View Full Version : I'm having trouble deciding whether to move

06-20-2003, 08:31 AM
Hey there,

I need to decide by the end of this month whether I'd like to extend my apartment lease in Chicago another year. I've always had a problem with making "big" decisions or commitments.

I'm 23, have been here for five years, and am itching to try a new city -- I have Boston in mind. I'd appreciate any opinions or advice you might be able to give me regarding this. Here are my reasons:

For staying: I wouldn't have to move, I have a job with nice benefits (which would be stupid to give up in these times, I hear), and I have a cute network of friends. (These are mostly practical things that, say, my dad would prioritize.)

For leaving: I want to try someplace new, I feel it would encourage new things (like friends, jobs, activities), I would feel a little more actualized. (These are mostly philosophical things that many people my age seem to identify with. You know, they say, "Go for it!" or "If that's what you want to do, do it!" They are things that aren't really contingent upon money, obligations, economy, etc.)

So there it is. One side of me really just wants to sign the lease and settle down for another year, working, building work experience, waiting out the economical rollercoaster. But then the other side of me weeps at the thought of spending another of my formative years in a place where nothing has happened for the past year. Blargh.

I realize that it's not so much the location one lives which matters, but what the person does with his or her life. A good friend gave me the bit of advice, "Wherever you go, there you are." And that makes sense. Maybe I'm fantasizing that a change in location would magically make me into some sort of happy, productive person. So should I stay? Or am I being lazy?

Thanks for any help...

06-20-2003, 08:46 AM
I'd stay for another year. If you move and your job situation sucks, you will have all those little obnoxious details hammering away at your brain. Like money, healthcare, roof over head, etc.

Of course, I'm from the Chicago area, and I can't think of a nicer city to be in. Wait til the economy picks up. Then you'll be the hot commodity and they'll be begging you to work for them.

06-20-2003, 09:55 AM
I'd be hesitant to move without a guaranteed job. Boston's a fairly expensive place to live and employment prospects are bad all over, from what I hear. Why not stay where you are for another year, save your money, then make a go of it next year? You'll have a little bit of cash saved up. And maybe you could visit a few times (at different seasons) to see if you like it.

Course I'm 23 and content to stay in Atlanta for a while, so maybe I shouldn't be giving advice.

06-20-2003, 12:35 PM
I'd try to find a new job first and then be outta there. If the opportunity presented itself to me to go somewhere else, I'd be out of this city so fast your head would spin.

The smartest thing, though, is to do what GMRyujin said and save some money and think about it for a while.

06-20-2003, 02:38 PM
Thanks guys.

I know it was a lot of boring crap to read (my OP), but I really appreciate the responses. I guess making decisions based from realistic circumstances sometimes has to happen, right? I'm not less of a person or less independent if I make a decision which takes into account the economy, right?

Thanks again.

06-20-2003, 05:14 PM
Well, it's cute and all to go larking off to a new city, but Boston's mighty cold in the winter, and if you get stuck there without a job or a home, it'd suck majorly. And most apartment complexes do take employment status into account.

That said, if you really want to move to Boston, could you sign a shorter (or month to month) lease in Chi-town then go to grad school/school of some kind in the fall or spring? My thinking here is if you get housing via school, well, it may suck, but you'd be in a new city improving your education. I'm mainly thinking of the Financial Aid angle here if things get tight.

Or, alternately, perhaps you could telework or telecommute to your current job from Boston?

Or you could start looking now and, heck, maybe they'd pay for your relocation (depending on your industry and such) and save you some of the pain of moving.

Doing great (stupid) young people things like flitting off to a new city on a whim is a nice idea, but I'd be hesitant until the economy picks up some. It may be practical and boring, but spending a winter homeless in Boston would suck.

06-20-2003, 09:10 PM
If you really can't stand the idea of sticking it out another year where you are, I'd sit down and really think about what a move to Boston would entail. Do you have a backup plan if things don't work out? Do you have specific skills that would probably get you a job out there? If you don't know anyone in Boston, how would that affect you? (Would you be lonely, and would that loneliness be intolerable?) Could you come back to your current job if you left it?

It seems to me that just picking up and moving on works well for some people. They just pick up and go, and it all falls into place for them. Other people, it isn't agreeable to them.

Good luck with whatever you decide!