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-   -   Technology doesn't work that way - SamuelA's Pit Thread (https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=843654)

Sunny Daze 12-02-2017 06:52 PM

Technology doesn't work that way - SamuelA's Pit Thread
 
It has been noted on occasion that SamuelA has something of an obsession with technology, particularly nanotechnology. He has an interest in cryonics. He also gets belligerent if anyone questions him on the validity of any of his optimistic claims. See, things don't always work the way that SamuelA thinks they do.

Here's an example of Sammy-boy wandering into la-la land because he got questioned by another poster:

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamuelA (Post 20638163)
Fuck you. You're the crackpot who equates nanotechnology with Faster than Light Travel and fucking antigravity.

I bet you work at Home Depot...you certainly don't have the education to do anything better. If you have an office job, you're one of those morons who maintains a fucking spreadsheet of contacts and wastes all my god-damn time at stupid meetings.

The difference between nanotechnology and FTL/antigravity is that the first technology is in the godamn hands and eyes you are using to type like a monkey on your god-damn keyboard. What do you think your fucking cells are made of, you imbecile! Individual fucking molecular chains put together one peptide at a godamn time, after being made one fucking molecule at a time in biological synthesis paths. But I bet you didn't fucking know that.

Nobody has ever, in all of humanity, found a way to even reduce gravity's pull that passed peer review. And fucking FTL travel means time travel which means paradoxes which means it is almost certainly fucking impossible. Fuck you, moron.

And as for your suggestion : normally, no. But if you were dying of cancer with a month left to live and it's the wintertime, the only fucking way you're going to even have a chance of seeing anything but nothing at all forever and and ever is if you get your moronic brain frozen and hope the future has enough pity on your to resurrect you. You're goddamn right the odds are slim, but they aren't fucking zero, so yeah, if you wanna see a green lawn again that's the only way it could ever happen, no matter how slim the odds are.

He also can't stop shitting all over another thread. Solution: he gets his very own shiny thread.

Welcome to your Pit thread SamuelA.

Morgenstern 12-02-2017 06:53 PM

He won't be here, he's looking for the ignore function.

Sunny Daze 12-02-2017 06:56 PM

Yes, but that's actual technology.

EinsteinsHund 12-02-2017 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunny Daze (Post 20639590)
Yes, but that's actual technology.

HIGH technology, I tells ya. Not anybody can handle that so fast.

Nawth Chucka 12-02-2017 07:54 PM

From what I've observed, he'll posit something, fail to back it up and then go to extraordinary lengths to avoid using the phrase, 'I was wrong.' Maybe I'm biased, but his calling Tripler pretentious shows a lack of understanding to a great degree.
And the classist remark about Home Depot employees - that's some straight up bullshit I'd expect from someone not secure in their own field.

Mr. Nylock 12-02-2017 07:57 PM

The most clearly ignorant poster I have interacted with in a very long time. I don't like to shit on people, but the brief interactions I have had with this poster have lead me to no other conclusion.

Other than obvious trolls (I don't believe this poster is a troll), the last time I can remember a poster like him was someone who kept insisting that bicycle helmets actually made one less safe and kept backing it up by providing links to scientific studies and bicycle advocacy groups that clearly stated that helmets should always be worn. He was convinced, however, despite what his own cites were saying about the safety of helmets, that it was all big conspiracy by bicycle helmet manufacturers to make money.

And I'm one of the dumbest people to ever post with any regularity on these boards so that's saying something.

Darren Garrison 12-02-2017 08:07 PM

So that it doesn't get overlooked among all of SamuelA's technology ideas, I will point out his first post in the OTRS thread, which includes

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamuelA
Unfortunately, for whatever reason, most smart kids are white or asian. Maybe it isn't genetics and maybe black people can perform in the right 1% of the bell curve...but they are vanishingly rare.


Sunny Daze 12-02-2017 08:28 PM

Yes, I forgot that bit. He's stupid and racist. What a charming package.

Nawth Chucka 12-02-2017 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darren Garrison (Post 20639699)
So that it doesn't get overlooked among all of SamuelA's technology ideas, I will point out his first post in the OTRS thread, which includes

What the fucking what? Racism is the icing on this shitcake.

