Let me translate into McCaininite:
“Hey you! Obama! Get that Kool-Aid stand offa my lawn!”
You’ve been on the wrong boards. I even have the unedited transcripts in which Wilford Brimley expressed his contention at Flavor Aid (and part 2).
Well, he did. He claimed he was capable of setting his own thermostat. Me, I’m dubious.
Based on my research, there’s a 100% chance that you are a tool. There is, however, a 2.5 percent margin of error, so you could be a slightly bigger tool than what I have already calculated.
Based on my research there’s a 95% chance Rael is a tool (plus-minus 3%) which added to your research means that it’s a 195% chance (give or take 5%). There’s a 2% chance that Rael is an Inuit activist with green eyes.
I don’t like Obama. I think I’m not going to vote for him.
Oh dear, is it summertime already? So we can see more of this from kids on break?
FTR, Rael, I’m not voting for Obama. But not for the reasons you list. Hell, a blind monkey can come up with a more reasoned argument. But take your best shot…you’re swimming in the deep end of the pool now.
Since you’ve effectively nullified your vote by voting against Giraffe, I’m now going to vote for Obama. Obama +1. Election’s over for you; you lose. Might as well stay home this year.
:: beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep ::
Sorry, gotta go set my humorstat.
I already cancelled you out, **Q.E.D. ** 
I also hear tell he’s a negro.
You forgot “He’ll take your guns and let fagz fuck yer kids! And he gonna reise taxes but that shouldnt aughta be a surprise becuze he a librul, LOLROfL!!!”
-Joe
That still would have been a step or 3 better than what the OP offered.
These vague “wah, a demmy-crat!” complaints that just parrot the same talking points against non-conservatives that we’ve heard every election, without bothering to list even a single point of support, are even more worthless.
Perfect. Now you’re at -1 QED.
To be fair, he/she could also be a slightly smaller tool than what you calculated.
That’d be 0, Einstein.
Yeah. Afraid I’m gonna have to call “cite” on that one.
How so?
QED-ivylass=0. My vote is -1 for your side.
Giraffe +1 Obama
CS -1 Obama
QED +1 Obama
ivylass -1 Obama
=0
Let’s see, a complete lack of founding for his assertions, a completely incoherent level of rage (that anyone over twenty should be far too fatigued to maintain this close to an election), poor arguments, non sequitours, repetition of tired talking points, assertation of great self-worth and self-importance . . .
Gentlemen, I’m forced to conclude that we’re in the Pit, on the Straight Dope.
I’m sorry. There’s nothing I can do.
Giraffes can’t vote! 