View Single Post
Old 09-11-2017, 10:02 AM
CandidGamera CandidGamera is offline
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Morgantown, WV
Posts: 10,860
11.13 - The Christmas That Almost Wasn't

Film : The Christmas That Almost Wasn't
Episode : 210 (counting the MST3K Movie)
Secret Number : 014

Film Synopsis : Oh, man. Santa's Scrooge-ian landlord hates kids and wants to ruin Christmas, and will do so unless Santa can come up with the rent money by Christmas eve. This movie is the equivalent of a filmic fruitcake, utterly inedible and made of bits that nobody wants. Also : Terrible songs.

Series and Episode Thoughts : Our penultimate episode of the 11th season, they're clearly still building towards the marriage plot for the finale. We get a Joel cameo as Santa, and they're trying their damnedest to invoke the spirit of MST3K's previous Christmas episodes, but the movie's just not up to snuff.

Important Stuff : Nothing of note, apart from Joel's cameo (beyond his usual role as Ardy)

HS 1 : Jonah and the Bots are Christmas Caroling, nobody knows the lyrics to Good King Wenceslas.

Invention Exchange : Some wedding preparations. Jonah presents the Re-Gifter; Kinga and Max present Humbug FM, an antidote to omnipresent Christmas music.

HS 2 : Jonah and the Bots review (negatively) classic children's toys. Bubble Edit.

HS 3 : Jonah and the Bots take time to examine some of the creepy toys featured in the actual movie.

HS 4 : Joel pops up as Santa, to chat with Jonah and the Bots.

HS 5 : Mimicking a section of the movie that devolved into stills, Jonah and the Bots exchange Christmas sweaters in a series of stills.

Memorable Riffs : Lots of Dune references in this one, oddly. The running gag about the Lawyer wanting to be treated as Santa's little baby is funny, but also creepy.

Tom : "This must be what it's like to live inside an advent calendar."

Jonah : "Topol IS Santa!"

Crow : "Do you even chair, bro?"

Crow : "Whoa, this tea kicked in fast."

Tom : "Oh, good, a rhyming dictionary."

Jonah : "Nightmare fuel!" (Callback)

Tom : "What did they cut out of this movie if this is what they kept?"

Crow : "Jonah, can't we just get Beyond Thunderdome?" (Callback)

Tom : "Weekend at Bernie's 3 : Blossom's Revenge."

Jonah : "Is he summoning Beetlejuice to help Santa?"

Crow : "I've never been so grateful for a cutaway."

Kickstarter Backers : Up to Wil Shipley, covers a lot of 'The's'. (e.g., 'The Andersons').

Stinger : Santa learns to laugh, and laughs too hard.
-Official Doper Brat #007- When life gives you harlequins, make a harlequinade.
I am the very model of the modern kaiju Gamera / I've a shell that's indestructible and endless turtle stamina. / I defend the little kids/ and I level downtown Tokyo/ in a giant free-for-all mega-kaiju rodeo.

Last edited by CandidGamera; 09-11-2017 at 10:03 AM.