Darren Garrison 12-02-2017 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunny Daze (Post 20639734)
Yes, I forgot that bit. He's stupid and racist. What a charming package.

Which brings up a point--whenever he is talking about Artificial Intelligence, does he really mean Artificial White Intelligence?

EinsteinsHund 12-02-2017 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darren Garrison (Post 20639745)
Which brings up a point--whenever he is talking about Artificial Intelligence, does he really mean Artificial White Intelligence?

[sarcasm]Black AI would be...a step forward, but not the real thing, don't you think?[/s]

LSLGuy 12-02-2017 09:24 PM

The kid's still in college. Hell, he might even be a precocious high schooler, though I doubt that.

Yeah, he's got some really bad social skillz. And self-reported weight, body image, and food addiction problems. If he can learn to learn from the various grown-ups he might grow up to be worthwhile. If not; not.

We shall see. I honestly can't say whether I handicap this one optimistic or pessimistic. Yoda had some sage comment about "too close to call". Damn if I can remember what it was, but that's how I feel today on the topic. "Confused I am; uncertain the future is. Whether Jedi's food or Jedi SamuelA will one day be cannot say I."

Morgenstern 12-02-2017 10:22 PM

He should check out Scientology. I hear they can audit that shit right out of you for about 200 grand.

Chronos 12-02-2017 10:37 PM

Wait... So he knows that nanotechnology is basically just biology, and he still thinks that it's that magical? Dude, I hate to break it to you, but we already have biology, and have had it for billions of years, and it hasn't brought the marvels you describe yet. Maybe it will, eventually, but I don't want to wait billions more years to see it, if you get what I mean.

Ethilrist 12-02-2017 11:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LSLGuy (Post 20639818)
The kid's still in college. Hell, he might even be a precocious high schooler, though I doubt that.

Yeah, he's got some really bad social skillz. And self-reported weight, body image, and food addiction problems. If he can learn to learn from the various grown-ups he might grow up to be worthwhile. If not; not.

We shall see. I honestly can't say whether I handicap this one optimistic or pessimistic. Yoda had some sage comment about "too close to call". Damn if I can remember what it was, but that's how I feel today on the topic. "Confused I am; uncertain the future is. Whether Jedi's food or Jedi SamuelA will one day be cannot say I."

"Difficult to see. Always in motion is the future."

One of my favorite Yoda quotes.

AI Proofreader 12-02-2017 11:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EinsteinsHund (Post 20639781)
[sarcasm]Black AI would be...a step forward, but not the real thing, don't you think?[/s]

When they come up with genuine A.I., they absolutely have to allow us to interface with it while it uses the voices of people such as Samuel Jackson:

How did these motherfucking worms get in this motherfucking mainframe!

Or Immortal Technique, if you want less comedy and more a rap version of Noam Chomsky.

Mr. Nylock 12-02-2017 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LSLGuy (Post 20639818)

Yeah, he's got some really bad social skillz. And self-reported weight, body image, and food addiction problems. If he can learn to learn from the various grown-ups he might grow up to be worthwhile. If not; not.

I always admire people for trying not to judge people too quickly and also take in the context of a whole person, but SamuelA is very aggressive in his behavior and very quick to hurl all sorts of insults and cast disparaging remarks at other people.

I'm actually getting very tired of people labeling everything as bad social skills with the implication that the problem is that someone is just awkward and doesn't pick up on social nuances. Those people deserve sympathy and understanding, aggressive assholes ready to tear into other people do not. And I don't really care about what other issues he has, most people have issues - people with more abusive personality types just use these various things to try to get a pass for their behavior.

LSLGuy 12-03-2017 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ethilrist (Post 20639929)
"Difficult to see. Always in motion is the future."

One of my favorite Yoda quotes.

Thank you. I've written it down.



Quote:

Originally Posted by AI Proofreader (Post 20639948)
When they come up with genuine A.I., they absolutely have to allow us to interface with it while it uses the voices of people such as Samuel Jackson:

How did these motherfucking worms get in this motherfucking mainframe!
...

I think the master AI ought to have Mr. T's voice:
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. T
I pity da foo who defies me. Die meatbags!!

