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  #101  
Old 04-18-2017, 06:33 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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I'm here. I can't post a lot while I'm working.
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  #102  
Old 04-18-2017, 06:35 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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Never mind. Stupid Tapatalk.

Last edited by davidm; 04-18-2017 at 06:36 PM.
  #103  
Old 04-18-2017, 07:56 PM
TokyoBayer TokyoBayer is offline
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Never mind. Stupid Tapatalk.
That's it! The code words! OMG! They are harvesting his organs.
  #104  
Old 04-18-2017, 08:08 PM
AngelSoft AngelSoft is offline
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That's it! The code words! OMG! They are harvesting his organs.
I call dibs on his por.......dvd collection.
  #105  
Old 04-18-2017, 08:48 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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Originally Posted by davidm View Post
Never mind. Stupid Tapatalk.
That's it! The code words! OMG! They are harvesting his organs.
No. It was a dup post. Probably caused by Tapatalk.
Everything went fine. I think I impressed my boss on the first day with my Linux skills.
  #106  
Old 04-18-2017, 08:48 PM
Spiderman Spiderman is offline
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That's it! The code words! OMG! They are harvesting his organs.
Oh, stop being such a worrywort.
Just relax & have some pie.
  #107  
Old 04-18-2017, 10:33 PM
TokyoBayer TokyoBayer is offline
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Oh, stop being such a worrywort.

Just relax & have some pie.
Meatloaf, again?
  #108  
Old 04-18-2017, 11:00 PM
Spiderman Spiderman is offline
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Meatloaf, again?
Pie & Meatloaf?

Two Out of Three Ain't Bad.
  #109  
Old 04-18-2017, 11:24 PM
digs digs is offline
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No. It was a dup post. Probably caused by Tapatalk.
Everything went fine. I think I impressed my boss on the first day with my Linux skills.
Sigh... I guess everyone here is too busy being clever to say "Congrats! Glad your first day went well!"
  #110  
Old 04-18-2017, 11:27 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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Still alive!

I mean, yay! Congrats on a good first day!
  #111  
Old 04-19-2017, 06:44 AM
davidm davidm is offline
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It's my own fault for posting that silly "all is well" post. Of course people are going to respond with jokes.

Thanks for the congrats!
  #112  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:06 AM
digs digs is offline
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Well, we're happy for you... and relieved.

Not that we weren't hoping for an unfolding drama of "Missing Crazy Coworker!" proportions, complete with suspicious job duties, sinister HR drones, a shady CEO planning world domination, and ends with you stowing away on the undercarriage of a Tesla taking your laptop to Canada, where you call in the Mounties to thwart the Macs-for-Maple Syrup plot...
  #113  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:17 AM
davidm davidm is offline
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And... this morning I was asked if I'd like to pray with the rest of the employees...
  #114  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:22 AM
iiandyiiii iiandyiiii is offline
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And... this morning I was asked if I'd like to pray with the rest of the employees...
What did you do?

Last edited by iiandyiiii; 04-19-2017 at 08:22 AM.
  #115  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:26 AM
davidm davidm is offline
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He said that there was no pressure and it was okay either way. I politely said that it was something I do in private. He seemed fine with it. A little later they were standing in the open area outside the offices, in a circle, holding hands and praying.
  #116  
Old 04-19-2017, 10:38 AM
kayaker kayaker is offline
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A little later they were standing in the open area outside the offices, in a circle, holding hands and praying.
Did the demon appear?
  #117  
Old 04-19-2017, 10:47 AM
Jackmannii Jackmannii is offline
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And... this morning I was asked if I'd like to pray with the rest of the employees...
...in a bathtub full of ice cubes?
  #118  
Old 04-19-2017, 10:51 AM
voltaire voltaire is offline
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Heh, all this thread needs is a script writer to adapt it into a horror movie.
  #119  
Old 04-19-2017, 10:57 AM
davidm davidm is offline
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Seriously, it's not at all sinister. They're nice people, although the religiosity in the office is a bit innapropriate.
  #120  
Old 04-19-2017, 11:05 AM
voltaire voltaire is offline
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Did they tell you to say that?

