee Zellweger, who always looks like she's smelling cabbage cooking.
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  #5  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:25 PM
Rushgeekgirl Rushgeekgirl is offline
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GEORGE CLOONEY! Just looking at his head bobbing smirk makes me grit my teeth.
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  #6  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:26 PM
twickster twickster is offline
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Renee Zellwegger and her eternal squint.
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  #7  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:31 PM
Alice The Goon Alice The Goon is offline
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Dax Shepard. So gross. Almost ruins Parenthood for me.
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  #8  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:32 PM
Alice The Goon Alice The Goon is offline
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Originally Posted by Rushgeekgirl View Post
GEORGE CLOONEY! Just looking at his head bobbing smirk makes me grit my teeth.

I would be happy to take him off your hands.
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  #9  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:38 PM
Mosier Mosier is offline
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Minnie Driver has five pounds of gauze stuffed in her jowels.
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  #10  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:39 PM
Biggirl Biggirl is offline
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Originally Posted by Alice The Goon View Post
Dax Shepard. So gross. Almost ruins Parenthood for me.
Your link didn't work for me so I looked (what turned out to be) him up. I don't know why I was expecting a girl. Probably because Dax on Deep Space 9 was mostly a girl. Anyway. . .

[url="http://www.entertainmentwallpaper.com/images/photo/dax_shepard.jpg"]Lopsided! Arrggh![/url]

Last edited by Marley23; 02-22-2012 at 09:22 AM.. Reason: Note: a poster reported getting an antivirus warning after clicking this link
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  #11  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:41 PM
Duckster Duckster is offline
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Originally Posted by twickster View Post
Renee Zellwegger and her eternal squint.
Leann Rimes.

Then there's Sarah Jessica Parker.
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  #12  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:43 PM
Alice The Goon Alice The Goon is offline
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Originally Posted by Mosier View Post
Minnie Driver has five pounds of gauze stuffed in her jowels.
Like Bethanny Frankel, who I think actually has gills.
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  #13  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:49 PM
Laggard Laggard is offline
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Owen Wilson and his amazing stupid nose.
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  #14  
Old 02-21-2012, 11:50 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
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The dude who plays Larry David's brother. His ugly puss is showing up everywhere. I can't watch 'Luck' because of him.

nth Sarah Jessica Parker.

Cameron Diaz: she looks like a lamprey eel.

Sarah Palin: there's something about that mouth that just says "cruel".

Last edited by Chefguy; 02-21-2012 at 11:51 PM..
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  #15  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:34 AM
Cat Whisperer Cat Whisperer is offline
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Kim Raver - I think she's supposed to be drop-dead gorgeous, but there is something weird going on with her face.
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  #16  
Old 02-22-2012, 02:37 AM
BigT BigT is offline
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Paris Hilton's head has always looked to small for her body to me.
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  #17  
Old 02-22-2012, 03:01 AM
Toucanna Toucanna is offline
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Wilford Brimley.
The kid who starred in the American Pie movies. I so want to smack that leering clueless smirk off his face.
S.J. Parker: "she looks like a foot!"
And so so many more...
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  #18  
Old 02-22-2012, 06:24 AM
singular1 singular1 is offline
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Ryan Gosling looks like his head was squashed between two cinder blocks.
Christian Bale has a cruel mouth.
I can't stand watching either of these two in anything.
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  #19  
Old 02-22-2012, 06:55 AM
Rick Rick is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duckster View Post

Then there's Sarah Jessica Parker.
that's her on the right, right?
__________________
Remember this motto to live by: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather one should aim to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, glass of Scotch in the other, your body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO! Man, what a ride!"
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  #20  
Old 02-22-2012, 07:40 AM
LaurenIpsum LaurenIpsum is offline
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For some reason, I am really irritated by people with downward-pointing eyebrows. However, I'm not bothered by Sam Donaldson, but there are others:

Salman Rushdie. With those eyebrows, every time he smiles, it looks like a smirk and I just want to punch him in the face.

Rachel Zoe

I'm sure there are more, I just can't think of them at the moment.

Last edited by LaurenIpsum; 02-22-2012 at 07:40 AM..
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  #21  
Old 02-22-2012, 07:57 AM
Alka Seltzer Alka Seltzer is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chefguy View Post
Sarah Palin: there's something about that mouth that just says "cruel".
That would be the words she speaks.

