Learning Literature and The Place Of Ill Repute (loooong)

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

Would I see a conversation that began with a long and rather sweetly funny story about a boy trying to get information about sex range across the following topics:

motivating students to read (and the use of unconventional aides therein)
Georgette Heyer (a favorite author - try Venetia, btw)
sex ed in school and at home
Elizabeth Moon (another favorite auther - and try her fantasy trilogy, The Deed of Paksennarion, also somewhat military in orientation)
Why women like “bad boys”
meaning and derivation of the phrase “seeing the elephant”
Chilean Liquor

There are probably others I’ve already managed to miss.

42

Wellllll…some of us think y’all are pretty cute, too. :wink:
I honestly think that, aside from whatever programming “makes” homo / hetero sexuality, women in general are waaaaay too busy evaluating (and possibly mentally dissing) each other to think of that “other” as a sex object. Potential rival does NOT equal potential date.
Besides, a LOT of us were conditioned from the gitgo to just HATE the way we look and the way we are, and by extension, the way pretty much every other woman looks. So it’s pretty damn amazing to those of us that internalized that programming that Youse Guys would think we’re so beautiful.
Oh - And you make us laugh. :smiley:

(Besides, that hairiness makes for friction, and sex ain’t interesting without friction!)

Oh…um…was that my Out Loud Voice?

43

…and now y’know what keeps ME comin’ back. This is one of the few places where I can spout off on pretty much any topic, and wind up learnin’ somethin’ anyway…

44

I apologize. I figured that once this thread had evolved into a “how to get children motivated to learn” sort of thing it was locked into that. I didn’t want to drive it back to a “discussion of human sexuality, and how children learn about that” thing. But I did.

There’s a big difference, and I screwed up.

I really like Master Wang-Ka’s approach. Get the the kids interested in something, and then just feed the important stuff in gradually. Trick 'em into learning. That’s brilliant, and I wish I’d thought of it first.

That dealt with, I’m going to steer this right back to human sexuality. Because I’m like that (insensitive) and I’m learning some things.

I freely admit that I am retarded. To this day, I am utterly hopeless when it comes to dealing with the fairer (and infinitely more desireable) sex. I have no earthly idea what they are thinking, feeling, or wanting. I think about how things work, I feel irritated because my knees aren’t working the way I’d like, and I want to have a beer and relax for a few minutes sfter work. I’m simple.

What is she doing?

I have a roof over my head, a furnace giving me warmth, enough to eat, and a bit of free time to enjoy myself in. What else do I need? Besides the woman, I mean.

That’s it, really. What do women want? What does that one, special, angelic creature who deigns to spend her time with me really want?

Is it just the roof, the clothing, the heat, and the food? Can’t be. I’ve had women stick with me when I could barely provide two out of four. She just seems to like being around me. Why? I don’t understand

I’ve got a woman, a house, and a job, and to be honest I understand how I got two of the three. I worked for them. I’ll be damned if I understand how I got the third, but I’m grateful.

45

That gratitude is probably precisely one of the reasons.

46

Pfffft. As I recall, the OP was about both, and more.

I didn’t invent it either, but I’m not proud. If it works, I’ll use it. I’ve found, over the years, that kids are ALWAYS more motivated if they think they’re doing something subversive, or getting away with something they shouldn’t, or getting something for nothing. It ain’t a new concept. Tom Sawyer used the method to get a fence painted, and profited in the doing. But some educators absolutely hate the concept…

Heh, heh, heh…

I concur with AvhHines; not taking a woman for granted is always a plus. Particularly if the woman in question knows what it’s like to be taken for granted. :frowning:

47

I think the both of you are being too kind.

I’m not doing anything on purpose, I’m just sort of being.

I don’t know, maybe she likes the being thing, because the house and the job aren’t all that exciting. She’s here, and that’s great, but I get the feeling that she’s waiting for something, like little kids wait for Christmas.

There isn’t anything else.

It’s just this.

48

Hm.

While I cannot comment knowledgeably about YOUR life, I can do so about mine.

My wife loves me for a variety of reasons. Some I understand. Some I don’t.

I understand that my habit of not coming home drunk helps quite a bit. My sense of responsibility is a goodie. My habit of maintaining some sort of employment more or less continuously is a bonus. I know how to cook, and often do. And I do very good foot massage.

Been described as The Ideal Second Husband, me… :cool:

In fact, much of what I do best is not be anything like her FIRST husband.

Might any of this describe your situation?

