# The BBQ Pit **URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/c/the-bbq-pit/11.md?page=256 [Latest](https://boards.straightdope.com/latest.md) · [Categories](https://boards.straightdope.com/categories.md) · [Tags](https://boards.straightdope.com/tags.md) **Page:** 257 --- ## [one divided by none just isn't fucking done](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-divided-by-none-just-isnt-fucking-done/571413)
**Author:** [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tao_s_Revenge)\ **Replies:** 82\ **Last updated:** [February 17, 2011, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/one-divided-by-none-just-isnt-fucking-done/571413 "2011-02-17T08:05:08Z")
Okay listen up family. You smoke, your poor and you can’t seem to get your shit together to get your own running car. You’re my family and I love you, but you made some really god damn bad decisions in life. But it’s yo… --- ## [It's time for the Valteron rule](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-for-the-valteron-rule/570978)
**Author:** [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Replies:** 32\ **Last updated:** [February 16, 2011, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/its-time-for-the-valteron-rule/570978 "2011-02-16T20:13:08Z")
There has, through my years on the SDMB, once in a while been a rule pointed at one specific poster. The Handy rule prohibited that poster from offering medical advice; the Reeder rule limited that poster from every day … --- ## [Thanks for calling in drunk today, you stupid fucks!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thanks-for-calling-in-drunk-today-you-stupid-fucks/570619)
**Author:** [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Replies:** 89\ **Last updated:** [February 15, 2011, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thanks-for-calling-in-drunk-today-you-stupid-fucks/570619 "2011-02-15T22:57:00Z")
The day after the Super Bowl and it is a typical busy as fuck miserable Monday at work. But, it seems even busier than normal, I wonder why? Ah, yes, lots of people were ‘sick’ today. Most of them male, ages 25-40. I don… --- ## [Fuck you. Shovel your sidewalk.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-shovel-your-sidewalk/570141)
**Author:** [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)\ **Replies:** 325\ **Last updated:** [February 15, 2011, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-shovel-your-sidewalk/570141 "2011-02-15T21:56:37Z")
But I’m a lazy shit-heel and can’t be bothered. Fuck you. Shovel your sidewalk. I just do my driveway so it’s convenient for me and screw everyone else. Fuck you. Shovel your sidewalk. I’m old and infirm can’t ask … --- ## [Insane rant here so I don't wrap my hands around somebody's throat IRL.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/insane-rant-here-so-i-dont-wrap-my-hands-around-somebodys-throat-irl/570671)
**Author:** [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Replies:** 88\ **Last updated:** [February 15, 2011, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/insane-rant-here-so-i-dont-wrap-my-hands-around-somebodys-throat-irl/570671 "2011-02-15T17:20:36Z")
I have an 11-month old. Currently, he is on his 4th round of antibiotics for a persistent ear infection. If this fails, it’s time for tubes. My wife and I are worried sick. The Ogreling is absolutely miserable. His … --- ## [Dummy politicians need to learn to send cock pics.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dummy-politicians-need-to-learn-to-send-cock-pics/570868)
**Author:** [@Cubsfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cubsfan)\ **Replies:** 26\ **Last updated:** [February 15, 2011, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dummy-politicians-need-to-learn-to-send-cock-pics/570868 "2011-02-15T03:32:30Z")
http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/09/ny-rep-chris-lee-resigns/?hpt=T2 How many of these types of incidents will their be before celebs and politicians learn the age old rule that you only send pics of your co… --- ## [Champion-of-Truth and his "sources"](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/champion-of-truth-and-his-sources/571113)
**Author:** [@Ibn\_Warraq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibn_Warraq)\ **Replies:** 165\ **Last updated:** [February 14, 2011, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/champion-of-truth-and-his-sources/571113 "2011-02-14T18:43:48Z")
In the “Muslim Marvelousnous” thread Champion-of-Truth has been spending lots of time alternating telling people how much he hates Muslims, hurl insults at other posters, and insist that Barack Obama was born in Kenya an… --- ## [Fox News focus group of likely Iowa GOP caucus-goers don't trust Obama on Egypt because he's Muslim](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fox-news-focus-group-of-likely-iowa-gop-caucus-goers-dont-trust-obama-on-egypt-because-hes-muslim/570701)
