Summertime...and the sequential threads are sleazy

[Jackmannii]

Another VA benefits question
What are my VA Benefits?

Better yet, where are my VA benefits?

[Jackmannii]

Query re. British royal succession
Is the Pope allowed to retire?

Yes, but in that case Sarah Palin becomes the next Queen of England.

[Ludovic]

What Is Your Taxonomic Classification
Vindicated "Crank" Scientists of the Modern Age

Human subspecies genetically proven!

[Jackmannii]

What feature do you wish your house / apartment had?
Gun experts

Great idea! You hear strange noises downstairs in the middle of the night, so you consult the gun expert who lives in the spare bedroom (or panic room) to decide whether you need the Glock, the sawed-off shotgun or grenade launcher to repel the invaders.

[Der Trihs]

Mormons Vs Main Stream Religions
Death Match

They put up a good fight, but are swarmed under.

[Hypno-Toad]

What would you do if you were going bald?
Death Match

There can be only one!

[CalMeacham]

A legitimate four-fer!



How do you greet and/or part with family, friends, & strangers?

People still here!

Hi Everybody

Hello People

[Der Trihs]

How much is "Any amount less than $100" worth?
Universal Healthcare

It's cheaper than you think.

[Jackmannii]

Snakes - do the make sense as a pet?
Neighbors leaving puppy in yard. What can I do about this?

Hmm.....

[Jackmannii]

Liberals: defend the mandate!
But we already threw off the Admiralty!

And before that, we invented fire. We deserve some freaking time off.

[MEBuckner]

From Comments on Cecil's Columns:

Is there a gender-neutral substitute for "his or her"?
thou, thee, thine

I don't think that really works...

"Each student should write his or her name at the top of his or her paper."

"Each student should write thou, thee, thine name at the top of thou, thee, thine paper."

Nope.

[CalMeacham]

This one's pretty sleazy:


Poll: If you get off with a mermaid, is it bestiality?

Is a ball just a ball?

[Max the Immortal]

Aaaah, aah, aah ah; Eeeee, ee, ee, ee <-- WTF *is* this, on radio??
Celebrity names with many appearances of one letter

[Ludovic]

What is Herpes?
Powder Steel for Knives
Out of round tires
Alligators...?

No I don't think that's it. Keep guessing!

[Ludovic]

In your opinion, why hasn't libertarianism come to pass?
Gout Pain

[Jackmannii]

What bizarre chimaeric organism would you engineer?
Poll: Do you think Syrians/Lebanese look similar to any of these European populations?

Aaagh! It's got the body of a Frenchman and the head of a Syrian! Run!

Nope, not bizarre enough.

[Hypno-Toad]

Once-scary childhood memories of pop culture
Amnesia in fiction

Remember that time I had amnesia? Boy, that was scary. Good thing there was a large prop mallet to bop me on the head with.

[Ludovic]

Absurdist jokes
What would happen if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% the speed of light?
I Got My Google Class Action Suit Settlement Check Today!

Yeah, that's pretty absurd.

[Hypno-Toad]

Weird urges you get (non-sexual)
My fantasy restaurant: Black-Thai Affair

[Der Trihs]

Housewarming gifts
What bizarre chimaeric organism would you engineer?

Guy: "Hey, Carol! Look what I made for you!"

<chitterchittersqueeeeeel!!>

Carol: "Aieeeee!!!" <faints>

[Jackmannii]

Utterly mundane and pointless - I feel like a new name. Suggestions?
Do you know your +4 Zip Code?

Hey, 3097, want in on the office pool?

[Larry Mudd]

Would you consider dating someone with herpes?
Recommend a Good Free Virus Protector

Well, an ex-girlfriend of mine swore that oregano had antiviral properties, and you could probably grow it in the yard - but you really should spring for the Zovirax, you cheap bastard.

[CalMeacham]

The crazy. It hurts.

Meep






I'm seeingh the first on a sign held by a very battered cartoon coyote, and the latter spoken by a purple running bird.

