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  #1  
Old 11-13-1999, 04:34 PM
dougie_monty dougie_monty is online now
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Where did this supposedly Arabic song/melody come from? The words I learned as a kid went something like this:
"There's a place in France
Where the women wear no pants.
Stepped on banana peeling
Flew up and hit the ceiling..."
My older brother also came up with:
"There's a place on Mars where the women smoke cigars
And the brand they smoke is enough to choke a goat...!"
  #2  
Old 11-13-1999, 04:51 PM
Fretful Porpentine Fretful Porpentine is online now
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Dunno, but the version I learned as a kid went like this:

There's a place in France
Where the naked ladies dance
There's a hole in the wall
Where the men can see it all...
  #3  
Old 11-13-1999, 04:55 PM
Lumpy Lumpy is offline
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Oh, you mean (attempting to spell the tune):

"La-dee-DAH-da-da, La-dee-DAH-dee-Dah-dee-da"

I have no idea. But I'd strongly suspect it's from some old musical or play rather than a real Arabic source.
  #4  
Old 11-13-1999, 05:40 PM
RTA RTA is offline
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Scottish actor/comic Billy Connolly told a story about when he was a paratrooper in the British Army on Cyprus.
Apparently one of the rites of intoxication was to climb up on a table, drop trousers, clench one end of a long sheet of toilet paper in your butt cheeks, and have someone set fire to the other end. You dance seductively and slow, then all of a sudden frantically and much faster.
Meanwhile all your mates gather about and sing that exotic tune; no words, just "lalala, la, la, lalalalalalala".
I don't know what that all means, but it was so goddamn funny the way he told it I almost pissed myself.

Here's how I learned it:
"All the girls-in-France
take their clothing off and dance,
But the boys don't care,
'Cause they ... " (I forget how that line goes.)
  #5  
Old 11-13-1999, 06:02 PM
SaxFace SaxFace is offline
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Ooooo, I loved that song as a kid. These are the words that circulated on my playground:

There's a place in France
Where the naked ladies dance
There's a hole in the wall
Where the men can see it all
But the men don't care
'Cause they eat their underwear.

These are the best song lyrics I've ever heard! Unfortunetly, I can't provide any additional info on the tune.

------------------
Formerly "Melanie the Computer Idiot"
  #6  
Old 11-13-1999, 06:06 PM
Cactus Rose Cactus Rose is offline
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Somewhere in the song:

And the way they shake
It looks just like a snake.

------------------
- A rose by any other name would still have thorns -
  #7  
Old 11-13-1999, 06:55 PM
Doug Yanega Doug Yanega is offline
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Amazing. Everyone seems to have learned a different version.

"When the girls in France
Do the hula-hula dance
well, they way they shake
is enough to kill a snake
When the snake is dead
They put roses in its head
When the roses die
They put tulips in its eyes

Um-diddle-iddle-iddle
Um-diddle-eye
Um-diddle-iddle-iddle
Um-diddle-eye"
  #8  
Old 11-13-1999, 08:29 PM
NanoByte NanoByte is offline
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Well, I remember it in the KISS form:

Oh, they don't wear pants
In the southern part of France
?
?

Ray
  #9  
Old 11-13-1999, 08:53 PM
Sycorax Sycorax is offline
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All I recall is
Oh the girls in France
They don't wear underpants.

Hmmm...I get the idea French women are kinda slutty.
  #10  
Old 11-13-1999, 09:57 PM
Lawrence Lawrence is offline
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The one I remember (Connecticut, about 1976) is:

There's a place called Mars
Where the ladies smoke cigars
Every puff they take
Is enough to kill a snake
When the snake is dead
They put mustard on its head
When the mustard cracks
They put roaches on its back

and so on. There was a lot more but I don't remember it. Less lascivious than the other versions, to be sure.
  #11  
Old 11-13-1999, 10:39 PM
NanoByte NanoByte is offline
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http://www.thecore.com/~stortz/comedy/cds/drd1.html

"Dr. Demento
Basement Tapes No. 1
*
*
*
17.They Don't Wear Pants in the Southern Part of France - John Bartles"
See also: http://www.drdemento.com/
http://www.awn.com/mag/issue1.9/arti...ierson1.9.html

