A SUV and BMW almost collide. Whom do you laugh at first?

[Zenster]

Yesterday I saw a SUV swerve and just miss colliding with a monster BMW. No impact, (unfortunately) but it still puzzles me as to whom I would have laughed at harder. The fact that the BMW driver was at fault didn't make it any easier.

Work With Me Here,

Chris

[Darqangelle]

When you refer to a "monster BMW", are you talking about a 7-series mega-sedan, or the new X-series SUV?



...hey, details are important! If I'm supposed to laugh, I want to do it for the right reasons.

[Darqangelle]

Actually, the more important question is, why did you post this HERE and not in IMHO? This isn't a "Great Debate"...

[Zenster]

You bet this is a great debate. This was a shiny black brand new 741 series BMW (When they first came out in Germany they were only available in the white color. They soon became known as the 'White Elephant'.) The SUV was a late model Jeep Cherokee. I suppose it would have been better if it was a Ford Excursion, but you have yet to address the central debate as to whom to laugh at first. Me? I was too busy going, "Bwuhahaha... "
__________________

[Odesio]

Originally posted by Zenster
You bet this is a great debate. This was a shiny black brand new 741 series BMW (When they first came out in Germany they were only available in the white color. They soon became known as the 'White Elephant'.) The SUV was a late model Jeep Cherokee. I suppose it would have been better if it was a Ford Excursion, but you have yet to address the central debate as to whom to laugh at first. Me? I was too busy going, "Bwuhahaha... "
__________________

Maybe I just have a different sense of humor. What's so funny about a near collision that could have resulted in one or more parties being injured? Is it funny because they both drive expensive vehicles?

Marc

[NiceGuyJack]

I agree with Marc. I fail to see the humor.
Perhaps someone can enlighten me.

Jack

[Darqangelle]

I don't agree on this being a great debate, actually. You have two people who drive expensive cars... okay.

Then one makes an error in judgement.

...fine.


...so one has to react in order to avoid getting hurt.

...



...still waiting for the punchline.

If this is a post trying to incite a emotional response, then I'm going to have to know more details about either
a) the event
b) the drivers

Seems to me, you've only pointed out something that (sadly) is a common occurance in North America, witht he only difference being that two relatively expensive vehicles were involved.

I don't mean to be a killjoy, I just don't understand the joke.

[casdave]

Were they driving in that "I've got a big and/or expensive vehicle and anyway I own the goddamn road style get outta my way" attitude.

Yes I could find it funny, being a cyclist and a biker I get that all the time, one twat very nearly crashed as he tried to take me off the road, as it was he left a generous portion of his spoiler on the kerbside, if he'd injured himself I'd would have looked at him bleeding, smiled and ridden away.

Here you are stereotyping somewhat, that vehicle was a major cheapo rust bucket.Just goes to show that you don't need an expensive car to be a turd.

[Gaudere]

[Moderator Hat ON]

Sending this off to IMHO.

[Moderator Hat OFF]

[tracer]

I would laugh at the BMW driver, because the SUV is much better built to withstand the force of impact.

Or I suppose I could just drive over their cars in an Abrams tank and laugh at both of them.

[Ukulele Ike]

The joke is not necessarily that they are expensive autos. Not being an idiot, I don't buy Dubya's accusations of "class warfare" every time someone suggests that perhaps the coddling of rich people shouldn't be the main concern of the U.S. government, or the conservative pundits' insinuation that the rest of us envy the conspicuous consumption of the well-off.

The humor is in watching two drivers who have so little concern for their fellow humans that they drive enormous, gasoline-guzzling, smog-belching, road-hogging monster trucks smash into each other, thus bringing the real world bonking into their little cocoons.

Whoops! Thought you were impervious to harm, didn't you? Thought you were above it all, didn't you? Sorry, shithead! The bodywork alone'll cost you five thou! And gas prices are rising again!

Thanks, Zenster. I enjoyed the image.

[Athena]

Originally posted by tracer
I would laugh at the BMW driver, because the SUV is much better built to withstand the force of impact.