  #121  
Old 04-19-2017, 11:05 AM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is offline
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Seriously, it's not at all sinister. They're nice people, although the religiosity in the office is a bit innapropriate.
Is this business directly tied to a religious institute of some sort?
How many others decline to participate in the group prayer?

Last edited by Czarcasm; 04-19-2017 at 11:06 AM.
  #122  
Old 04-19-2017, 11:07 AM
Nawth Chucka Nawth Chucka is offline
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Haven't seen this thread since yesterday, so I'm pleased for your not getting hurt in any way whatsoever on your first day! Congrats on putting your Linux skills to good use already and it sounds like you can find a happy medium in staying out of the religiousy people's way so long as they respect your own.
When I was at a paper mill in Georgia the religiosity was unavoidable - never mind that it was an international company, there was a religious majority and they would not be swayed from frequent group grace being said and occasional praying over of concerns and happy tidings, right there in the offices and on company time. I kept my head down and mouth shut when I couldn't avoid being present.

Last edited by Nawth Chucka; 04-19-2017 at 11:08 AM.
  #123  
Old 04-19-2017, 12:52 PM
Chisquirrel Chisquirrel is offline
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Is this business directly tied to a religious institute of some sort?
How many others decline to participate in the group prayer?
You missed the important question:

Do they provide Kool-Aid?
  #124  
Old 04-19-2017, 01:22 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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Is this business directly tied to a religious institute of some sort?
How many others decline to participate in the group prayer?
I'm not aware of any ties.

I don't know how many others.
  #125  
Old 04-19-2017, 02:11 PM
gigi gigi is offline
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No. It was a dup post. Probably caused by Tapatalk.
Everything went fine. I think I impressed my boss on the first day with my Linux skills.
You misspelled "mad Linux skillz".

Continued good luck!
  #126  
Old 04-19-2017, 03:09 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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Look, I have to ask, is this a joke? A little revenge for all of the "help" we've given you?
  #127  
Old 04-19-2017, 03:45 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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Nope. No joke.
  #128  
Old 04-19-2017, 03:50 PM
Musicat Musicat is offline
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So...you have a paycheck yet? And did it bounce? Crucify itself?
  #129  
Old 04-19-2017, 07:13 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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No one pays you after two days.
  #130  
Old 04-19-2017, 07:20 PM
kayaker kayaker is offline
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No one pays you after two days.
  1. Kids who cut your grass
  2. Prostitutes
  3. Wedding bands
  4. Window washers
  5. Carpet installers

to name but a few.
  #131  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:14 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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Look, I have to ask, is this a joke? A little revenge for all of the "help" we've given you?
OK. So, if they start talking about the spaceship that is following behind the comet/asteroid/moon or whatever, you'll want to step out at lunch and not come back.
  #132  
Old 04-19-2017, 08:20 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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  1. Kids who cut your grass
  2. Prostitutes
  3. Wedding bands
  4. Window washers
  5. Carpet installers

to name but a few.
There is such a thing as context. We're talking about a full time 40 hour a week job. You're talking about jobs that last less than an hour or two (by the way, the employees of that window washIng company probably get paid on a weekly or biweekly basis).

The kinds of jobs I'm discussing almost always pay you every two weeks; occasionally one might pay you weekly, but it would be highly unusual for one to pay you after two days.
  #133  
Old 04-19-2017, 11:29 PM
TokyoBayer TokyoBayer is offline
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Whoosh.
  #134  
Old 04-20-2017, 03:24 AM
Mangetout Mangetout is offline
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Did they ever explain why they needed you to buy bring your own kit?
  #135  
Old 04-20-2017, 07:00 AM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is offline
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It is very dangerous to try to wait two days before paying your prostitute.

edited to add: Or so I've been told.

Last edited by Czarcasm; 04-20-2017 at 07:01 AM.
  #136  
Old 04-20-2017, 07:38 AM
kayaker kayaker is offline
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It is very dangerous to try to wait two days before paying your prostitute.

edited to add: Or so I've been told.
I'm assuming you're hiring her for the weekend.
  #137  
Old 04-20-2017, 07:42 AM
kayaker kayaker is offline
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(by the way, the employees of that window washIng company probably get paid on a weekly or biweekly basis).
For a few months we had a guy who washed the windows in our sunroom every few weeks (a chore my gf hates and I would choose to ignore). We stopped using him because he charged too much and did a lousy job other than the first time.