That'll give the first (and last) Human / AI war the appropriate kind of narration.



Quote:

Originally Posted by Mr. Nylock (Post 20639972)
...
but SamuelA is very aggressive in his behavior and very quick to hurl all sorts of insults and cast disparaging remarks at other people.
...
And I don't really care about what other issues he has, most people have issues - people with more abusive personality types just use these various things to try to get a pass for their behavior.

Agree. I'm not trying to give the kid (much of) a pass.

What I meant at the end was If he learns, and learns quickly, he'll be OK to have around. If he can't or won't, he'll be gone, and good riddance to the behavior. No skin off my nose either way.

And I agree that for the rest of us, there's no practical difference between can't or won't. Individually and collectively we're under no obligation to tolerate the handicapped just because they're handicapped. And we're definitely not obligated to tolerate jerks just because they enjoy acting like jerks.

As this thread amply demonstrates, he's on probation (at best) with a lot of the community members who matter. That's not a stable place for him to sit. Ask not for whom the clock is counting down; it counts down for SamuelA.

LSLGuy 12-03-2017 08:09 AM

I just found this post by SamuelA in the Omnibus troll thread: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...4#post20639854. Plus another below that.

These are not the acts of somebody intending to have a long career here. The clock ticks louder.

Morgenstern 12-03-2017 08:46 AM

IF anyone, anywhere, ever says LSLGuy is not a gentleman and a scholar, I will personally email them a picture of BigT with that Yoda quote printed on it.

Sunny Daze 12-03-2017 11:06 AM

I'm tempted to do it, just to get the picture. :D

LSLGuy 12-03-2017 11:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgenstern (Post 20640275)
IF anyone, anywhere, ever says LSLGuy is not a gentleman and a scholar, I will personally email them a picture of BigT with that Yoda quote printed on it.

Where's that blushing smilie when I need it? You are too kind, Sir.

Do you mean Mr. T or our very own BigT?

Then again they might be the same person. Have you ever seen them in the same place at the same time? I sure haven't. :)

madsircool 12-03-2017 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunny Daze (Post 20640516)
I'm tempted to do it, just to get the picture. :D

He looks like Chumlee from Pawn Stars.

Darren Garrison 12-03-2017 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgenstern (Post 20640275)
IF anyone, anywhere, ever says LSLGuy is not a gentleman and a scholar, I will personally email them a picture of BigT with that Yoda quote printed on it.

I'm thinking of a different Yoda photo (double-spoilered for strong adult content and possible triggering of a feeling of inadequacy.)

SPOILER:
SPOILER:
Link.

Helena330 12-03-2017 12:20 PM

SamuelA, you had some very good advice for me when I was looking for a used car. I really appreciated it. So I'm saying this kindly: You've got to dial it down. I know you can be a great poster, but sometimes you really go off the rails with anger and insults. When you get that pissed off, step back for a bit, or get away from the computer for a couple hours. I know you can do better.

zoid 12-03-2017 12:21 PM

The thing that irks me is that it's OK to be wrong if you have a bit of humility and can admit it, and you can get away with a bit of arrogance if you truly are a subject matter expert, but being consistently wrong AND arrogant is an insufferable combination.

LSLGuy 12-03-2017 12:40 PM

Now that's an excellent post + sig combo!

Dewey Finn 12-03-2017 12:48 PM

In this thread, he was absolutely convinced that it will soon be possible to scan a preserved human brain and then recover the personality and memories (the consciousness, in other words) and asked us what our excuse was. (He never did clarify why we needed to supply an excuse, or whether he was asking us why we're not lining up today to have our brains extracted for retrieval or why we're not throwing all our time and money at developing the technology.)

Morgenstern 12-03-2017 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dewey Finn (Post 20640746)
In this thread, he was absolutely convinced that it will soon be possible to scan a preserved human brain and then recover the personality and memories (the consciousness, in other words) and asked us what our excuse was. (He never did clarify why we needed to supply an excuse, or whether he was asking us why we're not lining up today to have our brains extracted for retrieval or why we're not throwing all our time and money at developing the technology.)