Or I suppose I could just drive over their cars in an Abrams tank and laugh at both of them.

Ummm... have you ever looked at the safety specs of a BMW? I highly doubt the bimmer would crumple under the impact from an SUV. They're generally very safe cars.

(incidentally, as I looked at http://www.bmwusa.com for info on the 7 series, I notice that it's completely bullet proof. Now there's a feature you don't see everyday!)

[Mr. Cynical]

I laugh at the person who is picking his teeth off the pavement after I clobber him for laughing at an accident.

[ReservoirDog]

You know what is really funny?

When you see a a kid learning to ride a bicycle and he careens down the sidewalk and bounces off a baby carriage which spins out into the street and it gets smashed by a dump truck and the kid on his bike slams into a light pole face first and the now airborne baby carriage, baby still inside, sails through a plate glass window of a china shop and a random dog that this guy was walking gets really excited and just starts mauling a nearby elderly woman while she waits for the bus and the dump truck driver gets out of his truck and runs into the street screaming and gets clipped by a motorcycle coming in the other direction, which skids out of control, jumps the curb near an outdoor cafe and takes out a whole table of mentally retarded adults on a day trip to the art museum.

God, talk about a dilemna. So much to laugh at, only one sense of humor.

[Jeep's Phoenix]

The Cherokee isn't what I would consider an expensive vehicle though. Ever looked at the price tag on a Dodge Durango?

It would be interesting though to put that BMW up against a Chevy Suburban....

[L. Guardian]

Originally posted by Athena

Ummm... have you ever looked at the safety specs of a BMW? I highly doubt the bimmer would crumple under the impact from an SUV. They're generally very safe cars.

(incidentally, as I looked at http://www.bmwusa.com for info on the 7 series, I notice that it's completely bullet proof. Now there's a feature you don't see everyday!)

Athena,

You may want to go back and read those specs again. The specs say that the 7 series has bullet resistant body panels and bullet resistant glass. There is a big difference between bullet resistant and bullet proof.

Additionally, having bullet resistant body panels and glass will definitely help if you are being shot at, but not if you are in a 30 mph collision with another vehicle. Bullet resistant materials spread the force of a single impact point over a large area to absorb the force of the impact. If you are struck with a fast moving vehicle, bullet resistant material will not prevent damage to your vehicle, or to yourself.


ReservoirDog,

That was just insanely funny!

[xizor]

I would laugh at whichever one was still gabbing into their cell phone after impact. Though the dumbass probably still wouldn't learn to hang up while driving.

[tradesilicon]

Boy, that is a real dilema. Who do I laugh at fist.

Did either car have a child in it at the time? Or do people in SUVs and BMWs not have children?

Did either one steal the vehicle? 'Cause of they didn't, I'm glad they own them, and enjoy them.

Did either one look at you funny?

Did you think for some reason they would be better people if they drive Yugos or Scooters?

And in general, since you find that funny, here's my thought for you: asswipe.

Uke, I'm sure you're an open minded guy and all, and you would never judge people based on the cars they drive. I think. I thought.

[Ukulele Ike]

Remind me never to take in a Marx Brothers movie with some of you people.

"Oh, poor Missus Rittenhouse! Imagine the irrepairable damage she is suffering to her self-esteem! Something should be done about those three bad men!"

trad: Sorry to burst your bubble, but I DO tend to think less of assholes who drive assholemobiles.

[Zenster]

Casdave and Uke Ike both, unlike so many other posters, must actually have a sense of humor. The SUV / BMW incident occurred in Silicon Valley. If you have ever experienced the traffic in this area, and seen the amount of traffic that is directly caused by the rude drivers that disproportionately occupy the aforementioned vehicles, you would appreciate this thread. No one was injured, no children were harmed in the writing of this thread, all events were at less than 20 MPH. But most of all, I detect a real whiff, make that reek, of politically correct overtones. As to the number of raw nerves I've managed to hit with this thread. Let's say that I'm just doing my job.

