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Daithi Lacha
04-05-2005, 09:17 PM
OK, I'll admit it. If there's no book next to me while I'm on the john, I go nuts. I'll read the Scott Tissue wrapper or the Lysol label if I have to but I GOTTA READ. It just doesn't feel right, otherwise. My father was a reader before me, and it's from him I learned this habit.
So - - who else reads in the can? And is it just a guy thing? I mentioned this to a young fella I work with, and he looked at me as if I had just said that I eat my own excreta as well. I assumed it was pretty widespread (no pun intended), but I guess not...

Kyyrewyyoae
04-05-2005, 09:47 PM
So - - who else reads in the can?

Of course I do! There's no TV or computer in there. You can't read just anything in there, though. Magazines and humor books are about right; I wouldn't dream of bringing a novel or something else literary.

LifeOnWry
04-05-2005, 09:47 PM
I'm female and I read in there, too. In fact, the back of the commode is where I keep all my Straight Dope books.

dalej42
04-05-2005, 09:54 PM
May I suggest my earlier thread (http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=297249&highlight=bible+bathroom) about reading the Bible in the bathroom?

Lissa
04-05-2005, 09:55 PM
I have no reason for this, but I find reading material in the bathroom to be inexpressably vulgar.

I cannot explain it. Every time I see reading material in someone's bathroom, I think, "Christ Jesus, how crass!"

Ace309
04-05-2005, 09:56 PM
I read, but I also keep a stash of half-completed crossword puzzles.

Yup, I write on the can.

danceswithcats
04-05-2005, 11:10 PM
Trade journals, entertainment mags, NTSB accident reports all go to the can with me. The latter can be dangerous because I become so involved with them that I don't realize my legs have gone numb from elbow pressure-but then I read for a few more minutes while the pins and needes phase passes. :crapper reader smiley: :D

Queen Bruin
04-05-2005, 11:13 PM
I confess to being a reader as well. That's where all my Sierra magazines go when they get here. Also female, FTR.

davmilasav
04-05-2005, 11:18 PM
I have a whole set of the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader books. http://www.bathroomreader.com/home.html Articles are indexed as short, medium and long and include a wide range of topics.

They're also great to take along to the auto shop, the dentist or anywhere else that the provided reading material is older than you are.

Czarcasm
04-05-2005, 11:21 PM
Moving this from IMHO to the bathroom...er, I mean Cafe Society.

Grrr!
04-05-2005, 11:45 PM
I don't get you reader folks. Unless I've got the runs I'm never on the can long enough to read anything other than maybe just a short paragraph.

So what do you do if you're half way through the article and you've already finished taking a dump?

Do you stop mid article and get off the pot?

Or..

Do you stay on your throne untill you have finished the article?

If the latter is true; when do you wipe? before or after the article is done?

Inquiering minds want to know...

Khadro
04-06-2005, 12:26 AM
Not only am I a reader... I converted my wife as well. At frst she was horrified that I would read while I was "doing my business", but after not too long, we had in fact installed a magazine rack on the back of the toilet door!

And now, I have trouble finding room for my reading material amongst all those weird wimmin's magazines that are stacked there.

She has not progressed to the point of reading a book yet, but a magazine is fair game. For myself, I refuse to take non-fiction.

Yookeroo
04-06-2005, 12:33 AM
Of course I do! There's no TV or computer in there.

Laptop + TiVo2Go

levdrakon
04-06-2005, 02:57 AM
Laptops & wireless networks are great. I'm on the can right now!

Jervoise
04-06-2005, 03:57 AM
Like Daithi Lacha, I'll read the toilet paper wrapping or air freshener can if there's nothing else to look at. At work, I used to bring in my iPod to scroll through or an A5-sized magazine (so I could hide it in my suit pockets) to read.

At home, I bring in the newspaper or a magazine. I also have back-up reading in case there's no newspaper around: a book of 1000+ historical photographs with commentary on each. This volume has resided in the loo for over a year; I read through four or five photos each sitting...

seosamh
04-06-2005, 06:20 AM
My current bog reading material is a vast Cinema and TV Film Guide, where each of the 20,000 films has a review of about 200 words. Ideal for browsing: you can simply finish reading the last review and pick up where you left off next time.

NutMagnet
04-06-2005, 07:14 AM
Laptops & wireless networks are great. I'm on the can right now!
Please tell us you're not masturbating like a motherfuck.

BrotherCadfael
04-06-2005, 07:57 AM
The classic response to a poor theater review: "Dear sir: I am sitting in the smallest room in the house with your review in front of me. Soon, it will be behind me. Sincerely..."

Quartz
04-06-2005, 02:44 PM
I read in the bath.

lawoot
04-06-2005, 02:53 PM
Another bathroom reader here - and a bedroom reader, an at-work reader, a... Hell, I'll read ANYWHERE (even >GASP!< in the car - but only when I'm stuck in a slow drive thru line - and I CAN'T read when I'm a PASSENGER - I get carsick. I hate the wasted time being a passenger).

