Um, yeah. :dubious: DH got them as a kid as many people do - adult relative gave him a peck on the mouth. No kissing between prodrome and complete healing. Period.
I interpreted the original comment of “no kissing of any kind” to mean he/she never kisses anyone at any time. Apparently, he meant no kissing anyone with a coldsore at anytime…??
I get them 3-4 times a year, mainly when I go a few nights without sleeping well. (Which adds greatly to my stress about not sleeping, “Gotta sleep, going to get a cold sore!”) But my first outbreak was as a teenager when I had a really high fever, 104 degrees IIRC.
When I lived in San Diego, I almost never got them though. Just more proof life is better in Southern California.
ETA: Just reading this thread is making my lip tingle. 
It was part of the poster’s strategy around someone with a cold sore.
“Keep doing” what has kept the poster cold sore-free so far, by doing this around someone with a breakout:
- Wash hands
- Don’t share cups etc
- No kissing
That’s how I took it, at least.
Yes, Ivory, you broke that down perfectly. Thanks!
OK, sorry I mis-read, missed the part about being “around people with breakouts.”
I think I’m a little sensitive about kissing because I get break outs often (at least once every couple months) and I can’t kiss, and if I meet someone new, I have to explain it all to them, and the ones who haven’t been afflicted with it, act like I have the plague.
It’s entirely possible to spread the virus even when you’re not tingling and don’t have an open sore. It’s not nearly as likely as when you do, of course, but it’s still possible. I know it’s a hard conversation to have, but no, you shouldn’t be kissing anyone until you have that conversation and they’re okay with the risk, whether you have a cold sore at the time or not. It’s really horrifically unethical to not give them the information first. And if ethics doesn’t give you pause, consider that at least one person has been put in *jail *for giving his girlfriend herpes without telling her that he had it and tort (civil) cases have found repeatedly that people with herpes have a duty to disclose that fact to their partners before they become intimate, and that they are guilty of “negligence” if they don’t. And remember, there is no such thing anymore as “oral herpes” vs. “genital herpes”. It’s all herpes.
So, yes, you should be sensitive about it. It sucks, and it’s horrid and embarrassing and there will indeed be many people who won’t want to kiss you after they find out you have herpes. And that sucks. But let’s face it - if you have outbreaks monthly, they’re going to find out sooner or later, and probably sooner. Do you want the embarrassment of betrayal on top of the embarrassment of herpes?
For what it’s worth, my stepmom got herpes from a bedtime kiss from her mother when she was a child. She’s always been honest about it, not lacked for willing partners, and she and my dad have been married for 32 years and, through careful diligence and good hygiene practices, he hasn’t gotten it, and none of we three kids got it. It is entirely possible…but it’s only ethical if the prospective partner agrees to the risk.
My husband gets those cold sores, usually when he’s got or is fighting off an illness. We’ve been married 49 years and I’ve never gotten one. Of course, when a sore is active, it’s so disgusting that nobody with any sense would accept a kiss. I’ve wondered if perhaps I’ve got a natural immunity.
I get them a couple times a year (too much sun/ getting a tad sick seem to be triggers)-- when I feel the tingle I gobble a bunch of lysine and it seems to help a lot-- could be placebo/ confirmation bias, though.
I never kissed anyone who had an outbreak going either, but I started getting cold sores around age 24. I hope it works out for you, but it’s not a guarantee, as mentioned.