Chris

[Dawg144]

Uke, so what constitutes an "assholemobile"?

Is it any car that is nicer than the car you currently Drive?

Is it any car that is bigger than the one you drive?

Or is it more envy on your part that you are not driving a nicer car right now and the fact that these people have gone out of there way to drive one of these cars has you just a bit more irritated than you care to let on.

I Drive a big old SUV and I love it and you know what Im the one thats paying for it, the insurance, and the gas so, if that makes me an "asshole" driving an "assholemobile" then so be it.

[Athena]

Originally posted by L. Guardian
Athena,

You may want to go back and read those specs again. The specs say that the 7 series has bullet resistant body panels and bullet resistant glass. There is a big difference between bullet resistant and bullet proof.

Additionally, having bullet resistant body panels and glass will definitely help if you are being shot at, but not if you are in a 30 mph collision with another vehicle. Bullet resistant materials spread the force of a single impact point over a large area to absorb the force of the impact. If you are struck with a fast moving vehicle, bullet resistant material will not prevent damage to your vehicle, or to yourself.

L. Guardian,

I was merely making an observation, not insinuating that either "bullet proof" or "bullet resistant" glass and body panels would do anyone any good during a crash. I figured that putting the observation in parentheses and the use of the word "incidentally" would make this clear. Guess not. And as it was an aside, I simply reported what I remembered - thus the "bullet proof" vs. "bullet resistant" mistake.

[Ukulele Ike]

Originally posted by Dawg144
Or is it more envy on your part that you are not driving a nicer car right now and the fact that these people have gone out of there way to drive one of these cars has you just a bit more irritated than you care to let on.

Yeah...{sob}...you've nailed it...it's expensive car envy...I really REALLY want to be driving an enormous SUV!
Thank you or letting me express my innermost yearnings. Where should I send the check, Dr. Freud?

Okay, I'm out of this thread. I haven't heard this much banana oil since the time I equated SUV drivers with the small-dicked.

[Stuffy]

Zen Ukele, I think somebody hit it head on, you have to be their. FTR, I live in the Bay Area also, neither driver would get much sympathy around here. To comments like Dawgs I can only point to myself as an example and say "Just cause you earn a lot of money doesn't mean screw the enviornment" Personally i'd like to line up SUVs ala worldws greatest stunts, get the aforementioned Abrams....

Oh and before someone wants to mention it, yes I could by a SuV if I wanted, but I rather not pay monumental fuel cost to sit in traffic, next to a guy in a Geo.

[L. Guardian]

Originally posted by Athena

L. Guardian,

I was merely making an observation, not insinuating that either "bullet proof" or "bullet resistant" glass and body panels would do anyone any good during a crash. I figured that putting the observation in parentheses and the use of the word "incidentally" would make this clear. Guess not. And as it was an aside, I simply reported what I remembered - thus the "bullet proof" vs. "bullet resistant" mistake.

Totally understandable mistake. However, to bring up such a fact during a conversation about the potential safety of a vehicle in a crash would logically imply that said fact supports your ideas about the car's safety. I will admit that I assumed that you were intending to use it in that manner and felt obliged to correct you on the point.

However, the car having bullet resistant body panels and glass and being "completely bullet proof" are still hugely different things.

[ReservoirDog]

Originally posted by Zenster
No one was injured, no children were harmed in the writing of this thread, all events were at less than 20 MPH.

Not in my little scenario. There was lots of bloodshed, carnage, anguish, and destruction, including the implied demise of an infant, and a brutal animal attack.

And I really did think it was funny.

For the record, you laugh at the SUV drivers. It does not stand for Super Urban Vehicle, and it shouldn't be driven exclusively through the city streets, fucknugget.

I think BMWs are pretty cool, myself.

[Dawg144]

Really though all SUV's are not that terribly expensive, some are in the high teens all the way to the 60K, I have a more strict criteria for owning an SUV than "I make gobs, and gobs of money". I live in an area that sees substantial snow fall, I love to camp, hike and bring my dogs along while doing it. So those are the reason that I chose to purchase said vehicle. Now I do agree that the average SUV owner toughest obsticle is generally the speedbumps at the mall, but hey to each his own.

