Attack Of The Killer B (Movie, That Is)

[Czarcasm]

We're talking 99 cent rentals, folks. No "Arthouse" foreign films and no Sundance Film Festival winners. We're talking one week or less in the theatre, low budget, fun flicks.

McCale's Navy-I happen to like Tom Arnold, so sue me!
Dead-Alive-see if you can hang on for the lawnmower scene.
Brain Donors-a dead on pastiche of A Night At The Opera.
Down Periscope-Kelsey Grammer at his easy going best.
The Puppet Master series-I love the theme music.
Gumbally Rally-Cannonball Run without the ego trip.
Shock Treatment-little known sequel to Rocky Horror.
Michael Nesmith's Elephant Parts-funny skits and musical bits.
The Stunt Man-My second favorite Peter O'Toole movie.
Remo Williams-Don't mess with Little Father!
Buckaroo Banzai-"No matter where you go, there you are."
The Sword And The Sorcerer-I want that sword!

[Speleophile]

A Roger Corman classic, actually a really good movie on several levels with great deadpan humor - "Mercy Hospital" is fantastic - on a budget that must have featured Jack Benny as auditor.

[Czarcasm]

Death Race 2000 is an excellent gore-flick, as is the sequel, Deathsport.[edited to fix coding]

[Drastic]

Scanners is a great sci-fi/horror B film. Exploding heads, a wonderfully gory final psychic battle, and a cast that (with the exception of Michael Ironside, who looked Oscar-worthy in comparison) just about redefined "acting" by "what it is not". Not Cronenberg's finest couple of hours, but an old favorite.

Full Moon Entertainment (the folks behind the Puppet Master series) put out some other gloriously bad movies before they started trying to inject deliberate humor, which screwed up the balance of the inadvertent variety--Oblivion largely marked the beginning of the end there. The curdled cream of the crop would be Doll Man, starring Tim Thomerson (of Trancers "fame") as a hard-boiled cop from a planet where people just happened to be a foot tall. He was armed with the Kruger Blaster, the Most Powerful Handgun in the Universe. On his own world, it vaporized people; down on earth it still blew respectable chunks of people into mist.

Cyborg was, I'm still convinced, Van Damme's "finest", as it consisted of no attempt at acting. It was marred slightly by a half-hour walking scene in the middle, but otherwise was redeemed by merely being one long running kickboxing-plus-laughable-knife-fighting match.

I Come in Peace was an amusing tale of giant Aryan aliens coming to Earth, one to turn human brains into an illegal narcotic on their home turf, the other to stop him, and both running afoul of Dulph Lundgren. Featuring deadly flying cd's, and absurdly large alien handguns that seriously upstaged any other actor involved.

[Baker]

Czarcasm, I'm glad to find someone ELSE who loves "The Sword and the Sorceror)!! The year it came out, 1983, I had won a contest that our local paper runs on picking Oscar winners. The prize was a one-year pass to all the theaters in town. Did I ever see movies! If I like something(like TSATS) I would see it several times. Also saw "Motherlode" a lot, and "Chariots of Fire" at least six times. The latter won Best Picture that year.

I want the sword too, but I'd RATHER have the hunky guy Talon, play by Lee Whats-his-name. Too bad that the planned series didn't pan out.

[Czarcasm]

Lee Horsley was a hoot, wasn't he?
I believe the sequel to The Sword And The Sorcerer is being filmed side by side with the long-waited sequel to Buckaroo Banzai.

[woodstockbirdybird]

I just bought a DVD double-feature of 2 Herschel Gordon Lewis drive-in cheapies from 67/68: "For The Hell Of It" and "Blast-Off Girls". The latter features a cameo appearance from Colonel Sanders. Great 60s garage band soundtrack, too.
For the true "B" movies, you generally have to go back a way. They don't make 'em like they used to. Russ Meyer is always good. Also classic are "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls" and "The Switchblade Sisters". And of course, no mention of "B" movies would be complete without bringing up "Plan 9 from Outer Space".

