Lou Gehrig's Disease? Ka-CHING!

[Miller]

Great, now they're doing it to Lou Gehrig. Maybe you saw that commercial for Some Damn Internet company (SDI inc, I suppose) which used Dr. King's "I have a dream" speech, digitally removing all the other people from the film. One of the most inspirational visions of justice and equality, turned into a spiel for "network solutions" or cell phones, or whatever the fuck these people do, aside from desecrating national icons. I thought this was about as low as advertising can get. Silly, silly me. I was wrong. Now they're doing the same thing with Lou Gehrig's "Today, I am the luckist man in the world" speech. You know, the one he gave when his HIDEOUS DEGENERATIVE DISEASE forced him to give up the game he loved? How fuckin' low is this? How completely amoral do you have to be to watch this man saying goodbye to the most important thing in his life and think, "Hey, that'd be a GREAT commercial!" And what really gets me, what really makes this whole thing completely unbearable, is that I don't know what these pork-farts are trying to sell. "Before you inspire, you have to connect." What the hell does that mean? What am I supposed to buy, here? What goddamn product should I avoid purchasing so that these mercenary bastards go tits up?

Somebody has got to kill these fuckers, before they go after Ghandi, or JFK.

[matt_mcl]

Too late. Apple had Gandhi (and Einstein, and Picasso, and Mother Teresa, and John Lennon) hawking computers for them under the slogan Think Different like two years ago.

[Protesilaus]

Originally posted by Nimune
What goddamn product should I avoid purchasing so that these mercenary bastards go tits up?

Hmm, a seemingly internet-related company with nebulous, unclear ads that don't reveal a damn thing about what the company actually does or what its purpose is? I don't think they have products.

Of course, the truly disturbing thing is that, right now, there's probably someone out there coming up with something that's even worse and more tasteless than this.

[Bill H.]

Well, they're Alcatel, and they bought my last company for a handsome price, so I can't speak too ill of them. They make networking stuff. They're in discussions now to buy Lucent. I hate the commercials too.

Man those Apple ads pissed me off. Feynman was the worst.

It's sad to think that when you're dead your face is just a comodity.

[Miller]

Alcatel, huh? Well, I can safely say that from now on, when I think of Alcatel, I'll think of amyotropic lateral sclerosis.

[Milossarian]

What I like is their astonishing arrogance. I read an article somewhere where they responded to the backlash, and their attitude was (paraphrasing), "We are not denegrating these great memories or icons, we are celebrating them and honoring them. We are doing this tastefully."

Like they should be congratulated for not morphing an Alcatel T-shirt onto King or Gehrig. The arrogance occurs before the first frame of the commercial is shot, however you do it, you smug fuckheads. For thinking you and your company are even in the same Universe of relevance to these historic people, events and moments.

And while we're ranting about these computer companies that no one is sure what they do, and their commercials indicate they like it that way -- Can I just say that those "You can do a lot with a Black Rocket" commercials are the stupidest fucking things I've ever seen?

I like how they have that phrase copyrighted. You know, to stop everyone else from using such an ingenius slogan.

[pesch]

While you're slapping people around, give a hand to the King family, who got a cut of the action for letting them dick around with the speech. They hold the copyright and agreed to this.

Most of the time, when you hear your favorite music being used to sell shoes, you can slap the record companies. Most of the time, they own the copyright and most of the time, the band members don't even get a cut of the action. (The exception, I think, was "Revolution." Michael Jackson sold the Beatles out on that one.)

And for those who wonder why this would inspire such a rant, think on this . . . when I hear "Revolution" now, I don't think of the Beatles. I think of Nike. Just like the bastards intended.

And when I hear the King speech now, I'm going to think of this friggin' networking company and not the message of peace and hope. Thanks to the King family.

". . . I have a scheme! . . . "

[SPOOFE]

"Lou Gehrig... dies of Lou Gehrig's Disease. Who didn't see that one coming, huh?"
-Dennis Leary

[Drastic]

I have a vision of sufficient savvy people or person, with sufficient time and software on their hands, to get fed up enough with this fucking campaign to put together their own Alcatel commercial and release it on the net.

It will use stock footage of one of the various speeches where Hitler is screeching and nigh-hopping behind his podium like the psychotic little monkey he was, only of course the crowds of people who thought jackboots and gas chambers were a really groovy idea will be digitally removed. Cut to standard "To inspire, you must first connect." Cut back to crowd added back in screaming siegheils and such at Der Fuhrerminke. "Alcatel, blah blah."

I'm sure they'd be very uncomfortable with that, but fuck em. Rape the memory of justly honored famous historical figures, and get raped in return by justly loathed infamous ones. Seems fair to me.

[minty green]

pesch has it exactly right. Although Alcatel is certainly to blame for these atrocities, I'm equally pissed off at the families who so blithely sold Alcatel the right to use those words and images. The King family's behavior in this regard is beneath contempt.

[Miss Creant]

(sigh of relief)
I thought the OP was somehow going to bash ALS. My grandfather had it, and I probably do too.

[friedo]

Originally posted by matt_mcl
Too late. Apple had Gandhi (and Einstein, and Picasso, and Mother Teresa, and John Lennon) hawking computers for them under the slogan Think Different like two years ago.

I think there is a big difference between associating "thinking different" with pictures of revolutionary people and actually digitally modifying records of history because it makes a neato slogan. These two compaigns aren't in anywhere near the same league of distastefulness.