Now dont get me started on the gas mileage...

[Spoke]

OK, quick poll:

Do any of the people who got all bent out of shape by the OP not own an SUV or a BMW?

[tradesilicon]

Zenster,

Casdave and Uke Ike both, unlike so many other posters, must actually have a sense of humor.

Actually, I love a good joke, but...

The SUV / BMW incident occurred in Silicon Valley. If you have ever experienced the traffic in this area, and seen the amount of traffic that is directly caused by the rude drivers that disproportionately occupy the aforementioned vehicles, you would appreciate this thread.

Since I am also in the Bay Area, and drive the freeways and several cities daily, I can tell you that asshole drivers come in all vehicles in the same proportions. And since we are fighting ignorance, let's not perpetuate incorrect stereotypes. I also used to ride a bike, but I have noticed many assholes on bikes, who feel it's fine to squeeze in between cars doing 60. Stupid behavior, but I would not laugh if one crashed (or almost crashed). BTW, what do you drive? I'll aim my SUV at you next time I see you on the freeway!

But most of all, I detect a real whiff, make that reek, of politically correct overtones.

Now that is really uncalled for! Political Correctness will not be tolerated in the fight against ignorance. That's the last impression I want to make on anyone.


spoke - how about those who own one of each?

[Homer]

I got all pissy. I'm terribly PC and it bumped my sensibilities. I can't imagine laughing at anything or anyone unless a convention of liberals and pols okay it first. Then, I just snicker. I don't want to overdo it. Might make someone angry.

Nothin like not thinking for yourself. It makes life so much easier.

--Tim

[Zenster]

Originally posted by Ukulele Ike

Yeah...{sob}...you've nailed it...it's expensive car envy...I really REALLY want to be driving an enormous SUV!
Thank you or letting me express my innermost yearnings. Where should I send the check, Dr. Freud?

Okay, I'm out of this thread. I haven't heard this much banana oil since the time I equated SUV drivers with the small-dicked.

Ike, you're a man after my own heart. Some people just can't see a joke even when they get bitten on the neck by one. As for you Mr Cynical, Tradesilicon and Dawg144 if you're thinking of flaming me, to f***ing late. I've already flamed myself in the barbecue pit.

http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...threadid=35623

Eat your hearts out boys and girls.

[Dawg144]

There is no reason to flame either you Zen or Ike, just knowing the fact that there are people out there like you who get bent out of shape by what other people are driving is satifying enough.

[Meephead]

I don't know if I would laugh, but I would certainly be shaking my head at the ignorance of the SUV driver... I personally don't buy into the "SUVs are safer" BS. In general, an SUV is heavier, less powerful (considering its ponderous mass), and far less manouverable.

What this means is that while the driver and passengers may fare better in an accident, the accident may well have been avoided in a more sensible (IMO) vehicle. Also, since the SUV is higher off the ground, it is more likely yo roll over in an accident. Another problem with being higher and heavier, is that whatever the driver of the SUV hits will suffer more for it. Safer for the passengers in the SUV, btu what about the midsize sedan that they hit?

It isn't too much better in the large luxury cars either. At least they are closer to the ground and handle a little better.

I'll get of my soapbox now...

[tiggeril]

Originally posted by spoke-
OK, quick poll:

Do any of the people who got all bent out of shape by the OP not own an SUV or a BMW?

Well, I come from a BMW-owning family. (That sounds awfully pretentious, but my dad has one of the mega-huge 740 ILs... little man, big car. Hmmmmm.) I gotta admit, many many many BMW and SUV drivers think they own the road and devil take whoever doesn't get out of the way. I think it's a matter not only of the money, but of the safety specs, or the appearance of safety. Put a good driver behind the wheel, and your joke falls flat. Put some asshole, cell-phone-gabbing, using-the-Palm-Pilot-while-driving, passing, swerving, and speeding jerkoff behind the wheel of either car, and, well... I start having flashbacks and cowering under furniture. ::shudder:: I drive a little car, and if I had a dollar for everytime a behemoth SUV or some slicked-back yuppie in a BMW/Infiniti/Accord/Lexus has cut me off, tried to take me off the road, swerved wildly, and in one case, rear-ended me (bastard!), I'd be able to afford one of those übermobiles myself.