[MsWhatsit]

Cannibal: The Musical. Shpedoinkal!

[minty green]

As far as B-movies go, wsb, I still think Plan 9 is a bit overrated. If you want to go for Ed Wood, check out Bride of the Monster or Glen or Glenda? Terribly funny movies, both.

But for true B-movie entertainment, I highly recommend the following:[list][i][*]Romancing the Stone[*]The Evil Dead[*]Ovelords of the UFO[*]Road House

[minty green]

Uh, that should be Overlords of the UFO.

[frock75]

The Beast Master
Ice Pirates
Hercules Unchained
Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger
Conan the Destroyer
Red Sonja
Clash of the Titans

Just think the Dungeons and Dragons movie will end up on this list 10 years from now.

[Czarcasm]

I cannot believe I forgot Ice Pirates!

[delphica]

The Beastmaster got mentioned! Yay! That's one of my favorite all-time movies. It's just fantastic. I cry every time those weasels sacrifice themselves in the burning pit. Sniff.

I'm not sure if it counts as a B movie, but it is in fact "so awful it's good" -- but The Warriors is a fabulous movie experience. Gang warfare in 1970s New York, with each gang goofier than the last. The Lizzies (lesbian gang), the gang on roller skates, the gang that looks like mimes. My dream Halloween costume is to find a bunch of other people I can convince to dress up as the Baseball Furies, and then ride the NY Subway all night. Probably 99 in 100 people would have no idea what the costume was, but I bet 1 person in 100 would look at us and say "Wow, that just made my night. Well, it would make my night, at least, to see it.

[Geek Mecha]

Tremors- Not the sequels, though; those were utterly retarded.
Killer Klowns From Outer Space- My all-time favorite cheesy horror/sci-fi flick!

I'm tempted to list Dragonslayer and Sneakers, though I'm not sure if they count.

[silent_rob]

I'll have to go with Re-animator and Bride of the Re-animator as some classics.

[tracer]

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For these and many more low-grade flicks, don't miss out on the heaps and heaps of laughingly-bad-movie reviews over at Bad Movie Night.

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[lucie]

Frankenhooker

Mom and Dad Save the World

House (but not the sucky sequels)

[Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor]

"Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."

[Legomancer]

Flash Gordon. It's a lot of fun because everyone in the cast knows they're in a high-camp fun movie - except the guy playing Flash. He clearly thinks he's in a serious film and is just acting his little heart out.

I've tried to watch Buckaroo Banzai three times and never made it through. I heard it once described this way: "Imagine a ten part serial based on the adventures of a rock star adventurer surgeon who battles space aliens. Now imagine only seeing parts 3 and 9. That's Buckaroo Banzai."

[Tars Tarkas]

"Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."

Don't forget the first sequel Return of the Killer Tomatoes!

, starring George Clooney and Gary Condit!!!!

[Ellen Cherry]

I haven't seen it, and I don't think it's a howlingly bad movie as described here -- but in his review Roger Ebert says the latest Jurassic Park movie is, "in its own B-movie way it's a nice little thrill machine."

Which makes me wonder, what ARE the B movies of today? Anyone have a definition?

[The_Raven]

Howyadoin,

Let's not forget Kentucky Fried Movie!

-Rav

[Sofa King]

Blaxploitation put the "B" in... aw, the hell with it.

You can't go wrong with Shaft, Coffy, Superfly, Hell Up In Harlem, and the grandaddy of 'em all, Sweet Sweetback's Baadassss Song.

[silent_rob]

Sofa King, you forgot some classics: Rudy Ray Moore's movies. He's the ex-stand-up comic behind such blaxploitation classics as Dolemite, Dolemite: The Human Tornado, Disco Godfather, and Petey Wheatstraw The Devil's Son-in-law.

