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  #1  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:15 PM
dhkendall dhkendall is offline
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In which we explore sexually permissive women

A thought occurred to me today: what is the difference between the terms MILF and cougar to describe a "mature" woman on the prowl for younger men to date? The former seems to imply the woman must have kids, while the latter doesn't, but I have seen the former applied to women without kids (or whose parenting status is unknown).

So, is there a difference? Are they interchangeable?

(And, no, this isn't a "Need Answer Fast" situation, in case you were wondering. )

Last edited by dhkendall; 03-30-2012 at 05:16 PM..
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  #2  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:19 PM
pulykamell pulykamell is online now
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I would say your interpretation is correct.
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  #3  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:22 PM
Sunspace Sunspace is offline
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I was under the impression that a MILF was not necessarily looking for a younger man, while a cougar was.

Last edited by Sunspace; 03-30-2012 at 05:22 PM..
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  #4  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:23 PM
leahcim leahcim is online now
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I thought "MILF" was applicable to any M you'd like to F, whether or not she is particularly looking for that kind of attention, while "Cougar" is applied only to those who are looking for that kind of attention (and, of course, applies to non-mothers as well).
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  #5  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:27 PM
Blake Blake is offline
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The biggest mistake you are making is assuming that either of those terms refers to sexually permissive women. They don't.

A MILF is a woman of a certain age who is sexually attractive. The term does not imply in any way that she is sexually available. A MILF may be happily married and completely monogamaous, or she may even be celibate. It just refers to a woman that you'd like to fuck, Not one that you necessarily have any hope at all of fucking.

A Cougar is a woman of a certain age who is attracted to younger men. The term says nothing about attractiveness, though it often implies that the woman is attractive. It also says nothing about sexual availability. Though the term has a vague connotation of someone who is happily single, a cougar may be married to a younger man.
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Old 03-30-2012, 05:27 PM
ZenBeam ZenBeam is offline
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Right, the two terms are orthogonal. Cougars want young men. Young men want MILFs.

ETA: A cougar may also be married to a man her own age, but still on the prowl for a young conquest.

Last edited by ZenBeam; 03-30-2012 at 05:29 PM..
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  #7  
Old 03-30-2012, 05:32 PM
Snowboarder Bo Snowboarder Bo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blake View Post
The biggest mistake you are making is assuming that either of those terms refers to sexually permissive women. They don't.

A MILF is a woman of a certain age who is sexually attractive. The term does not imply in any way that she is sexually available. A MILF may be happily married and completely monogamaous, or she may even be celibate. It just refers to a woman that you'd like to fuck, Not one that you necessarily have any hope at all of fucking.

A Cougar is a woman of a certain age who is attracted to younger men. The term says nothing about attractiveness, though it often implies that the woman is attractive. It also says nothing about sexual availability. Though the term has a vague connotation of someone who is happily single, a cougar may be married to a younger man.
Pretty much a spot-on perfect explanation of the terms. If the bolded part had been omitted, it would be totally perfect. I say this only because a cougar may be married to any man of any age at all; the defining characteristic that makes her a cougar is her attraction to younger men.
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Old 03-30-2012, 05:53 PM
Irishman Irishman is offline
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Originally Posted by Blake View Post
A Cougar is a woman of a certain age who is attracted to younger men. The term says nothing about attractiveness, though it often implies that the woman is attractive. It also says nothing about sexual availability.

I would argue that the label "cougar" implies a certain level of searching for younger male companionship. A Cougar is an older woman who seeks out relationships with younger men, mostly of a sexual nature. That certainly is the implication the way I hear it used.

