I spent considerable time and effort writing my resume, to say nothing of the 25+ years invested in my career. The least you could do is take a half a minute to read it and figure out I’m not the least bit interested in your goddamn insurance sales position. I even took the time to narrow the scope of my search to my own profession and field of expertise. Which has nothing what-so-ever to do with whatever it is you fucking cheerie morons do for a goddamn living when you’re not wasting my time. Do not try to explain to me that you have recruited nurses and constructions workers and physics professors to sell whatever it is you’re selling. I don’t give a flying fuck. I didn’t call you because I’m not fucking interested. So fuck your happy little sales pitch. Fuck your attempts to explain why you are cold calling me. Fuck your company. Fuck your bonus structure. Fuck your line of business. And most especially… FUCK YOU.
Right though? It’s obviously either a scam (invest money, it will pay off scam) or a real low comission job. Meanwhile that jerk is tying up the phone while a real job offer could be calling.
If I ever have to get a job in sales I’ll kill myself in the messiest way possible. People will be talking about it years after…“Guess what I found behind the Buffet the other day. A piece of Anthony! Still!”
When I lost my job a couple years back I was going to school full time for my master’s and had applied for several local positions. I had to default on some debt because I didn’t have a job. Debt collectors called me non-stop despite explaining it to them. I couldn’t have my phone on in class because the non stop debt collection calls, so I couldn’t answer any prospective job offers. Ugh.
When I was looking for a job I used to get the weirdest calls from recruiters.
“Hi, I saw your resume online, and I think I have a position for you.”
“Yay!”
“Do you have any experience with (skill that is not on my resume)?”
“Um, no.”
“How about (other skill that is not on my resume)?”
“No…”
“Huh, well I don’t think you’ll be a good fit for this position.”
/attempts to strangle retard over phone line
“Hi, I saw your resume online, and I have a position that I think you can fill.”
“Yay!”
“It’s a 3 month contract with no chance of permanent hire in a city 700 miles from where you live now, they want you to start in a week, and you’ll have to learn (programming language) before then. Can I count on you?”
“…”
I learned to dread the phrase 'I saw your resume online". My brain started automatically translating it as ‘I wrote down your name and phone number and never bothered to look at anything else on it’.
I’m starting to believe you. I’ve been getting weekly calls from some guy with a nearly undecipherable accent.
He keeps calling to tell me he has a job I may be interested in, but each time it’s in a different city that’s further and further away.
The last time he called I told him to please not call me unless the job is within a certain mile radius of my city. He’s wasting my time and his with these jobs that are two and three hours away.
Well you know that’s pretty much how it works. Debt collectors get paid when they get you to send payment. I don’t think one’s ever been paid because they heard a good excuse.
Wait a minute, the OP is this pissed off because some douchebag recruiter called him? How long does it take to say “No” or “Wow, dude, you must be fucking desperate” or just laugh hysterically and hang up?
That kind of one-at-a-time bullshit isn’t even close to world class time wasting. I have gone on interviews where it became apparent that the recruiter had lied about my qualifications to the prospective employer. Awkward, to say the least. Even better, sometimes the dipshits play the opposite angle and lie about the salary range. Because maybe I’ll fall in love with the secretary whose old enough to be my grandma and take a pay cut just to be near her.
How about the dumbfucks who insist that you go to lunch with people before you can go for the real interview. What the fuck do they need to see over a meal that wouldn’t be apparent at the interview? Does the candidate smell bad? Make inappropriate jokes about the boss’s religion? Dress like a fucking slob? This shit should be apparent without wasting twice as much time by consuming food together.
What about the shitstains who insist that you fly out the night before and stay overnight. Thanks for fucking up two of my workdays in a pathetic bid to increase my investment in your shitty position.
Recruiters are salesmen. You can be reasonably sure that they are lying every fucking time they open their breathing/eating hole.
On the other side of the table, I’ve had the same recruiter send me the same exact resume I’ve already rejected two or three more times. The second time I was clear that I had already received and rejected it, the third time it was obvious that had been completely ignored - practically the same “check this guy out!” enthusiastic email.
I felt bad for the candidate, who probably had no idea that after his recruiter wasted my time like that I wouldn’t piss on him if he were on fire.
