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TLDRIDKJKLOLFTW
07-03-2007, 01:47 PM
I was talking about adages and was laughing at that one, but then I realized that I don't know a quaint or antiquated version of it...what's the "a stitch in time saves nine"-style adage that means "don't shit where you eat?"

Zeldar
07-03-2007, 02:11 PM
The version I seem to remember, though poorly perhaps, is "Don't get your meat where you get your potatoes." or something like that. Maybe somebody has a better version.

Moriarty
07-03-2007, 02:13 PM
Don't dip your pen in company ink

Eureka
07-03-2007, 02:15 PM
Don't soil your own nest?

Qadgop the Mercotan
07-03-2007, 02:36 PM
Don't pooh where you stew?

Don't defecate where you consumate?

Don't stool where you drool?

Ok, I got nothing.

But I too look forward to more answers on this one.

Smitty
07-03-2007, 03:09 PM
Don't get your sugar and your bread at the same store.

essell
07-03-2007, 03:25 PM
Don't shit on your own doorstep.

Or Don't poop on your own doorstep if you want it polite. :cool:

CynicalGabe
07-03-2007, 03:30 PM
Don't defecate where you masticate.

Scarlett67
07-03-2007, 03:47 PM
Don't get your meat where you get your bread.

Don't get your honey where you get your money.

lieu
07-03-2007, 03:54 PM
Don't grunt where you hunt?

Yllaria
07-03-2007, 03:58 PM
And here I always thought it was ". . . in your mess kit."

stolichnaya
07-03-2007, 03:58 PM
Don't grunt where you hunt?

Don't lather where you gather.

Actually, the pen in ink is probably where you're going.

My old boss at the golf course had a charming saying for this:

"Don't fuck the help."

Zabali_Clawbane
07-03-2007, 04:05 PM
People shouldn't throw stones if they live in a glass house? That's a similar sentiment, but not quite right I think. There is an older version of the sentiment, but I'm not bringing it up yet.

Liberal
07-03-2007, 04:08 PM
Don't soil your own nest?I think the Southern version is Don't mess in your nest.

SailedTheOceanBlue
07-03-2007, 04:13 PM
Don't fish off the company pier.

Billdo
07-03-2007, 04:14 PM
My old boss at the golf course had a charming saying for this:

"Don't fuck the help."
I'm having trouble picking up the metaphor in that one. Could you explain it? ;)

Morgenstern
07-03-2007, 04:53 PM
Control the Hobbit
Or meet Ms. Bobbitt

Dr. Drake
07-03-2007, 05:03 PM
"It's a dirty bird [indeed] that fouls its own nest." There are a lot of versions of this one in a number of different languages.

Though I wouldn't be surprised if "don't shit where you eat" is quite old.

Zabali_Clawbane
07-03-2007, 05:04 PM
"It's a dirty bird [indeed] that fouls its own nest." There are a lot of versions of this one in a number of different languages.

Though I wouldn't be surprised if "don't shit where you eat" is quite old.


I think that's the one I was trying to bring up, or close to it.

stolichnaya
07-03-2007, 05:07 PM
I think that's the one I was trying to bring up, or close to it.

"Don't bring up what you're close to."

AskNott
07-04-2007, 01:15 PM
My evil dad said, "Keep your dick out of the till." Not very polite, though.

samclem
07-04-2007, 03:20 PM
"It's a dirty bird [indeed] that fouls its own nest." There are a lot of versions of this one in a number of different languages.

Though I wouldn't be surprised if "don't shit where you eat" is quite old. I asked the good folks over at the American Dialect Society for some help on this one. So far the best reply found the "don't shit where you eat" from 1953(Saul Bellow). He also found a cite from 1937 which offered "...be sick in one's own hat." And the poster offered that he wouldn't be surprised to see it originate in the birds/nest.

samclem
07-04-2007, 03:28 PM
And, by using Google Book search, the "dirty bird/nest/fouls" is found in the works of Thomas Chandler Halliburton." 1830's.

Dr. Drake
07-04-2007, 03:59 PM
George Alsop, A Character of the Province of Maryland (1666) "For its an ill Bird will befoule her own Nest." This is its first American citation (from Early American Proverbs and Proverbial Phrases). There are several others from the 17th through 19th centuries. "Shit" is in the index, but nothing like the OP's proverb is attested. (I am rather fond of "Claw a Churl by the breech and he will shit in your fist" [1674], which they compare to "Whistle to a Jade and he will pay you with a fart," same source.)

jayjay
07-04-2007, 04:13 PM
My evil dad said, "Keep your dick out of the till." Not very polite, though.

That's the one I was going to post...

Dr. Drake
07-04-2007, 04:15 PM
Further, according to John G. Kunstmann in "The Bird That Fouls Its Nest":

"the proverb 'It is an ill bird that fouls its own nest,' was first recorded in complete form in Latin by Egbert von Lüttich in verse 148 of his Fecunda Ratis. There it reads: nidos commaculans immundus habebitur ales.... circa 1023 A.D." (Southern Folklore Quarterly 3 (1939), p. 75)

Several of the proverbs quoted use "shit" words: 12th century, Progenies avium mala foedat stercore nidum. (same source). Modern versions in many languages also have 'shit' words in the proverb. Incidentally, Kunstmann suggests that the bird that befouls its own nest is the hoopoe.

jayjay
07-04-2007, 04:25 PM
Incidentally, Kunstmann suggests that the bird that befouls its own nest is the hoopoe.

No, no. It's the gannet.