**Author:** [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Replies:** 100\ **Last updated:** [February 14, 2011, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fox-news-focus-group-of-likely-iowa-gop-caucus-goers-dont-trust-obama-on-egypt-because-hes-muslim/570701 "2011-02-14T16:41:27Z")
Here’s the story: --- ## [Jan. 21, 2009 .Do you advise former president Bush to limit his foreign travel?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jan-21-2009-do-you-advise-former-president-bush-to-limit-his-foreign-travel/348018)
**Author:** [@alaricthegoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alaricthegoth)\ **Replies:** 141\ **Last updated:** [February 13, 2011, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/jan-21-2009-do-you-advise-former-president-bush-to-limit-his-foreign-travel/348018 "2011-02-13T19:43:34Z")
“Once he he leaves office, it’s difficult to think of any country Bush will be able to set foot on the tarmac (apart from Saudi Arabia, or Kuwait) where a posse won’t be waiting to haul him in for crimes against humanity… --- ## [karma is a knife welding cock (of the avian kind)](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karma-is-a-knife-welding-cock-of-the-avian-kind/570652)
**Author:** [@The\_Tao\_s\_Revenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tao_s_Revenge)\ **Replies:** 48\ **Last updated:** [February 13, 2011, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/karma-is-a-knife-welding-cock-of-the-avian-kind/570652 "2011-02-13T12:29:10Z")
Man stabbed to death by cockfighting bird Later the rooster was seeing coating the man in 11 herbs and spices. On one hand It’d been better if they saved him, and he saw the light and went on to live a good lfie, but… --- ## [New Rules Apply And I'll Tell You What They Are](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-rules-apply-and-ill-tell-you-what-they-are/571200)
**Author:** [@TravisFromOR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TravisFromOR)\ **Replies:** 2\ **Last updated:** [February 13, 2011, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-rules-apply-and-ill-tell-you-what-they-are/571200 "2011-02-13T11:01:38Z")
Champion-of-Truth– If you want to cite right-wing sources, stay away from WND. Instead use sources that normal people might actually respect, such as: The New York Post, or even (gasp) FoxNews. --- ## [New Rules Apply And I'll Tell You What They Are](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-rules-apply-and-ill-tell-you-what-they-are/571198)
**Author:** [@Champion-of-Truth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Champion-of-Truth)\ **Replies:** 31\ **Last updated:** [February 13, 2011, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/new-rules-apply-and-ill-tell-you-what-they-are/571198 "2011-02-13T10:57:00Z")
Ok, new rules for those who want to debate me. First, anyone who has made a false claim about me must either prove that claim, or admit they were wrong and apologize, otherwise don’t waste your time responding to me - I … --- ## [I Pit Hosni Mubarak](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-hosni-mubarak/569970)
**Author:** [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Replies:** 146\ **Last updated:** [February 13, 2011, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/i-pit-hosni-mubarak/569970 "2011-02-13T06:16:56Z")
Dear Mr. Mubarak: You are a very inconsiderate person. There. You can stand up to your own people in the street, but now you have been Pitted on the Dope. Soon you will fall! :smiley: All, please feel free to suppl… --- ## [Is this common practice for banks? WTF?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-common-practice-for-banks-wtf/570399)
**Author:** [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Replies:** 57\ **Last updated:** [February 12, 2011, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-common-practice-for-banks-wtf/570399 "2011-02-12T05:16:41Z")
Seriously, what a dick head move! The other day I had to write a check to my AC/heating guy. It was big enough that I knew I had to move some money from my savings to my checking account. Then I thought about it for a m… --- ## [Fuck you, Christina Aguilera](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-christina-aguilera/570488)