"Tim Burton's 'Vincent'--A Matter of Pastiche
by Michael Frierson
*
*
*
Scene by Scene
The film opens as the camera follows a cat into an empty room where Vincent plays on his recorder a mournful version of "The Hoochie Kootchy Dance"--known to millions of children in its bastardized version by its opening line "Oh they don't wear pants in the southern part of France."
http://www.gajoob.com/reviews/b/61.html

"John Bartles
Banal Fixations"
http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Olympus/4420/706.html

"706 - Laserblast
*
*
*
HOST SEGMENTS:
*
*
*
"There's a PLACE IN FRANCE..." - From the children's playground song that begins, "There's a place
in France where the ladies don't wear pants," or "...where the naked ladies dance." Subsequent lines vary
depending on where you're from. You're welcome to send your versions; we be interested to see them.
The music in the film's score sounds like the first few notes of the "Place in France" melody.

**********

I dunno where the tune came from. Is it maybe a gypsy thing?

Ray (never even been to St.-Tropez)
  #12  
Old 11-13-1999, 10:49 PM
Triskadecamus Triskadecamus is offline
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Late seventies, pah.

Well, back in the nineteen fifties, in Philadelphia, the song went:

All the girls in France
Do the Hootchi Kootchi dance,
They don't even care
If you see their underwear.
'Cause they don't ever even wear 'em
When they're dancing in the harem . . .

(The meter changes in the last too lines, obviously.)

It was number one on the first grade boys hit parade. Even then, I did not think it was new. My mother assured me that she remembered a similar song from her youth, some time around the 1920's.

<p align="center">Tris</p>
  #13  
Old 11-13-1999, 11:00 PM
MrKnowItAll MrKnowItAll is offline
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Oh, come on! It's the instrumental introduction to Steve Martin's "King Tut". Geez, where you guys born yesterday?
  #14  
Old 11-13-1999, 11:37 PM
Pixoid Pixoid is offline
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We sang this version to hand motions and everything (ah, the fourth grade hand games...). At the end, both people said, "FREEZE!" Whoever moved first lost.

We also sang the SaxFace version, but at different times and different schools. I never really connected the two till now...

============

There's a place on Mars
Where the ladies smoke cigars
And the men wear bikinis
And the women suck zucchinis
Every step they take
They ki-ill a-a snake
When the snake is dead
They put mustard on its head
When the mustard's dried
They put rubies in its eyes
When the rubies break
It's the year of forty-eight.
FREEZE!
  #15  
Old 11-13-1999, 11:50 PM
Wendell Wagner Wendell Wagner is offline
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For versions of this and many other children's rhymes, try the book _Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts: The Subversive Folklore of Childhood_ by Josepha Sherman and T. K. F. Weisskopf
  #16  
Old 11-14-1999, 10:01 AM
Mr. Blue Sky Mr. Blue Sky is offline
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Here's a variation I learned as a kid:

There's a place in France
Where the alligators dance
One didn't dance
So they shot him in the pants
The pants that he wore
Cost a dollar ninety-four
PLUS TAX!
  #17  
Old 11-14-1999, 10:08 AM
krish krish is offline
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This is the version that I learned--

There's a place on Mars
Where the ladies smoke cigars.
Every step they take
Is enough to kill a snake.
If the snakes don't die,
Then they poke them in the eyes.
  #18  
Old 11-14-1999, 10:15 AM
Drain Bead Drain Bead is offline
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My version:

There's a place on Mars
where the women smoke cigars.
Where the men wear bikinis
and the children drink Martinis.
  #19  
Old 11-14-1999, 03:04 PM
Felinecare Felinecare is offline
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There's a land called France
Where the hula-girls dance
And the way they shake
It's enough to kill a snake
When the snake is dead
They put roaches in his head
When the roaches are dead
They put diamonds in his EYES.
  #20  
Old 11-14-1999, 03:32 PM
cornflakes cornflakes is offline
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Quote:
Oh, come on! It's the instrumental introduction to Steve Martin's "King Tut". Geez, were you guys born yesterday?
No, we were singing the "girls wear no pants" lines at least four years before that. Respect your elders, sonny!