Seriously, that is L. Ron Hubbard shit right there. Thetan fantasy. Our friend is a Scientologist whether he knows it or not.

running coach 12-03-2017 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dewey Finn (Post 20640746)
In this thread, he was absolutely convinced that it will soon be possible to scan a preserved human brain and then recover the personality and memories (the consciousness, in other words) and asked us what our excuse was. (He never did clarify why we needed to supply an excuse, or whether he was asking us why we're not lining up today to have our brains extracted for retrieval or why we're not throwing all our time and money at developing the technology.)

You mean The Final Cut wasn't real?
Quote:

The film takes place in a setting where memory implants make it possible to record entire lives. (Robin) Williams plays a professional who specializes in editing the memories of unsavory people into uncritical memorials that are played at funerals.
;)

Darren Garrison 12-03-2017 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by running coach (Post 20640768)
You mean The Final Cut wasn't real?

I've seen that movie. It annoyed me. The editing deck wasn't just artificially intelligent--it was able to view all of the memories and observations of a person's lifetime, understand them, and index them by theme in a matter of minutes. That isn't just AI--that is Weakly Godlike intelligence orders of magnitude beyond human. If a Weakly Godlike AI is something desktop-portable and affordable by a modest freelance professional, then society would be changed in profound ways, and yet the world in the movie was almost exactly like the one we actually live in.

Razncain 12-03-2017 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dewey Finn (Post 20640746)
In this thread, he was absolutely convinced that it will soon be possible to scan a preserved human brain and then recover the personality and memories (the consciousness, in other words) and asked us what our excuse was. (He never did clarify why we needed to supply an excuse, or whether he was asking us why we're not lining up today to have our brains extracted for retrieval or why we're not throwing all our time and money at developing the technology.)

I often have long absences from SD, so that thread, I believe was my first or second encounter with diaper stain. That wasn't enough for me to dignify the ire that many were posting to him in the OTRU thread, but I certainly see why they are treating him that way, and also why he's been pitted here.

Rarely look at the OTRU thread, but did find it worthwhile to read the last few pages, Tripler's retort (#5044) was exceptionally brilliant. Interesting also to note is how he is crawfishing trying not to piss him off any further, but Tripler isn't having it. Since he doesn't seem to respect civility, his threads and posts should just stay in BBQ Pit, that way one can return in kind the same kind of assholery he often displays.

Oh well, I read where he is young, so if he can live long enough without having the shit kicked out of him, he might just learn something yet, and some of it might be how to have a civil discourse in other threads.

Lemur866 12-03-2017 06:06 PM

Every time I read one of his threads, I think of this old sketch, How To Do It:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNfGyIW7aHM

It's all so simple! To colonize the moon you just invent self-replicating factories, send one to the moon, and you're done. To solve immortality, you just invent a way to extract the complete personality, thoughts and memory from a frozen human brain, and you're done. To solve economics, just build solar panels everywhere, use the excess power to create methane which you store for later, and you're done. Now, do I even need to show you all how to cure cancer?

It's so simple, why am I even bothering to explain it? And yet they called me mad bacl at the Academy! Fools! I'll destroy them. I'll destroy them all.

running coach 12-03-2017 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darren Garrison (Post 20640839)
I've seen that movie. It annoyed me. The editing deck wasn't just artificially intelligent--it was able to view all of the memories and observations of a person's lifetime, understand them, and index them by theme in a matter of minutes. That isn't just AI--that is Weakly Godlike intelligence orders of magnitude beyond human. If a Weakly Godlike AI is something desktop-portable and affordable by a modest freelance professional, then society would be changed in profound ways, and yet the world in the movie was almost exactly like the one we actually live in.

I only saw it once. Is it possible the implants tagged the memories in real time and the editing deck just sorted through them?

Darren Garrison 12-03-2017 06:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by running coach (Post 20641284)
I only saw it once. Is it possible the implants tagged the memories in real time and the editing deck just sorted through them?

Maybe. But that isn't less bad. It wouldn't be a desktop device that can understand human feelings and interactions at thousands of times realtime, but it would be a chip small enough to implant and cheap enough to mass market that understands human feelings and interactions in real time and stores a lifetime worth of audio and video, which is still post-singularity level tech.

wolfpup 12-03-2017 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgenstern (Post 20640275)
IF anyone, anywhere, ever says LSLGuy is not a gentleman and a scholar, I will personally email them a picture of BigT with that Yoda quote printed on it.

I feel I would be remiss if I didn't take a moment to say that I concur with this. I consider LSLGuy to be among the most valuable members of this community, and his posts are invariably respectful, insightful, and informative.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemur866 (Post 20641264)
Every time I read one of his threads, I think of this old sketch, How To Do It:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNfGyIW7aHM

It's all so simple! To colonize the moon you just invent self-replicating factories, send one to the moon, and you're done. To solve immortality, you just invent a way to extract the complete personality, thoughts and memory from a frozen human brain, and you're done. To solve economics, just build solar panels everywhere, use the excess power to create methane which you store for later, and you're done. Now, do I even need to show you all how to cure cancer?

It's so simple, why am I even bothering to explain it? And yet they called me mad bacl at the Academy! Fools! I'll destroy them. I'll destroy them all.

Perfect! Throw in a Major Attitude Problem, and that sums up exactly why I find SamuelA so fucking annoying. But as I said to him in all sincerity in the Trolls R Us thread, we've had worse (although most of them are banned), so there may be hope for him yet if he can rapidly acquire some maturity and dial back the all-knowing obnoxiousness about 7000 degrees.

I haven't contributed to this thread because I pretty much said what I had to say back in the OTRS thread (#5041), and besides, as already noted, it was completely overshadowed by Tripler's masterful takedown in #5044 and later, but #5044 alone deserves some kind of plack. ;)

But since I'm here I'll just note my amusement at his claim that my criticism of his illiteracy was all over just a "minor typo", because "you can't argue with me on the points, so you hammer me because I missed a comma ...". And then the fuckwit had the audacity to claim:
I'm using tenet correctly in context. So which is it : I'm so illiterate I don't know the difference between a dude who lives in a rental property and a belief or principle, or I accidentally typed it wrong and spellcheck didn't warn me?
This after I did in fact criticize him on the points, notably his idiotic statement about capitalism and his racism, and more generally, I and many others have constantly hammered him on his useless oversimplifications of complex technologies and his cult-like belief in fantastical prognostications, as Lemur so succinctly summarized above.

And I would just note in passing, if only for my own entertainment, that he doesn't seem to know what a typo is. Writing "teh" instead of "the" is a typo. It means rapidly typing fingers got out of sync. Writing "their" instead of "they're" and similar mistakes with homographs can sometimes be just a mental slip, though sometimes an indicator of something more fundamental. But writing "tenant" instead of "tenet" in the same sentence that contains "per say" -- those are not typos. Those are indicators of ignorance. A normal person would admit the mistake and move on -- not really a huge deal in the larger scheme of things -- but not SamuelA. He has to "prove" that not only was it not a mistake, but it's his accuser who is mistaken.

Granted, those particular examples are very limited indicators of ignorance, but one makes assumptions, like one does when seeing a cockroach or two scurrying under the fridge when the light comes on. It may be just an unlikely happenstance, the entomological equivalent of a smart black person in SamuelA's racist world, but the smart money says that when you've seen two, the place is probably infested with them.

wolfpup 12-18-2017 01:38 PM

There was some discussion in this thread of whether SamuelA was likely to dial back his juvenile pomposity or continue to be a jerk and a pretentious laughingstock who was wrong about practically everything. Now we have the answer.

And that answer is: he's chosen to dial up the level of pretentious jerkness and take it to previously unimagined new heights. He got into an altercation with Stranger On A Train in this thread where the fucking douchebag's lack of knowledge gets him on the wrong side of the argument and smacked down for it, to which the ignorant fuck reacts with renewed arrogant pomposity: "I dismiss it cavalierly because I know what I'm talking about." Then he starts a whole new thread in GQ for the sole purpose of advertising the claim that he's right (he isn't) and that Stranger is wrong (he isn't).

The basis of his claim is the usual SamuelA douchebaggery. He thinks he understands something based on some simplistic idea he picked up in high school or thought up himself, so he's going to "prove" that Stranger -- who I understand works on rocket design for a living and has worked on studies of asteroid deflection -- doesn't understand how momentum works, but he, SamuelA, is going to set him straight, just like he sets everyone else straight, lifting them out of their poor abject ignorance when they disagree with him.

