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Old 09-06-2019, 01:24 AM
Mama Zappa is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 12,412
Originally Posted by slalexan View Post
Speaking of poop...

You all already know that my daughter has autism. Part of her specific needs include issues with sensory integration. Specifically, she's not potty trained. Now, before you start telling me all your magical tips on how to potty train a stubborn child, please know that we have tried it, it didn't work, it's mostly like sensory and, hopefully, she'll get better with therapy.

Anyway, she started school yesterday. Yesterday was a short like orientation day for all the new kindergarteners. Today is the first day of real school. And it started poorly. She needs a harness on the bus because she can't sit still and will wander if given the opportunity, even on a moving bus. We had this put in her IEP, which we went over at the end of May. Transporation has had it since the end of May and they responded that they would be able to accomodate her. Last week, we went to transportation and got her harness, reminding them of her needs. Of course the bus showed up and was not equipped to handle her harness. Transportation called me and told me they would send another bus and then called me about 10-15 minutes later asking me to just take her to school, with the assurance that they would fix the issue for the afternoon bus.

So I did. Then, I went to work, angry, but sure things were getting better. I'm about 1/3rd of the way to work when the school called me again, telling me that my daughter has pooped her pants and that I must come and change her. And I'm like, wut? This is our plan? I told them she wasn't potty trained in May. I was upfront about it. We put a "potty plan" in place. But now every time she has an accident, I need to come in and change her? That's just absurd. Her teacher seemed genuinely surprised that my daughter has issues with this, as did the principal and her IEP coordinator.

And as the icing on the cake, when I got there to change her, she wasn't even poopy. She just has the farts. (She was wet and does have the skills to change herself as long as someone prompts her.)

I sent emails, I tried not to be emotional, just concerned and with an attitude of teamwork on solving the problem. I feel so out of my depth.
Ugh. SOOOOO frustrating.

The school can abso-fucking-lutely deal with cleaning her up if needed. Our Dweezil, also autistic, was not potty trained when he went to kindergarten.

To be fair, we sent him in pullups, not regular underwear, but still, they handled it if needed. I think we did get him into underwear by some time in first grade (by buying a scooter, telling him he had to get dressed to play with it, then whoopsie, we had run out of his daytime pullups).... which resulted in a couple of "sock-drenchers" as the teacher put it before he really got it during the day. Of course, then he developed encopresis which was a treat in and of itself.