View Full Version : Obama v. Team Hillary and McCain

Two and a Half Inches of Fun
02-20-2008, 07:27 PM
It is my position that Obama could take both Hillary and McCain in a no holds barred rumble to the death. I think his optimal strategy would depend on how Hillary and McCain choose to attack. If they both come at him next to each other he should kick McCain hard in the gut. McCain is an old man who has a lot of old injuries due to being a POW. A good solid kick from a man in the condition of Obama should take him out. (He could also go for the groin.) Obama should then just beat the shit out of Clinton. He is a fairly big man and as a woman Clinton will not have the upper body strength to deal with this assault. Once he has her down as well he should kick both of them in the head repeatedly and then choke them to death one at a time. If they choose to circle Obama, he should rush Hillary drving her back. He should drive her back as far as possible. McCain cannot move fast and the distance will allow Obama to deliver some crushing blows to Hillary. Once he has her down, he could take out McCain with ease. The best strategy for Hillary and McCain would be to approach Obama with McCain in front and Hillary directly behind. McCain will have to take a shot from Obama while Hillary goes for a knockout groin shot. If she misses it is over. Obama will take them out. If she connects they might have a chance, but McCain will have to recover quickly from the blow that Obama delivered. I just have no confidence in a team that depends on the recovery ability of an old man that has POW injuries. Obama will take them out. McCain is just too much of a weak link. Now, if it was two Hillarys, Obama would have a serious problem.

02-20-2008, 09:17 PM
I wouldn't count McCain out, you just know he still has a home-made shiv from the Hanoi Hilton stuck up his ass "just in case."

02-20-2008, 10:40 PM
Obama is more than 6 inches taller than McCain and 5 inches taller than Hillary. I'm Hillary's height (5' 8") and I've fought guys Barack's height (6' 1.5") and the biggest advantage is the REACH.

Clearly Barack Obama could win in a fight, especially if it took place in a cartoon. He'd just need to hold them both at arms' length and let them tire themselves out.

02-20-2008, 10:42 PM
Batman could take on all three of them and still have time for both Mike Huckabee AND Chuck Norris.

If he's prepared.