[Molotov Korova]

I would laugh at the guy who was standing on the curb waiting for his bus and got hit by the bumper/hubcap/shattered glass that flew from the collision,causing him severe pain/hospitalization/headache
and the humiliation of me (and perhaps others) laughing their asses off at him in their own car/walking down the street/eating in an outside cafe.

Either him or the mentally retarded kid in the wheelchair banging his hand on his chest with his tongue lolling out.

Each are both damn funny.

[Jeep's Phoenix]

An SUV less powerful? Most of the decent ones come with at least V8 standard. Then again, there may be a point there--so many people buy those vehicles for looks instead of actual utility and wind up with a V6 and no 4 wheel drive.

[tiggeril]

Originally posted by Jeep's Phoenix
An SUV less powerful? Most of the decent ones come with at least V8 standard. Then again, there may be a point there--so many people buy those vehicles for looks instead of actual utility and wind up with a V6 and no 4 wheel drive.

Ok....

[Meephead]

Originally posted by Jeep's Phoenix
An SUV less powerful? Most of the decent ones come with at least V8 standard. Then again, there may be a point there--so many people buy those vehicles for looks instead of actual utility and wind up with a V6 and no 4 wheel drive.

There is that, plus the fact that most SUVs are built on truck frames and are heavier by several hundred pounds than a car with an equivalent amount of interior space.

...And 4WD? How many people do you know who actually use it. They buy that for looks too, in most cases. There are people who use it, and I am not knocking them, but why pay the extra insurance and gas costs, plus the factor of being less safe on normal roads?

Is it for better traction? I still don't get it. My little truck (yes I haul stuff on a regular basis and need a truck) has a limited slip rearend and in most slippery situations handles as well or better than the 4WD vehicles I see around me. Now an AWD vehicle would be a good plan, but that is another story altogether.

For a few good laughs, and some education along the way, check out these guys: http://poseur.4x4.org

[mangeorge]

Originally posted by Athena

Ummm... have you ever looked at the safety specs of a BMW? I highly doubt the bimmer would crumple under the impact from an SUV. They're generally very safe cars.

(incidentally, as I looked at http://www.bmwusa.com for info on the 7 series, I notice that it's completely bullet proof. Now there's a feature you don't see everyday!)

And your Abrams tank might have even catching either of the two cars.
Peace,
mangeorge

[tracer]

mangeorge wrote:

And your Abrams tank might have even catching either of the two cars.

I'm sorry, mangeorge, but my parser crashed and coredumped trying to handle that sentence.

What did you mean?

[tracer]

Meephead wrote:

...And 4WD? How many people do you know who actually use it. They buy that for looks too, in most cases. There are people who use it, and I am not knocking them, but why pay the extra insurance and gas costs, plus the factor of being less safe on normal roads?

Don't most 4WD vehicles have a lever you can move into the "2WD only" position?

Or is that what "AWD" means?

[Jeep's Phoenix]

My vehicle has all-time four wheel drive, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. After the situations I've been in, I can say that it's definitely worth the extra cost. I was living in a very rural area during Hurricane Floyd. We didn't get too much flooding, but all of the local dirt roads were horribly washed out. A lot of the paved roads were blocked, leaving you with no choice but to drive off-road around the blockage, whether it was a tree or a trailer.

I've also found that the traction is great in rainy weather, but a lot of that has to do with the kind of tires you have. The 4x4 has to help some though--after all, there is power going to all four wheels.

[Tymp]

Oh, dear. I wish I hadn’t opened this thread. Ah, well. Can’t turn back now.