And yes, this thread is as superficial as a cosmetics advert.
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  #22  
Old 02-22-2012, 08:07 AM
Alka Seltzer Alka Seltzer is offline
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I'll add, if anyone actually thinks someone can really have a "cruel mouth" or "smug eyebrows", they should book themselves an appointment with a retrophrenologist.
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  #23  
Old 02-22-2012, 08:37 AM
hogarth hogarth is offline
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Originally Posted by Cat Whisperer View Post
Kim Raver - I think she's supposed to be drop-dead gorgeous, but there is something weird going on with her face.
I feel the same about Scarlett Johansson. Something about her cheekbones and her chin just doesn't add up for me.
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  #24  
Old 02-22-2012, 08:46 AM
Fear Itself Fear Itself is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hogarth View Post
I feel the same about Scarlett Johansson. Something about her cheekbones and her chin just doesn't add up for me.
I never noticed she even had a face...
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  #25  
Old 02-22-2012, 08:51 AM
Eve Eve is offline
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Ryan Reynolds may be a perfectly nice young man--but that entitled, smug, frat-boy smirk of his makes me want to slap him till he cries like a little girl.
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  #26  
Old 02-22-2012, 08:54 AM
DCnDC DCnDC is offline
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Originally Posted by Laggard View Post
Owen Wilson and his amazing stupid nose.
I've never understood why he's the more famous one. His brother is both non-deformed and much funnier.

Then there's this guy. There's something not quite right about him that I just can't put my finger on.
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  #27  
Old 02-22-2012, 09:13 AM
Son of a Rich Son of a Rich is offline
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Nancy Grace and her evil scowl. Bitch
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  #28  
Old 02-22-2012, 09:56 AM
Max Torque Max Torque is online now
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Drew Barrymore's goddamned permanent smirk. Can she not speak without smirking?
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  #29  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:25 AM
Simplicio Simplicio is offline
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Crista Miller in the later seasons of Scrubs. I'm not sure if she had plastic surgery or over-did the Botox or had a mild stroke or what, but she went from being very cute and normal looking to having a weird, immobile facial expression that made looking at her kind of off-putting.
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  #30  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:32 AM
Huerta88 Huerta88 is offline
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Originally Posted by BigT View Post
Paris Hilton's head has always looked to small for her body to me.
Combine that with tilting it at some retarded angle as she often does when posing, the insipid simpering smirky smile she usually affects, and what I swear is a stroke victim droopy eye on one side, and she's my vote.
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  #31  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:36 AM
Drain Bead Drain Bead is offline
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Originally Posted by twickster View Post
Renee Zellwegger and her eternal squint.
Provided without comment.

Justin Chatwin, the guy who plays Steve on Shameless, is my contribution to the thread. He has the Minnie Driver giant cheeks problem, plus buck teeth and a fivehead.
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  #32  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:38 AM
cjepson cjepson is offline
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Taylor Swift. There's something about her eyes that I find really frightening. They look like android eyes or something.
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  #33  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:39 AM
Edward The Head Edward The Head is offline
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Originally Posted by WOOKINPANUB View Post
I hate, hate, hated Connie Britton in "American Horror Story" and looked forward to her painful death.
Pistols at dawn my good man.

Angelina Jolie has never done anything for me, her lips are too big and distracting.
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  #34  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:45 AM
Jophiel Jophiel is offline
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I don't typically say "I can't believe I'm the first to mention..." but I can't believe I'm the first to mention Shannen Doherty and her crooked eyes.
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  #35  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:49 AM
mhendo mhendo is offline
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Add me to the Owen Wilson list.