[Revedge]

"Head" the Monkees only movie.
"Zoot Suit" a Hispanic musical starring Edward James Olmos when he still had hair.
"The Warriors" classic surreal film. Also by the same director,
"Streets of Fire" a "Rock and Roll Fable."
"Serial" you have to have lived the 70's to understand this one.

[detop]

I just got one the other day, Blind Fury, with Rutger Hauer as a blind swordsman.

[silent_rob]

detop, for shame; that one is a classic film and should be on AFI's top 100!

Actually, that reminds me of another great Rutger Hauer B Movie: The Blood of Heroes.
It in turn reminds me of a fairly recent great B Movie: Six-String Samurai.
Why did TBOH remind me of S-SS? Because if I had a band, it would be named one of the two.

[lno]

Woohoo!

Shameful confession time. In college, I was one of the founding members and eventual president of the Boston University B Movie Association. We watched almost all of the movies already listed.

The best (worst?) part was every February, when, co-sponsored with the African-American student group on campus, we would host a Blaxploitation Film Festival to honor black actors. Shaft, Superfly, The Last Dragon, Black Belt Jones, Cleopatra Brown, et cetera, et cetera.

I'll just list the two movies that have never gotten out of my mind:
The Gladiator (1986)
Tag: The Assassination Game (1982)

The Gladiator is a film about a man who soups up his pickup truck and becomes a vigilante after the Evil Black Car injures his brother. It's crap. I've written a screenplay for a sequel.

Tag features Robert Carradine and Linda Hamilton (!) in a college dart-gun game that Robert takes a little too seriously. You've gotta love it.

The Blood of Heroes is still my favorite Rutger Hauer movie.

[that_darn_cat]

Originally posted by Drastic

Full Moon Entertainment (the folks behind the Puppet Master series) put out some other gloriously bad movies before they started trying to inject deliberate humor, which screwed up the balance of the inadvertent variety--Oblivion largely marked the beginning of the end there. ]

I love Full Moon movies! I actually liked Oblivion, and I loved Highway to Hell. "That Pinto might get you to Hell, boy. But this car will get you back." Hmm, that's not showing up on IMDB as one of their's. OW well, still a fun flick.

Also, Cast a Deadly Spell Lovecraft-esque flick with magic mixed with a Phillip Marlow stytle detective story. Good fun.

[Pixellent]

Hollywood Boulevard: Two trailer editors for New World Pictures, Allan Arkush and Joe Dante, bet their boss, Roger Corman, that they could make a movie cheaper than any movie he had ever made. Being Roger Corman, there was no way he could turn them down. The result is an extremely cheap, very funny parody of New World Pictures itself, focusing on the adventures of a young starlet who lands roles in such deathless classics as Machete Maidens of Mora Tau and Atomic War Brides. Half the fun is in spotting all the stock footage from real New World productions used to pad the movie; the other half is seeing Mary Woronov as The Bitchy Diva From Hell, Paul Bartel as The Pretentious Director, and the immortal Dick Miller as the heroine's agent. With music by Commando Cody and the Lost Planet Airmen. What more can you ask for?

(Incidentally, Allan Arkush went to direct Rock n' Roll High School and Joe Dante went on being Joe Dante, god bless 'im.)

The Final Programme: Possibly the single strangest science fiction film ever made. Almost literally indescribable, except that it bears the same resemblance to the Michael Moorcock novel on which it's based that an acorn squash bears to a Nissan Pathfinder. Very funny. Very weird. A must-see.

Both movies are now available on DVD. Jesus, I love technology.

[katiekilldare]

Noises Off is one of the funniest movies I've ever seen, really. I rented it for $.50 and laughed my head off. Carol Burnett, Christopher Reeve, John Ritter, Michael Caine. Hilarious.

Soapdish also has a great cast (Kevin Kline, Robert Downey Jr, Sally Field) and gets funnier every time I watch it. And I watch it pretty often.