I mentioned this to a young fella I work with, and he looked at me as if I had just said that I eat my own excreta as well. I assumed it was pretty widespread (no pun intended), but I guess not...

He may have been shocked that you actually admitted that you READ. MANY people don't read recreationally (their loss).

Sampiro
04-06-2005, 02:56 PM
I have a whole set of the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader books. http://www.bathroomreader.com/home.html Articles are indexed as short, medium and long and include a wide range of topics.

I wholeheartedly recommend these as part of any basic KICO ("Knowledge In, Corn-kernels Out") plan. Equally great, but not as plentiful (there are only three) are the Great American Bathroom Books (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1880184044/qid=1112817281/sr=8-1/ref=pd_csp_1/103-4154039-6538246?v=glance&s=books&n=507846)- they give two page synopses of books from ancient texts (Gilgamesh, Illiad, etc.) to classics (David Copperfield, To Kill a Mockingbird) to self help (Tony Robbins, Dr. Laura Schitslinger) to pulp fiction (Grisham, Clancy) etc.. They're great for letting you know which books you'd like to read full text sometime when you're more constipated.

Hal Briston
04-06-2005, 03:26 PM
At any given time, I have four books going at once -- one for reading when lounging at home, one in the car for when I find I'm somewhere that requires any kind of wait, one at work for when I have free time, and yes, one in the bathroom.

I keep my "home" and "bathroom" books seperate, 'cause sometimes...ya know...you gotta go right now, and I don't want to take to time to find my "home" book when that happens.

Mauvaise
04-06-2005, 04:22 PM
I keep a little hand held electronic Yahtzee game on the back of the toilet. The time it takes for a game or two usually works out about perfect.

Daithi Lacha
04-06-2005, 08:40 PM
I don't get you reader folks. Unless I've got the runs I'm never on the can long enough to read anything other than maybe just a short paragraph.

So what do you do if you're half way through the article and you've already finished taking a dump?

Do you stop mid article and get off the pot?

Or..

Do you stay on your throne untill you have finished the article?

If the latter is true; when do you wipe? before or after the article is done?

Inquiering minds want to know...
Well, see, that's the thing. And this IS TMI: I take a long time. Sometimes, a real long time.
I'll start a BM, and mid-shove, it just stops. And so, there I sit, with nothing but time on my hands. Unless, of course, I have a good book. Fiction, non-fiction, biographies, short stories, poetry... hell, I don't care. It's all grist for the mill. And when I'm done, I attend to my business and the book goes back on the tank, 'til next time.
Used to read in the bath too, but after ruining a couple of paperbacks I stopped. Too much respect for my many-paged friends.
And don't get me started on Gameboy...

Scott Plaid
04-06-2005, 10:31 PM
I am not ashamed to admit I read on the throne.

Superdude
04-06-2005, 10:58 PM
Like Daithi Lacha, I'll read the toilet paper wrapping or air freshener can if there's nothing else to look at.

The back of a toothpaste tube, here.

Revtim
04-06-2005, 11:31 PM
I'm nuts; I constantly must have words in front of me. I often pick up a magazine and read when I *pee*. It's only a few sentences, but I do it anyway.

I can't believe that's butter!
04-07-2005, 12:25 AM
Oh, yes. I've converted the bulk of my towel cabinet into a bookshelf. Mainly magazines and 000-type material reside there, such as Rolling Stone's Rock and Roll Encyclopedia. I also have a farmer's almanac hanging on a nail in there.

I've also been known to take the practice pad in there and perfect my flamadiddles (and any other rudiment needing perfecting, i.e., all of them). It sounds nice in there, as well.

I guess looking in the bathroom for a book when I need to look up information is a sign of something...

levdrakon
04-07-2005, 04:20 AM
Please tell us you're not masturbating like a motherfuck.

I go through more laptops that way.


Nah, actually, I'm not a bathroom reader, unless it's a public toilet and I'm reading the poetry, invitations for sex, the comments of people reading the invitations for sex, and the comments about the comments of people reading the invitations for sex. And little drawings of Kilroy.

Nope, don't read in the toidy. Some of you people have mentioned how long some of your reading material has been in there. Haven't you read any of Cecil's columns about the germs that accumulate on that stuff?

ReadMore
04-07-2005, 05:41 AM
Just a ditto for Sampiro's mention of the "The Great American Bathroom Books". Gotta love 'em.

Readmore

Telperien
04-07-2005, 05:47 AM
I would never actually leave my reading material in the bathroom, but I do like to read there. Farging roommates, though. I can't read in the bathroom unless they're gone. Invariably someone will have to come into the bathroom for one reason or another, and then..."Harimad-sol, you're not reading in there, are you?" This started when one of the girls saw me exit the bathroom with a book.

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