The comment war between the person mentioned in the article and his haters is also very amusing. I stand on the side of unadorned poles.
Where I work, holiday decorations were forbidden. Then starting one year, they were not only permitted but we were encouraged to outdo every other department to vie for first place. We won every year that we participated. (We stopped because the person who did 95% of the work got tired of it.)
One year our theme was all of the December holidays. Hell yeah we had a Festivus pole! (It was really just a cardboard tube covered in foil.)
Well, it IS the time for the Airing of Grievances.
The fun part is when the mayor comes out for the airing of grievances and you get to wrestle him to the ground.
What’s weird is I see Fesivus poles infront of almost all government buildings.
And to make things worse, they put flags at the top of them.
Ever hear of separation of church and state, people?
Where the hell is the ACLU?
That’s not a real Festivus pole. It’s too decorated. It needs to be plain.
Festivus is getting way too commercial.
If this reminds people to donate to the Human Fund, can it be a bad thing?
I got a lot of problems with you people!
I didn’t know that PBR had a high strength-to-weight ratio.
Oh dear, rabid atheists? What’s next, rabid anti-dentites?
Well that is an assumption on my part. With a name like Peggy and all. But still, she should be prepared for grievances and feats of strength.
She shouldn’t have run for the job if she can’t fulfill all the responsibilities.
But in all seriousness, by tradition it would be her daughter that gets first crack.
I could never figure why Mr. Costanza didn’t air his grievances at Thanksgiving, like a normal person.
“As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way!”
Many Festivuses ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. As I drove to the store, I saw a highly-distracting Festivus pole- but so did another man and he drove right into me. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.
The pole was destroyed, and out of that a new holiday was born…eh, who’m I kidding; I’m too lazy to invent a holiday, so let’s just call it Apathetikkah and do nothing but drink.
You’re right. It takes all the meaning out of the holiday.
And I hate people who leave their Festivus Pole up until the equinox.
Would Apathetikkah last for 8 nights? If so, I’m in.
Who cares?
Well, not that I really care, but if I had to say, Apathetikkah only lasts a day. I don’t have the will to do anything for 8 nights.
And so I now declare with half-assed indifference: December the 22nd may or may not now and forever be marked as a day of staying home and drinking, with other people or alone-- I don’t really care. In fact, what the hell do I care if you drink or not. Or even stay home for that matter.
“Apathetikkah: Meh.”
[Takes a drink]
I can’t bring myself to feel any strong emotion about this holiday. If I get the day off I’ll probably just spend the day drinking beer and playing video games.