Things you thought were April Fools jokes that weren't

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

The world being what it is today, it’s getting harder to determine what’s real and what’s a parody. The Onion has spawned dozens of imitators worldwide, but politicians, media talking heads and Floridians* are striving hard to making reality as ridiculous as parody.

And sometimes it doesn’t even take something that ridiculous to make you say “Waaaaaaait a minute - that’s gotta be fake” - it may just be something outside your area of familiarity. When I first moved to the UK I was reading a newspaper on 1 April looking for spoof articles when I spotted one about how the TV Licensing people could park a van outside your house and know exactly what channel you were watching. “That has to be a joke”, I thought. Nope - they can do that.

So in the spirit of the season, what have you been convinced was an April Fool’s Day gag that turned out to be real?

  • sorry, Florida.
2

Idle Thoughts really is a woman.

Regards,
Shodan

3

The announcement by the CEO of Starbucks concerning reactions to their support of LGBT rights:

4

Google announcing free email with 1 GB of storage space (this was in 2004, mind you…when 1 GB was an unheard of amount of space)

5

I just read a post from one of the Volvo Ocean Race teams about their boat getting attacked by a giant squid. I’m pretty sure it’s fake, but there are plenty of stories of this happening that I’m still not 100% certain. There’s even a video of a Greenpeace submarine getting into it with one.

6

For reals? I got the PM and Idle Thoughts said that he or she always liked most of my posts and my BS meter just went crazy. Nobody likes most of my posts.

7

Will Ferrell and Kristen Wiig making a Lifetime movie about a couple whose plans to adopt a child go horribly wrong.

Or maybe it’s the perfect April Fool’s prank because that’s their story and they’re sticking to it.

8

The Orange County California Sodomy Suppression Bill sadly is not pretend. :frowning: I realize it isn’t an April 1st story but I’ve been busy, and just saw it then. http://www.latimes.com/local/politics/la-me-anti-gay-measure-20150324-story.html

9

April 1st, 2015, 00:06 am. I get a phone call from our operations/rostering people.

Ops person: “How quickly can you get to work?”
Me (groggy, sleepy): “mmm, 'bout an hour…”
OP: “Ok, do it.”
Me: “Alright … what am I doing?”
OP: “Don’t know yet, probably Adelaide, Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane.”
Me: “Ok, bye”

I have a quick shower, get dressed, and before I get in the car I check my online roster. There is nothing on it, it still says I’m on reserve.

I drive to work, a bit annoyed, my Mum is here for a few days and I’d been planning on taking her wine tasting. If I have to fly through to Brisbane I’m not going to be back in till midday and then I’m going to want to sleep. Ops person didn’t mention getting home to Adelaide either, maybe I’ll have to stay the day in Brisbane, maybe I should have packed an overnight bag? Oh well, I’ve got my phone and credit cards, I can buy some toiletries and clean undies if I need to.

I get to work and before getting out of the car I check my online roster again from my phone. Hmmm, this looks a bit suspicious. My duty says Adelaide to Melbourne, than it says I’m flying home as a passenger with Qantas and there is a note next to the duty that says “FALSE”. I’m starting to think this is a bad joke. I check again and there is a roster change, the change is the same duty as before but instead of saying “FALSE” it says “FAKE”. They can’t possibly pull this kind of stunt can they? I also note that I’m flying with a new captain which means, for the first time in nearly three years I’ll be flying as the first officer. New captains are not permitted to operate as a first officer while more seasoned captains are. Jesus! Can I remember what to do?

I walk into the crew room and my captain is in there. He looks at me and says he doesn’t think we are going anywhere. I’m still not really awake and wonder if he’s referring to it all being an April Fool’s joke but apparently operations are still saying they don’t know exactly what’s happening.

I sit down, sign on, have a look at the weather and try to get interested. By this stage I’m about 70% sure that it is a big leg pulling exercise.

Eventually I call ops to get the latest.

Me: “This isn’t some kind of elaborate April Fools prank is it?”
Ops (laughing): “I wish it was … no, we want you to fly Adelaide, Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane then back to Adelaide”
Me (sigh): “Ok”

I’d really been hoping it was a prank and I could go home and back to bed, but no, it wasn’t. Apparently the “FALSE” and “FAKE” notes were just place holders in lieu of the, then unknown, complete duty.

10

I remember thinking that was an April Fool too.

There was one this year here in Ireland. Supposedly Center Parcs, a UK based adventure holiday resort operator, were going to spend €100 million building a new resort in Ireland, in county Longford. This was announced on April 1st.

This was extremely implausible, largely because it was going to be based in Longford. If you adore placid, tranquil rural idylls, where nothing much ever happens and there’s nothing at all to do, then Longford is your perfect holiday destination. It’s one of the smallest Irish counties, has no industry beyond agriculture, and cows in the county outnumber people by 3 to 1. Longford is so undistinguished, there’s a running joke in urban Ireland that Longford is actually an urban myth, and doesn’t in fact exist.

It turns out the reports are true, though. Nice that someone finally found a use for the place.

11

I hadn’t realised that County Longford was a “joke place” in the way described – have, though, heard references in a similar vein, to neighbouring County Leitrim.

One of the joys of “joke places” is that pretty well any reference to them in a non-tragic context is ipso facto funny, because it’s about that place. Getting all humourless – the idea of a Longford Center Parcs resort is not particularly crazy, what with a particular attribute of Center Parc establishments being that they are essentially self-contained, with all features and attractions on-site: to all intents and purposes, a Center Parcs resort can be almost anywhere. There’s a popular one of same in England, in Sherwood Forest – a place which has hugely declined and dwindled since the days of Robin Hood and the Sheriff. Sherwood is now a quite tiny wooded area amidst extensive unattractive, largely built-up, industrial or post-industrial terrain.

12

The murder of Marvin Gaye. How could you own father shoot you to death the day before your birthday?

13

My sister chose this April 1 to tell everyone in the family out of the blue that she had bought a new house and was already in the process of moving in.

14

I heard a news story this week that our state (Kansas) had passed a law allowing concealed carry without a permit or training. Sadly, it is not a joke.