Even old New York was once New Amsterdam. But we all knew that, right? Ok, never mind.
  #21  
Old 11-14-1999, 04:32 PM
mr john mr john is offline
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The info is all here MrKnowitall's 'king Tut',Nano's 'Gypsie thing",Pixoids 'hand motions', ( see the walk like an egyptian thread) references to the 'snake (an asp?) it is obvious this is an authentic ancient Egyptian song." Oh the girls in Crete don't wear sandals on their feet,and in their topless dress you can see their bouncing breasts." Ok another tune completly but do you remember, "Oh the ladies wear no pants in Pagopago, no the ladies wear no pants in pagopago,and since they wear no pants, they get chillblains when they dance, cause the ladie wear no pants in pagopago."

------------------

"Pardon me while I have a strange interlude."-Marx
  #22  
Old 11-14-1999, 08:27 PM
neuro-trash grrrl neuro-trash grrrl is offline
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I learned it this way:

There's a place in France
Where the naked ladies dance
There's a hole in the wall
Where the boys can see it all
But the men don't care
They just chew their underwear
The underwear that they chew
Costs a dollar ninety-two...

All but the last verse has appeared elsewhere on this thread. I wonder where the last two lines came from.

------------------
God is dead. -Nietzsche
Nietzsche is dead. -God
Neitzsche is God. -Dead
  #23  
Old 11-16-1999, 04:05 PM
beefymeg beefymeg is offline
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This is MY version, that I learned growing up, early eighties:

There's a place in France
Where the ladies do a dance
And the dance they do
Is enough to kill a few
And the few they kill
Is enough to take a pill
And the pill they take
Is enough to kill a snake...

It was kind of an exercise in rhyming - and looking back, it was pretty lame. Another childhood memory tossed by the wayside...

------------------
Sucks to your assmar.
  #24  
Old 11-16-1999, 04:28 PM
Ukulele Ike Ukulele Ike is offline
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So, going back the the OP, where DID the tune come from?

Is there a clue in JWK's post? Was this the kootch music from Little Egypt's act?

------------------
Uke
  #25  
Old 11-16-1999, 09:24 PM
tracer tracer is offline
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Doug Yanega wrote:

Quote:
Um-diddle-iddle-iddle
Um-diddle-eye
Um-diddle-iddle-iddle
Um-diddle-eye"
WAIT a minute!! I call foul! Those words are from "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious", from Mary Poppins!!

------------------
Quick-N-Dirty Aviation: Trading altitude for airspeed since 1992.
  #26  
Old 11-16-1999, 09:42 PM
Spud Spud is offline
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I'm amazed... since "everyone" knows it goes:

Well the girls in france
Don't wear any underpants
And the guys go around
With their penis hanging down
  #27  
Old 11-17-1999, 01:03 AM
John W. Kennedy John W. Kennedy is offline
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The tune is at least as old as Showboat, which quotes it for "Little Egypt" at the Chicago Exposition. I suspect that Kern did not write it (he often quoted the tunes of other composers).

------------------
John W. Kennedy
"Compact is becoming contract; man only earns and pays."
-- Charles Williams
  #28  
Old 11-17-1999, 09:01 AM
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Ok, our version was--

All the girls in France
Do the hoochy-coochy dance!
And the way they shake
It could really kill a snake!
When the snake is dead,
They will tie it 'round their head!

I later dated a Frenchman (actually named "Jacques, amusingly enough) who told me that all the girls in France do indeed do the hoochy-coochy dance. But he didn't recall any dead-snake tying going on.
  #29  
Old 11-17-1999, 12:35 PM
Arnold Winkelried Arnold Winkelried is offline
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Quote:
actually named "Jacques, amusingly enough
And what's so amusing about the name Jacques?

signed, Jacques

------------------
La franchise ne consiste pas dire tout ce que l'on pense, mais penser tout ce que l'on dit.
H. de Livry
  #30  
Old 11-17-1999, 12:45 PM
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Amusing, dear, because it's a sterotypical "Frenchie" name, like dating a Swede named Sven or a Brit named Cedric.

Jacques also assured me that it's true that "50 Million Frenchmen Can't Be Wrong," though that still seems excessive to me.
  #31  
Old 11-18-1999, 01:50 AM
Nickrz Nickrz is offline
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The factual aspects of this thread seem to have been exhausted (heh). Let's see if anyone in MPSIMS has another version of this doggerel.
Nickrz
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