I've missed what were probably some decent movies because i stand stand to look at his face.
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  #36  
Old 02-22-2012, 10:50 AM
DiggitCamara DiggitCamara is offline
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Sandra Oh. I'll never watch the show because I'd have to look at her
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  #37  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:00 PM
cjepson cjepson is offline
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Originally Posted by DiggitCamara View Post
Sandra Oh. I'll never watch the show because I'd have to look at her
Takes all kinds, I guess... I like how she looks.
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  #38  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:17 PM
Cat Whisperer Cat Whisperer is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Simplicio View Post
Crista Miller in the later seasons of Scrubs. I'm not sure if she had plastic surgery or over-did the Botox or had a mild stroke or what, but she went from being very cute and normal looking to having a weird, immobile facial expression that made looking at her kind of off-putting.
Courtney Cox apparently got Crista Miller's plastic surgeon's number from her - watching "Cougar Town" last night, they were both in the same scene in close-up, and my thoughts were along the lines of, "That's a whole lotta plastic surgery we're seeing there." (And not a lot of movement around the lips and eyes.)
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  #39  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:20 PM
Laggard Laggard is offline
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Jay from Silent Bob and Jay. Just the thought of him unleashes a hatred in me that I seldom feel.
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  #40  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:25 PM
Intergalactic Gladiator Intergalactic Gladiator is offline
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Originally Posted by twickster View Post
Renee Zellwegger and her eternal squint.
Oh yeah, Pasty McSquinty Squeak.
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  #41  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:33 PM
Cat Whisperer Cat Whisperer is offline
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Ryan Gosling - is this really the face of one of the hottest men alive?

Then there's Adrien Brody who, in spite of his very weird face, I still find sexy. No accounting for taste.
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  #42  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:35 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
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Malcolm McDowell, at least in the old days. What a ham.
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  #43  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:39 PM
lisacurl lisacurl is offline
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Originally Posted by Cat Whisperer View Post
Ryan Gosling - is this really the face of one of the hottest men alive?
I think Ryan Gosling is the John Cusack of his generation. He's character-actor attractive, but achieved leading-man status based on his role in one film which was important to a lot of young women when they were at an impressionable age or level of maturity ("Say Anything" for Cusack; "The Notebook" for Gosling).
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  #44  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:40 PM
TreacherousCretin TreacherousCretin is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fear Itself View Post
I never noticed she even had a face...
Probably because she never moves any part of it, especially when she's "acting." As well as two very big other reasons.

.

.
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  #45  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:41 PM
alice_in_wonderland alice_in_wonderland is offline
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Originally Posted by Intergalactic Gladiator View Post
Oh yeah, Pasty McSquinty Squeak.
Yep - I can't stand watching her in ANYTHING - not a movie, not an awards show, not caught by paparatzi buying a slurpie.

Ugh. I want to slap the stupid look off her face every time I see her. I realize this is not rational.
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  #46  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:49 PM
TreacherousCretin TreacherousCretin is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twickster View Post
Renee Zellwegger and her eternal squint.
She looks like someone is holding a small turd under her nose.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alice The Goon View Post
Like Bethanny Frankel, who I think actually has gills.
I almost choked when I read this, and again when I saw the picture.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BigT View Post
Paris Hilton's head has always looked to small for her body to me.
Yet still too big for her brain.

This thread is shallow and mean-spirited. I'm loving it.
.
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  #47  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:50 PM
brainstall brainstall is offline
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Add me to the Owen Wilson camp. Not sure if it's his nose or his mouth that bugs me most.
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  #48  
Old 02-22-2012, 12:51 PM
Infovore Infovore is offline
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Benicio Del Toro. I don't get how anybody thinks this man is sexy. His face is ugly and he always looks like he needs a shower and a hair wash.

Pat Robertson (does he count as a celeb?) I can't stand his weird ears and his bulging forehead and his voice. (And if you're wondering why I ever even see him, we used to turn on "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" to go to sleep to, and the 700 Club was on right before it so occasionally I would switch over it a bit early, just in time to see him earnestly praying over some old woman's bunions or digestive problems or something. I couldn't change the channel fast enough).

John Travolta. I don't like his smirky mouth or his jowly face. I didn't think he was sexy back in the days of Vinnie Barbarino, and I still don't.

I kinda used to have the problem with Brad Pitt, but he's improved with age. I still don't think he's attractive, but I no longer think he's ugly.
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  #49  
Old 02-22-2012, 01:09 PM
DCnDC DCnDC is offline
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Originally Posted by Infovore View Post
Benicio Del Toro. I don't get how anybody thinks this man is sexy. His face is ugly and he always looks like he needs a shower and a hair wash.
I always thought he looked like Brad Pitt, beaten with an ugly stick. You be the judge.
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  #50  
Old 02-22-2012, 01:14 PM
Sister Vigilante Sister Vigilante is offline
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I have nothing to add, except that the Robin Tunney pic has scarred me for life.
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