[Jackmannii]

Gynecologists' Smell Test
Excellent Horse-Like Lady (Korean translation needed)

In medical Latin, it's optimum equum-sicut domina ecch.

[Ludovic]

Human Digestive System Vs Cat Brain
Smart enough to know you're dumb.

I guess cats need few more neurons, then.

[Sunspace]

Things that people get Very Wrong
Do you know your +4 Zip Code?

Well, that explains why my mail keeps going to Miami instead of Minneapolis...

[Ludovic]

I Found a Ten Pence Piece In My Change.
You might need that one day.....hoarding.

[Ludovic]

You don't get to vote unless:
My friend believes he is a prophet

[CalMeacham]

Yay! I found a wall!

You might need that one day.....hoarding.



Keeping a wall you found sounds like the very definition of "hoarding"

[cjepson]

Originally Posted by Ludovic

You don't get to vote unless:
My friend believes he is a prophet

An even better one occurred about an hour later:

Would you be offended if a friend called "authorities" on you for illogical beliefs?
My friend believes he is a prophet

[kmshrader]

What feature do you wish your house / apartment had?
magical mushrooms


Now that's a feature.

[Jackmannii]

SD Doctors and/or Pharmasists, why is this a bad idea?
Speak to me of perimenopause

You're just delaying the inevitable - why not jump right into full-fledged menopause?*

*Look for the AARP membership application in the mail.

People talking to themselves. What's going on?
Hypnosis

[Ludovic]

People talking to themselves. What's going on?
Hypnosis

[Ludovic]

You don't get to vote unless:
I am fed up with my sex drive

[Jackmannii]

Predict what my doctor will tell me (TMI)
Masturbation etiquette

"Well doc, I was on the N train during rush hour, and..." "Nooooo!!!!!"

[Ludovic]

You don't get to vote unless:
You get one of a choice of superpowers

[MEBuckner]

Hypothetical: Obama not only wins, but gains supermajority
How Exactly does one make money online?

E-mail spam. "How to avoid the coming Socialist New World Order Sharia Death Panels by buying gold and stocking up on guns and ammo!!! Order your copy today!!!!"

[Der Trihs]

You get one of a choice of superpowers
Muscular Women

"Summon Amazon Legion!" <poof>

[Jackmannii]

modern day worship of greek gods
What's the nerdiest thing about you?

Worshipping Proteus (a.k.a. "The Old Man Of The Sea").

[CalMeacham]

You get one of a choice of superpowers

Speak to me of perimenopause

[CalMeacham]

Ladies, do you ever go commando while exercising?

Poll: Muscular Women

[Jackmannii]

Things that people get Very Wrong
I think my cat is pregnant...

Careful - you don't want to schedule the kitty shower and then find out you've just got a fat cat.

[DCnDC]

It's time to officially Pit Joe Paterno and the Penn State football program

The case of the disappearing tomato

...too soon?

[Hypno-Toad]

25 Terrific Years Together!
I am fed up with my sex drive

She's probably getting pretty fed up with your sex drive too.

[Johnny L.A.]

Call in the next 10 minutes and you get...
Adopted again (kitties)?

[Der Trihs]

Call in the next 10 minutes and you get...
Things that people get Very Wrong

That would be...a lot of stuff. Where would I put it all?


Hey. 60 hour no sleep challenge.
It's Prehistoric Creature Day again!

Well, after 60 hours I'm sure I'd feel pretty prehistoric.


Trans-Atlantic flight with a 15 month old
Help me stay awake

Oh, I don't think that'll be a problem for you or anyone else on the flight.

[Jackmannii]

Call in the next 10 minutes and you get...
Another umkay sighting

Send in $19.95 and you get two umkay sightings! Plus an oven mitt.

[Martian Bigfoot]

Another umkay sighting
Found a strange thing in my bathroom (less than SFW)

[Johnny L.A.]

Things that people get Very Wrong
Rolls-Royce turbofan -- made of Lego

[Jackmannii]

Impressionable boys and the "facts of life"
Scratching balls results in erections??