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Old 02-02-2017, 10:58 AM
The Other Waldo Pepper The Other Waldo Pepper is offline
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 14,741
Originally Posted by PatrickLondon View Post
The bit at the end of formula murder mysteries: everybody has been gathered together for the unveiling of the murderer, who has been duly escorted from the scene, and then the Nice-But-Dim character says to the detective "But there's one thing I don't understand - why did [whoever] borrow the [whatever] and pretend they were [whatever]?".

Just once, I'd like the detective to say "Search me, I haven't the faintest idea."
Columbo pretty much did this once -- amiably telling the guy who's sure been a real help on this investigation that we haven't found any evidence, and maybe there is no evidence to be found; but since the victim only had one contact lens in, my theory is that her other contact lens fell out when her body was being moved from the crime scene in the trunk of a car. Or maybe when she took that blow to the head?

Anyhow, that of course prompts a desperate Robert Culp to stage a break-in, because his car is in a mechanic's garage and it's clearly time to rummage through that trunk like a man possessed. And he finds a contact lens! And that's when Columbo, and the husband of the deceased, and so on and so forth, pop out to confront him; he makes a decent try at tossing the evidence, but he's been caught dead to rights and knows it and confesses. Because, c'mon: how was he going to explain breaking in?

So he's dragged off by the cops, and grieving widower Ray Milland remarks that they're lucky she lost that contact lens -- except, it turns out, no, that's not her contact lens. Which prompts a perplexed question: if it wasn't hers, then whose was it?

The great detective replies -- "Who knows? Anyway, it doesn't make any difference."