There’s treasure in them there hills.
Especially when I’m somewhere like on a cruise ship where you have to have your card with you all the time but you don’t want to carry a purse.
You really should have told the store manager, but I understand why you didn’t - just too weird, right? Threw you for a loop.
Wow, thanks for all the kind responses. Yay, I feel better about it just because you guys are all so supportive. I agree that I should go back and report it. I did tell the whole thing to the checker as I was checking out, and she told me sorry, but she was young and didn’t suggest anything else. Also, it was around 9 pm and it’s possible there was no manager there. I think I’ll go back today. Yes, exactly, I was thinking, “Hmm, he has an innocent excuse all ready?” Right… And I have been worried about exactly what other posters have talked about…maybe he’s just building up to his next assault, which will be much worse. And he will use his anger at me for hitting him in the face to justify whatever he’s doing to the next person. I actually did read the Gift of Fear, thanks to whoever recommended that. I guess I need to re-visit it.
My take on the scale of appropriate responses:
1: He’s turned up right next to you multiple times. Appropriate response: Heightened situational awareness, assessment of potential threat, etc. It sounds like you did this.
2: You notice that he’s not actually picking up any groceries, despite turning up multiple times. Appropriate response: Get away from him, and tell the nearest store employee to keep an eye on him, too. You didn’t do this, but it sounds like it was immediately before stage 3, anyway.
3: He starts grabbing your leg. Appropriate response: Immediately inflict sufficient pain to get him off of you, then go straight to store security and call the police. Your instincts were sound enough to start with this reflexively, but it sounds like once your conscious mind took over you didn’t carry through. Yes, the situation was very weird. That’s why you should take it to the authorities.
A pervert stranger is bad enough - but a pervert baby?
This is probably a stupid question, and I’m almost afraid to ask: Do you take the money out of the bra before you get to the cashier, or do you just reach for the boobs right there? :o
And does anyone ever say anything about boob sweat?
I want to know if it’s like change in your pocket where you absentmindedly jiggle it around.
God, when I worked retail I got more damned sweaty dollars… and let’s not even discuss ass pennies. Generally, though, if people are stashing stuff in their bras they get it before they have to put on a show of it in front of the cashier. (I mean, with a debit card, nobody touches it but you these days anyway.)
I suggest that you never get a job as a bank teller. Let’s just say that incontinent people need passbook savings accounts just like the rest of us.
Well, OK—let’s not. For the sake of intellectual edification, however, a simple definition is clearly warranted. I, for one, do not carry loose change in my rectum, and I actually have difficulty (perhaps due to an innate lack of imagination on my part) visualizing exactly how this can be accomplished. Please clarify (ignorance fought, and all that).
ETA: It appears that a partial explanation is hinted at above, but I’m not entirely sure.
I’m so proud of you and the OP! I try to visualize being able to do something like that (I was felt up on a bus when I was young and just left the bus as soon as I could). I really hope I am able to be loud and strong when I need to be.
Well, I don’t think they actually pulled pennies out of their anuses, but there are definitely people out there who keep their money in their jockey shorts.
Just a guess on my part but I doubt ass pennies are in there rattling around loose. Instead there’s probably some semblance of order. My fervent hope is that they’re distributed much like candy from a Pez dispenser.
Several of the women in my frat used to carry knives in their bras.
Good job protecting yourself! Too many people are afraid to assert themselves, for fear of looking crazy or rude. You did well.
You need to report this assault (and it is a criminal assault) to the police right away. Hopefully the store has video surveillance, but even if they don’t the cops may already know who he is. I can assure that this isn’t the first time he’s done something like this.
I’m a cop, and I can tell you that this guy is almost certainly working up his courage enough to rape a woman. He tries something more daring each time, and when he gets away with it (and he really did get away with this, since no one knows his name) he goes to the next level.
Another here to say you definitely did the right thing! Please remember to fill us in once you head back to the store. Don’t put it off thinking it’s “old news” or “they won’t have the tapes”, do it as soon as possible!
I empathize, and in your situation, I don’t think I’d feel “right” until I talked to the manager and got some sort of affirmative action taken.
Yep. It’s handy, and it’s unlikely to be pickpocketed. Women’s clothing is notorious for not having useful pocketseses. The bra creates a small, secure place for stowing items such as money and cards. When one is juggling a baby and a shopping basket, it’s a great alternative to a purse.
I don’t recommend it if the weather is very hot, though. That area can get pretty sweaty.
Good freakin’ on you.
I still remember the absolute panicked expression on a Japanese guy’s face once when he pulled his zip down and started wanking at me. (Yes, it was at me, because it was designed to get a response from me.) We were on a quiet suburban street in Tokyo, it was getting dark, and I was coming home from the grocery store. I walked slowly up to him, sultry look in eyes…and whacked him in the face with my grocery bag. Tins and all. He fled so fast he nearly fell over.
Obviously it’s not safe to do this all the time, but if it is (public place, others nearby etc), then more perverts should be hit in the face, imo. And I totally get what you say about thinking (before it escalates), Maybe I’m overreacting or he’s harmless - women are conditioned to be like that, and the most persistent sex offenders know it and use it to their full advantage. Kudos to you.