49

And the topic is now:

Why does my wife love me (or at least stay with me) or what makes a good husband? :smiley:
Seriously, there are a LOT of men in the world who like sex a whole lot, but don’t particularly like women. John Mellancamp sang (approximately): “I need a woman who won’t drive me crazy - one who’ll just thrill me and then go away.” I think a lot of us feel an ongoing sort of pressure to keep our own interests and activities kind of under the radar so that men won’t be bored. Finding a man who sincerely finds us interesting, even fascinating, and who really, really wants us in his life, not just as a background but there, can be worth its weight in gold.

Women have trouble understanding men too, you know. I think most men find themselves a woman they think they can stand over the long haul, and then think to themselves: “Good, now that’s settled. I can get on to the important stuff.” And also, that once they’ve said “I love you.” to a woman, that should remain the assumed default until the woman is notified otherwise.

Women, at least in the US, have a different socialization. For most of us, regardless of how important career may be, finding and maintaining the primary relationship is the important stuff, perhaps not the only important stuff, but certainly one of the most important. And many of us, raised as we have been in this society, will always have a major part of our self-worth wrapped up in our desirability, no matter how successful we are in other areas in our lives. Finding a man who helps us feel successful in these areas is invaluable.

That being said, both exgineer and Master Wang-Ka’s posts would indicate that they are interesting, thoughtful, good men eminently worthy of love in their own right. It doesn’t surprise me in the least that either of you found good and loving wives.

50

When in high school Shakespeare bored me to tears. We only read and talked about it, never even saw a performance!

Then I was housesitting for my grandmother and watched Measure for Measure, done by the BBC. Where was that play when I was in school? Sex jokes, fornication, lust, sneaking around in the night, it was a blast! I think if we started the high school students out on it, or Twelfth Night, with it’s cross dressing and so on, we’d get students to appreciate it sooner.

I read a book in high school Spanish, El Sombrero de Tres Picos. The cheap edition we had said three short passages had been excised to make it more appropriate for young students. First time I got a chance I went down to the public library and got the uncut version, to see what I was missing.

AS a backward youngster(female) it took me until a seventh-grade sex-ed class to learn about intercourse. Trying to visualize what the book was describing the first thing I thought of was “That means my parents…ewwwwww!” And some of the adult books I’d read made a whole lot more sense.

51

Sing it, Sister!

After I gave up on my practice marriage, my line was, “Who’d want to get involved with me? I’m smart, I’m opinionated, I’m independent, and I can make my own way in the world. Who’s going to put up with that?”

Turns out that that some guys get it, and actually like smart, mouthy, fiscally responsible women. You know, kinda like a lot of the guys who post here :slight_smile:

As for that “older women” thing – turns out that The Right Guy For Me turned out to be 12 years younger. Who knew?

52

Well, y’know, our culture pounds a lot of stress onto that “desirability” point. Guys like Sean Connery and Harrison Ford aren’t getting any younger, but their asking price to be in one’s films hasn’t dropped much.

On the other hand, how many actresses out there who are between Ford’s and Connery’s ages can say they’re getting as much work as either of them? Even with a lower price tag? Man, if they ever remake The Graduate, they’re going to have hell finding someone to play Mrs. Robinson. And that’s a shame. A smart woman can be devastatingly sexy at nearly any age, in ways that the twentysomething set can’t begin to touch, for sheer lack of knowledge and experience. Unfortunately, most of the people who lay their ticket money down on Opening Weekend are twentysomethings…

I hadn’t really thought about thoughtful guys frequenting the Dope, but it makes sense. The place is an intellectual playground. And it’s not like there’s any porn around here, unless you really, really search a lot of the TMI threads… and even then, it’s pretty sparse.

I can’t see why any guy would get involved with a woman on any kind of long-term basis if he WASN’T interested in her. What, is the sex that great? You know, other women can have sex, too. I went and investigated, just to make sure. The reason I’m married is because my wife is very unique, very interesting, very funny and special to me. She continues to hold my attention and affection, even with her clothes on. :wink:

As opposed to dumb ones? Dumb, timid ones? Smart timid ones? Dumb mouthy ones? And don’t even get me started on fiscal responsibility.

No woman has ever held my interest by keeping her mouth shut.

And you can interpret that one any way you like. You’re probably still right. :smiley:

53

So, the fact that my 33rd birthday is looming close is NOT actually a death-knell for my dating life?

This is also reassuring. :cool:

I love this place! Good stories, sensitively written. Thread themes switching as they go, leaving me helpless with laughter and with a fair bit to chew on. And a boost to the ego, just when I wasn’t looking for it, and even though it was not directed at any particular individual. Cheers!