[Ceejaytee]

Speaking of the unspeakable use of The Beatles' Revolution to sell sneakers manufactured by underpaid laborers, I heard a radio commercial destroying Marvin Gaye's moving anti-war song "What's Goin' On." While some untalented hack (well, compared to Marvin) sang the chorus, I got to hear about the wonderful electronics that Radio Shack has to offer. Radio Shack! Using a song about men dying in Vietnam, mothers losing sons, protestors trying to stop the war--to sell electronics!

I guess Marvin Gaye's estate needed some money. Right. Poor Marvin must be spinning in his grave.

[Gundy]

This isn't in the same poor-taste league as the previously mentioned commercials, but I love that some bank or another is using Iggy Pop's "Lust for Life", a song about heroin addiction (but what good song isn't?), to advertise themselves. Ha and ha.

[Tranquilis]

Originally posted by Drastic
...Cut back to crowd added back in screaming siegheils and such at Der Fuhrerminke. "Alcatel, blah blah."... ...Seems fair to me.

That's a sweet image.

I've visions of brown-shirted thugs marching through the streets chanting "Alca - Tel! Alca - Tel..!" We can screen the faces of the historic figures they've desecrated onto the street, underneath their jackbooted feet, and slap their logo dead-center on every swastika. Maybe we can morph Hitler's face to resemble Alcatel's CEO, complete with the little mustache?

That should fall under the free-speach protections of the Constitution, as ligitimate, if over-the-top, protest. Alcatel will fight it, but I'll bet the ACLU would love defending it.

[Cervaise]

Drastic, that is motherfucking hilarious and brilliant, and I salute you so emphatically I break my hand on my forehead.

[pepperlandgirl]

And for those who wonder why this would inspire such a rant, think on this . . . when I hear "Revolution" now, I don't
think of the Beatles. I think of Nike. Just like the bastards intended.

When I hear "Voodoo Chile" I don't think of Stevie Ray Vaughn, I think of Nissan. Which really, really pisses me off.

[sturmhauke]

Hey I don't know what's wrong with you people. Crass commercialism is the way of the world. In fact, tomorrow I am going to lease out advertising space on my car to the highest bidder. J won't appreciate it at first, because, well, it's her car, but I'll just convince her that we must all prostitute ourselves to capitalism. We'll both soon be thinking joy joy thoughts forever.

[Odesio]

Originally posted by Nimune
How completely amoral do you have to be to watch this man saying goodbye to the most important thing in his life and think, "Hey, that'd be a GREAT commercial!" And what really gets me, what really makes this whole thing completely unbearable, is that I don't know what these pork-farts are trying to sell.

I also object to digital manipulation to get stars to hawk beer and home appliances. I think it is in poor taste to use someone's image like that.

Marc

[waterj2]

Wow. I suppose I'm the only one who really doesn't at all mind those commercials.

[Rasa]

I drive by Apple's Cupertino HQ daily on my way to work (I live in San Jose and work in Mountain View), and they have these HUGE black and white Think Different banners on the main building. They rotate the banners every couple months... it was a little girl for a while, but since March (I assume for Black History Month) it's been Dr. King.

[Milossarian]

PLG said:

When I hear "Voodoo Chile" I don't think of Stevie Ray Vaughn, I think of Nissan. Which really, really pisses me off.

I don't have the heart to tell her she's supposed to think of Jimi Hendrix. Because she's young. And cute.

[amarinth]

Originally posted by waterj2
Wow. I suppose I'm the only one who really doesn't at all mind those commercials.

Nope. I like the commercials. I think they make a good point... and I don't think it's tasteless use, I think it's a good one.

[Odesio]

Originally posted by waterj2
Wow. I suppose I'm the only one who really doesn't at all mind those commercials.

I can't say they get my panties in a bunch nor will they prevent me from buying their product. I just find their ads to be in poor taste.

Now one ad that did piss me off was for diamonds. It was in the paper and the caption was something like "If you don't buy it for her then her next husband will." That would make be avoid shopping at that particular company.

Marc

[Shirley Ujest]

Hat's off to Drastic for boldly and creatively putting a visual image of total hypocrisy for us to look at.

[Shirley Ujest]

What to look for in advertising trends:

Anne Frank hawking large ovens.

Steven Hawking tapping dancing with a vaccuum cleaner.

Groucho Marx selling guns. ( I once shot an elephant in my pajama's....)

Ghandi selling Martha Stewart bed sheets

Yul Brenner: The New and Tougher Mr. Clean

Raul Julia: selling the new 2002 Chyrsler Cordoba's.

Gilda Radner: Hair frizz tamer stuff

Winston Churchill: Starch

Bobby Kennedy: toothpaste

John Kennedy Jr - Hair gel

Princess Diana: Laundry Detergent and Cruise Lines.

Abe Lincoln: Preperation H

James Cagney: Grapefruit Juice (Hi Eve!)

Mae West: Underwear line for Kmart

Gene Kelly: Dancing under sprinkler systems

Ginger Rogers: Birkenstocks

Humphrey Bogart: Mutual funds.

George Raft: Off Track Betting

Chico Marx: Off Track Betting

Ed Sullivan: Life Insurance

Jimmy Stewart: Chevy's

Bob Hope: Oh wait, he's not dead yet.

Franklin Roosevelt: Visit Georgia Today ads.

Mamie Eisenhower, Jackie Kennedy, Elenor Roosevelt: Vagisil

Betty Ford: Coors


Who'd I miss?

[Papermache Prince]

I'm assuming most of you are aware that selling advertising on your car is already a business.

http://www.autowraps.com/driver_about_us.html

"Welcome to Autowraps.com the first marketplace to list your vehicle as a moving billboard. . . .
Autowraps brings together people who want to earn extra money while driving and in traffic and companies who want a unique medium to promote their brand or product."