My husband is watching Encore Western. He does this a lot. Right now he’s watching Sierra Baron and I overheard this gem:
Guy One: He was shot and killed.
Guy Two: But how?
Guy One: I do not know.
I dare anyone to come up with something more ridiculous said seriously in a movie or TV show.
From the movie COG (I think).
The scenario is there a super secret underground base in the US where all the super secret science is done.
There have been a series of suspicious deaths there. Which suggests an inside job, probably by a comie pinko.
An outside expert has been brought in.
At one point they realize the comies now know the location of the base and may be able to nuke it without any warning.
Then the following dialog takes place (paraphrased)
Outside expert: Which levels would not be able to survive a nuclear strike?
Local male scientist: Levels 5 and above.
Outside expert: Okay, immediately evacuate levels 5 and above.
Local female scientist: But level 4 is the cafeteria and they are having lunch right now.
:smack:
Well, bullfish, we can’t have evacuations on an empty stomach!
Honestly I have blocked out the exact lines ( other than a screamed NOOOOOOOO!!! - maybe that is all that is needed ), but just based on memories of horror it would had to have been something from Dungeons and Dragons ( the movie ). A film that can only thank the mysteriously perplexing Highlander 2 for not sitting at the all time bottom of the heap.
OP quote sounds like Teal’c and O’Neil
But these guys were exploring unknown worlds. It is possible to come across a body riddled with holes and not know how it happened. Run across someone shot to death in the Sierra Madres in the 1800’s, well, that’s a whole nother story.
From Star Trek Voyager:
B’Elanna Torres: Get the cheese to sickbay. The Doctor should look at it as soon as possible.
So infamous a dialog that critics point at it as the whole series in a nutshell.
Form the disaster movie (on more ways than one) 2012
The Neutrinos coming from the sun have Mutated!
I’ll let Dara O’Briain explain why it is so ridiculous:
He said, “The neutrinos have mutated”. Now, these are fundamental particles. It’s like going, “The electrons are angry”. It’s as ridiculous as saying, “The light from the sun…sniff, it’s gone off”. (NSFW language in the link)
—Dara O’Briain
Reminds me of one of the gems from Plan Nine From Outer Space:
Perhaps not the worst dialog ever, but certainly the one that makes me cringe the most.
“Some sort of Star Trek"
(at around 1:20)
Quite a bit of dialog from Flesh Gordon…dumb but brilliant.
This is precisely the example I opened this thread to cite.
Looking at the blog and the summaries of Voyager’s final-season episodes, I realize how many of them I’ve either never seen, or seen and repressed the memories thereof.
What was that show called? The one with Denethor as Pacey’s dad, investigatin’ stuff? Oh yeah, Fringe.
Pacey: …blah blah blah…
Denethor: “The events appear to be scientific in nature.”
Ridicule ensued.
“It’s like blue balls in your heart.”
From season two of True Detective.
I’m sure it wasn’t ridiculous in proper context but I still remember getting the giggles as a young adult after overhearing a classic western playing in the next room:
“Strap this on and be a man.”
Everything from The Room. Example:
Mark: How was work today?
Johnny: Oh, pretty good. We got a new client and the bank will make a lot of money.
Mark: What client?
Johnny: I cannot tell you; it’s confidential.
Mark: Aw, come on. Why not?
Johnny: No, I can’t. Anyway, how is your sex life?
Plan 9 was mentioned, so the next one that comes to mind is some show on MTV that I watched with a relative. The scene was two models talking about recent events in their lives.
Model 1: You just got back from Italy? How was it?
Model 2: Great! But let’s talk about what’s going on around here instead.
Model 1: Blah blah blah.
Italy didn’t come up again. It seemed like such lazy writing, explaining why Model 1 wasn’t on camera for a while, and then right back to exposition. Plus who doesn’t like talking about their trip to another country? I started poking fun at the show but I was annoying the other people in the room so I shut up.
I’m having a hard time finding a copy of the actual shooting script used for Invaders from Mars – the original 1953 version – but I has some amazingly bad dialogue in it.
You may have heard that this is a classic, a wonderful kid’s nightmare made by the designed-turned-director William Cameron Menzies. But, I assure you, the dialogue stinks.
I watched this once in an art cinema – the kind where people get dressed up to attend, and the floors aren’t sticky with half-dried soda and jujubes, because they don’t sell refreshments there. Their patrons are there to see film as an ART form. These are people deeply committed to appreciating film. And by the time the film got to the point where the astronomer is speculating about the Martian mew-TANTS (that’s how he pronounced “mutants”) the well-dressed audience was shouting abusive comments at the screen.
Here’s how one review site addresses this scene:
http://www.randybyers.net/?p=775
I will give the film one thing. After the Good Guys set the timer for the bomb to go off in the Martian bunker, there seems to be an intolerably long time of running through tunnels and of visual flashbacks before the bomb goes off. But I timed it – the sequence took exactly the length of time that the timer was set for. It’s the only case I know of where that’s true – usually they take dramatic liberties with such timing, and cut it short.
Still doesn’t help the dialogue.
There are so many dumb lines in the later Star Trek series, you could publish an entire compendium of them:
“Troi! You’re my friend, and you tricked me!”
“Ahhh, prune juice! The drink of a warrior!”
“It’s my science project for school, mom.”
These are the first three that come to mind.
The Davinci Code - the entire god damn book.
Yeah, it’s a far cry from the much lauded, well respected, dearly beloved, highly praised original “Star Trek” series that featured such crisp, intellectual dialogue as:
