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-   -   Finish my sentence, and start a new one! (https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=857802)

Spoons 07-04-2018 12:08 AM

... it didn't turn out well.

I had to put on a sweater because ...

snfaulkner 07-04-2018 12:12 AM

...I needed to hide the bloodstain on my shirt from the murdered hobo.

The downward spiral began when...

Elendil's Heir 07-04-2018 12:26 AM

I attributed naughty words to Cecil Adams in this thread.

I never curse, myself; instead, I ______________

Beckdawrek 07-04-2018 12:31 AM

^^^^called my attorney, I am charged with lewd acts, again.


When I get off the phone_________.

Ambivalid 07-04-2018 12:31 AM

Internalize and suppress.

The worst actor in the history of the world HAS to be...


ETA: Simulpost with Beck

snfaulkner 07-04-2018 02:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek (Post 21063165)
^^^^called my attorney, I am charged with lewd acts, again.


When I get off the phone_________.

I curse the name of who called me, break down in tears, turn the music back up, and open a beer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ambivalid (Post 21063167)
Internalize and suppress.

The worst actor in the history of the world HAS to be...


ETA: Simulpost with Beck

Charlemagne, because how often to I get to say charlemagne?

The last time Charlemagne was brought up...

Spoons 07-04-2018 02:22 AM

... I was asleep in history class, and failed the test.

Now, I was awake for Henry VIII, and ...

Beckdawrek 07-04-2018 03:11 AM

^^^^^^the big divorce.



On my way to the chopping block________.

Spoons 07-04-2018 03:21 AM

... my trusty steed and henchmen appeared, defeated the king's guardsmen, and we made our escape.

One day, at archery practice, Little John said, ...

Beckdawrek 07-04-2018 03:59 AM

Where's Robin Hood and Friar Tuck?



Back in Sherwood forest.....

Spoons 07-04-2018 04:02 AM

... Friar Tuck got into the wine--again.

Robin solved the problem by ...

Beckdawrek 07-04-2018 04:22 AM

putting the Friar in AA.


Maid Marion was very_________.

Aquadementia 07-04-2018 05:17 AM

... unfair, by always taking Robin's side.

The Sheriff pointed a dagger at Marion and threatened...

Spoons 07-04-2018 05:42 AM

... to cut her hair.

Maid Marian responded by saying ...

Elendil's Heir 07-04-2018 10:24 AM

"You're not my stylist, darling, and I have no respect for your technique, so back off!"

Visits to Sherwood Forest inevitably ___________________

gkster 07-04-2018 12:25 PM

end in drunkenness, theft, fighting, or fleeing from the Sheriff of Nottingham.

Why anyone ever visits Sherwood Forest __________

snfaulkner 07-04-2018 05:12 PM

...when they can just watch Kevin Costner in Robin Hood over and over is beyond me.

A journey to the beyond...

Alpha Twit 07-04-2018 05:20 PM

sounds like too much work.

A journey to the buffet....

Spoons 07-04-2018 07:14 PM

... would be nice, since I don't feel like cooking tonight.

When hiking in the woods, it is important to ...

Elendil's Heir 07-04-2018 08:10 PM

avoid taunting bears; they really don't like that.

Taunting bears will almost certainly get you _____________

snfaulkner 07-04-2018 08:19 PM

...the secret green gem you need to cross through the portal on level 7.

Level 7 is a bitch because...

Patx2 07-04-2018 08:22 PM

there are bears taunting you at every turn.

If you accidentally drop the green gem...

Aquadementia 07-04-2018 09:21 PM

... put the game on pause while your gem insurance claim is processed in the next three to eight weeks.

In the mean time you can amuse yourself with a ball and stick by...

Beckdawrek 07-04-2018 09:48 PM

Playing the game fairly.




After I get a homerun_________.

snfaulkner 07-04-2018 10:00 PM

...I am arrested for lewd acts.

An inside the park homerun is slang for...

Spoons 07-05-2018 12:25 AM

... something you'd never say in front of Grandmother.

Potato chips are a great snack, but ...

Beckdawrek 07-05-2018 12:28 AM

too salty.


The salty old sailor__________.

Thin Ice 07-05-2018 07:46 AM

walked up to an old mate at the bar and said, "Long time no sea."

The last time I shipped out ___________

Cardigan 07-05-2018 07:56 AM

...I got thrown in the brig for lewd acts.


I wish I was in the land of cotton.....

Knowed Out 07-05-2018 08:13 AM

because the lands of rayon and polyester are no longer in fashion.

For Independence Day, I shot off a...

Elendil's Heir 07-05-2018 10:04 AM

harshly-worded letter to the White House.

I don't why I even bother writing those anymore; ______________________________

snfaulkner 07-05-2018 06:46 PM

I never learned to write and the president never learned to read.

At the time of his death...

Elendil's Heir 07-05-2018 08:50 PM

my great-grandfather Jacob was so old that he farted dust.

On the other hand, my great-grandmother Eunice _______________

snfaulkner 07-05-2018 09:00 PM

...died of dysentery on the Oregon trail.

The bodies were found...

Beckdawrek 07-05-2018 10:37 PM

Half eaten, they were a party of Donners you know.



When I prepared dinner________.

snfaulkner 07-05-2018 10:51 PM

nobody ate the splayed hobo scrotums.

Step number 7 is to...

boson 07-06-2018 01:09 AM

…is to try to hide the shock on your face.

When I stutter though an explanation…

snfaulkner 07-06-2018 01:20 AM

...it means The Voices are loudest in my head.

If you inject a t-rex egg full of crack...

Beckdawrek 07-06-2018 01:26 AM

You fly to heaven (or hell).


In my afterlife I discovered_________.

Spoons 07-06-2018 01:59 AM

... that it was a lot different than Sunday school had led me to believe.

While driving home from work today, I saw ...

Beckdawrek 07-06-2018 02:20 AM

A hitchhiker from way down south, with a sign saying: "can y'all give a gal a ride?"



When I got in the car_____________.

Ambivalid 07-06-2018 02:20 AM

A man kiss another man.


Don't you eat that yellow______.



ETA: Dammmit. AGAIN Beck! :)

Beckdawrek 07-06-2018 02:26 AM

Flower.


Sorry, Ambivalid, I am as quick as a_____.

Spoons 07-06-2018 03:12 AM

... race car with a nitro boost.

Speaking of racing, I once saw a racehorse ...

Cardigan 07-06-2018 08:06 AM

....take his sweet time peeing.


I always bet on the horse that......

Knowed Out 07-06-2018 09:38 AM

is the least hung. Less air resistance.

A horse is a horse of course unless...

Patx2 07-06-2018 11:31 AM

itís not.

The last time I had pizza...

Beckdawrek 07-06-2018 04:49 PM

Was in a Mexican eatery.



On the pizza was___________.

Elendil's Heir 07-06-2018 07:17 PM

a bunch of red peppers, some ground beef and about thirty miniature sombreros made of shredded cheese.

It wasn't what we'd ordered, so of course we told the waiter _______________

Ambivalid 07-06-2018 07:22 PM

We hoped he died a slow, torturous death.

Online nudes of Hillary Clinton have been______.


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