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Old 05-18-2001, 01:47 PM
CalMeacham CalMeacham is offline
Join Date: May 2000
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 42,058
One of my former landlords created my apartment by closing up an archway in his apartment, cutting his original apartment in half. He got the front living room (the only room sharing a floor with mine) and the upstars. I got the Dining Room (now my living room), the kitchen, bathroom, and two bedrooms. He had carpenter friends fill in the covered-over archway with a bookcase that took up the whole wall. I filled it, and still had boxes of books left over.

He used to like to have sex with his girlfriend on the couch in his living room, right next to that archway. My landlord was ...ahhh.. a jumbo-sized guy. When they went at it the entire room shook. He also breathed loud enough to be heard easily through the wall, which was none too thick to start out with.

It was embarassing to have anyone over. You couldn't exactly pretend nothing was going on when my entire room started to shake, including the couch and chairs we were sitting in.

Need I point out that I found nothing at all sexy about this? To me sex isn't a spectator sport in any case. I couldn't imagine even the most fanatic voyuer getting worked up over this jackhammer sex.
On weekends, Hogwarts had The Sorting Hat separate the laundry. It hated that.