So he's now gone one better than the idea of threadshitting. SamuelA has invented the concept of forum-shitting, where he deposits his self-serving and incorrect bullshit like a giant steaming turd in the middle of GQ in order to prove how smart he is. Here's how he's doing so far:

- List of those who state that SamuelA is full of shit: Everyone. Including knowledgeable posters like Stranger On A Train and Francis Vaughan.

- List of those who agree with SamuelA: No one.

But he's still at it, apparently oblivious to making a complete ass of himself. This is actually now a kind of pathology, more than just a bloviating pompous jerk, this is more a symptom of someone afflicted by a genuinely diagnosable mental illness: a grossly distorted view of reality amplified by delusions of grandeur about his understanding of it.

I did previously address this in my humble understated way in the Omnibus thread where I made the case that SamuelA was a pompous ignorant douchebag, but Tripler pulled no punches in his masterful assessment of SamuelA that bears repeating:
I think you are a goddamned bloviated moron that speaks more out of an anal sphincter than any other orifice. I have argued with you on the points, but you deflected. I think you're so illiterate out of laziness. You, Sir, are the laziest bastard I have ever met.

You are a goddamned dogbreathed mother-(bless her soul for dealing with you)-loving fucktard. You make claims, provide a metric asston of bullshit, and provide absolutely zero proof. You grandstand from a position of opinion and not fact, and contribute nothing but wasted electrons to every online discussion you participate in.

I hadn't call you out as a troll in other threads because I could not determine if: A) you were just a fucking moron, and/or B) there was malice behind your opinions/posts for motive. I am now convinced you are a malicious, fucking moron (both A and B for your math, simplified for you).
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/...postcount=5044

LSLGuy 12-18-2017 02:00 PM

I have nothing to add. You called it. I was wrong. Kid's wacko. At this point I don't know what to do except laugh and point.

On present trends soon he'll have every engineer, scientist, and computer guru on the board on "ignore". I suppose then he can consider the SDMB his private blog where he 'splains things to the unwashed masses.

The fools. The ignorant fools! They'll all pay for mocking me. Me! ME!

At least Trump's schtick would be funny if he was still only in real estate. This stuff is tiresome from the first twit.

wolfpup 12-18-2017 02:23 PM

You weren't "wrong", you were making the generous assumption that SamuelA might possibly possess some fragments of knowledge about something that could possibly result in useful posts if he could learn to act like some semblance of a decent human being. Turns out, he can't, and if he does actually possess any knowledge about anything it is still not in evidence. Unless you want to colonize the galaxy with an army of autonomous self-replicating robots. That one he's got perfectly figured out, and no one can touch him on that! :D

Dewey Finn 12-18-2017 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemur866 (Post 20641264)
It's all so simple! To colonize the moon you just invent self-replicating factories, send one to the moon, and you're done. To solve immortality, you just invent a way to extract the complete personality, thoughts and memory from a frozen human brain, and you're done. To solve economics, just build solar panels everywhere, use the excess power to create methane which you store for later, and you're done. Now, do I even need to show you all how to cure cancer?

I just want to say that this paragraph perfectly encapsulates SamuelA's entire schtick.

wolfpup 12-18-2017 02:47 PM

I should also point out, in all fairness, that colonizing the galaxy with autonomous self-replicating robots is a pretty simple task, so the fact that SamuelA can do it is not as much of a technological tour de force as it might seem. All you have to do is build one autonomous self-replicating robot, and send it off into space, and Bob's your uncle. That's it. The exponentially expanding legion of robots do all the rest.

And SamuelA knows exactly how to build one. We have the technology today to do it, and SamuelA has the know-how, as he has frequently (almost obsessively, in fact) informed us. So galactic colonization is upon us. The only mystery is why SamuelA hasn't done it. And the only plausible explanation I can venture is that his Mom won't let him.

But we're going to have to rethink this if the Earth is ever threatened by an asteroid. We can't leave this problem to scientists and engineers who obviously don't understand how momentum works. We're going to need SamuelA, and someone is going to have to get to his Mom to make it happen.