Dead Again is a great one, too - clever plot and it's fun to hear Kenneth Branaugh's American accent before it turned into a Woody Allen impression.

[silent_rob]

Originally posted by katiekilldare
Noises Off is one of the funniest movies I've ever seen, really. I rented it for $.50 and laughed my head off. Carol Burnett, Christopher Reeve, John Ritter, Michael Caine. Hilarious.

Woo!! Right on, katiekilldare! That is such a wonderful movie, and only a handful of people seem to know it even exists. Though, I own a copy (bought it PV'd), so I'm slowly spreading the word, a few new people watching it at a time.

[TommyTutone]

Wow, "Six-String Samurai" was a great movie in that it was original and bizarre.

In addition, I'd like to add "From Beyond", based on a story by Lovecraft and appears to be directed by the same guy who did Re-animator. The lead actor is the same in both, and he fares about equally well in each.

You can't forget "Night of the Comet" either. A delightful blend of "Valley Girl" and "The Omega Man" with a Tempest video game adding a wacky twist at the start/end of the film.

Then there was "Dead End Drive-In", which was sort of a Roach Motel for the UK's (I think it was there, it has been some time) riffraff.

And my favorite, most bizarre B-Movie is easily "Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2000". Besides the fact that not many people die (which you would expect in a slasher flick), the film had enough really bizarre scenes, and best of all, starred Matthew McConahay ("The Wedding Planner") and Rene Zellweger ("Nurse Betty" among others).

[detop]

Originally posted by LlamaPoet
In addition, I'd like to add "From Beyond", based on a story by Lovecraft and appears to be directed by the same guy who did Re-animator. The lead actor is the same in both, and he fares about equally well in each.

Yes it is.

And my favorite, most bizarre B-Movie is easily "Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2000". Besides the fact that not many people die (which you would expect in a slasher flick), the film had enough really bizarre scenes, and best of all, starred Matthew McConahay ("The Wedding Planner") and Rene Zellweger ("Nurse Betty" among others).

You should try Motel Hell then.

[Sofa King]

I just saw the 1966 version of The Killers, which should have been a B picture even if it wasn't. Hell, it's got... well, you'll see.

Anyway, I think this film is a case study of why some second rate films can age like a fine wine. This film should suck, but I would argue that it doesn't any more. Here's why:

* The bad guys are the good guys! Or they're bad, but the others are worse! Or something like that.

* Lee Marvin is doing his latent-H tough-guy bit. I can't even claim to have gaydar, but I'm willing to bet that Anthony Perkins tied this guy up and whipped him at some point. His sidekick is doing a Richard Widmark routine that wouldn't make the lounge at Cable Beach.

* One shot of pure cinema history: Ronald Reagan, Angie Dickinson, and Mr. Roper sitting together pretending to watch a race.

* Shelby Cobras racing at Riverside!

* Ronald Reagan impersonating a cop!

* Big, fat, wallowing American cars barreling through what looks suspiciously like Hazzard County.

* And finally, a dramatic climax that appears to take place at the Cleaver residence.

Like I said, shoulda sucked, but now it's cool. Forget the fractious plot, the rape of Hemmingway, and the Hollywood-mandated ending. You will find no capital "B" anywhere in the name Ronald Wilson Reagan, but it's pasted on practically every picture he ever made.

[naughty wicked zoot]

this is my specialty, i LOOOVVE bad movies!!! i like good ones, too....

anyway:

skeeter
nice girls don't explode
pucker up and bark like a dog
the incredibly strange creatures.......yada yada
blood sucking freaks
orgy of the damned
vampyres
there's nothing out there
eating raoul
barbarella
conan the barbarian
alien from LA
nasty rabbit
gothic


i'll stop now. i could go on and on...

sad, huh?

[Kamandi]

How about Transylvania 6-5000? Geena Davis as the sexiest vampire this side of... well I can't think of a sexier vampire, 'cause Geena is just so yummy. But except for her, the movie stank.

