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Old 07-27-2016, 03:09 AM
DKW is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Hawaii
Posts: 2,959
[Okay, here's what took me so long...our cable provider, which was SUCH A HUGE GIGANTIC IMPROVEMENT over the last one, crapped out on Monday from about 5:30 to the entire freaking end of the day. So I recorded Esquire Network's 5:00 repeat today, and then discovered that, for some nefarious reason, our device cannot properly record this channel. Meaning I had to watch most of it in real time, and then the 9:00 repeat to get the first 35 minutes that I missed the first time. Oh, and apparently what caused this massive service interruption was a "tropical storm", which had exactly the same effect where I live as the past five or so hurricanes (saunalike humidity, a couple of middling showers, saunalike humidity, more goddam fricking saunalike humidity). I remember when the island was hit full-force by an ACTUAL hurricane, and it didn't cause a hundredth as much damage as these dinky-dink storms. Oh, and did I mention that the cable provider is also the internet provider and the telephone provider, which meant that we were essentially blind for half a day? Anyway, not much fun.]

Tyler Yamauchi - He's short. And a gymnast. Which makes him a short gymnast. And he got up the six inches taller Warped Wall. Which, in turn, makes him a short gymnast who made it up the six inches taller Warped Wall.
Eric Middleton - Entymology! Insects! The study of insects, entymology!
P.J. Granger - Just a small town boy...uh...Tom Petty song...wait, I mean John Mellencamp song...
Andrew "Roo" Yori - Who let the dogs out! Roo, roo, roo-roo! Who let the dogs out! Roo, roo, roo-roo! Does anyone know a single other word of this song! Roo, roo, roo-roo!
Ethan Swanson - Wow. This was a good one. So good, I'm amazed it made it through. He's a daredevil who makes some really impressive YouTube videos, and that's pretty much sells itself. If Pom Wonderful had a "Crazy Wonderful Story of the Night", this would be it!
Ian Dory - He built a tower to simulate Staaaage Foooouurr! Which is a rope climb! But it's a really long rope climb, so shut up!
Dan Polizzi - Damn you, Ring Toss! Damn you to Hell! Oh yeah, bro bro bro bro bro bro bro bro.
Meagan Martin - Demolished prelims three times, yet failed to even make it to the back half in Cityfinals. Which, of course, has nothing to do with the fact that some of the obstacles get tougher in Cityfinals and the pressure's about a thousand times greater.
Jake Murray - He bought a used car for $600, and he says it's a great car but it's actually a total piece of junk ha ha ha ha ha ha. No, I'm not kidding. No, it didn't lead to anything. No, seriously, that was it.

Competition-wise, it was a pretty interesting night. This was the first time in a while where the knockouts were pretty evenly spread among the obstacles, which was a welcome change. Wasn't sold on toughening up multiple obstacles, but it hasn't been a killer and this new crop of experienced competitors looks like they're up to the challenge. Liked the revamped Hourglass Drop, and I truly hope this teaches the producers a lesson that going easier can sometimes be beneficial. I was sure Circuit Board would be a killer (that thing looked nasty) and was actually surprised that more succeeded than failed, 5-3.

And of course, there was Meagan Martin. And look, I'm all for inspiring efforts and breaking barriers, but at some point we have to acknowledge that, even within certain groups, some competitors are a lot better than others. Tonight was the night when Martin not only broke away from all the Allison Topperweins and Dayna Fishers, but even the likes of Michelle Warnky and Tiana Webberley, whom, in years past, most of us would've put together without a thought. Martin truly is on another plane, and she's kept a fantastic attitude throughout. I'm definitely looking forward to seeing what she can do in Stage 1.

Oh, trivia: this was the first Cityfinals where all 30 qualifiers got some screen time. I'll have a full reckoning later, of course, but just thought you'd like to know.