**Author:** [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Replies:** 151\ **Last updated:** [February 12, 2011, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/fuck-you-christina-aguilera/570488 "2011-02-12T03:49:01Z")
If you’re going to sing the national anthem in front of millions of patriotic Americans, please learn the lyrics before you go out there. It’s not that hard. You’ve been singing it your entire life. Now, I know that i… --- ## [Three things pissing me off right now](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-things-pissing-me-off-right-now/571022)
**Author:** [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Replies:** 21\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-things-pissing-me-off-right-now/571022 "2011-02-11T22:58:36Z")
1. We should do what I want, because it just so happens that it’s also what our Founding Fathers intended. If I hear the words “Founding Fathers” one more time I am going to scream. I’ll grant that the US constitution… --- ## [Cheapskate customers...](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheapskate-customers/569763)
**Author:** [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Replies:** 75\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/cheapskate-customers/569763 "2011-02-11T22:41:54Z")
Another day in the ongoing saga of Drach and his computer shop. Customer calls up all excited and all in a hurry that he needs a new gaming machine…now now now now! On sunday, my one day off. Did I mention now? So I … --- ## [Damn pregnant coworker](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-pregnant-coworker/570673)
**Author:** [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Replies:** 59\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/damn-pregnant-coworker/570673 "2011-02-11T17:42:13Z")
I pit whiney bitch pregnant women. There are three people in my department and one of them is gone for a few weeks. No problem, me and the other person can pick up the slack. That is unless one of those people is a whine… --- ## [Dear paper towel filler person....or non-Christmas mini-rants](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-paper-towel-filler-person-or-non-christmas-mini-rants/565389)
**Author:** [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Replies:** 517\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dear-paper-towel-filler-person-or-non-christmas-mini-rants/565389 "2011-02-11T17:37:06Z")
Apologies, this is way mild, and as per usual I have no colorful, fun, 4-letter outrage type words for you. However this IS very annoying. Look, I know that your job probably sucks, and that filling up the paper towel … --- ## [terryobrien80, get fucked](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terryobrien80-get-fucked/570982)
**Author:** [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Replies:** 49\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/terryobrien80-get-fucked/570982 "2011-02-11T16:32:51Z")
Quickest pitting ever? Hah, they didn’t rape children, then raped 14 year olds, so we’re cool right? And no, just because you said you’re not excusing it doesn’t mean that you didn’t do just that. Also, quit it with t… --- ## [AshenLady....](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469)
**Author:** [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Replies:** 230\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ashenlady/570469 "2011-02-11T16:13:39Z")
Today I went out and hugged a Muslim in your honor. It was fun :slight\_smile: --- ## [Is Wolf Blitzer a moron?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-wolf-blitzer-a-moron/570965)
**Author:** [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Replies:** 12\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-wolf-blitzer-a-moron/570965 "2011-02-11T14:32:07Z")
I just watched most of Wolf Blitzer’s interview with the Egyptian ambassador, clarifying what Mubarak said in his speech. Essentially, the interview consisted of Blitzer constantly asking for clarification of Mubarak’s h… --- ## [Hitler’s Mufti](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hitler-s-mufti/571005)
**Author:** [@terryobrien80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terryobrien80)\ **Replies:** 18\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hitler-s-mufti/571005 "2011-02-11T12:08:44Z")
Hitler’s Mufti By Matthew E. Bunson http://www.catholic.com/thisrock/2009/0901fea3.asp Rest of story\> http://www.catholic.com/thisrock/2009/0901fea3.asp --- ## [Thanks for letting your bratty spawn sneeze on me](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thanks-for-letting-your-bratty-spawn-sneeze-on-me/570802)