[pesch]

My God, I just realized that three-quarters of the movies I've seen came from this thread.

Speaking of Geena Davis, catch her in "Earth Girls Are Easy." Based on Julie Brown's song. GD first appears in a string bikini ::drool::

Rest of the movie's pretty good, too.

And how come no Troma films listed yet? They're the King of the B's (alongside Bruce Campbell, of course).

[Drastic]

I recently picked up Last Man Standing on DVD, for dirt cheap. Now, Yojimbo was a great film, and Fistful of Dollars was a fine remake after which wise movie-making souls would have left well enough alone.

Luckily, wise souls, especially of the movie-making variety, are fairly rare, so this Bruce Willis vehicle was made. People get too hung up on the bad remake factor--but I think it's one of the great unrecognized comedies of the past few years. Willis gives a marvelous unpassioned performance wherein he wears pretty much the same slightly-open-mouthed blank grimace throughout the entire film, utters perfectly deadpan voice-over lines like "I wanted to stay sharp, so I switched from whiskey to beer", and goes through action scenes in which he doesn't so much pretend to aim his pistols at targets as the targets enthusiastically hurl themselves into his line of fire. Oh, and Christopher Walken, bless his freakishness, puts in a role in which he is...well, a Christopher Walken role.

[Zaphod Beeblebrox]

Anyone ever heard of the movie Rollerblade? There might be more than one film with that title. The one I'm speaking of features semi-nude nuns fighting on roller skates. It's an odd piece of work.

[BJaneDoe]

If I understand the question, you are asking people's opinions of their most memorable B movies (good or bad).

I'm starting to think, from the posts, that maybe B movies aren't what I had always thought they were. I liked Scanners and Cyborg, but I remember vividly that I saw them in the theater first. I have always assumed that B movies were ones that really never made it to the big screen.

On the other hand, ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW has been on the big screen almost from its release. Hummmmmm? Maybe that would be considered a cult film. Oy vey. Now I'm really confused.

Can anyone set the record straight on the differences between cult, B or just low budget movies?

I'm pretty new to this site, so I'm not sure if this question is appropriate for this page or if I need to start a new thread. Questions. Questions. Questions.
?????????????????
By the way, my favorite B movie (as I define them) is, was and always will be MOTEL HELL starring Rory Calhone.

[monster]

Sleepaway Camp

It has a twist ending that rivals The Sixth Sense and Fight Club.

[Bumbazine]

Speleophile beat me to Deathrace 2000 so I submit for your edification and amusement, Lust in the Dust. You'll laugh! You'll cry! (especially when Divine sings!) It'll become a part of you! (I'd recommend Gold Bond Medicated Powder.)

I'm also partial to older Sci-Fi flicks, Rollarball (not the same as Rollerblade), The Omega Man, Forbidden Planet, Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn, Reptilicus and many whose titles I can't remember now. Do those count?

[Umbriel]

I'd like to enter concurring votes for some of the lesser known above, namely Night of the Comet and From Beyond

Another worthwhile "Night of" is Night of the Creeps -- a real gem of a zombie movie (the title is kind of a double entendre comparing zombies and fratboys) with more interesting character development than is generally found in genre films, whatever the budget.

Another oddity I'd recommend, though it doesn't fall in quite the same class as most of these, is Trouble in Mind. It's a slow-moving, vaguely sci-fi-ish, detective noir, featuring the only non-drag performance by Divine that I've ever seen (and he's really great as an organized crime kingpin).

[pezpunk]

Actually I just met the lead character in one of my favorite B series (see here or here . Please ignore the horrible quality and out of control sideburns) Evil Dead and Evil Dead 2. Can't forget Maniac Cop either.

Other notables are;
1. Surf nazis must die
2. Tromeo and Juliet
3. Class of nuke em high
4. pi (Does this count as a B movie?)
5. Return of the living dead 2

[SpaceGhostofArrakis]

What, no He-Man????