AI Proofreader 12-19-2017 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolfpup (Post 20673526)
I should also point out, in all fairness, that colonizing the galaxy with autonomous self-replicating robots is a pretty simple task, so the fact that SamuelA can do it is not as much of a technological tour de force as it might seem. All you have to do is build one autonomous self-replicating robot, and send it off into space, and Bob's your uncle. That's it. The exponentially expanding legion of robots do all the rest.

And SamuelA knows exactly how to build one. We have the technology today to do it, and SamuelA has the know-how, as he has frequently (almost obsessively, in fact) informed us. So galactic colonization is upon us. The only mystery is why SamuelA hasn't done it. And the only plausible explanation I can venture is that his Mom won't let him.

But we're going to have to rethink this if the Earth is ever threatened by an asteroid. We can't leave this problem to scientists and engineers who obviously don't understand how momentum works. We're going to need SamuelA, and someone is going to have to get to his Mom to make it happen.

Actually, given everything above, the solution is pretty simple.. send your one Von Neumann probe to the asteroid to make copies of itself out of the raw material.. two birds, one stone.

Darren Garrison 12-19-2017 04:12 AM

We could convert the asteroid to millions of copies if John von Neumann. Imagine the problems they could then solve! Of course errors would accumulate in the code leading some of the nanobots to produce copies of John Bon Jovi, and the world would be at risk of a new plague of hair bands.

wolfpup 12-19-2017 10:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AI Proofreader (Post 20674394)
Actually, given everything above, the solution is pretty simple.. send your one Von Neumann probe to the asteroid to make copies of itself out of the raw material.. two birds, one stone.

Brilliant! The self-replicating nanobots munch on the asteroid, self-replicating with furious abandon and humping like rabbits in heat, until there's nothing left of it. Then they all jet off to colonize distant parts of the galaxy, leaving nothing behind but empty space and a bit of nanobot poop.

This is such a simple and efficient means of dealing with an earth-bound asteroid that I'm sure that SamuelA has already thought of it. In fact it sounds exactly like one of his schemes. That's why SamuelA's head is shaped like a mutant rutabaga -- that great bulge at the back holds all the extra brain matter that lets him come up with this stuff, incorporating the physics of momentum conservation that is unknown to ordinary rocket scientists. They are only PhDs from places like MIT Aeronautics and Astronautics, whereas SamuelA actually went to high school (maybe), so he is a man to be reckoned with: according to his own estimation he knows what he is talking about.

Yllaria 12-19-2017 01:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lemur866 (Post 20641264)
. . . It's all so simple! To colonize the moon you just invent self-replicating factories, send one to the moon, and you're done. To solve immortality, you just invent a way to extract the complete personality, thoughts and memory from a frozen human brain, and you're done. . . . .

Combine those two and you have the Bobiverse. But you have to find the right Bob.

Qadgop the Mercotan 12-19-2017 02:42 PM

Our pittee makes me think of this Dunning-Kruger effect graph.

Tripler 12-20-2017 03:38 AM

I'm reading through his asteroid redirectin' thread and have stumbled on a convincing explanation: Gene Ray never died, he just took a sock.

I see our favorite "Science Expert" is still basing his 'scientific expertise' on the hopes that an asteroid has tungsten in it.

Tripler
I had a post there, but it got eaten by the dog on 'Preview.'

Shodan 12-20-2017 07:26 AM

Yeah, I saw the tungsten reference in that thread, but I was afraid to ask what the hell it meant for fear he would explain and then my brains would melt out my ears.

We need to get SamuelA and that guy who did thought experiments on going faster than light into the same thread. Add some nanobots, a shaped nuclear charge, and some self-replicating solar panels, and then you got a thread.

Regards,
Shodan

Sunny Daze 12-20-2017 10:34 AM

Ka-boom. Earth-shattering ka-boom!

(na actual harm, real or imagined, to the subject of this thread)

Darren Garrison 12-20-2017 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shodan (Post 20676567)
We need to get SamuelA and that guy who did thought experiments on going faster than light into the same thread.

Is that the guy who wanted to do some sort of experiment with spinning discs? I think that thread was before my time here, but I've read it in the archives.


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