A woman married to a younger man is just married to a younger man. A cougar is making sport out of it.
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  #9  
Old 03-30-2012, 06:56 PM
Jenaroph Jenaroph is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blake View Post

A MILF is a woman of a certain age who is sexually attractive. The term does not imply in any way that she is sexually available. A MILF may be happily married and completely monogamaous, or she may even be celibate. It just refers to a woman that you'd like to fuck, Not one that you necessarily have any hope at all of fucking.
I'd like to point out that the M is a defining and indispensable characteristic of the MILF. M stands for "Mother', so it's not simply that she is a "woman of a certain age," and it cannot refer to a woman who has ALWAYS been celibate.




Sock in the nose to the first person to mention Mary
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Old 03-30-2012, 07:25 PM
jayjay jayjay is offline
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Originally Posted by Jenaroph View Post
I'd like to point out that the M is a defining and indispensable characteristic of the MILF. M stands for "Mother', so it's not simply that she is a "woman of a certain age," and it cannot refer to a woman who has ALWAYS been celibate.




Sock in the nose to the first person to mention Mary
If the BVM is a MILF to someone they've already got enough problems without a sock in the nose...
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  #11  
Old 03-30-2012, 07:56 PM
Batfish Batfish is offline
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MILF, Mother I'd Like to Fuck was originally a term used between teenage boys to indicate attractive women of an older generation. As in, "Have you seen Billy's mom? There's a mother i'd like to fuck."

It denotes no proclivities or desire on the part of the MILF.

Its meaning became broader through usage, especially by men who were old enough that having sex with a "mother" would not even be unusual.
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  #12  
Old 03-30-2012, 08:39 PM
Fubaya Fubaya is offline
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I've heard that "MILF" originally meant the woman was old enough to be your mother. I don't think it requires her to have a kid, just be, say, 18+ years older give or take. A hot 20 year old wouldn't qualify even if she were a mom.

Of course it's just slang anyway so who cares. I never throw a MILF out once they've established themselves. I guess that's just how I was raised.
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  #13  
Old 03-31-2012, 11:21 AM
Irishman Irishman is offline
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The confounding factor is probably porn, where they glom onto labels to turn them into categories, then stretch the usage. In porn websites, they'll accentuate the friskiness of the MILFs they're advertising, which does seem to make the label MILF apply to sexually promiscuous women.

But that's a porn thing, where everything is about accentuating the sex.
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  #14  
Old 03-31-2012, 12:39 PM
wolfman wolfman is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blake View Post

A Cougar is a woman of a certain age who is attracted to younger men. The term says nothing about attractiveness, though it often implies that the woman is attractive. It also says nothing about sexual availability. Though the term has a vague connotation of someone who is happily single, a cougar may be married to a younger man.
I disagree with the sexual availability thing. At least when I first started hearing the term years ago it was not only sexually available, It was usually used for sexually predatory, creepy older chicks who would just stick their hand down some dudes pants and things like that. I know if has soften in general use, but looking for sex is still a key element of Cougars.
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  #15  
Old 03-31-2012, 01:55 PM
BigT BigT is offline
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Originally Posted by wolfman View Post
I disagree with the sexual availability thing. At least when I first started hearing the term years ago it was not only sexually available, It was usually used for sexually predatory, creepy older chicks who would just stick their hand down some dudes pants and things like that. I know if has soften in general use, but looking for sex is still a key element of Cougars.
I concur. Demi Moore, as far as I remember, was not referred to as a cougar, despite marrying the young-enough-to-be-her-son Ashton Kutcher. And I'm pretty sure there are a lot of older women even here on this message board who have talked about being attracted to young stars, without anyone even thinking to call them a cougar.

Being on "the prowl" is an important part of being a cougar. She may not be on it right now, but she has been recently.

Last edited by BigT; 03-31-2012 at 01:56 PM..
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  #16  
Old 04-01-2012, 12:42 PM
handsomeharry handsomeharry is offline
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Originally Posted by BigT View Post
I concur. Demi Moore, as far as I remember, was not referred to as a cougar, despite marrying the young-enough-to-be-her-son Ashton Kutcher.
IIRC, the term wasn't ubiquitous until sometime after their marriage.
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