**Author:** [@TravisFromOR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TravisFromOR)\ **Replies:** 32\ **Last updated:** [February 11, 2011, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thanks-for-letting-your-bratty-spawn-sneeze-on-me/570802 "2011-02-11T01:36:16Z")
So I was working as a cashier (I’m actually a PIC, but we were shorthanded on Saturday) and this stupid woman’s stupid snot nosed kid sneezes in my face. She didn’t even apologize for her darling son. Now I’m afraid my … --- ## [@#$%ing WORTHLESS HR department!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ing-worthless-hr-department/570552)
**Author:** [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Replies:** 37\ **Last updated:** [February 10, 2011, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ing-worthless-hr-department/570552 "2011-02-10T22:32:19Z")
Several months back, I started a new job. On my first day, I had a pretty big issue with another employee. I won’t get into it here, because it’s a long story, but to put it simply he tried a bunch of intimidation tactic… --- ## [Rep. Jack Kingston of Georgia on Bill Maher: Jesus what a fucking dumbass](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rep-jack-kingston-of-georgia-on-bill-maher-jesus-what-a-fucking-dumbass/569394)
**Author:** [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Replies:** 162\ **Last updated:** [February 10, 2011, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/rep-jack-kingston-of-georgia-on-bill-maher-jesus-what-a-fucking-dumbass/569394 "2011-02-10T00:37:44Z")
I just saw a replay of Maher’s show tonight. He had on Congressman Jack Kingston (R-GA), and during an argument in which Kingston kept denying global warming an falsely claiming that the science wasn’t “settled,” yet, Ma… --- ## [Want a grandchild, your daughter won't provide one? Hire a rapist!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-grandchild-your-daughter-wont-provide-one-hire-a-rapist/570512)
**Author:** [@ctnguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ctnguy)\ **Replies:** 52\ **Last updated:** [February 9, 2011, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/want-a-grandchild-your-daughter-wont-provide-one-hire-a-rapist/570512 "2011-02-09T22:47:27Z")
(Yeah, I know, another rape thread.) You know parents who keep bugging their children about producing grandchildren? Well, one mother has taken it to a new extreme: Mom ‘hires’ man to rape her daughter I pit you, you… --- ## [Just check my groceries, please. Without the fucking commentary.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-check-my-groceries-please-without-the-fucking-commentary/569801)
**Author:** [@El\_Presidente](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Presidente)\ **Replies:** 164\ **Last updated:** [February 9, 2011, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/just-check-my-groceries-please-without-the-fucking-commentary/569801 "2011-02-09T08:04:49Z")
Just got back from the local supermarket to pick up some groceries. Among the items I purchased was some club soda and Tom Collins mix. As the lady is checking the order, and sees the beverages, she says, loud enough for… --- ## [Hey Fuckhead neighbor! Pull your dog inside, you inconsiderate fuckbag!](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-fuckhead-neighbor-pull-your-dog-inside-you-inconsiderate-fuckbag/570170)
**Author:** [@crypto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crypto)\ **Replies:** 37\ **Last updated:** [February 9, 2011, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hey-fuckhead-neighbor-pull-your-dog-inside-you-inconsiderate-fuckbag/570170 "2011-02-09T03:08:29Z")
The neighbor is a bit of a boob. He tends to do things in an abrasive fashion, whether it’s snowblowing his level driveway at 5:30 am (with the house lights illuminating the neighborhood, and his big snowblower headligh… --- ## [Bill O'Reilly: Fucking tides, how do they work?](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bill-oreilly-fucking-tides-how-do-they-work/570150)
**Author:** [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Replies:** 140\ **Last updated:** [February 8, 2011, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bill-oreilly-fucking-tides-how-do-they-work/570150 "2011-02-08T21:41:57Z")
It’s more a PALATR Pit than a real angry Pit. But it’s Bill O’Reilly, so by sovereign law it has to go here. So a little while ago Fundamentally Oral Bill got asked by someone how tides worked. You know, because when … [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/c/the-bbq-pit/11.md?page=255) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/c/the-bbq-pit/11.md?page=257)