I drive a BMW. I love my car. That’s why I own it. I don’t own it for an image. I don’t own it because I’m pretentious (well, I am, but that’s got nothing to do with the car). I own it simply because I enjoy driving it. Weird concept, huh?

So, Zenster, you don’t appreciate BMWs or SUVs of any sort. Your tastes differ from mine in this. Apparently, that gives you some right to mock me should misfortune befall me. You don’t like my taste in cars, therefore, I am acceptable target for ridicule. That’s how this works, huh? I see. Well, since I don’t like your sense of humor, I feel completely justified in saying that I will laugh when you suffer. I will laugh when you get cancer. I will laugh when your spouse dies. I will laugh when your children are molested and murdered. I will laugh at all this simply because I don’t like your sense of humor.

If I have somehow failed to make perfectly clear to you my feelings, I’d be happy to more thoroughly explain myself in the appropriate forum.

Have a lovely day.

[casdave]

Definition of a creche ?




Collision between SUV s outside a first grade school.

[Ukulele Ike]

Originally posted by Tymp
I feel completely justified in saying that I will laugh when you suffer.

Okay, man. Just don't come crying to us when your yacht sinks.

[Darqangelle]

Originally posted by Tymp
I will laugh when you suffer.

Comedy is based on the misfortune of others...

[DougC]

- - - Anyone?, , I would like some evidence that driving a Ford Expedition is any better or worse for the environment than driving a Geo Metro. - MC

[Unix Geek]

MC,

If you accept the idea that 2 gallons of burned gasoline causes more environmental damage than 1 gallon of burned gasoline AND 2000 pounds of raw material causes less damage than 4000 pounds of raw material AND during most rush hours here in Dallas I don't see a whole lot of Excursions (or other big SUV's) carrying more than one person to work, then yeah, Excurions cause 2 to 3 times the damage of a Metro. Here are the stats:

Metro: 1895lbs, 41mpg, 3 Quarts Oil every 3K miles

Excursion: 7150lbs, 16mgp, 6 Quarts Oil every 3K miles


Of course you're hearing from a person that is still driving a '89 Integra with 208K miles on it! (Still getting 32mpg on the highway!)

[Mr. Cynical]

Originally posted by Zenster
As for you Mr Cynical, Tradesilicon and Dawg144 if you're thinking of flaming me, to f***ing late. I've already flamed myself in the barbecue pit.

Firstly, let me address this by saying that I would not have dreamed of flaming you. The last time I checked, a turd doesn't light.

Secondly, I do not have either a BMW or a SUV. I drive a pickup truck. Granted, it is large, and uses a ton of fuel. However, I use it for its intended purpose frequently. I haul things in it. Those who attended the broncos game along with me this weekend can attest to the pile of leaves still in the bed.

Sure, I keep it clean, and it is my daily driver. But hey, I drive it, I like it, and could not care less about someone who labels me as either "Small Penised" or "asshole" for driving it. I fret not at all.

[Retief]

Lets see if I understand this correctly: two expensive cars nearly colliding is funny, I guess a near miss by 2 18-wheelers would be side-splitting funny. I guess the funniest thing you could think of would be a close call by two jumbo-jets, or perhaps a couple of cruise ships. Excuse me if I don't get it. Must be because I drive a SUV.

I drive a 4wd Toyota Landcruiser & I make no apologies to anyone! It cost me $ 30K, so what, I earned the money I spend it the way I want to. You don't like it 'Tough Titty' - My SUV is diesel powered, never exceeds the speed limit, and its emissions are cleaner than half the 20-year old wrecks drving the roads.

One of my primary reasons for buying the SUV was protection for my wife. I am not worried about other people, they have to take care of themselves, my responsibility extends to my own family. Both my wife and I are carefull, experienced drivers.

Others on this thread have suggested that there might me a touch of envy in your feelings towards SUV and/or BMW owners. I have to agree with them.

Oh yeah my son, the Yuppie, has just ordered one of the new BMW X series SUV's - more power to him, he earned it.