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Old 02-09-2003, 11:26 AM
Jeff Wilder Jeff Wilder is offline
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Down South
Posts: 16

1997 Directed by James Cameron.

Jack: My name is Jack. I am an artist and I like to draw pictures of people naked. This here is my latest subject. Her name is Rose.

Rose: I'm engaged to a wealthy snob and I'm prepared to kill myself when Jack saves me. So I agree to let him paint me and along the way I discover that I'm in love with me. So we wind up doing the you-know-what.

Captain: They are on my ship, which is unsinkable.

Voice: (From Off screen) ICCCCEEEBEEERG!!!


Voices: We're sinking!!!

Jack: Follow me everyone.

(All characters jump into lifeboats)

Jack: Rose I love you. But I need to sacrifice myself to end the movie and so Celine Dion will have a hit song to sing over the closing credits.

Rose: Okay Jack. I love you. Goodbye (Hops into life boat)

(Boat sinks with Jack on it.)

(Closing credits feature song that sounds like a yak yodeling.)
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it-Russell Baker