BarnOwl
07-04-2007, 10:32 PM
Don't dump where you hump.

Dr_Paprika
07-05-2007, 12:15 AM
Don't bite the hand that feeds you.
Then crap it out later.

Colibri
07-05-2007, 12:40 AM
Incidentally, Kunstmann suggests that the bird that befouls its own nest is the hoopoe.

The Hoopoe (http://www.kenyabirds.org.uk/pics/hoopoe-a.jpg) Upupa epops is notorious for the foulness of its nesting habits.

From here (http://www.nwf.org/internationalwildlife/dspPlainText.cfm?articleId=14)

Hoopoes are renowned for their stench during the nesting season, a characteristic that has earned them the moniker "stink cock" in Germany. The odor arises from an accumulation of feces in the nest combined with the foul-smelling secretion the bird emits from a preen gland at the base of its tail to deter predators. Hoopoe chicks defend themselves in the nest by hissing at intruders, then squirting liquid feces from their raised cloacae, striking unsuspecting trespassers in the face with remarkable aim. Few predators stick around for more, making the bird's defense mechanism surprisingly effective.

AskNott
07-05-2007, 07:29 PM
"Employees must wash hands before returning to work." That one usually keeps the shit out of the food.

TheLoadedDog
07-05-2007, 07:40 PM
One which doesn't exactly fit, but this reminded me is, "You don't stand outside the tent and piss in."

cookeze
07-05-2007, 11:31 PM
Polite? "Be careful how you make your bed---you're going to have to sleep in it."

jayjay
07-05-2007, 11:37 PM
Don't piss in the well. You're going to get thirsty eventually.

Leaper
07-05-2007, 11:44 PM
"Don't bite the hand that feeds you" is somewhat close.

Cagey Drifter
07-06-2007, 09:39 AM
Lather, rinse, repeat.

KneadToKnow
07-06-2007, 10:11 AM
I am, with all due respect to everyone, utterly astounded at the number of posters so far who don't seem to grasp the situation described by the OP's phrase. "Don't fuck the help" is the dead-on.

The politest version is Laura Holt's from the 1st season intro to Remington Steele: "Don't mix business with pleasure."

Dr. Drake
07-06-2007, 11:56 AM
I am, with all due respect to everyone, utterly astounded at the number of posters so far who don't seem to grasp the situation described by the OP's phrase. "Don't fuck the help" is the dead-on....This is a really good point, as I usually hear the proverb used to mean "do not sleep with your co-workers" rather than "keep your kitchen tidy." So, metaphorically:

Do not shit (= fuck)
where you eat (= work).

I still maintain that it derives from the "dirty bird" proverb, but you can tell a lot about our culture's attitudes toward life by the metaphorical equivalents expressed in the current version.

samclem
07-06-2007, 12:35 PM
I still maintain that it derives from the "dirty bird" proverb, but you can tell a lot about our culture's attitudes toward life by the metaphorical equivalents expressed in the current version. There's little doubt that you're right about it's origin. I was most impressed by your scholarship in your earlier presentation.

AskNott
07-06-2007, 12:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KneadToKnow
I am, with all due respect to everyone, utterly astounded at the number of posters so far who don't seem to grasp the situation described by the OP's phrase. "Don't fuck the help" is the dead-on....

This is a really good point, as I usually hear the proverb used to mean "do not sleep with your co-workers" rather than "keep your kitchen tidy." So, metaphorically:

Do not shit (= fuck)
where you eat (= work).

I still maintain that it derives from the "dirty bird" proverb, but you can tell a lot about our culture's attitudes toward life by the metaphorical equivalents expressed in the current version.
With all due respect to Knead To Know and Dr. Drake, several of the posters who strayed from the "keep your dick out of the till" model were aiming at humor, after the OP had been adequately answered. On the other hand, "don't shit where you eat" doesn't easily translate to "don't fuck the help," unless you're into coprophilia. In several works of fiction, DSWYE means "don't swindle your co-workers," "don't steal from your own family," and "don't be vicious toward your relatives."

"Do not shit (= fuck)"?? Maybe you fuck that way, mon ami. Not that there's anything wrong with that... ;)

Siam Sam
07-06-2007, 12:58 PM
I've always heard it "Don't piss in your pool."

Dr. Drake
07-06-2007, 05:34 PM
With all due respect to Knead To Know and Dr. Drake, several of the posters who strayed from the "keep your dick out of the till" model were aiming at humor, after the OP had been adequately answered. On the other hand, "don't shit where you eat" doesn't easily translate to "don't fuck the help," unless you're into coprophilia. In several works of fiction, DSWYE means "don't swindle your co-workers," "don't steal from your own family," and "don't be vicious toward your relatives."

"Do not shit (= fuck)"?? Maybe you fuck that way, mon ami. Not that there's anything wrong with that... ;)I can recall a situation in the mid-1990s in Southern California where the proverb was used to castigate a pair of co-workers whose relationship was causing problems at work. In other words, it's not an interpretation I'm pushing, it's one I have observed. It doesn't have to be the original one, the main one, or the only one, just one that's out there.

Siam Sam
07-06-2007, 10:17 PM
I can recall a situation in the mid-1990s in Southern California where the proverb was used to castigate a pair of co-workers whose relationship was causing problems at work. In other words, it's not an interpretation I'm pushing, it's one I have observed. It doesn't have to be the original one, the main one, or the only one, just one that's out there.
Yes, over here, "Don't piss in your pool" is always used to admonish someone not to sleep with (A) the maid and (B) the employees. I've not heard it used for any other situation.

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