He was an independent contractor.
  #138  
Old 04-20-2017, 08:43 AM
IvoryTowerDenizen IvoryTowerDenizen is offline
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I'm assuming you're hiring her for the weekend.
Well, under those circumstances you're obligated to have her change your life, heal your heart, and make you want to be a better man. Then you marry her or something.
  #139  
Old 04-20-2017, 08:56 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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"Sure! When can you be there to sign for it?"
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Originally Posted by davidm View Post
In that case at least there'd be an address and a company name.
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Originally Posted by Czarcasm View Post
In cases like this they would go after the only company rep they can nail.

That would be you.
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Originally Posted by davidm View Post
Okay. I'll just say that I'm not actually an employee and can't sign for deliveries and that someone else will have to sign.

But seriously, we're getting way over the top in scam complexity.
LOL. I swear this actually happened this morning.
I'm sitting in my office trying to work out some system configuration issue, and a mail carrier appeared outside my office asking if I would sign for a registered letter. I told him I'm a contractor and don't actually work for the company and therefore probably shouldn't sign for it. I then got up to look for someone to sign for it and couldn't find anyone. The offices were completely empty except for me and the mail man! I'll admit that this did freak me out a little. He suggested that he bring it back tomorrow and I agreed. A minute or two after he left everyone was back. Apparently there was some kind of company meeting in some offices downstairs. I didn't know they had offices on another floor.
  #140  
Old 04-20-2017, 09:19 PM
Dewey Finn Dewey Finn is offline
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You know they were talking about you, right?
  #141  
Old 04-20-2017, 09:26 PM
buddha_david buddha_david is offline
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I'm sitting in my office trying to work out some system configuration issue, and a mail carrier appeared outside my office asking if I would sign for a registered letter. I told him I'm a contractor and don't actually work for the company and therefore probably shouldn't sign for it.
Wise choice by you; that was probably the authorization form to harvest your organs.
  #142  
Old 04-20-2017, 09:54 PM
kayaker kayaker is offline
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Well, under those circumstances you're obligated to have her change your life, heal your heart, and make you want to be a better man. Then you marry her or something.
But I was hiring her for the weekend to paint my house. She said she'd do anything for $800.

  #143  
Old 04-20-2017, 10:49 PM
TokyoBayer TokyoBayer is offline
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But I was hiring her for the weekend to paint my house. She said she'd do anything for $800.
You hire house painters with hearts of gold?

Last edited by TokyoBayer; 04-20-2017 at 10:51 PM.
  #144  
Old 04-21-2017, 12:24 AM
voltaire voltaire is offline
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Apparently there was some kind of company meeting in some offices downstairs. I didn't know they had offices on another floor.
So, which floor do you work on, the 14th or in the basement?
  #145  
Old 04-21-2017, 06:12 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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The third.
  #146  
Old 04-21-2017, 06:38 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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Do they dress alike?
  #147  
Old 04-21-2017, 07:23 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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They wear these weird duck outfits. Joking! No they do not all dress alike.
  #148  
Old 04-21-2017, 07:33 PM
Nawth Chucka Nawth Chucka is offline
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They wear these weird duck outfits. Joking! No they do not all dress alike.
A variety of duck outfits, then?
  #149  
Old 04-21-2017, 07:38 PM
davidm davidm is offline
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Today a man came into the office and they introduced him to me as a candidate for the US Senate. I shook his hand, took his card and went back to my office to continue working while he apparently had some kind of meeting with some of the managers.

Looking at his card I could find no clue as to his party. Going to his website there was no obvious mention of his party on the main page (which is basically a donation form). Only if you go to his "about" page and read halfway through do you discover that he's a Republican! (Apparently one who's reluctant to let on.)
  #150  
Old 04-21-2017, 07:46 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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This is becoming my favorite thread.

You are working for a secret political candidate sponsored by Hobby Lobby!
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